TBoneTX

Du-u-u-u-ude!

Woo-hoo!

Wednesday means that it's time for our highly effective* Semiofficial Semiweekly VAWA-Thread Joke: *that is, if correlation = causation ================================= WORDPLAY The baker who sliced four loaves of bread at once with a meat-ax was known as a 4-loaf cleaver. My elm tree is peeling badly, but it's recovering from Dutch Elm disease. Its bark is worse than its blight. There's a branch of science devoted to the study of corns among dogs with hard paws. It's called Hard-Paw Cornography. There was a fire at a detergent factory. The walls fell in with a deafening sud. Two boll weevils went to the big city. One became rich and famous. The other remained the lesser of the two weevils.

Yee-HAAAAA! [Note to T-B.'s self: Jokes worked again... jokes worked again...] You'd be working with the Congressman's "immigration liaison," possibly based in Washington, DC.

Thrilling Tuesday-on-Wednesday report, see man: Breakfasted/skoolbused Mini-B., groggy Two Guys man. Breakfast (!?) was nuked frozen egg patties, ingest we man. Returned for siesta #1, relatively successful zzz we man. Took Uncle T-B. to doctor caucus, chauffeur we man senior he man man. Took Uncle T-B. to lunch at nearby sit-down Chinese place*, ingest heartily we and senior he man man. *with use of $Many-off coupon, F$WM From there, visited Mama T-B., visit we man senior she man man. Mama T-B. too sleepy to yell at us much, boon man. From there, visited Costco Business Center, enter for 2 exit with Many (2+1) items we man. Returned to casa and demanding miu, service miu we man. Handled a couple of updates regarding Estranged Aunt T-B., handle we man. Took siesta #2, massively needed relatively successful zzz we man. Din-din was shepherd's pie from Aldi, ingest Two Guys man. Toward end, got call from Cousinette-Once-Removed T-B., and it was The Call man. Estranged Aunt T-B. had died, peacefully bye she man man. Hospice nooser got on the line with us and confirmed this, si man. We had the funeral arrangements set on both ends, hard work Monday man. Called long-time noosering facility where EA T-B. had lived, call we man. Got some information on known property/estate details, not much and much neglect by EA man. Immediately got call from Texas lawyer, consult man. In short, we are to study assets/solvency before committing to administer estate, firm advice man. There is NO urgent hurry to act on anything, surprise to us but accepted by us man. We will wait to see what papers & info the noosering facility can send us, decide logically man. Called Mama T-B., sad call we man. Mama T-B. tells us that it's our ethical & moral duty to administer the estate, emotional senior she man man. If we decline, we won't stop anybody else from doing it, no man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we and are you kidding man. We must see Uncle T-B. specially on Wednesday to inform him, sad duty man. Uncle T-B. has a gentle nature and loved EA T-B. dearly, truth man. We have some ideas in mind, hope we can pull them off man. And that was/is our thrilling Tuesday, report we man.

That's HOW we celebrate Christmas, you inferior primate, see man!

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Scintillating Monday repartee, yawn man. --- Thrilling (?) Monday report, see man: Chauffeured Little Lord Fauntleroy to skool, "it's too cold to walk to the skoolbus Dad" man. Spent all morning/afternoon calling funeral homes, religious authorities, social workers, and legal agencies, call we man. We think that we have Estranged Aunt T-B.'s arrangements ready to go when it happens, si man. Lunch was toucans of chicken noodle soup, ingest we man. Spent evening updating Mama T-B. & Cousinette-Once-Removed T-B. on progress, update we man. Mama T-B. actually sounds quite impressed, hard-to-please senior she man man. She didn't even yell at us much for skipping our promised visit, amazing man. Somehow got an exhausted siesta, zzz we man. Din-din was 2 "Hungry Man" boneless-chicken din-dins with r'br, ingest Two Guys man. Movie night (amidst updating relatives) was Fatman, watch Two Guys man. Many (2+1) bowls of Costco popcorn were consumed, ingest Two Guys man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we and are you kidding man man. Must take Uncle T-B. to doctor on Tuesday, chauffeur senior he man we man man. Must visit Mama T-B., can't put off any longer man. Somehow must continue with arrangements, need to locate estate/probate attorney man. And that was/is our thrilling Monday, report we man.

Pingüino ice cream in Ecu is the best.

A good travel history can be helpful in showing ties. If you've left your country in the past and returned, present this evidence.

Great!

Scintillating Sunday repartee, yawn man. ----- Thrilling Sunday report, see man: We zzz'd overnight like a dead thing, dead we man. Rather early, Cousinette-T-B.-Once-Removed texted, contact she man we man man. Estranged Aunt* T-B., Mama T-B.'s/Uncle T-B.'s "baby" sister, is near death from sepsis, days left man. *not from malice but rather from preference, explain we man EA has been in a noosering facility out-of-state for at least Many years, too fat & infirm to move man. Infected bedsores got out of control despite best efforts, matter of time when bedridden man. EA has no estate documents, man. We are going to have to handle the eventual funeral and settle-estating long-distance, man. We are also going to have to monitor Uncle T-B., to be consumed with grief senior he man man. Ironically, most important will be to get EA off Uncle T-B.'s beneficiary designations, otherwise all is hosed man. We spent most of Sunday researching what to do and how, research we man. We barely got to see any of our NFL game, sigh man. No Sunday siesta, absolute heresy man. LL is still baking at this writing, nearly midnight man. And EA hasn't died yet, no man. If anyone has had to do this business interstatedly, by all means contribute man. Lunch was MTG, ingest we man. Din-din was spaghetti/meat sauce brought by ex-Mrs.-T-B., amazingly no cilantro in it man. Mini-B. arrived for Two Guys week, to be truncated on Saturday morning man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. is taking Mini-B. on a Many-day ([2+2]-day) cruise during Christmas week, cruise they man. Meanwhile, we are glued here caregiving and soon-to-be settle-estating, sigh man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man. Caucuses with case managers, funeral homes, lawyers, and more on Monday, whoopee for we man man. And that was/is our thrilling Sunday, report we man.

HAPPY MONKEY DAY TO ALL, EVEN INFERIOR PRIMATES.

We are in crucial need of our Official Weekly VAWA-Thread Joke: =========================================== THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY I wish I were as thin as my patience. I used to think that I was indecisive. Now, I'm not so sure. Dear Naps: I'm sorry I was a jerk to you as a kid. What if soy milk is just regular milk introducing itself in Spanish? There are three things that never lie: children, drunks, and yoga pants. The first five days after the weekend are the hardest. I childproofed my house, but the kids still get in. I just did a week's worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.