VAWA, Part 9

[TBoneTX 45,361]

This is the continuation thread for VAWA, Part 8

 

which was closed for size.  Please pick up where you left off, and newcomers can feel free to join in.

[TBoneTX 45,361]

This is the continuation thread for VAWA, Part 8 --

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/620758-vawa-part-8/

-- which was closed because of its large size.

 

Please pick up where you left off, and newcomers can feel free to join in.

Edited August 31, 2017 by TBoneTX

[EricInPS 6]

During a long and varied conversation with an intimate friend, she revealed to me that her American husband of three years has been repeatedly raping her since the first day of their marriage. He, apparently, has no regard for her feelings on the matter, and initiates sex on a whim. No foreplay, no lubrication, just violent insertion and 30 seconds of pain.  She had used the word "rape" once before, a couple of months ago, stating that she feels "like he is raping me". Upon being pressed tonight she admitted that she feels this way every time he initiates sex. I asked her why she does not leave him and she replied that she is 80% of the way towards her Permanent Resident Green Card, having fulfilled all requirements, and filed the I-751 in March of this year. She is terrified that leaving him, or reporting him to authorities, will jeopardize her immigration status because she believes that USCIS will believe a USC over an immigrant, and that, undoubtedly, he would deny the accusation. She is very wary of amending the I-751 at this stage for the same reasons.

 

I asked her if she ever said "no" to his advances. She has not, assuming that a wife cannot, or should not, withhold sex from her husband. She is afraid that, at this point, it would be a he said/she said type of situation, with her on the losing end.  I feel her only option, short of enduring this abuse for another year, is to file an amended I-751 using the VAWA avenue, but, again, she is extremely wary of changing things, or alerting USCIS to problems in her marriage.

 

Can someone point me towards valid information that is easy to understand regarding her options?

 

BACKGROUND: She hails from a wealthy Chinese family who offers substantial monetary support, so money is not a problem. She left China to escape another abusive husband. While in the US, she has attended school, and is awaiting licensure in her home state, although she is already licensed in several other states and is intent on opening her own business.

 

 

[rose michigan 75]

Hello VAWA filers..sorry I have a long story and questions regarding my friend.. She was married to her husband last year, he entered as a K1 Fiance.. They have a baby who is a 4 month old now, her husband got his work permit 3 Months after applying , but he was so lazy and dependent, he worked for 2 Months and got fired , they started to have fights about his in responsibilty , he used to tell her you do not need my money you are rich, and started to make excuses not work.. Then she was realy sick and hospitalized one day before his AOS interview, so she had to cancel the appointment, they told them the next interview will be in 4 months and he was so angry he left her at the hospital after screaming on her.. And then he started to say bad things about her to his friends and family,, then she told him that she bought all the baby stuff and she needs him to start a new job to help her , because she will be off work after delivery , he said ok and the next week he said he lost his work permit , she told him to re apply and he got angry and she said i am thinking about divorce, did you marry me for the GC and the money only?He said no, i love you.. she delivered the baby and One day at 5 am in the morning the police knocked their door and asked about her, The police officer said, her husband called them and said someone stole all his papers and Ids from his car, he said i checked the car and there is nothing like a break or steal, i will just report it as lost.. And BTW your husband came to our office twice before to report stolen stuff, and he mentioned that you had a fights !! 

[rose michigan 75]

She knows he is hiding his stuff so he can build a case againest her, because she asked for the divorce and he said no ((according to their religion , the man only can give the divorce)) , so she hired a lawyer and preperd to file after trying several times to ask him for a divorce.. He told her i need to have my GC first.. So he was served the divorce papers after that and made an infopass abd cancelled her affadivit of support.. Without telling him because she was affraid to hurt her.. On the same day after he was served , one of his friends told her friend that he filed for VAWA , stating that she abused him mentally, and he will take the baby To his home country and her money .. she is affraid , she applied for a PPO, but they told her there is not sufficient evidence.. Her qs is will they approve his faked VAWA case? and the child custody? thank you

[Tortmaster 75]

4 hours ago, rose michigan said:

She knows he is hiding his stuff so he can build a case againest her, because she asked for the divorce and he said no ((according to their religion , the man only can give the divorce)) , so she hired a lawyer and preperd to file after trying several times to ask him for a divorce.. He told her i need to have my GC first.. So he was served the divorce papers after that and made an infopass abd cancelled her affadivit of support.. Without telling him because she was affraid to hurt her.. On the same day after he was served , one of his friends told her friend that he filed for VAWA , stating that she abused him mentally, and he will take the baby To his home country and her money .. she is affraid , she applied for a PPO, but they told her there is not sufficient evidence.. Her qs is will they approve his faked VAWA case? and the child custody? thank you

Only USCIS can decide on the VAWA. Your friend needs to focus on getting a divorce and getting custody of her child. The VAWA part is none of her concern.

[Tortmaster 75]

5 hours ago, EricInPS said:

During a long and varied conversation with an intimate friend, she revealed to me that her American husband of three years has been repeatedly raping her since the first day of their marriage. He, apparently, has no regard for her feelings on the matter, and initiates sex on a whim. No foreplay, no lubrication, just violent insertion and 30 seconds of pain.  She had used the word "rape" once before, a couple of months ago, stating that she feels "like he is raping me". Upon being pressed tonight she admitted that she feels this way every time he initiates sex. I asked her why she does not leave him and she replied that she is 80% of the way towards her Permanent Resident Green Card, having fulfilled all requirements, and filed the I-751 in March of this year. She is terrified that leaving him, or reporting him to authorities, will jeopardize her immigration status because she believes that USCIS will believe a USC over an immigrant, and that, undoubtedly, he would deny the accusation. She is very wary of amending the I-751 at this stage for the same reasons.

 

I asked her if she ever said "no" to his advances. She has not, assuming that a wife cannot, or should not, withhold sex from her husband. She is afraid that, at this point, it would be a he said/she said type of situation, with her on the losing end.  I feel her only option, short of enduring this abuse for another year, is to file an amended I-751 using the VAWA avenue, but, again, she is extremely wary of changing things, or alerting USCIS to problems in her marriage.

 

Can someone point me towards valid information that is easy to understand regarding her options?

 

BACKGROUND: She hails from a wealthy Chinese family who offers substantial monetary support, so money is not a problem. She left China to escape another abusive husband. While in the US, she has attended school, and is awaiting licensure in her home state, although she is already licensed in several other states and is intent on opening her own business.

 

 

A conditional resident cannot file VAWA. A Form I-751 waiver is available for  conditional residents  who have been battered or abused by their U.S. citizen spouse. She can file for a waiver of the joint-filing requirement based on abuse.

[EricInPS 6]

36 minutes ago, Tortmaster said:

A conditional resident cannot file VAWA. A Form I-751 waiver is available for  conditional residents  who have been battered or abused by their U.S. citizen spouse. She can file for a waiver of the joint-filing requirement based on abuse.

Should she file a waiver even though she has already filed the I-751 with her husband as co-signer and is just waiting on a decision? The regulations specifically address life changes like divorce, or the death of a spouse. Nowhere does it list separation as a reason to re-submit the I-751. The fact is that even if she were to file for divorce today, it might not even be finalized until after she receives her unconditional status. She feels that re-filing now would push her to the back of the line, something that would just terrify her more. 

[Tortmaster 75]

20 minutes ago, EricInPS said:

Should she file a waiver even though she has already filed the I-751 with her husband as co-signer and is just waiting on a decision? The regulations specifically address life changes like divorce, or the death of a spouse. Nowhere does it list separation as a reason to re-submit the I-751. The fact is that even if she were to file for divorce today, it might not even be finalized until after she receives her unconditional status. She feels that re-filing now would push her to the back of the line, something that would just terrify her more. 

She does not need to be divorced to file a waiver based on abused. Re-filing will push her timeline back but it is up to her and what she can endure. It is more important for her to be safe.

[Hopeful diva 99]

The journey continues 🙂

[Sandra G. 5,048]

10 hours ago, EricInPS said:

During a long and varied conversation with an intimate friend, she revealed to me that her American husband of three years has been repeatedly raping her since the first day of their marriage. He, apparently, has no regard for her feelings on the matter, and initiates sex on a whim. No foreplay, no lubrication, just violent insertion and 30 seconds of pain.  She had used the word "rape" once before, a couple of months ago, stating that she feels "like he is raping me". Upon being pressed tonight she admitted that she feels this way every time he initiates sex. I asked her why she does not leave him and she replied that she is 80% of the way towards her Permanent Resident Green Card, having fulfilled all requirements, and filed the I-751 in March of this year. She is terrified that leaving him, or reporting him to authorities, will jeopardize her immigration status because she believes that USCIS will believe a USC over an immigrant, and that, undoubtedly, he would deny the accusation. She is very wary of amending the I-751 at this stage for the same reasons.

 

I asked her if she ever said "no" to his advances. She has not, assuming that a wife cannot, or should not, withhold sex from her husband. She is afraid that, at this point, it would be a he said/she said type of situation, with her on the losing end.  I feel her only option, short of enduring this abuse for another year, is to file an amended I-751 using the VAWA avenue, but, again, she is extremely wary of changing things, or alerting USCIS to problems in her marriage.

 

Can someone point me towards valid information that is easy to understand regarding her options?

 

BACKGROUND: She hails from a wealthy Chinese family who offers substantial monetary support, so money is not a problem. She left China to escape another abusive husband. While in the US, she has attended school, and is awaiting licensure in her home state, although she is already licensed in several other states and is intent on opening her own business.

 

 

 

Over 20.000 men and women, every year applied to obtain permanent residence in this Country based on abuse, and 80% of the cases are approved.  The abuse is a choice made by the abuser, it's not a consequence of an act, but your friend staying in this kind of situation shows how bad her mental state is right now. She got to the point that most survivors reach, where they lost self-respect and self-esteem.

 

The survivors that I help they stay in the abusive relationship because they have kids and they are afraid to be deported and not able to take the kids together, others are afraid because going back to their countries they will be rejected by their families etc,others because are living here for years and years etc, but your friend decided to endure abuse because of a green card, really??  Right now she needs more mental help than immigration help. Talk to her to see a psychologist, her well- being should become her primary focus.

[Sandra G. 5,048]

9 hours ago, rose michigan said:

She knows he is hiding his stuff so he can build a case againest her, because she asked for the divorce and he said no ((according to their religion , the man only can give the divorce)) , so she hired a lawyer and preperd to file after trying several times to ask him for a divorce.. He told her i need to have my GC first.. So he was served the divorce papers after that and made an infopass abd cancelled her affadivit of support.. Without telling him because she was affraid to hurt her.. On the same day after he was served , one of his friends told her friend that he filed for VAWA , stating that she abused him mentally, and he will take the baby To his home country and her money .. she is affraid , she applied for a PPO, but they told her there is not sufficient evidence.. Her qs is will they approve his faked VAWA case? and the child custody? thank you

 

 

 

 

She should focus on getting primary custody of the child. If seems he did not get his GC yet then he can file VAWA. If he has a VAWA case or not just an attorney seeing his papers can say if he has a strong case or not.

 

 

Edited August 31, 2017 by sandranj

[rose michigan 75]

5 minutes ago, sandranj said:

She should focus on getting primary custody of the child. If he has a green card he can't file for VAWA. He can file form I-751 waiver based on bonafide marriage or based on abuse/bonafide marriage. To apply based on abuse and bonafide marriage he doesn't need to be divorced.

He did not get his G.C yet, his 2nd interview was not scheduled yet.. and she filed for the divorce And cancelled her affidavit of support last week.. And he filed for VAWA after that 

Edited August 31, 2017 by rose michigan

[Sandra G. 5,048]

Moderation there are 2 threads "Vawa Part 9".

[Ontarkie 14,236]

~~Threads merged~~