My marriage began as a sham

[changeofheart 0]

I'm asking that everyone keep an open mind as you read my predicament.

Two years ago I married my best friend because he had overstayed his visa and needed a green card. I knew he needed help and we were close enough that we figured we could live as roommates and friends for a few years to satisfy all the requirements. I'm not at all saying what we did was right, but I'm laying the situation out so you'll understand better. The whole thing was much more complicated than I was prepared for and the first year didn't go well, he ended up leaving the state after some tough immigration laws were passed. We went long periods without even communicating. We reconnected when he came to visit me and we began a legitimate romantic relationship. We're very happy together and truly love one another and want to be together. We're starting the immigration process but there are obviously a few kinks. For starters we still live in different states. I have a good job with benefits and I care for an elderly grandparent, all my family is here in this state. He's working out of state because he has no work permit and my state is very harsh on immigration. I visit once a month and my family is very supportive of the relationship. Our plan is to get him legal so we can live together in my home state near my family. He's very close with them as he has non of his own in the states.

I'm on his car, car insurance, utility bills, etc and he's listed as beneficiary on my life insurance. We've been saving boarding passes and receipts from my trips to see him. Our phone records show that we talk at least twice a day. The problem is that there's a year gap in our evidence. We don't want to fabricate anything because we're already on thin ice since we live apart. How do we explain the lack of photos or anything from that time? I'm worried now because it took so long to start this process that there will be too many red flags and he won't get approved.

[changeofheart 0]

Oh and to add he's from a European country with no reputation for fraud which is one of the only bright spots in this situation.

[Ryan H 3,810]

Moved from Effects of Major Family Changes on Immigration Benefits forum to Adjustment of Status from Work, Student, & Tourist Visas forum.

**Organizer hat off**

Given the complexities that the background of your case has, I am going to suggest that you speak to and retain an attorney.

[changeofheart 0]

We have an immigration attorney, we just don't know how honest we should be for fear he'll drop our case.

How would it affect the case if I admitted to having "cold feet" early into the marriage and being overwhelmed by the process of marrying an immigrant and it caused a strain for that time period? That's really not far off from the actual situation.

[Ryan H 3,810]

You need to be honest about everything. Lies (including lies by omission) will catch up to you and cause more problems.

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

This thread is about how to lie about committing fraud and I think it should be closed as a violation of the TOS. Your "cold feet" story is a bold faced lie.

[changeofheart 0]

Well the thing is we intended to commit fraud in the beginning but our marriage as it stands now is genuine. Would immigration actually have leniency if we told the full story? Does anyone know of similar situations and how they were resolved?

[Ozz777 23]

Only one way to find out. Honesty is always the best policy, even if you don't get the result you want.

[changeofheart 0]

I suppose the best thing to do is be upfront with the lawyer even if that means having to switch lawyers until we find one who can best handle the situation.

In all my searching on the Internet I haven't seen a mention of any similar situations or how they were handled. That's the information I'm really seeking here.

[olsan3 8]

*Open minded opinion*

I understand your situation completely.

Truth is, there are many like you out there(bestfriend/roomate situation,ended up being the real deal). Probably outside VJ. Thing is, they didn't wait that long to get the paperwork done. Because it was always going to get nasty and unknown sacrifices would come up.

Get an attorney, be honest and see where that takes you.

Goodluck and God bless.

PM me if you need someone to talk to.

[Sam and Fen 41]

Reminds me of the movie "Green Card".

[olsan3 8]

Reminds me of the movie "Green Card".

Never heard of it, will check it out.

[Sam and Fen 41]

Never heard of it, will check it out.

Here y'a go: Green Card

[Darnell 8,478]

I'm not certain there's such a hope for approval, since the beneficiary works illegally.

[dwheels76 5,466]

I'm asking that everyone keep an open mind as you read my predicament.

Two years ago I married my best friend because he had overstayed his visa and needed a green card. I knew he needed help and we were close enough that we figured we could live as roommates and friends for a few years to satisfy all the requirements. I'm not at all saying what we did was right, but I'm laying the situation out so you'll understand better. The whole thing was much more complicated than I was prepared for and the first year didn't go well, he ended up leaving the state after some tough immigration laws were passed. We went long periods without even communicating. We reconnected when he came to visit me and we began a legitimate romantic relationship. We're very happy together and truly love one another and want to be together. We're starting the immigration process but there are obviously a few kinks. For starters we still live in different states. I have a good job with benefits and I care for an elderly grandparent, all my family is here in this state. He's working out of state because he has no work permit and my state is very harsh on immigration. I visit once a month and my family is very supportive of the relationship. Our plan is to get him legal so we can live together in my home state near my family. He's very close with them as he has non of his own in the states.

I'm on his car, car insurance, utility bills, etc and he's listed as beneficiary on my life insurance. We've been saving boarding passes and receipts from my trips to see him. Our phone records show that we talk at least twice a day. The problem is that there's a year gap in our evidence. We don't want to fabricate anything because we're already on thin ice since we live apart. How do we explain the lack of photos or anything from that time? I'm worried now because it took so long to start this process that there will be too many red flags and he won't get approved.

So you are saying you married 2 years ago but never filed/ ? why? That's what immigration will want to know. Especially since he was already here illegally. So it already looks like he got married to get out of getting deported. especially with him moving.

No your situation isn't the first but not too many people want to admit they were used at first or scammed (not all sham marriages have a wink and a hand shake to commit fraud up front. At least you both knew what was up no one hurt).

well you did the best thing and get a lawyer. Be totally honest. I mean tell all.