I-129F sent 1 month ago, Fiancee changed her mind

[VeniyaAO 4]

Hi,

I would like some advice. I meet my fiancee on a 2 week trip to eastern europe about 3 months ago. We had a great two weeks together. I proposed, she accepted. I spent weeks completing the I-129f application and sent it in a about a month ago.

I am not sure what has happened with my fiancee? I have treated her like a princess but she seems to have completely lost interest in us getting married and even pursueing the relationship. With each passing week she contacts me less, avoids my phone calls, shows no feelings, and said she just got caught up in the romance at the start and she does not feel like she can come here now and she likes her country. She told me a week ago we should postpone the visa application. I told her that I do not think that is possible. And with the way she is acting it seems the relationship is already over. I feel now I am in a one sided relationship.

I am so upset with her about this. I do not know how she could change her mind so fast and why did she wait until after we sent in the application. The week before I sent in the I-129F she mailed me her forms via fed-ex and paid alot to do so. Then literally a week after I sent it in she tells me she made a mistake. What the #&$%^%%#?? ?

Here are my questions.

I sent in a previous I-129F back in 2002 for a different girl. We never actually cancelled the petition. We just decided to end the relationship and the girl never went to her scheduled appointment. About 6 months later I got an official letter in the mail stating that the petition had been cancelled because the girl was given a visa on a different I-129F petition!

So when I sent in our I-129F last month I included that letter with the application.

Now I am concerned. I do not want to terminate this visa petition, I really like this girl but if she has already decided this life is not for her I can not do anything about it. I have tried to do everything I can think of in the past few weeks to convince her to be with me but it appears she has already made her choice not to come and so now I believe I must cancel the petition.

1) How do I cancel the petition and to show it was not my choice? So I am not blamed. I mean if I send in another I-129F in the future that they do not say I am not a serious man. Because that is not true I really do want a wife and it the girl that has stopped this relationship.

2) If I meet another girl soon and want to create a petition for her? Now I have two failed I-129F's on my record.

A visa attorney I spoke to once told me I can only have two tries with this. What does that mean? I can not marry someone from another country because two I-129F's failed? This relationship breakup was not my choice.

I really would like to marry a foreign wife and I would like to know if there is additional paper work when sending in a 3rd I-129F after two failed relationships? And does it slow the process? Please tell me it is possible try more then twice?

In conclusion, how to cancel the visa and is it possible to send in a I-129F without problem? Or is there something else that needs to be done.

[VeniyaAO 4]

I would like to add that the Notice date received was March 18, 2010. It has not been entered or processed yet. Maybe they will send it back to me?

Edited April 17, 2010 by VeniyaAO

[az110965 252]

Sorry to read that things are not working out - I hope things get better.

As fas as your options, I'm assuming that you haven't received your NOA2 I-129F approval yet. At this point, you can let the petition run it's course and have the paperwork forwaded to the Embassy in Ukraine and if you patch things up with your girl, proceed with the visa interview. Or - you can contact USCIS and cancel the petition now.

As far as your lawyer telling you that you only have 2 opportunities to file for a K-1, he is mistaken. You can file as many times as you want (there was one poster here recently who had 5 previous K-1 visas). The way that the system works is that if you file more than 2 petitions there will be a waiver involved, which can slow the process down - but, it'll get approved because you've never actually had a k-1 visa issued based upon your prior I-129F's.

If things with this woman don't work out and you cancel your I-129F, you can file again for the same woman or a different woman, but you'll have to include a letter with the petition (technically it's a waiver - but not really)...

One piece of advice I'd offer is to get to know the woman you want to marry. 2 weeks is NOT enough time to know this person and one trip is not enough either. It's VERY easy to get caught up in the "newness" of a situation, only to find out later that you have nothing in common, except a great 2 weeks. Take your time, make more than one trip, get to knwo the woman and her family. See her at her best, and her worst. Then you'll know if it's truly time to file an I-129F.

Best of luck,

Alan

[az110965 252]

I would like to add that the Notice date received was March 18, 2010. It has not been entered or processed yet. Maybe they will send it back to me?

Nope - they will not send it back to you... Once you submit paperwork to USCIS it stays with them. The only time they will send you back your petition is if you fail to include payment at the time of submission.

The simple fact that you've received the I-797 means that the petition has been entered into the system

Alan

[soulprovider915 4]

I can't answer all of your questions, but the advice I can give you is "slow down" These things take time. I had to visit my wife 5 times over the course of a year when she was my fiancee years ago. If you meet someone soon, take your time. I'd hate to see this happen to you again. Visit the person a few times before you propose. You'll be better off that way. I would call them about canceling, there is probably a from you can send in.

[sachinky 465]

Seriously. Who proposes after a two week vacation in Eastern Europe? That's NOT enough time to even get to KNOW somebody, let alone decide if you're willing to spend the rest of your life with them. You need to slow down, buddy.

Seems like your girl is over this whirlwind romance. If she is not interested in pursuing this relationship, there's really nothing you can do.

Contact USCIS and withdraw your petition with a notarized statement.

[pushbrk 12,881]

Seriously. Who proposes after a two week vacation in Eastern Europe? That's NOT enough time to even get to KNOW somebody, let alone decide if you're willing to spend the rest of your life with them. You need to slow down, buddy.

Seems like your girl is over this whirlwind romance. If she is not interested in pursuing this relationship, there's really nothing you can do.

Contact USCIS and withdraw your petition with a notarized statement.

Actually, lots of people propose after a week together and many before meeting in person at all. The OP is asking for on-topic immigration information, not judgmental comments.

The OP has nothing to lose by letting his petition run its course. If she doesn't apply for a visa, so be it. At any point, he can decide to withdraw the petition by sending a notarized letter.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

1. Send a notarized letter to the USCIS service center that has your petition stating that you are withdrawing the petition. Your profile says you sent it to the California Service Center. Be sure to cite your case number (WAC....) in the letter.

2. You can file another I-129F. You'll need to request a waiver and be subject to some additional scrutiny.

The lawyer you spoke to was referring to the filing limitations imposed by the IMBRA act. Those limitations come into play if you've had a K1 visa petition approved within the past two years, or if you've filed two or more K1 petitions at any time in your life. The second provision would apply to you, even if you withdraw the petition, because you did file a second petition. There is no standardized form for the waiver request. You just include a letter in your petition package asking for a waiver of the IMBRA filing limitations. USCIS will take it from there.

The majority of IMBRA waivers are approved.

On a personal note, I think you should just cancel the petition and move on. Barring any unusual circumstances that you haven't mentioned, or that she hasn't told you, it sounds like this relationship just fizzled out.

[William33 110]

The OP asked for immigration advice, not judgemental commentary. Please keep judgmental comments to yourself.

[VeniyaAO 4]

Some good advice coming here except for the judgemental comment. I am happy that I can at leaast apply for a waiver. Could anyone expand on the waiver process? Yes, I am not sure what has happened with my fiancee you just seemed to lose interest for no reason. I think she had some family influence and they do not want her to be so far away.

Anyway, if I keep the petition open in hopes of her getting new interest I guess I will see what happens. If I do close it? Would I have to wait until I a get the official letter stating it has been closed before I can submit a new I-129F?

[pushbrk 12,881]

Some good advice coming here except for the judgemental comment. I am happy that I can at leaast apply for a waiver. Could anyone expand on the waiver process? Yes, I am not sure what has happened with my fiancee you just seemed to lose interest for no reason. I think she had some family influence and they do not want her to be so far away.

Anyway, if I keep the petition open in hopes of her getting new interest I guess I will see what happens. If I do close it? Would I have to wait until I a get the official letter stating it has been closed before I can submit a new I-129F?

You "withdraw" not "close" the petition, and no you do not need to wait for confirmation in order to file a new petition. A couple sentences explaining why previous petitions didn't result in a lasting relationship followed by a sentence asking that IMBRA related filing limitations be waived added to a petition cover letter is all that is needed when and if you are ready to file a new petition.

Multiple petitions filed close together can count against you at the interview stage, as your relationships could appear more desperate than genuine.

Edited April 17, 2010 by pushbrk

[BirdyGirl85 23]

Actually, lots of people propose after a week together and many before meeting in person at all. The OP is asking for on-topic immigration information, not judgmental comments.

Well honestly, it might be some good advice for him in the future to have a relationship last, if you get to know the person more before deciding to marry them.

I'm sorry this happened though.

[Bobby+Umit 161]

Some good advice coming here except for the judgemental comment. I am happy that I can at leaast apply for a waiver. Could anyone expand on the waiver process? Yes, I am not sure what has happened with my fiancee you just seemed to lose interest for no reason. I think she had some family influence and they do not want her to be so far away.

Anyway, if I keep the petition open in hopes of her getting new interest I guess I will see what happens. If I do close it? Would I have to wait until I a get the official letter stating it has been closed before I can submit a new I-129F?

I believe you opened the forum up to comments you deem "judgemental" by this part of your post:

I am so upset with her about this. I do not know how she could change her mind so fast and why did she wait until after we sent in the application. The week before I sent in the I-129F she mailed me her forms via fed-ex and paid alot to do so. Then literally a week after I sent it in she tells me she made a mistake. What the #&$%^%%#?? ?

Sachinky merely told you the answer to your "what the "#&$%^%%#??" question and why she changed her mind - two weeks after meeting was not good enough for this particular women.

You have your other answers above.

[SuperDuper! 230]

Actually, lots of people propose after a week together and many before meeting in person at all. The OP is asking for on-topic immigration information, not judgmental comments.

The OP has nothing to lose by letting his petition run its course. If she doesn't apply for a visa, so be it. At any point, he can decide to withdraw the petition by sending a notarized letter.

To be factual here,

1) nothing here needs to be notarized. Everyone is always too quick to want to get all immigration papers notarized, and it is an unneeded effort and expense

2) Should the OP no longer want to petition the beneficiary, all he needs to do is write a brief one-page letter, send copies to the USICS, NVC and Embassy, and declare the relationship as abandoned. Further, once the petition is approved, you can no longer "withdraw" it, but definitely withdraw your affidavit of support and declare that no longer valid.

3) Ask that your letter be construed as a request for IMBRA waiver, should such a waiver be required in the future.

OP, it sounds like you need to make another trip across the ocean to go be with her if you have any hope of proceeding with this relationship. I hope you are not heavily invested with her, emotionally or financially, but by all means cut your losses now if you see the writing on the wall.

May I suggest you seek out a Filipina girl next time. It's really rocking down there in SE Asia, and $USD goes pretty far down there, the ladies speak English, and it aint so freakin' cold, but is toasty warm!

Good luck!

Edited April 17, 2010 by Hopp

[Dakine 26]

If you want to cancel. Send a notarized letter with a copy of the NOA1 receipt notice when you get it.

Good luck if there is another one!