TBoneTX

Associated Press: 'Biden Is Often Alive And Conscious, But Sometimes Mostly Dead' WASHINGTON D.C. — According to the Associated Press, sources close to President Biden reported this week that the embattled president is 'often alive and conscious but sometimes mostly dead.' Despite President Biden's recent tendencies to freeze in rigor mortis, stop breathing and cease brain function, The AP sees encouraging signs that The President is still often alive and even occasionally semi-conscious. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/associated-press-biden-is-partially-alive-but-sometimes-mostly-dead

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Biden To Extend His Sleep Schedule To 24 Hours Per Day WASHINGTON, D.C. — Official sources from within the White House claim that President Biden has just decided to extend his sleep schedule from a mere eighteen hours to twenty-four hours a day in a measure intended to help him stay sharp and coherent as the leader of the free world. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-to-extend-his-sleep-schedule-to-24-hours-per-day

8 Excuses The White House Is Using To Explain Biden's Poor Debate Performance [...] Thanks to some tough undercover journalism, we at the Babylon Bee have managed to acquire a copy of the top eight excuses currently floating around the White House. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/8-excuses-the-white-house-is-using-to-explain-bidens-poor-debate-performance

~~~~~~~~~~~~ Nancy Pelosi Says We Must Re-Elect Biden To See If He's Senile WASHINGTON, D.C. — In response to growing concern from the American people about the president's cognitive ability, Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi said we must re-elect Joe Biden to find out if he's senile. While media reports in the wake of Biden's debate performance against Donald Trump have raised red flags regarding his fitness to continue serving as president, Pelosi stressed how imperative it was to vote to keep him in office in order to learn how impaired he is. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/nancy-pelosi-says-we-must-re-elect-biden-to-see-if-hes-senile

Look at the Faces of the ABC News Panel After Biden's Interview Joe Biden sat down with former Clinton operative George Stephanopoulos for an exclusive ABC News interview that was aimed at quelling the deafening concerns about the president's mental health. It did no such thing. The faces of the panel that were to weigh in on this interview say it all. ABC News' Jon Karl rightly noted that Democrats who watched this disaster are even more worried since Joe doesn't understand that he's losing the election. [...] https://townhall.com/tipsheet/mattvespa/2024/07/05/the-image-that-destroys-bidens-bad-night-narrative-over-dismal-debate-with-trump-n2641456

This authorette thinks that GS's job was to let Bidementia hose himself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ DISASTER: Biden Completely Disconnected From Reality in ABC Interview [...] Stephanopoulos introduced the interview by claiming there had been "no cuts, no edits" to the video. "We have not touched it." There was really no need. There was no way to pretty up the pig tonight. (You can watch the interview in its entirety below.) [...] https://pjmedia.com/paula-bolyard/2024/07/05/disaster-biden-completely-out-of-touch-with-reality-in-abc-interview-n4930419

Ouch. Pieces Don't Get Much Worse Than This... Can you imagine being Jill Biden and reading this paragraph in New York Magazine? Or Karine Jean-Pierre? Or almost anybody in the Democrat establishment? [...] https://hotair.com/david-strom/2024/07/05/ouch-pieces-dont-get-much-worse-than-this-n3791382

This is a really interesting article, with good reasoning. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dr. Sanjay Gupta: It's time for President Biden to undergo detailed cognitive and neurological testing and share his results When the 46th President of the United States took the debate stage a week ago, it became apparent, even from his first answer, that this would not be the performance he hoped for. For me as a brain specialist, it was concerning to watch President Joe Biden, and it quickly became clear that I was not alone in my reaction. Over the past week, I received more than a dozen calls, texts and emails from medical colleagues who, like me, specialize in the brain. It wasn't that what we noticed was necessarily new but that it was particularly pronounced, and right from the start of the debate. From a neurological standpoint, we were concerned with his confused rambling; sudden loss of concentration in the middle of a sentence; halting speech and absence of facial animation, resulting at times in a flat, open-mouthed expression. To be clear, these are only observations, not in any way diagnostic of something deeper, and none of these doctors wished to suggest that was the case. The consensus from the doctors reaching out to me, however, was that the president should be encouraged to undergo detailed cognitive and movement disorder testing, and those results should be made available to the public. [...] https://www.cnn.com/2024/07/05/health/gupta-biden-cognitive-testing-analysis/index.html

Pssst... VAWA Yee-HAAAAA! [Note to T-B.'s self: Jokes worked again... jokes worked again... ]

Thrilling Friday non-ES report, see man: Got to Favorite Medium-Sized Town at noon, travel we man. Hit ES and thrift shop per above, q.v. man. Breakfast/lunch/din-din was at good Chinese buffet, ingest we man. We consumed Many (2+2) plates heaped with beef/chicken, ingest we man. Went next door to Tractor Supply to buy miu-litter, contiguous man. Went to FST, long time since last visit man. Went to favorite FST restaurant to buy full cherry pie for Two Guys week, incomparable man. It came straight from the kitchen, unparalleled freshness man. We had brought an insulated bag along, keep from melting in Many00-degree heat man. Went to FST supermarket, destination not an option man. Bought Many (2x2x2x2) Powerade Zero grape on sale for $1 each, plus more, serendipity man. Upon sweaty return to casa, considered ways to not take multiple showers, financially savvy we man. After servicing indignant miu, set haircut appointment, enough time to stow groceries man. Got all hairs cut, unfortunately no $pecial$ man. Returned to casa to watch local TV news about ######## hurricane, approaching man. Considered mow-lawning, too tired and can probably do on Saturday if no rain man. Finally showered, highly necessary man. Took late-yet-highly-necessary and uninterrupted siesta, zzz we man. A pretty good Friday, conclude we man. No party with the rubias, exhausted we man. We have itineraried Many (2+2) ESs and an MS for Saturday, itinerary we man. And this was/is our thrilling Friday, report we man.

Friday ES report, see man: Nothing at the ES, but the church thrift shop nearby yielded the take, see man: -- 2 "Mr. Coffee" pots, t-shirt for Mini-B. = $2 + half a buck, steal man Total = $2 + half a buck

I agree with all of these things. As lousy as things are now politically, we can count many blessings. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Americans Are Sharing Aspects Of Everyday Life That They Didn't Realize Were, In Fact, Luxuries Until Traveling Abroad Chances are, there are aspects of your everyday life that you're so accustomed to that you don't even realize that many people around the world would consider them to be true luxuries. So, redditor u/Seraphicly329 asked, "What's a luxury that most Americans don't realize is a luxury?" Here's what people said: [...] https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/people-sharing-everyday-comforts-most-001603198.html

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Here it is. From the reading, GS actually tried to get answers to the meaningful questions. From my reading, I conclude that Bidementia is 100% toast -- this wasn't much better than the debate, and he's hosed. ~~~~~~~~~~ ABC's George Stephanopoulos' exclusive interview with President Biden: Full transcript https://www.yahoo.com/news/abc-news-anchor-george-stephanopoulos-011048400.html

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~~~~~~~~~~~` Employee Lost Like Sailor In Maelstrom After HR Fails To Send Out Quarterly Company Update CLEVELAND—Lacking a North Star to guide him through his workday, local office worker Evan Pullman was reportedly lost like a sailor in a maelstrom Tuesday after the human resources department at Edgemere Industries failed to send out the company's quarterly update. "Dear God! Without an email newsletter recapping our sales goals and top-performing products over the past three months, how will I navigate these turbulent waters before me?" said Pullman, describing [...] https://www.theonion.com/employee-lost-like-sailor-in-maelstrom-after-hr-fails-t-1851570669

Caitlin Clark Brushes Off 23 Stab Wounds From Own Teammates LAS VEGAS—Following another highly physical game for the rookie point guard, Indiana Fever player Caitlin Clark reportedly brushed off the 23 stab wounds she received from her own teammates on the court Tuesday. "The physicality doesn't bother me one bit—it's all part of the game," the pale and visibly woozy WNBA star said at a postgame news conference [...] https://www.theonion.com/caitlin-clark-brushes-off-23-stab-wounds-from-own-teamm-1851566816

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Biden Team Proud Hours Of Grueling Prep Successfully Got President Through Meeting With Family WASHINGTON—Revealing they had holed up in Camp David beforehand and grilled him nonstop for a week straight, President Joe Biden's team confirmed Tuesday they were proud their hours of grueling prep had successfully gotten him through a meeting with his family about continuing to seek reelection. "It was admittedly risky to clear the president's schedule and practice, but it was worth it to ensure he could successfully field a number of extremely difficult, sensitive questions from his wife, son, and grandchildren," said senior advisor Anita Dunn, adding that [...] https://www.theonion.com/biden-team-proud-hours-of-grueling-prep-successfully-go-1851570704

Biden Campaign Unveils New Slogan 'Only Senile Some Of The Time' WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a hotly anticipated announcement, the Biden 2024 Presidential Campaign has just unveiled its exciting new campaign slogan: "Only Senile Some Of The Time." Staffers say that the motto is meant to help redirect growing distrust of the president's failing mental capacities by reminding Americans that Biden is only senile some of the time, rather than suffering from dementia all of the time. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-campaign-unveils-new-slogan-only-senile-some-of-the-time

KJP Claims Biden Still Had Jet Lag From Driving That Big Rig Around In The '60s [...] White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre has stated that Biden was impaired during the debate as he was still suffering from jet lag from driving that big rig around during the '60s. According to her statement, Biden was so exhausted from the jet lag caused by long days and late nights of driving an 18-wheeler tractor-trailer back in the summers of the '60s that he ended up completely unprepared for the first presidential debate. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/kjp-claims-biden-still-had-jet-lag-from-driving-that-big-rig-around-in-the-60s

The Midnight Ride of Caesar Rodney Brought America Independence Listen, my children, and you shall hear of the midnight ride of … Caesar Rodney. While Rodney might not have a famous poem written about his nighttime journey, his ride was just as historic as Revere's and vital to the passage of the July 1776 Declaration of Independence. On July 2, 1776, the delegates for 13 colonies at the Continental Congress voted for American independence from Great Britain. (It then took the delegates two days to agree on an edited draft for the public, hence our July 4 holiday.) But what many Americans don't know is that, on July 1, independence hung in the balance — and one man came to break a tie and ensure the establishment of a new nation. [...] https://pjmedia.com/catherinesalgado/2024/07/04/the-midnight-ride-of-caesar-rodney-brought-america-independence-n4930381

~~~~~~~~~~ THIS! --> Rob Schneider Posts Thoughtful, Super-Helpful Meme That Just So Happens to VAPORIZE Team Biden https://twitchy.com/samj/2024/07/04/rob-schneider-meme-dig-at-biden-n2397986

July 4 Is the Anniversary of More Than American Independence We all know about July 4 and the amazing miracle that happened on this date 248 years ago in Philadelphia. But some of us are old enough to remember another July 4 miracle that happened not in 1776, but in 1976. It was not in Pennsylvania but in Uganda, and it's something we should all be aware of in this world of hostages today. [...] https://pjmedia.com/rabbi-michael-barclay/2024/07/04/july-4-is-the-anniversary-of-more-than-american-independence-n4930395

Another Biden Interview Fumble: He's Proud to Be 'The First Black Woman to Serve With a Black President' [...] Joe needs to just stop talking. He should really take a play out of his boom from 2020 and hide in his basement. Do not be surprised if a new pandemic is being doctored up to make that happen. [...] https://twitchy.com/artistangie/2024/07/04/biden-radio-interview-first-black-president-flub-n2398001