TBoneTX

Scintillating Monday repartee, yawn man. ------- Thrilling Monday report, see man: Tried to zzz in, zzz we man. Was awakened at o'dark o'clock by ex-Mrs.-T-B.'s cheery, "Buenas días!", man. We muttered something like "What ####### time is it, huh man," groggy we man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. didn't care how ####### early it was, no man. Spectacular weather, Texas weather Many man. We managed to grog our way through the morning and roust Mini-B. from bed, disembed wee man we man. Breakfast/lunch for Mini-B. was the 2 leftover pieces of 'roni 'za, ingest wee man. Breakfast/lunch for us was onecan of Aldi chili, ingest we man. After the decent hour of 1 p.m., we took Mama T-B.'s tax poop to her CPA, mollify aysheep senior she man man. We then stopped at the nearby Costco, not our usual one man. It was Many00% mobbed at 2 p.m. on a Monday, albeit Spring Break man. We were fortunate to find parking, finally park T-B.-mobile we man. We got our Many (2+2+1) items, Many (2+1) of them on sale man. We then went to a UPS Store to get Mama T-B.'s shredding done, no shred of doubt man. Mini-B. gamed all day with his amigo, game wee men man. We siesta'd for a glorious hour-plus, zzz we man. Din-din was 2 Hungry Man boneless-chicken frozen din-dins, ingest Two Guys man. Backyard football was played thereafter, this is why we kill ourself mow-lawning man. Mini-B. didn't want a movie night, oh well man. We spent time unenthusiastically searching for chicas on the site, unmotivated we man. Possible party with the rubias tonight, possibly cavort we man. No specific plans for Tuesday, no plan man. And that was/is our thrilling Monday, report we man.

People complain that what DOGE is saving won't put a dent in the national debt. They overlook that "pennies add up."

Yee-HAAAAA! Be sure to look for local events occurring during your visit. And definitely provide a full report.

Uh-Oh: WNBA Players Demand To Be Paid What They're Worth And Now They Owe The NBA $400 Million U.S. — Collective bargaining agreements for the WNBA took an unexpected turn as players demanded to be paid what they are actually worth and now owe the NBA $400 million. Owners were shocked and delighted by the players' demand, immediately accepting and handing over a sheet showing the players' actual worth to be negative four hundred million dollars. "We may have made a mistake here," said WNBA player Angel Reese. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/uh-oh-wnba-players-demand-to-be-paid-what-theyre-worth-and-now-they-owe-the-nba-400-million

'Ladies And Gentlemen, We Got Him': RFK Jr. Announces Seal Team Six Has Neutralized The Kool-Aid Man WASHINGTON, D.C. — HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. announced that Seal Team Six conducted a daring overnight raid and has neutralized the infamous Kool-Aid Man. The Kool-Aid Man did not go down easily, given his remarkable ability to run through walls without sustaining injury. However, his thick glass exterior ultimately proved no match for a rocket fired by an FGM-148 Javelin. "He died like a dog," announced Kennedy. [...]

Laid-Off IRS Agent Gets New Job Checking Receipts At Costco Exit SPRINGFIELD, VA — According to sources, recently laid-off IRS Agent Dirk Peasley has landed on his feet with a brand-new gig as one of those Costco guys who stand at the door and check people's receipts before they're allowed to leave. "This job allows me to keep doing exactly what I love," said Peasley to reporters after checking their receipts. "All day I get to peer into people's private financial information and audit their every expenditure before they leave the building. If there are any discrepancies, I can yell at them and call the police. It's such a great job." [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/laid-off-irs-agent-gets-new-job-checking-receipts-at-costco-exit

Transgender Mouse Obliterates Female Mouse In Laboratory MMA Event LAS VEGAS, NV — Staff members at a local scientific research facility were shocked into silence yesterday, as a transgender mouse tragically ended the career of a mouse that was assigned female at birth during a much-anticipated laboratory mixed martial arts event. The Wheel of Pain MMA 7 main event featuring Cheeto vs. Nibbles ended in a bloodbath when Cheeto, who recently transitioned to female, knocked out the female challenger in the first round. Fan outcry was immediate, with calls for [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/transgender-mouse-obliterates-female-mouse-in-laboratory-mma-event

Trump Secures Peace Deal Where Putin Gets Ukraine During The Week While Zelenskyy Gets Weekends And Two Weeks In The Summer WASHINGTON, D.C. — In another unorthodox move highlighting his ability to think outside the box, President Donald Trump announced that he had secured a peace deal where Putin gets Ukraine on the weekdays while Zelenskyy gets Ukraine on the weekends and for two weeks during the summer. The new deal came after years of brutal fighting and weeks of contentious Trump-brokered negotiations between Russia and Ukraine that had appeared to reach a stalemate. "We brought both sides to the table and all parties have to give and take," said President Trump. "Putin gets [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-secures-peace-deal-where-putin-gets-ukraine-during-the-week-while-zelensky-gets-weekends-and-two-weeks-in-the-summer

Our veterans can comment more meaningfully, but this sounds good to me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hegseth's Navy JAG Nomination Is Another Bold Choice That Indicates Huge Changes Ahead Just two weeks after Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth cashiered the chairman of the joint chiefs of staff, the chief of naval operations, and all three service judge advocates general (see You're Fired: Trump Cans Joint Chiefs of Staff Chairman, Presumably Over Emphasis on DEI – RedState), he has acted to replace the Navy judge advocate general with his personal attorney, former Navy JAG Timothy Parlatore. This will involve not only bringing Parlatore back on active duty but, if the image below is correct, a three-grade bump in rank. [...] https://redstate.com/streiff/2025/03/08/hegseths-navy-jag-nomination-is-another-bold-choice-that-indicates-huge-changes-ahead-n2186439

Thrilling Sunday report, see man: We slept long and rather well, first time in long time after time-change man. We actually left the casa voluntarily on a Sunday, are we feverish man. We had found a 2-Manycade-old Home Despot gift card in the Uncle T-B.-mobile during cleanout, find we man. We went to Home Despot to learn its value, important information man. It is worth $Many.Many ($[2x2x2x2x2 +2+2+2].[2=2+2+1]), windfall profit man. We then went to nearby supermarket with coupons expiring today, last chance man. We used all of them and saved $Many, financially savvy we man. We then went to nearby Subway* for take-casa lunch, ingest we man. *WUOC and gift card, financially savvy we man At casa, serviced demanding miu, warshered sole LL, and siesta'd, zzz we man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. said that she and Mini-B. would not be over in time for AFV, no man. Mini-B. was gaming with amigo, all-day thing man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. was baking a 'roni 'za, invited us over for it man. We were baking/folding LL and did not want to miss AFV, so we declined, si and no man. We said that ex-Mrs.-T-B. could deliver the leftover 'za to us, bargain we man. AFV excellent, watch we and miu** man. **on our lap for nearly the full hour, enlapped miu man Ex-Mrs.-T-B. brought Mini-B. an hour after that, quite late man. As we suspected, ex-Mrs.-T-B. gave us Many (2+2) slices of the 'roni 'za, our slothfulness justified man. Din-din was 2 of those Many (2+2) slices, ingest we man. Dished and must de-dish the warsher, domestic we man. Miu remains quite excited at return of Big Bruddah, excited miu man. Mini-B. just finished gaming with amigo, past bedtime for wee man man. No specific Monday plans, perhaps idly & fruitlessly chase JCs we man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man. And that was/is our thrilling Sunday, report we man.

We would rather that you buy a Pre-Owned Toilet Seat, more lucrative man. We're prepared to offer a handsome 0.0000001% discount off full retail, $i and whee man!

Get them all! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ICE arrests Palestinian activist who helped lead Columbia University protests, his lawyer says NEW YORK (AP) — Federal immigration authorities arrested a Palestinian graduate student who played a prominent role in protests against Israel at Columbia University, according to his attorney. Mahmoud Khalil was inside a university-owned residence Saturday night near Columbia's Manhattan campus when several Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents entered his apartment and took him into custody, his attorney, Amy Greer, told The Associated Press. Greer said she spoke by phone with one of the ICE agents during the arrest, who said they were acting on State Department orders to revoke Khalil's student visa. Informed by the attorney that Khalil was in the United States as a permanent resident with a green card, the agent said they were revoking that too, according to the lawyer. [...] https://www.yahoo.com/news/ice-arrests-palestinian-activist-helped-162258497.html

It is Sunday -- time for our hilarious, highly effectve Official Weekly VAWA-Thread Joke: =========================================== FORGOT HIS PRAYERS A husband and wife were dining at a 5-star restaurant. When their food was served, the husband said, "Our food has arrived! Let's eat!" His wife reminded him, "Honey, you always say your prayers at home before your dinner!" Her husband replied, "That's at home, my dear. HERE, the chef knows how to cook!"

This is an elegant, sensible article. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The vindication of a heretic He might not be as brash as Elon Musk. He might not wield his sword of reform with as much gleeful abandon as Donald Trump does his. Yet Jay Bhattacharya, Trump's pick to run the National Institutes of Health (NIH), is nonetheless fighting an essential fight. His target? Scientism. The tyrannical trend whereby 'science', in his words, 'stands on top of society and says "You must do this, this and this or else"'. He wants to restore science's older, nobler goal of providing people with 'knowledge and freedom'. Everyone who values reason should hope he succeeds. [...] https://www.spiked-online.com/2025/03/07/the-vindication-of-a-heretic/

Addendum to thrilling Saturday report, see in addition man: Took another siesta for close to an hour, necessary zzz we man. Awakened by alarm clock and brief-yet-fierce monsoon, rain like an illegitimate male child man. Temperature probably Many (2x2x2x2x2) degrees colder now, cold front man. We are down to our last remaining pick-up line, see man: "Excuse us, Miss -- we haven't met yet, no man, so we still have a chance with YOU, si man," si man. We hear that the monastery is taking applications for monk(ey)s, so there's that man. You get off your tailless tailbone and find us a chica now, si D ma'am! Bad lazy un-make-matching Ontarklar! Bad, BAD un-make-matching UN-MAKE-MATCHING Ontarklar! We actually got rid of her after we couldn't stand it any longer, perimenopausally psycho she man.

Bad recapping P-Math-impaired Ontarklar! Bad, BAD recapping RECAPPING P-Math-impaired P-MATH-IMPAIRED Ontarklar!

LPoP and unread, no see we or anyone man.

Thrilling Saturday report, see man: Unwillingly awoke WELL before sunrise, perhaps new HSM man. Finally up-gave and arose at half-past Many, ridiculous man. Brunch was 2 turkey-&-cheese sandwiches, ingest we man. Up-picked Many Rx's at CVS for Mama T-B., never seen so many man. Delivered stuff to Mama T-B. and changed clock ahead, ahead-of-power-curve we man. Mama T-B. yelled at us only a little, quick take her temperature man. On way to Mama T-B.'s, learned that the JC was ghosting us yet again, see man: "I had to take my daughter to Louisiana she sick I'll be back Sunday sorry," sheesh man. We set later caucus with buddy at a bar, no chicas for the day man. Attempted siesta almost failed, barely restful man. Met buddy at bar, see we man him man man. Solved all world's problems except those involving chicas, eternal mysteries man. Stayed for nearly Many hours, better than moping at the casa man. Din-din (at the bar) was onebowl of butter chicken, ingest Indian we man man. Returned to casa to feed demanding miu, Where's My Din-Din Daddy miu man. Set all clocks an hour ahead, easier than the converse man. Desperately need another siesta, almost too late for one now man. Sunday shall be prepping for Two Guys mini-week, prep we man. And that was our thrilling Saturday, report we man.

Good expensive fun reported, si man!!!

Yes, except they need to suffer longer.

National Monkey Day is December 14.

This is instructive for those in 2-person families who are on the fence regarding up-signing at Costco...

The early worm gets the bird, supposedly man. We are supposed to get with this elusive JC in a couple of hours, si man. We must do our stuff for Mama T-B. before meeting the JC, si man. Depending on mood and lectures, buzzkill, sigh man. And see what you didn't do there, si man!

They're as homely as mud fences (as Great Walls?), and scrawny too, sigh man. It is possible to teach old dentists new tricks, si man. However, whether they will be internalized is doubtful, sigh man.

Post content intended to degrade, intimidate, or incite violence or prejudicial action against a broad demographic or group of people identified by a unifying trait or characteristic, si man! Reported, si man!!! Post content intended to degrade, intimidate, or incite violence or prejudicial action against a broad demographic or group of people identified by a unifying trait or characteristic, si man! Reported, si man!!! Make comments in a Post either direct or implied toward another member that are purposely designed to upset, antagonize, make fun of, belittle, harass, insult, or otherwise instigate an argument that takes away from the personal enjoyment of the Service by superior primates, si man! Reported, si man!!!