TBoneTX

It is Wednesday -- time for our Semiofficial Semiweekly VAWA-Thread Joke: =========================================== FUNNY ONES I went to the doctor today and told the nurse I got bitten by a wolf. She said, "Where?" I said, "No; a regular." She stared at me for ten minutes. My husband giving me directions like "Head north..." Me: "Listen here, Christopher Columbus -- do I turn at the Taco Bell or go toward Target?" I ran for the first time with my Fitbit on. It detected me running and asked if my life was in danger or if tacos were on sale for $1 again. God creating ducks: "Waterproof that chicken and give it a kazoo!" Tip of the Day: Gas prices are getting a little high, so I went to the dealership and test-drove three cars to run my errands. My body is not a temple. It's a haunted house. It's slowly falling apart, making weird noises, and contains the spirit of an old person who's always mad at something.

A lot of remaining questions... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Here's the Latest NTSB Update on the LaGuardia Crash On Tuesday, the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) hosted an afternoon press conference and provided an update on the investigation into the tragic Sunday night collision between an Air Canada plane and a Port Authority fire truck at LaGuardia Airport (LGA) in New York. NTSB Chairwoman Jennifer Homendy hosted the press conference, beginning with the current status of the investigation. Homendy noted that this was their first full day on scene. They started [...] https://redstate.com/smoosieq/2026/03/24/the-latest-ntsb-update-on-the-laguardia-crash-n2200589

Thrilling Tuesday report, see man: Breakfasted/skoolbused Mini-B., groggy Two Guys man. Breakfast was 2 buttered bagels, ingest we man. Siesta #1 rather unsuccessful, hip pain man. Before noon, Mama T-B.'s CPA called with a couple of questions, could've predicted them man. We up-cleared them in short order, familiar we man. CPA said he'd call with numbers later, call CPA man we man man. As soon as we hung up with CPA, Mama T-B. called, aysheep senior she man man. There were "crises" to help with, get carcass into gear we man to visit senior she man man. The chief crisis was that the Nooser Aides had thrown damp dirty laundry atop dry dirty laundry, man. No matter that the laundry dude was to pick up her stuff in the evening, man. We had to organize it ourself to Mama T-B.'s specifications, man. We did the usual other things, too, regimented senior she man man. While we were there, CPA called, final numbers man. Mama T-B. overpaid, save half for half-of-halfferly payments and other half refunded man. Mama T-B. of course had questions after we hung up, man. Good news is that she doesn't want to see the forms and we can sign them, PoA we man. She will almost certainly change her mind after we've done so, man. Returned to casa too late for a decent siesta, Siesta #2 failed man. Mini-B. wanted initial privacy, probably yak on phone with girlfriend wee man man. We watched the Many-p.m. local news, the national TV news, and the Many-p.m. local news, watch we man. We consumed most of a bag of Aldi-knockoff Fritos, ingest we man. When we ventured upstairs, Mini-B. was zzz-ing lengthwise across his bed, out-zonked wee man man. Din-din (after Many [2+2+2+1] p.m.) was breaded chicken chunks + canned corn + r'b'r, ingest Two Guys man. Movie night was The Naked Gun 2½ - The Smell of Fear, watch Two Guys man. Two bowls of Costco popcorn were consumed, ingest Two Guys man. The remaining green grapes were then consumed, then ingest Two Guys man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man. Wednesday, we must retrieve Mama T-B.'s taxes, gold-retriever we man man. We must still off-clean the other half of our desk, sure to find our tax fodder there man. And that was/is our thrilling Tuesday, report we man.

There's strength, and certainly solace, in numbers. Sympathy and empathy to all here. Trust that progress WILL happen.

Very real sign that I saw posted in the back of a motel in Iowa: "Please do not throw your cigarette butts on the ground. The squirrels come out at night to smoke them. And we are trying to get them to quit."

Prayers.

Congrats -- we're expecting a full report.

Gracias, mam ma'am. Perhaps, si mam ma'am, but tougher affording them, $i and $igh mam ma'am. P-Math error precised, see and si and mam ma'am.

Holy mackerel. What's everyone's chief hobby there -- alternating show-shoveling with dying of boredom?

Scintillating Monday repartee, yawn man. ------- Thrilling Monday report, see man: Breakfasted/skoolbused Mini-B., groggy Two Guys man. Siesta #1 partially restful, doze we man. Lunch was 2 turkey-&-Swiss sandwiches, ingest we man. Got Uncle T-B.'s new Many-year CD funded, F$WM. Off-cleared half of our desk, stuff not sliding off piles onto keyboard now man. Decided against visiting ES, priorities man. Siesta #2 too short, truncated zzz we man. We had promised Mini-B. a trip to Costco to seek baggy sweatpants, promise we man. No pants, but found Many (2+2) nice t-shirts at $1 Manyzen each, not bad for retail man. Also got Mini-B. onebag of chocolate-covered almonds, keep us and our A1c away from them man. Din-din was at Costco, convenient man. We consumed the hot dog + Coke Zero, ingest we man. Mini-B. consumed the "chicken bake," ingest wee man. Went to Burlington to look for sweatpants, proximal man. Mini-B. tried on half-a-Manyzen pairs that weren't baggy enough, discouraged wee man man. We cheered him by buying him a Many-pack ([2x2x2]-pack) of socks, mollified wee man man. Mini-B. negative toward reasonably priced places, uneducated wee man man. He insisted that we go to Hollister, impending $en$e of doom we man. He found 2 baggy sweatpants that cost $Many -- si man, $Many -- each, outrageous man. We softened the hit by signing up for their list* for a $Many discount, OK but still paltry man. *from which we have immediately unsubscribed, forget spam we man We still paid $Many, outrageous man. Went from there to PacSun, Mini-B. wanted t-shirts man. Each t-shirt cost $Many -- si man, $Many -- outrageous man. Too much even at buy one get one half-off, outrageous man. Overall, we spent $Many ($2x2x2x2x2x2x2x2 - [2x2x2x2 + 2+2+2]) -- si man, $Many ($2x2x2x2x2x2x2x2 - [2x2x2x2 + 2+2+2]) -- early grave we man. Manyagers are expensive and have no sense of money or value, si and no man!!!!! How can we educate him that off-price stores are the maximum that one should spend at, huh man? How can we educate him that thrift stores, with patience, yield the very best, huh man? Manyagers are expensive, si and man!!! We informed Mini-B. that this profligate financial output merits a movie night every night this week, hoamwurk permitting man. Movie night was The Naked Guh, from the Files of Police Squad!, hilariously watch Two Guys man. Many (2+2) bowls of Costco popcorn were consumed, ingest Two Guys man. After that, a bunch of red grapes was consumed, further ingest Two Guys man. After that, half a large bag of green grapes were consumed, further ingest Two Guys man. After that, several handfuls of chocolate-covered almonds were consumed, finally ingest Two Guys and hose A1c we man man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man. Must return CPA's call re Mama T-B.'s taxes on Tuesday, hope it's something simple we man. Must work on our taxes, clean other half of desk first we man. And that was/is our thrilling Monday, report we man.

Garden spot of the tropical Yukon.

The waiting sucks. Have faith that progress WILL occur.

These AI things are worst than infuriating -- enraging is more like it. Sorry about that, and keep us informed.

Awfully weird that neither the Mossad nor CIA knows where he is. Might he be dead, and the IRGC is running things in his name? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Where's Mojtaba? Intelligence Agencies Stumped Over Whereabouts of 'Cardboard Ayatollah' He's supposedly in charge of the Islamic Republic of Iran after the U.S.-Israel airstrikes of Operation Epic Fury/Operation Roaring Lion wiped out former Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei and virtually the entire command structure of Iran. His name is Mojtaba Khamenei, he's the son of the recently vaporized Ayatollah, and he was named the new Supreme Leader by the country's "Assembly of Experts" in early March. Reports indicate that he may be gay and that his father wasn't particularly impressed with his intellectual capacity. The question remains, however: is he even alive, and if so, where the hell is he? He has made no public appearances and his statements have only been read aloud by others, not delivered by he himself. [...] https://redstate.com/bobhoge/2026/03/22/wheres-mojtaba-intelligence-agencies-stumped-over-whereabouts-of-cardboard-ayatollah-n2200511

Thrilling Sunday report, see man: Overnight zzz pretty good, zzz we man. Finally finished backlog of newspapers, read we man. Casually went to Friday's ES on last day (Sunday), see what's left man. Before leaving, we warshered LL #1, domestic we man. The ES items that we'd eyed had been sold to the customer just before us, man. "You zzz, you lose," sigh man. Groceried for last Two Guys Week items, diligent we man. We were able to restock our hoard of Powerade Zero grape, Many bottles available man. Breakfast/lunch/din-din (at Many p.m.) was TG, ingest we man. A siesta was taken, decent zzz we man. Both LLs were ultimately vanquished, victorious we man. AFV was watched, enjoy we man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. brought Mini-B., start of Two Guys Week man. Out-pigged on far too much junk food, overingest we man. Actually dished the warsher on scheduled day, must de-dish soon we man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man. Might check out the last-day ES warehouse sale on Monday, perhaps see we man. Must start on our taxes, time wasting man. And that was/is our thrilling Sunday, report we man.