TBoneTX

Oil Tanker Slips Anonymously Through Strait Of Hormuz By Adding Fake Nose And Mustache MIDDLE EAST — An oil tanker has managed to slip through the Strait of Hormuz completely undetected after donning a giant fake nose and mustache. The tanker, known as the Delta Magnus, nonchalantly floated in disguise past both the Iranian and American blockades, leaving both sides none the wiser. Intelligence reports indicate that [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/oil-tanker-slips-anonymously-through-strait-of-hormuz-by-adding-fake-nose-and-mustache

Mali is hosed. Not good for West Africa. At all. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We Warned This Might Happen: Al-Qaeda's Long-Forecasted Assault on Mali On Saturday, April 25, 2026, the world awoke to a nightmare that seasoned observers of the Sahel had been forecasting for years. Fighters from Jama’at Nusrat al-Islam wal-Muslimin (JNIM), the al-Qaeda-linked umbrella group operating across West Africa, launched a coordinated nationwide assault on Mali. Striking before dawn, they hit Bamako's Modibo Keïta International Airport, the main military base at Kati, the home of Defense Minister Sadio Camara, and cities including Mopti, Gao, and Kidal. JNIM's longtime tactical partners, the Tuareg separatists of the Azawad Liberation Front (FLA), simultaneously moved on northern strongholds, reportedly seizing much of Kidal and lowering the Malian flag. By midday, the U.S. Embassy had ordered citizens to shelter in place. The airport was closed and a three-day curfew announced. Russian Africa Corps mercenaries — who had replaced French and UN forces — were dragged into firefights alongside the Malian army. Mali Defence Minister Sadio Camara was killed in an attack on his residence. While government spokespeople insisted the situation was "under control," social media flooded with images of jihadist fighters parading through captured military bases and FLA fighters raising their flag over the north. A Malian air force Mi-35 was reportedly shot down in Gao. Whether Bamako survives this offensive, falls in the coming days, or descends into a prolonged siege, one thing is now beyond dispute: the warnings about Mali were not exaggerated. They were, if anything, understated. [...] https://pjmedia.com/charles-jacobs-and-uzay-bulut/2026/05/10/we-warned-this-might-happen-al-qaedas-long-forecast-assault-on-mali-n4952709

Thrilling (?) Sunday report, see man: Most of the day did not go well at all, no man. We awoke before alarm, man. We got Mini-B. to dislodge his embedded carcass, grouchy wee man man. We began warshering Mini-B.'s laundry, timing crucial man. We were frantically readying for M.'s Day lunch when Mama T-B. called, aysheep senior she man man. A readily correctable situation became a crisis, man. We had to get her off the phone, not easy man. We were ordered to see her after lunch, mandatory man. Retrieved ex-Mrs.-T-B. at appointed time, minor miracle man. We told Mini-B. where she & we had agreed, without discussion, to go, si man. We pulled into the parking lot, si man. Mini-B. pitched a holy fit, objecting wee man. He said that it was no place to go, no man. He said that we were cheap, true but we were still paying for everything man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. let him talk and then gave in to him, man. (He surely would've ruined everything had we gainsaid him, sigh man.) We reversed course and T-B.-mobiled far in other direction, traffic man. Fortunately early enough to be seated without waiting, so there's that man. During this commute, ex-Mrs.-T-B. confirmed what she had teased us with, never sure with her man. She has a new Rojo, si man. She met him on one of her cruises, si man. He's a gringo, an engineer, our height, and with our hair, si man. He lives even farther away than did the original Rojo, 😕 man. We do not know his name yet, no man. Therefore, and independently regardless, we shall call him the Nuevo Rojo, NR new Rojo man. [Pause while Bro G begins drinking immediately & heavily, pause we man.] At new restaurant, ex-Mrs.-T-B. had a salad that she liked, so there's that man. Mini-B. had lemon-crusted chicken tenders that he didn't object to, OK man. We had ghastly fried fish, greasy as hell man. This was breakfast/lunch/din-din for us, that kind of day man. Total bill + tip was $Many -- si man, $Many -- versus first choice that everyone would have liked, man. Mini-B. was much calmer afterward, tail wagging dog man. Deposited ex-Mrs.-T-B. at her casa, si man. Deposited Mini-B. at our casa, si man. Told Mini-B. to get on his skool hoamwurk and complete it, dictatorial we man. Hurriedly baked Mini-B.'s laundry, timing crucial man. Hurriedly T-B.-mobiled to pharmacy to get Mama T-B.'s Rx, allegedly ready man. We arrived Many (2+2+2) minutes before pharmacy closed for lunch, awful time man. Reluctantly picked out eyedrops that even we wouldn't care to use, no glycerin formula anywhere man. Pharmacist had no record of Rx, no man. Pharmacist researched, si man. Doc had neglected to get Prior Authorization, can't put on Medicare plan man. Cash price not bad but we knew that Mama T-B. would scream, si man. We used 2 coupons on Mama T-B.'s eyedrops, F$WM. Hurriedly T-B.-mobiled to Mama T-B., sure to get yelled at we man. Precisely one parking space at facility, M.'s Day man. Knocked & knocked & knocked on Mama T-B.'s door, mandatory procedure man. No answer till Many'th knock, OK man. Mama T-B. had been zzz-ing, groggy senior she man man. We had to explain what we had precisely Many (2+2) -- si man, Many (2+2) -- times in full, man. As Many00% expected, Mama T-B. found fault with everything, sigh man. She ranted and raved and yelled and objected to the cash price for her priority Rx, man. She couldn't decide where (or whether) to caddy them, we finally did something ourself man. She beefed and griped about everything the whole time, sigh man. She demanded details about the lunch, tell tale in full twice we man. She yelled at us for letting Mini-B. pull our strings, what else could we have done man. We did not tell her about the NR, no man. We finally exited after nearly an hour, totally frazzled we man. T-B.-mobile was running on fumes, Costco Gas on a weekend man. Made it back to casa, exhausted we man. Serviced demanding miu, It's Time To Service Us Daddy miu man. Mini-B. had actually kept his hoamwurk promise, imagine that man. Told Mini-B. that we'd fold his LL and try to siesta, si man. He was to put his laundry away and return basket to us, mandatory man. Siesta not completed for full <1 hour but relaxed us a bit, semi-zzz we man. Mini-B. had actually followed directions, amazing man. Mini-B. willingly (!?) helped to change the beds, crucial help man. Ex-Mrs.-T-B. was erranding and told us to deliver Mini-B. anytime, si man. Mini-B. stayed and actually watched most of AFV with us, that's rare man. He also changed batteries in miu's floor toy, proficient wee man man. We divested ourself of Mini-B. later than usual, end of Two Guys week man. Finished other 2 LLs, domestic we man. Considered but abandoned idea of dishing the warsher, do it Monday man. Mama T-B. phoned late to say that her regular pills had arrived, including the above Rx, man. We will have to see her Monday or Tuesday at latest to deal with these, this is like a broken record man. No party with the rubias tonight or probably ever, no cavort we man. We will probably be awakened between 1 and Many a.m. by loud thunderstorms, oh joy man. No specific plans for Monday besides above, how could there possibly be any man. And that was/is our thrilling (?) Sunday, report we man.

It is again Sunday, and again time for our Official Weekly VAWA-Thread Joke: =========================================== THOUGHTS ABOUT ANIMALS If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think was in charge? Why do flamingos stand on one leg? If they pulled up the other leg, they'd fall. Why do elephants get kicked out of the pool? Because they drop their trunks. Dressed the dog as a cat for Halloween. Now he won't come when I call him.

Thread is moved from the K-1 Process forum to General Immigration Discussion.

Translation: AWFLs.

Weird: Epstein Suicide Note Printed On Hillary Clinton's Personal Stationery U.S. — A federal judge ordered the release of Jeffrey Epstein's purported suicide note, which oddly appears to have been written on Hillary Clinton's personal stationery. According to sources close to the investigation, the stationery was discovered neatly folded on Epstein's bed and [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/weird-epstein-suicide-note-printed-on-hillary-clintons-personal-stationery

Iran Seizes a Tanker and Suffers New Problem - What's Hilarious Is Who That Cargo Belongs To [...] This may be one of the funniest things the Iranians have done so far. So it appears that either they [...] https://redstate.com/nick-arama/2026/05/08/irans-latest-actions-show-how-desperate-they-are-n2202158

Faint Meow Leads to a Miraculous, Post-Tornado Kitten Rescue in Mississippi With all the trouble in the world, war, pestilence, oppression, poverty, disease, Democrats, it's nice to see something come across once in a while that makes one feel unambiguously good. This is one of those; following the dreadful tornadoes that did so much damage to the great state of Mississippi, one man was picking through the wreckage, and was alerted to the presence of a tiny survivor by an equally tiny meow. [...] https://redstate.com/wardclark/2026/05/09/faint-meow-leads-to-miracle-mississippi-post-tornado-kitten-rescue-n2202167

The U.K. Royal Navy is royally screwed, as is Britain The British Royal Navy reportedly has had another 'crippled' vessel withdrawn, leaving just five active frigates to defend Britain. Five? Frigates? Well, that should be enough to fend off Russia and or China. Not. Five effing frigates? That isn't neglect. It is planned obsolescence. Civilizational suicide. "How the mighty have fallen" doesn't begin to describe the collapse of Britain. From the largest, best, and most feared navy in the world to one that would fit in a large outdoor swimming pool. That's what happens when a nation prioritizes welfare and illegal immigration over its continued existence. I guess "Rule Brittania" is over. Perhaps they could [...] https://www.americanthinker.com/blog/2026/05/the_u_k_royal_navy_is_royally_screwed_as_is_britain.html

Thrilling Saturday report, see man: Actually zzz'd the entire night, bless the great Sky-Chimp we man. We felt no pressure to search for GSs even though many loomed, weekly streak already intact man. We did relaxing casa stuff, newspaper etc. man. Then the doorbell rang, USPS dude man. We had to sign for a certified letter, certifiably so man. It turned out to be something about Estranged Aunt T-B.'s estate, try to dun us man. We composed and mailed a disclaimer of personal representation et al. et al., shut the door on THAT man. Let the lawyers waste their time while leaving us alone, si man. Per the above + Mini-B.'s sloth, we didn't leave the casa until almost half-past 2 p.m., bright & early man. Mailed letter at P.O., made the final dispatch man. Took Mini-B. to visit Mama T-B., delighted senior she man man*. *and this obviates visiting on actual Mother's Day, no parking to be found in smallish lot man Took Mini-B. to Dollar-Plus-Half-of-Half-a-Dollar Tree to buy M.'s Day cards, cheap yet effective F$WM. Lunched/din-dinned at Chick-fil-A, long time for either of Two Guys man. Mini-B. had the #1 combo meal, ingest wee man. We had the Manyzen chicken nuggets, ingest we man. We could've gotten 2 full sit-down Mexican din-dins for about the same price, man. Back at casa, Mini-B. gamed with amigo, game wee man + wee man man. We serviced demanding miu, You're Back Barely In Time Daddy miu man. We could have siesta'd but didn't, 🤯 man. We instead reviewed lawyer stuff, satisfied with our parrying effort we man. Mini-B. wanted movie night, comply we man. Watched The Do-Over, watch Two Guys man. Many (2+2) bowls of Costco popcorn were consumed, ingest Two Guys man. This tallies to Many (2x2x2x2 +2) for the week, impressive final total man. No party with the rubias tonight, no cavort we man. Must arise earlier than preferred on Sunday, start LLs and lunch with ex-Mrs.-T-B. Two Guys man. And that was/is our thrilling Saturday, report we man.

We feel like a real person, si and whee man! She undergoes a lot of surgical procedures herself, so our need sometimes clashes with her availability, sigh man. Care to specify, huh man? We agree with this, si man. We were disturbed that Sam's refrigerates some items that Costco freezes, puts pressure on using them man. But we conclude that it's OK to freeze previously fridged-only stuff in most instances, relief man. We will take ex-Mrs.-T-B. & Mini-B. to lunch on Sunday, si man. She is a good if obssessive/aysheep mommy, si man. And she's on yet another destined-for-failure diet, man. That's because she's a rubia, si and see and "bonk: man!

Violent physical exercise can take some of the sting out of this.

If you're lucky, it's what kidd0o suggests. If it was rejected for more ominous reasons (e.g., fraudulent findings or suspicions), not good. Wait to find out, or consult your U.S. Congressman's immigration liaison.

We all have one-track minds?