DoodBoy

Yes, i understand but we were in contact daily thru chat n hourly calls on weekends. I didn't hold back, she was young n immature (in begining i felt i married a 10 yr old) but then i realized look we commited,she is innocent, ill teach her everything.. i became her fast-friend altho my cuzins warned me NOT to get too friendly, keep some reserveness)my view was, that she is gonna leave all her family behind to new world, i wanted to put her at ease n gave her all the love n attention. We would sometimes even talk for hours on weekend. SO what changed is when i asked her to become a lil responsible, now that she is married, to not stay late till 5-6am daily watching tiktok n being online, its unhealthy n just not a healthy lifestyle.I even asked inlaws the same but this was their ''daily routine'' n they got offended for me trying to suggest something healthy.. her mom would constantly put up sad/sarcastic urdu quotes on whatsapp, so her relatives can be guilty, her young daughter did same n just so strange. I would ask MIL to stop this negative behavior cuz its effecting my young wife, who is copying her n broadcasting sad n hurtful status msgs, giving people wrong impressions.. .. if they have any problems, tell me, i would solve em all.. but nope.. they didnt listen n continued.. they loved watching turkish soap operas with all the ''fake love''romanticism teaching girls that one day romeo will bump into them n life is better with finding LOVE.. n pkstani dramas injecting poision as well with affairs n divorces being normalized n all heroin characters are negative lately(feministic).. so the middle class women have nothing to do but watch n absorb these toxic material which i feel is starting to effect their minds and actions ANyways, sorry i got into rant mode, anytime i reminded of them, i lose track of things.. you took a big risk leaving your job to stay in PK. I mean hindsight, i didn't know things would go this bad specially i did nothing wrong to be blocked n ignored for last 2+yrs i dunno what got into her, who was influencing her, she became a different person.. anyways, Allah saved me from a bad woman. I take it positively. Everyone goes through tests in life, so this was mine. It is all good, alhamdulilah, everything happens for a good reason. I am satisfied w/ my life i did the best i could n put my trust in Allah to do the rest. So Destiny is written, we just have to play our part n make sure to do the right things, results in his hands.

@Machinecorpse62 hey congrats on uniting with the 2nd one. So you saying, you went through a breakup of marriage having waited 4 yrs n then remarried in PK and waited another 4 yrs? meaning you waited around 7-8 yrs to get 2nd wife from PK into USA? that is some mighty patience you have, if thats the case. For me, no point going back to PK, its a mess, hard to trust people when our own khaala's daughter can do this to us so imagine others. So, i have no choice left but to go in streets of new york n look for a niqabi/hijaabi n approach them respectfully for their wali's number ( they are usually bengalis n arabs)...its tough likely 90% rejection rate but its whats left. To find a diamond one has to go thru dirt. Whatever is written, shall come to pass. Otherday at tacobell, i come across a pkstani girl she seemed attractive but the way she was dressed (spandex) i was like, ahh No, thats a redflag. Living in US, its takes courage for women to dress modest n not expose themselves so cheaply like i see many here. Even the hijabis with tight jeans? social justice warriors/feminist/male friends, high5iving etc... So many redflags, very hard to find a good lady these days. So niqabis are my first choice.. Someone who fears their lord n has some hawa left in them.. any woman who listens to the likes of farhat hashmi, is a jannati woman, a treasure to be had. So its a lil tough to find these gems/pearls.

thx for the positive vibes, ahh its not that they were greedy. Actually, wife was young and immature. So her cousin filled her head with was-was and turned her against me in order to seduce her n she fell for it. So they both plotted to run away.. This girl was so innocent n sweet in 3 yrs ago, but social media n crazy pk soap operas on affairs/divorce topic just groomed her into this selfish person over yrs. She was a selfless person but i guess, people can change w/ time. It's a test from Allah indeed...so i wouldn't say they were greedy.. its just they felt like i abandoned her.. So young people these days, have no patience, this is the tiktok generation being groomed to swipe to the next video n next video... so to them now human relationships are like that tiktok video, if not fulfilling enuff, swipe n move to the next one.. n next one.. Patience is no more.. So, deep down i can understand whats happening.. all we can do is watch it happen, you cant force someone to change or make them understand things.. in end one has to accept the fate n carry on, despite the wounds. I am only child of elderly parents, whose only dream left was to see me married n play with grandkids. I did all i could, patiently waited n waited only to see her slip further away from me.. Its a test for us all. May Allah accept our efforts.

hello everyone, its been a while since i checked up on interviews. Looks like progress has been made for many. Congrats. Unfortunately, it seems my wife has decided to not go to interview and infact wanting to end marriage as well. So over 3+yrs of wait, all the efforts, seems to go down the drain. I am going to blame the lengthy visa process for this breakup. The family of wife was TIRED of waiting so long and felt they couldn't wait any longer and relationship strained with them deciding to end the marriage. My wife interview is this week. If she doesn't show up? what happens? anyone know.. Also is it possible that i can contact NVC n tell them my story and request that they give me some break. Like if i want to marry someone else from PK. That i dont have to wait another 3-4 yrs like last time.. is there room for this? i can no longer wait 3yrs to start family. My father is devastated by this.. we are heart broken, we did all we can from our end but this lengthy process was eating up wife's family as they had their relatives made their lives living hell n filled ears of distrust and its looks like its over.. Any advice for me, can i request NVC, will they give me a chance n speed up my case for my future wife. It will be very difficult for me to marry in USA now given now after having to wait 4 yrs, i'll be 40yr old n it's difficult to find good god fearing girls in USA.. Its why we opted for PK. It is unfair, being a US citizen i had to wait this long.. i don't wanna say my life is ruined because i have faith in God n losing hope is a sin. It's just, i feel like i've been robbed by this crazy process to get my wife to be with me to start life. I hope no one goes through what i been through for last few years. Thanks,