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When my husband had his oath ceremony there were some people in suits and some people in t-shirts. There was a big range. My husband wore khakis and a long sleeve henley type shirt.

Hi - not my case, my husband already here and has citizenship. Another couple I know from online - petitioner filed I-130 for spouse October 2022. Petitioner and beneficiary got into big argument, and she sent letter via USPS 8/16/23 to withdraw the petition. Next day, her and beneficiary made up and she was remorseful of having sent letter. Went to immigration attorney who advised her to write another letter withdrawing the first one. Wrote letter and uploaded it in the "documents" section of their case on 8/27/23 indicating that she had previously sent letter through the mail withdrawing their petition but wanted to cancel that. On 9/1/23 their case changed to "Active Review" and was then approved by USCIS same day. After she wrote the first letter, my advice to her had been to wait and when that letter was acknowledged, to re-file. What could the situation be now? If USCIS has NOT seen the first letter, can they still cancel the petition now that it's technically en route to NVC? Is it possible that they were "actively reviewing" her case BECAUSE they had received the letter and noticed the second one as well? Should they just proceed with NVC and hope for the best?

So in the above set of instructions - you are between 3 and 4. You have to complete the I-824 and pay the fees as others have said. How did you originally submit your case - online or by mail? The situation are likely in is that you on the I-130 form, in part 4 - you would have answered BOTH 61 a/b AND 62 a/b/c. If you have a copy of your submission (I know when you submit online they usually send you a .pdf?) and you DID NOT check both of the boxes, then you could reach out and indicate that USCIS made an error. I do know others where they DID NOT check both of these boxes and were successful in NOT filing the I-824 and had their case move on to the NVC. If you did in fact, answer both of those, then you would have to file it as others have indicated.

when the passport is "sent away: for the visa it's maybe gone for a week or two. You wouldn't plan on then leaving the country on a different passport and then returning a week later to get the passport with the visa in it?

You don't apply for either - you just submit off the I-130 for your spouse -- the visa you get is based on the length of marriage when your spouse enters the US. I hope you haven't waited all this time thinking it was based on length of marriage at time of petition!