MyNigerianKING

Good morning everyone I don’t know how to reply to each one’s comment . But I want to say thank you ! you guys have some good advice that you have added and I appreciate you all and I pray that GOD would sustain all marriages especially those that took the time to comment. I realized I’m not in love but I love my husband I’m a bit older so my perspective on things have changed a lot. The main thing too is never look to a person to make you happy , eventually they will fail you. Adjust and grow within yourself , learn to compromise and understand the saying about a happy wife equals a happy life is not true grit, both people must seek true happiness that only GOD can give and you must choose to accept the persona and all their flaws and values. Know your role women because you have a significant one ! After all, as someone in one of the comments said “It’s who you chose”🥰😘

Again, I understand everyone is different but I have been swooned by the man as I see all the women are. I’m just saying take time out to understand it’s NOT ABOUT LOVE ENTIRELY for them. American women we want what our culture has portrayed as being a good man. BUT please mam take your head out the clouds for just a moment , ask him tough questions, what are his goals and how do you fit into them once he arrives? Think about what you think you can depend on him now for will that change when he arrives? What is his love language and what is yours? Does he know what yours is? Is he willing to be the same way when he arrives? What do you expect from him? Is he a minimalist and if so how I’ll that play into him meeting any household needs that you expect a man to do? The expectation if not effectively communicated between the two BEFORE he arrives will devastate you. If it wasn’t for me having a relationship with GOD I would divorce. Also, if you are paying for everything when you go travel please understand ! Do it not expecting anything in return because once he is making more money than he has ever made in his life you will see right where you fit in and I PRAY it’s what you expected but just in case it’s not , as the woman you have to submit and compromise if you want your marriage to last. I WANT TO BRING AWARENESS TO AMERICAN WOMEN because our culture have the toughest time adjusting to the headship of our husbands.

To all women marrying abroad. Please understand the reality, when you travel to the other country to see your husband of course it will be laid on thick for you because if they aren’t contributing anything in the financial process the goal is TO GET TO AMERICA. You will never be the only reason why they want to come here. You may be part but not the only reason , in their mind they want to get money to take care of their family back in Africa. They think all Americans are rich and don’t want to spend their money. I am still with my husband he is a hard worker but he is nothing like I thought he would be towards me . If I can give you any advice have every conversation possible that you can think of before he arrives to the USA so you can see where his mind and heart is with his goals when he arrives to the USA. I would advise that you highly consider what choice you are making before you start the process. I know all men are not the same BUT understand you are marrying a culture as well as a person. If you can don’t rush and get married and make him pay for things that the IR1 Process calls for.