this is for girls with an american fiance

[B'sA 0]

Girls,I need to vent now!

If any of you have had a similar situation, please share!

I'm talking about how we get judged by people who don't really know us, but have the feeling we're hunting.

I spent a hole summer with my fiance and i got really close to some of his friends and his family really likes me, but there is people who are trying to make him think that getting married to me is a mistake. He don't give a s.....t on all those"advisers", but that is pissing me off.

And i wonder is it a hole life i'm going to be disrespected by b...ches who are going to think i'm week for not having attitude with my husbend,i'm week if i'm not acting like a b...ch?

have you been disrespected like this ever? How do you handle.

I mean, as long as i don't meet these certain persons i'm cool, but it's enough to remember about them and i get all irritated.

That's not fare.

[Cassie 8]

Honestly, I wouldn't let these "advisors" bother you. All you need to worry about is how your fiance feels -- and it seems like he doesn't give a ####### what they think. Why give them that kind of control over your emotions? Not worth your time

[KimandRuss 0]

I agree. Don't waste your energy.

Most people you meet will not be so arrogant...or ignorant. The ones that are obviously have their own demons to deal with.

Best of luck to you

[terryn 0]

Girls,I need to vent now!

If any of you have had a similar situation, please share!

I'm talking about how we get judged by people who don't really know us, but have the feeling we're hunting.

I spent a hole summer with my fiance and i got really close to some of his friends and his family really likes me, but there is people who are trying to make him think that getting married to me is a mistake. He don't give a s.....t on all those"advisers", but that is pissing me off.

And i wonder is it a hole life i'm going to be disrespected by b...ches who are going to think i'm week for not having attitude with my husbend,i'm week if i'm not acting like a b...ch?

have you been disrespected like this ever? How do you handle.

I mean, as long as i don't meet these certain persons i'm cool, but it's enough to remember about them and i get all irritated.

That's not fare.

HOW ABOUT A GIRL WITH A SOUTH AFRICAN FIANCEE, all I hear from my now EX FRIENDS, is that he only wants to marry you to get his GREEN CARD...You are giving him the gift of the UNITED STAES..........I can not stand it any longer, I left New York in November and I am waiting in South Africa with him till the K1 visa goes thru and I will never speak to those so called friends, even one girl was going to be my Maid of Honor....... People are just rotten all over and you have to just forget about them and go on with your life...Good Luck and Best wishes

Terry

[B'sA 0]

HOW ABOUT A GIRL WITH A SOUTH AFRICAN FIANCEE, all I hear from my now EX FRIENDS, is that he only wants to marry you to get his GREEN CARD...You are giving him the gift of the UNITED STAES..........I can not stand it any longer, I left New York in November and I am waiting in South Africa with him till the K1 visa goes thru and I will never speak to those so called friends, even one girl was going to be my Maid of Honor....... People are just rotten all over and you have to just forget about them and go on with your life...Good Luck and Best wishes

Terry

Thanks for sharing!

I'm sorry, that's just sad...when people think they know it all.

Much luck to you too.

[mox 298]

Speaking as an American male marrying a "Russian bride," lemme tell ya a few things about being judged.

Seriously though, it's water off a duck's back. You said your fiance doesn't let it bother him...I'd follow his lead. Whoever is judging you, it's their problem. It's not your problem. Enjoy your life with your fiance.

[Donna A 4]

people are just people everywhere in the world. one person will agree and one wont. its just that way. nothing u can do about it except live ur live and be happy and not care what they think. some people are just closed minded and others open.

it happens everywhere. even when i was engaged to my husband my mother in law found me beautiful...his sister told him im not beautiful enough for him. 2 people 2 different opinions. just the way it is. do i care his sister didnt find me beautiful...no. i got my prize anyway and thats what matters.

[Amanda+Stephen 0]

The only opinions and thoughts that matter are the two of yours. I'm the USC and I've caught flack from extended family and friends. I don't sweat it. He and I are happy and what everyone else thinks really doesn't weigh into our daily lives.

Some people don't know how to be anything other than a critic, judge, commentator, etc. Focus on the two of you, not all the other opinions floating around!

[msu17 0]

There are definitly always those that are stupid enough and arrogant enough to feel they are entitled to make judgments on others lives without knowing the situation. It seems like that is especially true when it comes to international relationships. True, there are those that take advantage of the situation (both USC and the foreign spouse) and we do have a lot more on the line when marrying than a lot of couples, so I would expect close friends and family to be a bit concerned until they get to know the SO and the relationship, but I honestly don't know why so many outsiders feel the need to butt in. Thankfully, there are lots of people in the US that are willing to get to know you before they judge, so just try to find those people and avoid the nosey, irritating arrogant self-rightous individuals who feel they know you and your relationship better than you do.

[Southern_Canadian 0]

When Eric and I first started talking and metting up, a few girls that liked him, would tell him that I was only using him to become an American. He obviously didn't believe them and I really think it is funny. Whyyyy would I use someone to get my Green Card?!?! I lovee my family, friends and life in Canada. Metting Eric and falling in love with him was nottt what I ever thought would happen. (But I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy that it did) I just don't let their comments bother me.

So, really I say forget those people who have nothing good to say.

[Dave+Rose 0]

Girls,I need to vent now!

If any of you have had a similar situation, please share!

I'm talking about how we get judged by people who don't really know us, but have the feeling we're hunting.

I spent a hole summer with my fiance and i got really close to some of his friends and his family really likes me, but there is people who are trying to make him think that getting married to me is a mistake. He don't give a s.....t on all those"advisers", but that is pissing me off.

And i wonder is it a hole life i'm going to be disrespected by b...ches who are going to think i'm week for not having attitude with my husbend,i'm week if i'm not acting like a b...ch?

have you been disrespected like this ever? How do you handle.

I mean, as long as i don't meet these certain persons i'm cool, but it's enough to remember about them and i get all irritated.

That's not fare.

I understand where you are coming from. I have not experienced the same but too many of my fellow K1 applicants have gone through the same judgment and interpretation. Well, you don't owe them any explanation, as long as your fiance loves you and supports you all through out. Just my 2 cent advise, just shrug it off, at the end of the day its you that is being held by your fiance not them most of the time, people throw stones to trees filled with fruits, same thing with us...we are luckier and happier so others who are miserable with their own demons want a company...cheer up, there are so much more to enjoy with your fiance!!!

[panamania79 2]

Girls,I need to vent now!

If any of you have had a similar situation, please share!

I'm talking about how we get judged by people who don't really know us, but have the feeling we're hunting.

I spent a hole summer with my fiance and i got really close to some of his friends and his family really likes me, but there is people who are trying to make him think that getting married to me is a mistake. He don't give a s.....t on all those"advisers", but that is pissing me off.

And i wonder is it a hole life i'm going to be disrespected by b...ches who are going to think i'm week for not having attitude with my husbend,i'm week if i'm not acting like a b...ch?

have you been disrespected like this ever? How do you handle.

I mean, as long as i don't meet these certain persons i'm cool, but it's enough to remember about them and i get all irritated.

That's not fare.

Advisors,as you call them will be around no matter what.I had my family,friends,and my fiance's nosy 2-faced family.I just decided to ignore them all and everything is okay now.You should do the same.

[Nanusia & Lukaszek 0]

I think everyone on VJ can somehow relate to this, and its probably because our relationships are international. Why in this day & age, is it a shock that you are dating or going to marry someone from a different country is beyond my comprehension. There are some GC scams, and they automatically think you could be at risk for the same. To me its a load of #######

Try to ignore those negative people, get them out of your life, and focus on the positive, you & your fiance.

[Eric-Pris 1,606]

Yes, I agree with what you said. I am an American man, and I have a foreign fiancee and we are doing the K-1 visa. I know she feels uncomfortable that people think of her as a gold digger, and that she's using me to come to the US, which couldn't be any further from the truth. Nobody has, or will in the future, disrespect her in front of me, because they know how I'll react, but I know they talk behind our backs.

American women don't like foreign women actually treating a man with respect and being good wives. They put tgem down for it. They don't want men to know what it's like to have an respectful wife. They want to be able to control men and be bitches and have all the power. Pay not attention to it, they're just angry and jealous that an American man would choose a foreigner over them.

[mnieto 2]

...... most of the time, people throw stones to trees filled with fruits....

...well said, I couldn't agree more!