Merill Lynch employee takes a dump on bathroom floor and smeared his feces all over the floor

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

From dealbreaker.com:

Earlier this afternoon, CNBC’s Charlie Gasparino reported that some guy in Merrill Lynch’s fixed income research group had “inappropriately relieved” himself in protest of the downsizing of his bonus. Merrill has officially explained that this was simply an unfortunate accident, and then the bank turned red and scurried to the other side of the room.

We’ve been digging into this story because the way it’s told by the delicate souls at CNBC, it’s way to vague. What worse, the vagueness is giving rise to rumors that are totally untrue. It's fast becoming the Wall Street equivalent of an urban legends. Here’s what didn’t happen: a guy did not urinate on his desk because he was “pissed off.” The real story is so much worse.

In the first place, it wasn’t piss. It was #######. DealBreaker can confirm this much. After that the details get a bit fuzzy. The way we first heard it is that a guy took a dump in the rest room, stomped in it, and then dragged it all over the place by walking around with it on his shoes. Merrill’s story is that there was “an unfortunate accident” in one of the stalls—which we take to mean that some guy smeared his ###### all over the bathroom because how the Hell could you miss the toilet—and that another person inadvertently stepped in it and tracked it all over.

So now you know.

http://www.dealbreaker.com/2008/01/like_fe...me.php#comments

[no name 1]

From dealbreaker.com:

Earlier this afternoon, CNBC’s Charlie Gasparino reported that some guy in Merrill Lynch’s fixed income research group had “inappropriately relieved” himself in protest of the downsizing of his bonus. Merrill has officially explained that this was simply an unfortunate accident, and then the bank turned red and scurried to the other side of the room.

We’ve been digging into this story because the way it’s told by the delicate souls at CNBC, it’s way to vague. What worse, the vagueness is giving rise to rumors that are totally untrue. It's fast becoming the Wall Street equivalent of an urban legends. Here’s what didn’t happen: a guy did not urinate on his desk because he was “pissed off.” The real story is so much worse.

In the first place, it wasn’t piss. It was #######. DealBreaker can confirm this much. After that the details get a bit fuzzy. The way we first heard it is that a guy took a dump in the rest room, stomped in it, and then dragged it all over the place by walking around with it on his shoes. Merrill’s story is that there was “an unfortunate accident” in one of the stalls—which we take to mean that some guy smeared his ###### all over the bathroom because how the Hell could you miss the toilet—and that another person inadvertently stepped in it and tracked it all over.

So now you know.

http://www.dealbreaker.com/2008/01/like_fe...me.php#comments

yeah, he deserves a bonus.

[almaty 19]

damn..another one of thise types..i had several..who pissed on the floor and 3 in the last year..that did the same behavior..differnet companies,,,must be posted on the internet somewhere to do this at work if pissed at the company

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Update:

Merrill Lynch’s famous bull logo has taken on a new aspect now that nearly everyone on Wall Street knows the story about the “unfortunate accident” that led to an employees s h i t being spread all over the place. And we’re not talking about a CDO squared portfolio.

The incident took place on the nineteenth floor of Merrill’s headquarters in the World Financial Center, according to our sources. The floor houses the fixed income group. Bonuses for the group are said to have dropped substantially from last year, although the decline was not as bad as some expected. The more senior guys are said to be very upset at their compensation but associates are pleasantly surprised after having their expectations lowered so dramatically.

But there may be more to this story than just a bonus rage. The story has been widely discussed within Merrill itself, and the predominant belief there is that it wasn’t a dissatisfied fixed-income researcher who engaged in the fecal protest. Inside the bull pen, the word is that it was an equities guy who came over to the fixed-income department and “inappropriately relieved” himself. He was supposedly seeking revenge against fixed-income for credit-market losses that have affected bonuses across the firm.

The plot thickens.

http://www.dealbreaker.com/2008/01/the_onl...ts.php#comments

[Sheriff Uling 3]

He took the expression "getting dumped on" literally...

[Otto 83]

Whats the big deal? Sounds like any (every?) WalMart bathroom...

[Ban Hammer 13,349]

Whats the big deal? Sounds like any (every?) WalMart bathroom...

true

[Sprailenes 47]

He's not getting back at the people who cut his bonus...they aren't the ones who have to clean the bathroom. Some poor cleaning person who makes less than he does has to do it.

I'd hate to be that cleaning person.

[*julez* 124]

That guy has a sh!t attitude, no wonder his bonus was cut!

And true dat about Walmart bathrooms. So vile.

[Sprailenes 47]

pun intended?

[Amby 490]

Whats the big deal? Sounds like any (every?) WalMart bathroom...

ewwww wal mart bathrooms are scary. i had to pee one time while I was there and I walked in the bathroom and just walked right back out without doing my business. I couldn't do it

[Nagishkaw 510]

He's a real shoe-in.

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

If anyone's familiar with that that UK sitcom "Peep Show" - this is pure Mark Corrigan psychology.

[*julez* 124]

pun intended?

Oh, indeed!

He's not getting back at the people who cut his bonus...they aren't the ones who have to clean the bathroom. Some poor cleaning person who makes less than he does has to do it.

I'd hate to be that cleaning person.

They should give the cleaning staff this guy's bonus. Sorry, but this guy is a pig.