Having a baby

[Yaads 0]

Ok guys I have a question…well questions. I am not quite sure how to word it so bear with me.

How do you know when it’s the right time to have a baby? What things did you/do you want to have in place before you decide to have a baby? Do you/did you want a certain amount of money saved up, assets, certain job wage? What are those things? Do those things need to be in place before you decide to have a baby or do you decide to have a baby and then trust that those things will fall into place?

I am asking for personal opinions and experience…no right or wrong…just what is right for you.

Also for those that have had children…how much do they really cost? Is it doable on a “regular” income?

Thanks for any input/insight! It is greatly appreciated.

Jamie

[Fischkoepfin 1]

We're also considering the "when" question currently. We've heard from friends that there is no right right time. We want to make sure, however, that the baby isn't born into a very stressful period of our lives, and we want to have some financial stability. So, we're putting it off for another 6-9 months so that when the baby is born, I'm done with my dissertation and I ideally have a permanent job or at least a job that pays enough to maintain a family of 3 or 4 (I'm a twin gene carrier, which makes it even more difficult).

Having a job with health insurance would be a plus if you don't live in a state that offers free health care to children, but that's something we can't plan right now. Another consideration is that I'm going on 35 and feel it's high time to start having children before it is too late. Otherwise we'll probably wait another few years.

Everything else depends on how you want to raise your children and what you want out of life. I don't think you need a lot of money or assets, but a steady income. But then, I don't necessarily want my children to grow up in luxury.

[ariel_2005 0]

we just knew we want a baby soon and we had it

[Mand 1]

We used to say...we'll wait till I get a job, we'll wait till we've our own house and lots of others like that, but the truth is, the "right time" doesn't exist.

Oh and from reading the books...when the contractions are coming together and you're feeling the urge to push...that's when it's time to have the baby!!

[Cassie 8]

Seeing as I am currently on medication that causes birth defects, I have been warned repeatedly by my doctors to not get pregnant without consulting with them and changing my medication. So there will be some planning involved when we get to the point of deciding if/when we have children. We'd also like to be out of debt or nearly out of debt when we possibly add children to the mix. So it'll not happen for a few years.

But then again, we also have the adoption option, which adds another level of research/planning.

[MaryandMian 1]

I will say your heart will tell you when you want to have a baby. I know being in good housing is a must but you can never say it is ever the perfect timing. Kids are alot of work (I have two) and love them with all my heart. Expensive but everyday life is expensive. I can tell you that the rewards of my kids bring in my life outweigh any negatives.

Mary

[flipside 0]

We decided to wait at least 5-8 years after we get married to even have the discussion again.

We want to enjoy a life together for a while because it'll probably be 18 years after we have a baby until we have any peace!

[mandolinv 0]

We are talking about this right now. We talked about it before he was finally able to come over. We decided to live with each other for about 6 months before we even started because we wanted some "us" time and to get to know each other before hormones went on a rampage. But, we are continuously revisiting it and it will probably constantly be up for discussion until it actually happens. Good Luck!

[wally 0]

18 years? I wish!

If I was to do it again, I'd have started in my mid 20's...I had 3 and did not get a full night's sleep for 7 years straight.

Oh, and they cost me an arm, a leg and working on the other arm.

[joej 0]

I never planned on having any...oops. Yet I always new that if I did, I wanted to have my schooling done, own my house and have a great job. I did all eccept the great job. Yet, all the planning in the world cannot prepare you for it.

Ummmm 7 years without good sleep? Lets not scare them too much. It really depends on the child. Some sleep through the night at just a few months old.

Best Wishes

[Saddle Bronc 124]

For us, the answer is ASAP; both of us love children, and we're already in the attempting-to-conceive (the only barrier being my own clumsiness at it :lol: ) stage.

[faith 0]

Ok guys I have a question…well questions. I am not quite sure how to word it so bear with me.

How do you know when it’s the right time to have a baby? What things did you/do you want to have in place before you decide to have a baby? Do you/did you want a certain amount of money saved up, assets, certain job wage? What are those things? Do those things need to be in place before you decide to have a baby or do you decide to have a baby and then trust that those things will fall into place?

I am asking for personal opinions and experience…no right or wrong…just what is right for you.

Also for those that have had children…how much do they really cost? Is it doable on a “regular” income?

Thanks for any input/insight! It is greatly appreciated.

Jamie

There is no "perfect" or "right" time to have a baby. It all depends on each couple.

For us, it was simple. I already have 2 kids. They are 11 and 6. I'm 33. I didn't want to wait much longer to have another baby, as you get older it's riskier. We did not have any money saved up. We had a house that was big enough for all of us, but again I already have kids. At the time I got pregnant I was the only one with steady income. Now that's changed and he has the kick #ss job with good insurance. I've found in life, that most things just work out. You make any amount of money work because it's what you have to deal with.

How much do kids costs really? When they are babies you have diapers, formula if you can't/won't breastfeed, daycare if you plan on working. Once they become school aged it becomes a matter of food, clothing, sports, school, etc. There is no set cost. You set your limits and you go from there. As far as on a regular income.. what's a regular income to you isn't to someone else.

It's all about personal judgements..... you have to make that choice for yourself!

[Yaads 0]

Ok guys I have a question…well questions. I am not quite sure how to word it so bear with me.

How do you know when it’s the right time to have a baby? What things did you/do you want to have in place before you decide to have a baby? Do you/did you want a certain amount of money saved up, assets, certain job wage? What are those things? Do those things need to be in place before you decide to have a baby or do you decide to have a baby and then trust that those things will fall into place?

I am asking for personal opinions and experience…no right or wrong…just what is right for you.

Also for those that have had children…how much do they really cost? Is it doable on a “regular” income?

Thanks for any input/insight! It is greatly appreciated.

Jamie

There is no "perfect" or "right" time to have a baby. It all depends on each couple.

For us, it was simple. I already have 2 kids. They are 11 and 6. I'm 33. I didn't want to wait much longer to have another baby, as you get older it's riskier. We did not have any money saved up. We had a house that was big enough for all of us, but again I already have kids. At the time I got pregnant I was the only one with steady income. Now that's changed and he has the kick #ss job with good insurance. I've found in life, that most things just work out. You make any amount of money work because it's what you have to deal with.

How much do kids costs really? When they are babies you have diapers, formula if you can't/won't breastfeed, daycare if you plan on working. Once they become school aged it becomes a matter of food, clothing, sports, school, etc. There is no set cost. You set your limits and you go from there. As far as on a regular income.. what's a regular income to you isn't to someone else.

It's all about personal judgements..... you have to make that choice for yourself!

Very true

Thanks for all the advice/experience so far

[m_and_m20 0]

Personally, I really wanted to be out of debt. Me and my husband had decided that i wouldnt work if we had a baby, so trying to get out of debt was something that i really wanted to do, especially since we would be relying on one income. But, i got pregnant before any of that could happen, so now my goal is to plan out life on a major budget!

I was so against having a baby for the longest time, me and my husband would fight about it a lot too. but now that i had my lil oops im really getting more and more excited about having a baby.

[kc456 0]

The only thing I'd consider would be having adequate medical insurance. Without it, you could be spending lots and lots on pre-natal care, delivery, hospital stay, and pediatrics. I would not do it without insurance. Everything else is not as important.