Bob Barker Endorses New Line of Dog Condoms

[Ban Hammer 13,349]

LOS ANGELES - Game Show Host and crusader for pet puritanism, Bob Barker held a press conference yesterday announcing his endorsement of a line of canine condoms manufactured by Ralston Purina, called "Doggie Styles."

Said Mr. Barker, "After years of joylessly brow-beating people into spaying and neutering their animals, I had a revelation after hosing down some dogs doing it on my front lawn. To control the pet population, we're basically treating our furry little friends like criminals and castrating them just cause they wanna have a little fun.. Using 'Doggie Styles' is far more humane than neutering, 'cause sometimes Fido's like you and me. He just wants a piece of tail to spice up his day every once in awhile.î

"Doggie Styles," which claim to help prevent pregnancy in 95% of all doggie sexual encounters, will feature Bob Barker's likeness on the box and come in a wide range of sizes (from Chihuahua to Great Dane), as well as a variety of styles like: regular, ribbed, and "liver-flavored for her pleasure".

Ralston Purina has sunk many years and millions of research dollars into the field of dog contraceptive devices and settled upon the idea of a poochie prophylactic after early experiments with a Doggie IUD and Doggie Diaphragm proved less then successful.

"Doggie Styles" will be sold at pet shops and vending machines placed alongside dog runs in the next several weeks, but there already seems to be mounting negative reaction among some consumers.

Explained Purina Marketing Director Eric Wallen, the idea of dog condoms has tested through the roof, but the problem is, dogs don't really have opposable thumbs, which leaves the task of putting the condom on, and even more distastefully, removing it, completely up to the owner. When you think about it, though, if you live in the city, you already have to pick up your dog's ####### off the sidewalk anyway, so what's the big deal? If you're really a dog-lover and want your pet to live a happy and healthy life, you'll go that extra mile.

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[Nagishkaw 510]

He's getting senile.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

You're in condom ecstasy this morning, Charles.

[Yoink 7]

how the hell do you get those things on .. I aint puttin it on for 'em

[one...two...tree 2,762]

how the hell do you get those things on .. I aint puttin it on for 'em

Have Fido lie on his back.

[Yoink 7]

how the hell do you get those things on .. I aint puttin it on for 'em

Have Fido lie on his back.

[Mononoke28 135]

how the hell do you get those things on .. I aint puttin it on for 'em

But better yet, how do you take them off after they're done doing the deed? =X

Diana

[Ban Hammer 13,349]

You're in condom ecstasy this morning, Charles.

while doing a search for "clinton condoms" that picture showed up, so i just had to post it

how the hell do you get those things on .. I aint puttin it on for 'em

But better yet, how do you take them off after they're done doing the deed? =X

Diana

[Nagishkaw 510]

You're in condom ecstasy this morning, Charles.

while doing a search for "clinton condoms" that picture showed up, so i just had to post it

Glad you did !

[maliciant 7]

This CAN'T be for real... nevermind the whole how do you put them on (cause seroiusly... there is so much wrong with that... you really think about it you are masturbating your dog or you are packing dog condoms with you every where you go in case you happen to find another dog in heat or you are actually arranging sexual encounters for your dog... there is no sane way for a condom to end up on a dogs #######... most people struggle putting a condom on themselves...).

Seriously, liver flavored, that's the point I decided it had to be a joke... that would just be a way to get dogs to eat rubber...

[almaty 19]

#######!!!!!!! you mean they are for dogs!!!!!! i am such a chopf##k

[rclouse 0]

My chihuahua is intact, and we have a plush toy cat he has his way with. Keeps him happy and us entertained.

[Trumplestiltskin 5,791]

Dogdoms

[Amby 490]

how the hell do you get those things on .. I aint puttin it on for 'em

Have Fido lie on his back.

Is there something you need to tell us?

[Krikit 1,164]

Ralston Purina has sunk many years and millions of research dollars to a new low into the field of dog contraceptive devices and settled upon the idea of a poochie prophylactic after early experiments with a Doggie IUD and Doggie Diaphragm proved less then successful.

fixx0red

Oh, and, yeah..... liver flavored for her pleasure. I can just picture all the pleasure she's going to get the next time she's at the doggie park with a behind smelling like liver. Lots and lots of pleasure.

Edited January 23, 2009 by Krikit