60 Ways to Keep Your Husbands Love

[Leedah 22]

60 Ways to Keep Your Husbands Love

Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem

"And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect."

[Rum : 21]

60 Ways to Keep Your Husband's Love

1. Behave like a female, i.e. all the tenderness of a female–a man doesn't want a man for his wife!

2. Dress pleasantly/attractively. If you are a home-maker, don't stay in your sleeping suit all day.

3. Smell good!

4. Don't lay out all your problems on your husband as soon as he walks in. Give him a little mental break.

5. Don't keep asking him, "what are you thinking?"

6. Stop nagging non-stop before Allah ta'ala gives you something really to complain about.

7. Absolutely no talking about your spousal problems to anyone you meet, not even under the pretense of seeking help! If you think you want to solve legitimate marital issues, then go seek counseling with the right person who can give advice in either:

8. Be kind to your mother-in-law the same way you would like your husband to be kind to your own mother.

9. Learn all the rights and obligations of each other in Islam. Focus on fulfilling your obligations, not demanding your rights

10. Race to the door when he comes home, as if you were waiting for him. Smile and hug him.

11. Keep your house clean, at least to the level that he wants it.

12. Compliment him on the things you know he's not so confident about (looks, intelligence, etc.) This will build his self-esteem.

13. Tell him he's the best husband ever.

14. Call his family often.

15. Give him a simple task to do at home and then thank him when he does it. This will encourage him to do more.

16. When he's talking about something boring, listen and nod your head. Even ask questions to make it seem like you're interested.

17. Encourage him to do good deeds.

18. If he's in a bad mood, give him some space. He'll get over it, inshaAllah.

19. Thank him sincerely for providing you with food and shelter. It's a big deal.

20. If he's angry with you and starts yelling, let him yell it out while you're quiet.You will see your fight will end a lot faster. Then when he's calm, you can tell him your side of the story and how you want him to change something.

21. When you're mad at him, don't say "YOU make me furious", rather, "This action makes me upset". Direct your anger to the action and circumstance rather than at him.

22. Remember that your husband has feelings, so take them into consideration.

23. Let him chill with his friends without guilt, especially if they're good guys.

Encourage him to go out, so he doesn't feel "cooped up" at home.

24. If your husband is annoyed over a little thing you do (and you can control it), then stop doing it. Really

25. Learn how to tell him what you expect without him having to guess all the time. Learn to communicate your feelings.

26. Don't get mad over small things. It's not worth it.

27. Make jokes. If you're not naturally funny, go on the internet and read some jokes, and then tell them to him.

28. Tell him you're the best wife ever and compliment yourself on certain things you know you're good at.

29. Learn to make his favorite dish.

30. Don't ever, EVER talk bad about him with friends or family unnecessarily. If they end up agreeing with you, you will see that it hits you back in the face because you get more depressed that you have a bad husband–and other people also think you have a bad husband.

31. Use your time wisely and get things accomplished. If you're a home-maker, take online classes and get active in your community. This will make you happy and a secondary bonus is that it impresses your husband.

32. Do all of the above fee sabeelillah and you will see Allah put barakah in everything you do.

33. Husband and wife should discuss and communicate with wisdom with each other to convey what they like and dislike of each other to do or not to do. Do NOT give commands or instructions like he's your servant. "They are garment to each other" [surah Baqarah, 2:187]

34. Tell your husband you love him, many, many times. Aisha, radiallahu anha, narrated that the Prophet , salallahu alaihi wasalaam, used to ask her how strong her love for him, she said like "a knot." And the next time he would ask her, "How is that knot?" He also used to reply to her saying, "Jazzakillah, O Aishah, wallahi, you have not rejoiced in me as I have rejoiced in you."

35. Have a race with your husband and let him win, even if you are much fitter and stronger than him.

36. Keep fit and take care of your health so you will remain a strong mother, wife, cook and housekeeper, inshaAllah you will not get FAT and frumpy.

37. Refine and cultivate good mannerisms i.e do not whine, don't laugh or talk too loud or walk like an elephant.

38. Do not leave the house without his permission and certainly not without his knowledge.

39. Make sure all his clothes are clean and pressed so he is always looking fresh and crisp.

40. Don't discuss important/controversial matters with him when he is tired or sleepy. Find right time for right discussion.

41. The way to a man's heart is through his stomach.

42. Always let him know that you appreciate him working and bringing home the "dough". It makes it easier for him to go to work.

43. Make sure you ALWAYS have something for dinner.

44. Brush your hair, everyday.

45. Don't forget to do laundry.

46. Surprise him with gifts. Even necessities, such as new shoes, can be gifts.

47. Listen to him. (Even when he talks about extremely boring things like basketball or computers.)

48. Try (hard as it might be) to take interest in his hobbies

49. Try not to go shopping too much … and spend all his money.

50. Look attractive and be seductive towards him. Flirt with him.

51. Learn tricks and "techniques" to please your husband in intimacy. (Of course goes both ways.)

52. Prepare for special evenings with him with special dinner and exclusive time (no children permitted).

53. Take care of your skin, especially your face. The face is center of attraction.

54. If you not satisfied intimately, talk to him and tell him. Help him or provide resources, don't wait until matters become worse.

55. Ask Allah to strengthen and preserve the bonds of compassion and love between the two of you, every day, every prayer. Ask him to protect that bond from Shaytaan. When a lesser devil destroys the love between spouses, he is the most beloved of Shaytaan. Nothing works like du'ah, and love only exists between spouses where Allah instills it.

56. Don't EVER compare your husbands to other husbands! For example don't say, "well her husband doesn't do that, why do you …" (thats a killer!)

57. Be happy with what you have because no one is perfect. If you want perfection, wait until you enter Jannah together inshaAllah–and of course, vice versa!

58. Strive for Allah's love first and foremost! if all wives try to seek Allah's love and pleasure, surely, they can keep their husbands love too. And remember–if Allah loves you, the angels will love you, and the entire creation will love you.

59. If you pack a lunch for your husband to take to work, from time to time

sneak in a little love note or sweet poem. If he doesn't take a lunch, leave the note somewhere else for him to find, like in his briefcase, or wallet or on the car steering-wheel

60. Wake him up for Qiyam ul-Layl (in the last third of the night) and ask him to pray with you.

[Amby 490]

#######?

[Leedah 22]

Yeah, we know you don't get it. Keep it moving.

[Amby 490]

some of them are a bit overboard. it's not that I don't get it I don't think it's a woman's duty to thank her husband for providing her a place to live or to always make dinner or always do the laundry

also

38. Do not leave the house without his permission and certainly not without his knowledge.

39. Make sure all his clothes are clean and pressed so he is always looking fresh and crisp.

if he wants his clothes ironed he can do it! also why can't you leave the house without his permission? that's crazy

Edited March 26, 2008 by Amber&Neil

[Leedah 22]

No problem. But as the post mentioned, it is geared towards Muslims.

Obviously, our belief system is abit different, but most muslim women (who practice) do believe in doing these things for their husbands. It's not about them doing it because their husbands are the end all be all,...it is because when one gets to the point that they want to please the creator more than anyone else, it all goes hand in hand.

It's not about feminism. It's about serving the one who brought you on this earth and can take you out at anytime.

Besides, if you read the male version that is on here, you will see the similarities.

peace

[Leedah 22]

About #38...

it is an ayat (verse) in the quran that speaks about a woman leaving the house without permission.

In actuality, it is the same in any marriage, except most people don't come out and say it bluntly or think of it that way.

But would you go all day without telling your husband where you were? Would you leave the house if your husband asked you not to (and he's providing everything)? Basically, no muslim man who loves his wife would even tell her to stay home all day anyway because he knows that she is not a toy but his wife who has feelings and goals just like he does.

I wonder why these two items are sore subjects for you. Considering that most married woman (muslim or not) think its their job to do these things anyway.

38. Do not leave the house without his permission and certainly not without his knowledge.

If Neil asked you to stay home, would you simply say"to hell with you! I'm outta here". Yeah right. It's about loving your spouse and respecting each other's wishes. Maybe he has a good reason to keep you safe that day. Who knows.

39. Make sure all his clothes are clean and pressed so he is always looking fresh and crisp.

Are you telling me that as a wife, you don't think it's your job to keep your husband looking good? Well dayum, nowadays WHAT exactly IS a wife?? I may be wrong, but a man can legally go to JAIL for abandoning his wife and not financially caring for his wife....but your saying that a woman should not be obligated to wash & press a SHIRT??

Come onnnnnnnn.....

Is this what we women have become?

Edited March 26, 2008 by Leedah

[Nessa 23]

####### indeed

[Alex+R 0]

:thanks allah she's not muslim:

[Jenn! 918]

60/60 here

[Alex+R 0]

60/60 here

You better not be wearing your pajamas or sweats...

[doodlebugg 10]

I think a lot of these are geared towards a house where the man is the sole provider. For example, how can I thank him for keeping a roof over my head when I own and pay for the house?

[Jenn! 918]

60/60 here

You better not be wearing your pajamas or sweats...

We're getting ready to have a race down the hallway and I'm gonna let him win.

I think a lot of these are geared towards a house where the man is the sole provider. For example, how can I thank him for keeping a roof over my head when I own and pay for the house?

Oh, you must direct him to the 60 Ways to Keep Your Wife's Love thread.

[Y's_habibitk 2]

No problem. But as the post mentioned, it is geared towards Muslims.

Obviously, our belief system is abit different, but most muslim women (who practice) do believe in doing these things for their husbands. It's not about them doing it because their husbands are the end all be all,...it is because when one gets to the point that they want to please the creator more than anyone else, it all goes hand in hand.

It's not about feminism. It's about serving the one who brought you on this earth and can take you out at anytime.

Besides, if you read the male version that is on here, you will see the similarities.

peace

Its funny because I just found this list about a month ago, and some of them I was thinking #######? Then I read the one for the husbands' and thought.. well at least they are fair.

Thanks for sharing for those who are interested

I havent finished reading all the replies.. Im sure they should get interesting hee hee

Take care,

Lisa

[Leedah 22]

so true. print that thread now.

[Alex+R 0]

60/60 here

You better not be wearing your pajamas or sweats...

We're getting ready to have a race down the hallway and I'm gonna let him win.

We're gonna do that as soon as I finish getting jokes from the internet to recite and try to pass off as my own.