Prenup... to sign or not to sign!

[Beautiful_years 0]

I have taken time to read a lot of threads and discover that many USC have been used for the sole purpose of getting Green cards and that jeopardizes the situation for honest hearted individuals who are truely in love.

There are red flags sure to alert you to fraud but like we all know....love they say is blind and once blinded by the emotions of the heart you really dont see faults and when you do you make excuses for them until its too late.

I've read very bitter experiences from the effects of major family changes on immigration Benefits, and its sometimes depressing, some really have been used and its bitter and dehumanising to think that all the efforts put in to bringing their spouse here becomes wasted efforts, there is a lot of emotions involved, time, money, efforts, a lot of waiting and despair only to spend a couple of months together and as soon as he or she gets the much famous gc leaves.... the worse part isnt just leaving, some would want to claim everything too even those things you worked hard for before he or she came here!!!

NOTHING can kill romance faster than the word prenup. But with about one in three of all first marriages ending in divorce, and 50 percent of second or third ones hitting the skids, a prenup is smart financial planning.

Marriage is not just an emotional and physical union -- it's also a financial union. A prenup and the discussions that go with it can help ensure the financial well-being of the marriage also One option for softening the blow of a prenup is to add a "sunset clause," which specifies a time at which the contract would expire -- for example, after 5 or less years of marriage. Depending on what you both agree.

Fellow VJ members do you think asking for a prenup would scare potential scammers? and if yes, USC should start asking for one before the marriage and they can impose a certain number of years to it say sign a prenup, if the marriage turns sour and you leave then you leave with nothing!

I've read threads where people have doubts before marriage and still go through because of the limited time imposed on the k-1 visa's and realise they made a terrible mistake... would it be fair on both sides to ask for a prenup? Afterall, if you sincerely love your partner it wont be about the money or the assets, it ll be about you both!

I just want to hear your imput on this issue, and please, this is for civil people who wouldnt want to fight a battle of words or show how perfect their ENGLISH can be, or JUDGE other peoples comments or show they GRADUATED from HAVARD LAW school...

Lastly Excuse the typos if any.... Thanks for stopping by..

[Indeyes 0]

Well, its really touchy to hear, see or read the disappointment that follows failed marriages especially when one is a victim and has been used irregardless of emotions put it.

Now for signing a prenup? I dont think i would because it means he doesnt trust me, but on the other hand if its what he needs as a proof of my sincerity i guess i would provided we both agree on the terms and duration.

But it has never come up with us and money really isnt an issue.

Its more about us....

[vichygurl 1]

hmmm..I have never been into a situation but I will try to let you see my point of view. I think it's a case to case basis.

A prenuptial agreement is a written contract created by 2 people before they are married.A prenuptial typically lists all of the property each person owns (as well as any debts) and specifies what each person's property rights will be after the marriage. Other words it's an agreement between 2. I think this is a matter in which both of the concerns has assets and money to show.

I will sign if the agreement is really a must. As you said,marriage is not just emotions and physical union BUT financial as well.

In a situation in which the fiance has the money and owns property BUT he is old while the fiancee is young but then sincere and the fiance trust her...then in this case the prenuptial is depending on both parties.

Well, overall... I will sign. It doesn't matter to me as long as there is nothing in the agreement that says..he will not be obligated of my death.

Vida Taylor

Edited November 8, 2008 by blukiss24

[Indeyes 0]

hmmm..I have never been into a situation but I will try to let you see my point of view. I think it's a case to case basis.

A prenuptial agreement is a written contract created by 2 people before they are married.A prenuptial typically lists all of the property each person owns (as well as any debts) and specifies what each person's property rights will be after the marriage. Other words it's an agreement between 2. I think this is a matter in which both of the concerns has assets and money to show.

I will sign if the agreement is really a must. As you said,marriage is not just emotions and physical union BUT financial as well.

In a situation in which the fiance has the money and owns property BUT he is old while the fiancee is young but then sincere and the fiance trust her...then in this case the prenuptial is depending on both parties.

Well, overall... I will sign. It doesn't matter to me as long as there is nothing in the agreement that says..he will not be obligated of my death.

Vida Taylor

I agree with you, there are some basic responsibilities he would have to agree to.

i will be sure to wear googles when reading through and seek an attorney of my own too, so he doesnt get smart on me

Lol funny but truely, as a test of my love i would sign, but if it is for properties or fortunes we both work for and store then its 50/50.

[canadian_wife 1,808]

My husband and I signed one, and it was my idea to do so.

My husband did not push me into one nor did he raise objections when I asked for one.

It's not about love or trust or sincerity. It's about protection.

But this is a personal choice, each couple will be different

[Stinky Monkey 1]

I actually offered to sign a prenup, which my finace told me was not required and got a bit upset about it.

The reason that I offered was that due to AOS we will be putting everything in joint names wherever possible, so everything that he has worked and saved for, well one thing he wont put in joint names is his Harley

I did it more to show that material things did not matter to me, just him ,and it was my way of showing it

I think that if you are in loving relationship and talk about everything it does not hurt just to discuss this subject.

I dont think that it will deter scammers as most of them seem to be after the Green Card as a priority and not the assets of the marital home

[Beautiful_years 0]

I too would have signed one shoud he have asked for it, because i would have wanted to assure him i was here for him, us and our family and not the property or $$$ he had long acquired before i came over.

Love does make people do crazy things....

But it never crept up.

Its really sad when i read those threads and wonder what help the prenup would have given to either spouses because if either one decide to walk out on the relationship even though they get nothing they would have left with their intergrity so he wouldnt come up on vj and vent saying she left me now she needs us to split our assets bla bal bal

[DanielParul 50]

Make sure you read it thoroughly and have an attorney look at it. Its a personal thing so I don't think there is anything wrong with asking to sign a prenup. Just make sure you don't get taken for a ride either coz if a relationship does not work out its both parties that lose a lot.

[envy_me 18]

with proper conditions.. sign..

[Lili 3]

My hubby (USC) never asked for one. He trusts me and to be honest, we are both starting in life so we owe nothing material. If he had ask me for one, I would have signed it in a heartbeat.

[pepper 34]

me and my hubby signed one too..for me its not a trust issue and will never be one..just make sure you read it thoroughly or have a lawyer to explain all the conditions and clauses in it..its just matter of protecting what you have or own before plunging into marriage coz nobody can predict the future..

[tallcoolone 102]

A Per Nup is good in Communty Property States like Texas.

If it is signed and one of the parties has to declare bankruptcy then the spouse will not be affected on Credit Reports.

My relative has been going thru long custody battle with his X wife and he re married about 8 years ago, and they have signed a pre nup and it has helped keep his x wife from getting a lot of his asset and cash.

I see nothing wrong with a pre nup, and it should be decided upon a case by case basis by the two parties involved.

[JVKn'CVO 11]

We both did not want one. We're in this 100%. No conditions

Saludos,

Caro

[Zee Bee 61]

No prenup here...unless he wants to split my student loans

[mkg265 2]

Ah! Me too! Let's see in the case of our divorce, my husband would get half my student debts, and I'd let him keep his family home in Albania (not because I'm a push over, but because only Albanians can own property in Albania. I also wouldn't want to evict his 70 year old mother). My husband and I married young (25,21) we really don't have any thing worth fighting over.

It makes perfect sense if you have an established life before you get married to sign a prenup!