Personal life at the office

[Donna A 4]

i ususally dont talk about my personal life at work because everyone seams to turn whatever u say into something bad. like for example, i work at delphi and they filed bankruptsy and we lost almost half our wages and all i could hear from people is...your husband is a doctor what are u worried about. they dont seam to want to listen...he is not a rich doctor...he is a resident doctor and they work long hours for low pay. the big money comes later not now...so yes i have a reason to be concerned about loosing half my wages.

then there was i just got a new car last week. now i hear...oh ur husband must be making the big bucks now...no im just in debt like everyone else who buys a new car. i just get so sick of them making something nice something wrong.

as for the OP and having to listen to her boss there is a man at work also who wants to go into detail about everything. drives me crazy listening to stories about him him him. ive just got to the point where i will be polite and ask things like...well did u get ur deer this weekend..yes or no..dont go into details about how u slaughtered it...just yes or no.

i think he caught on that i dont want an hour long story about himself.

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

We work people hard enough so they won't have a personal life. Problem solved.

[SENKA 0]

I don't talk about my personal life, and I don't want to hear about theirs either. I just want to do my job and leave at 5, and forget about it, and forget about all the people I work with. I have friends outside work, they are just coworkers.

I feel bad for you, I couldn't take it if my boss or anyone else in the office start talking about personal life.

[Sofiyya 1,687]

My boss is N-U-T-S. She drives myself and every other employee up the wall every day of our lives. She doesn't know how to talk to people nicely, and we get complaints from clients who have to deal with her on a daily basis. She is hyperactive and runs around the office cursing people if they made a mistake. She is permanently stressed out and stresses everyone else out about nothing. That's just the beginning though...

For some reason I have been her new best friend since about April of this year. When I first started working here I thought it was kind of weird that she wanted to be friends and talk about personal things that she was going through. Now I can't take it anymore. Usually after the weekend everyone in the office says hello to eachother and asks if they had a nice weekend. It's gotten to the point where I never ask her about anything because I just don't care. It's hard to have to listen to someone's stories about their grandkids one minute, and having my name cursed the next for something that I didn't even do. It is impossible and pointless to try to show her that you didn't do something she is accusing you of.

This morning was just too much. I walked past her office, said goodmorning, went into my office and turned on the computer. Within 30 seconds she was in my office telling me about her new boyfriend that she met at a bar and how he is way better than the other guys she meets in the bars. Then she proceeded to talk in a baby voice about how her grandson "misses his nana" so he came to visit this weekend and it was just the best time of her life. That's when I threw up a little in my mouth. I just smiled and said "that's nice" until she left. Not once did she ask how anyone's weekend was or think to talk to anyone else besides herself.

I honestly couldn't care less about her personal life.

Do you guys talkabout your personal life at work or do you keep that separate?

I know this woman. She has been cloned and harrasses her employees at a government agency in Lodo Denver. They call her "the Troll". I hear about her whenever I lunch with some of her victims.

I don't talk about my personal business when working, but what I overhear from others would burn your ears.

[trueimage 0]

Where I work, we're all friends. Plus, we all share a common interest - bicycles. Obviously, I work at a bicycle shop. I have no job title, except for whatever I create for myself. Currently I'm "Most High e-Commerce Deity". I work on bikes, I build bikes, I sell bikes, I maintain the shop's websites, I make pretty displays, etc.

We spend the day talking. We're ALWAYS babbling. Cool bikes that we've owned, how much alcohol we consumed the night before, cool bikes we want to own, make fun of our boss and call him a Jew (he is), get made fun of BY our boss (my friend Jeff), talking about computers, women, cars, and on and on...

It's a great work environment and VERY low-stress. I'd hate to work in a place where I detested my coworkers and didn't talk to anyone unless I had to.

I wish I had a cool job that I loved (and that still covered the financial obligations).

[JenAlex 0]

I've been working with almost every single one of my co-workers for over 5 years. The newest person has been in our department for over 3 years. We all get along pretty well. We do get into fights and annoy each other but we are really friends. I'm lucky that I have a very very cool boss. She's laid-back and always willing to stand up for her employees. She's the kind of supervisor I hope to emulate some day. I work for a kick ### company with very little turn over. We often go out for drinks or dinner. I like the people I work with.

[Alex+R 0]

I don't get the "don't talk to me I'm doing my job" attitude I've seen some people post here. To me, that doesn't make any sense. You spend more of your week at work than with your family, so why wouldn't you want to get to know the people you share that workspace with? If you can see you're not going to like them, then fine, but some of you don't even want to have the occasional conversation about what you did over the weekend? Honestly, I've never even heard of that attitude.

[PlatyPius 5]

I've been working with almost every single one of my co-workers for over 5 years. The newest person has been in our department for over 3 years. We all get along pretty well. We do get into fights and annoy each other but we are really friends. I'm lucky that I have a very very cool boss. She's laid-back and always willing to stand up for her employees. She's the kind of supervisor I hope to emulate some day. I work for a kick ### company with very little turn over. We often go out for drinks or dinner. I like the people I work with.

Please to be getting me a job....

[Carlawarla 1]

I could call most if not all of my coworkers my friends! I couldn't imagine working with people that I didn't share my life with?! Maybe it's because of the field I was in...criminology/social work....naturally we're talkers

Anyway, I had enormous support for many stages in my life (worked there for 26 years), and I wouldn't be the person I am today without all their love and support.

Most of our friends throughout life are those we make through school and work!

Carla

[Mags 112]

I don't get the "don't talk to me I'm doing my job" attitude I've seen some people post here. To me, that doesn't make any sense. You spend more of your week at work than with your family, so why wouldn't you want to get to know the people you share that workspace with? If you can see you're not going to like them, then fine, but some of you don't even want to have the occasional conversation about what you did over the weekend? Honestly, I've never even heard of that attitude.

I agree. In my job back in the UK we always were chatting about what we did at the weekend and stuff. It was part of our coffee break routine and we all enjoyed it. Two of my best friends also worked there with me so we were always having a natter about this and that. Alex has a point...you spend most of your life at work so I'd always make the effort to make friends and enjoy myself the best way I could.

I can understand maybe not wanting to discuss too much of your personal life IF you don't have a rapport with the people you work with, but to not talk about anything at all that you have done would have (in my experience) gotten you a bit of a reputation for being a stroppy cow.

[*julez* 124]

I don't get the "don't talk to me I'm doing my job" attitude I've seen some people post here. To me, that doesn't make any sense. You spend more of your week at work than with your family, so why wouldn't you want to get to know the people you share that workspace with? If you can see you're not going to like them, then fine, but some of you don't even want to have the occasional conversation about what you did over the weekend? Honestly, I've never even heard of that attitude.

I agree completely, Alex! I really like the people I work with and like to hear what's going on with their lives/families. I feel grateful that as I've had some really hard times over the last few years they've been so supportive of me, willing to listen and ask me how things are going. In my current happy times, they are equally supportive and genuinely happy that things have improved for me so much! We always have fun, joking around. It makes coming to work so much better. I feel so lucky that I do work with such wonderful, caring and fun people!

[kerewin21 2]

I don't get the "don't talk to me I'm doing my job" attitude I've seen some people post here. To me, that doesn't make any sense. You spend more of your week at work than with your family, so why wouldn't you want to get to know the people you share that workspace with? If you can see you're not going to like them, then fine, but some of you don't even want to have the occasional conversation about what you did over the weekend? Honestly, I've never even heard of that attitude.

I agree completely, Alex! I really like the people I work with and like to hear what's going on with their lives/families. I feel grateful that as I've had some really hard times over the last few years they've been so supportive of me, willing to listen and ask me how things are going. In my current happy times, they are equally supportive and genuinely happy that things have improved for me so much! We always have fun, joking around. It makes coming to work so much better. I feel so lucky that I do work with such wonderful, caring and fun people!

I agree too. Of course, if my coworkers were like Sarah's boss, I guess I'd feel differently. But we definitely share what's going on. There was one person I work with who went off and got married without telling anyone! We only found out by seeing the ring on her finger. It's her right to not share, but we all felt a little bit put off by it.

[~Laura and Nick~ 5]

I don't get the "don't talk to me I'm doing my job" attitude I've seen some people post here. To me, that doesn't make any sense. You spend more of your week at work than with your family, so why wouldn't you want to get to know the people you share that workspace with? If you can see you're not going to like them, then fine, but some of you don't even want to have the occasional conversation about what you did over the weekend? Honestly, I've never even heard of that attitude.

I agree completely, Alex! I really like the people I work with and like to hear what's going on with their lives/families. I feel grateful that as I've had some really hard times over the last few years they've been so supportive of me, willing to listen and ask me how things are going. In my current happy times, they are equally supportive and genuinely happy that things have improved for me so much! We always have fun, joking around. It makes coming to work so much better. I feel so lucky that I do work with such wonderful, caring and fun people!

I also agree!

My last job we were like a big family. We shared our ups and downs with each other while still doing our job. It wasn't an office setting but still. My new job that I've had for little over a month is even more like a family. I've become very close to the people I work with in this short period of time. On our breaks we all talk about our families and children and what we did on the weekend. It's a good way to build relationships with people that you are working with, that way your work environment becomes more of a team rather than a bunch of strangers trying to work towards one goal without even knowing who each other are!

That's why they have social functions such as Christmas parties and get togethers because conversation and socializing is very important for the dynamic of a workplace to run smoothly. My job doesn't feel like "work" at all, I enjoy being there each and every day and I know why....because of the people and my relationships with them.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

I don't get the "don't talk to me I'm doing my job" attitude I've seen some people post here. To me, that doesn't make any sense. You spend more of your week at work than with your family, so why wouldn't you want to get to know the people you share that workspace with? If you can see you're not going to like them, then fine, but some of you don't even want to have the occasional conversation about what you did over the weekend? Honestly, I've never even heard of that attitude.

Agreed.

Even if you don't care about your coworkers, you should pretend to care. That's how teams are built.

[~krakatoa~ 27]

I usually keep mum about my personal life at work. My boss and co-workers would often throw open-ended questions at me so as to solicit info and prompt me into giving details. But I try to just give them a plain yes or no or smile and walk away like I have something far more important to do.

I forgot to add that I work in R&D and people are not so chatty about their personal lives. The atmosphere is stiff and we mostly discuss current projects, and issues around them and solving problems. The personal talk is kept to a minimum, only at break time but still we talk about work (and mostly problems in our other branches or contractors). I could have wanted a more "friendly" work environment but that's how it is there. And I love my work too.

Edited December 11, 2007 by krakatoa