Am I Overreacting??

[Satisfaction 1]

some men actually listen....

Really???? So there are actually men in this world who do listen, don't match porn and don't read Sport Illustrated?!! Dammit. I would love to meet a man like that!

[[[[TEST]]]]]

Hellooo? Anyone?

[[[[TEST]]]]]

Heelllooooooooo

BAD COMMAND. TEST FAILED.

I don't watch porn and I do not have a subscribtion to Sports Illustrated, although I do love watching Packer games and heading out to the ballpark to catch a baseball game.

Oh yeah - I'm not gay either.

So there you go.

LOL. And I guess you never look at a pretty girl walking down the street and you never masturbate either? Hum hum... If that is true, then something is really wrong with your libido. Having fantasies is perfectly normal and healthy. Procrastination is not.

[chri'stina 190]

So if looking at women in bikini's is wrong, should we all cancel our Victoria's Secret catalogs? I don't see how you can classify women in bikini's and porn in the same category.

I agree... and will go one step further... to all of you who find it upsetting if there men looked at porn... do you ever go to the beach? What do you expect the bloke to do if he were with you on the beach? Assuming that there at least 100 or odd women porn rag-models lounging around in their bikinis? Go into purdah? (Wow!!!! I was a porn model - I used to wear a bikini once upon a time!!!)

Do I think looking at a porn mag akin to adultery??? Not bloody likely!!! Were that the measure then heck I have been an adulteress several times over then coz I gaze at pics of that adonis - that gorgeous Roger Daltrey with his long tresses singing "See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me" with his torso completely exposed <sigh>.

this was covered pages ago...the difference is that he was seeking out women to look out, not happening to see them during normal life activities.

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

Do we know he was seeking them out and not , say, opening an email forward? (since it was a slide show?)

[chri'stina 190]

Do we know he was seeking them out and not , say, opening an email forward? (since it was a slide show?)

it's possible but according to cangal, he gave no such explanation for it. he didn't seem to give any explanation.

Edited April 19, 2006 by stina&suj

[Melo 1]

I seek to look at pics of Roger Daltrey and films (such as Woodstock) with Roger Daltrey in them... does that mean I am some kind of harlot? Or an adultress???

Ooooooooooooooops I forgot, I am already a member of the VJ Whores!!!

[Welshcookie 17]

Ooooooooooooooops I forgot, I am already a member of the VJ Whores!!!

[gimygirl 0]

So if looking at women in bikini's is wrong, should we all cancel our Victoria's Secret catalogs? I don't see how you can classify women in bikini's and porn in the same category.

I agree... and will go one step further... to all of you who find it upsetting if there men looked at porn... do you ever go to the beach? What do you expect the bloke to do if he were with you on the beach? Assuming that there at least 100 or odd women porn rag-models lounging around in their bikinis? Go into purdah? (Wow!!!! I was a porn model - I used to wear a bikini once upon a time!!!)

Do I think looking at a porn mag akin to adultery??? Not bloody likely!!! Were that the measure then heck I have been an adulteress several times over then coz I gaze at pics of that adonis - that gorgeous Roger Daltrey with his long tresses singing "See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me" with his torso completely exposed <sigh>.

this was covered pages ago...the difference is that he was seeking out women to look out, not happening to see them during normal life activities.

but cangal also admitted that if he looks at a woman in real life and should perhaps have a few extracurricular thoughts ... then that is adultery to her. of course, this is her belief ... but this places her husband in an extremely precarious position. she almost sets him up to lie about certain things. this is what we call a no-win situation for the man. can he ever be honest about his natural feelings.

Do i think its wrong when we are walking down the street and he looks at a beautiful woman, no if it stops there. If it starts into more of what would it be like to be with her and plays it out in his head, ya that bothers me, why because i see that as adultery.

[chri'stina 190]

I seek to look at pics of Roger Daltrey and films (such as Woodstock) with Roger Daltrey in them... does that mean I am some kind of harlot? Or an adultress???

no one here is saying that about you or anyone else, and if you and paul have agreed what is acceptable in your relationship, then that's your business. but for cangal this is not about what morals she has that we agree or disagree with, it doesn't matter. she wants to know how others would act if their husband did something he said he wouldn't do and that is a touchy subject in their marriage. no matter what it is. but it seems that point keeps getting forgotten!

many of us do not agree on what is right/wrong(pertaining to porn,looking at females, anything etc), but that is not the whole point of this and it shouldn't be turned into that alone.

Edited April 19, 2006 by stina&suj

[jordanianprincess 0]

So if looking at women in bikini's is wrong, should we all cancel our Victoria's Secret catalogs? I don't see how you can classify women in bikini's and porn in the same category.

I agree... and will go one step further... to all of you who find it upsetting if there men looked at porn... do you ever go to the beach? What do you expect the bloke to do if he were with you on the beach? Assuming that there at least 100 or odd women porn rag-models lounging around in their bikinis? Go into purdah? (Wow!!!! I was a porn model - I used to wear a bikini once upon a time!!!)

Do I think looking at a porn mag akin to adultery??? Not bloody likely!!! Were that the measure then heck I have been an adulteress several times over then coz I gaze at pics of that adonis - that gorgeous Roger Daltrey with his long tresses singing "See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me" with his torso completely exposed <sigh>.

this was covered pages ago...the difference is that he was seeking out women to look out, not happening to see them during normal life activities.

Which was also covered yesterday!!! Is everyone here so nieve that you could possibly think most men don't seek out beautiful women period? Stina, I respect you P.O.V. and you have stated that this is something that you AND your husband are both not into. What happens if the guy is actually into it, he has to stop because the woman said so? Even if he agreed to stop, he will do it any chance he gets.

I think there are lots of valid points here, no one is right, no one is wrong. Everyone has to do what works for them mutually. Maybe the discussion that should take place, is why did he promise to stop and kept going? Maybe the real question should be "Does he even want to stop"? If he doesn't want to stop, he never will. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.

Is there anyone here that would want to constantly check up on their S/O all the time? You can't be happy that way, you might as well put a leash on them and cut their steak at the dinner table. Will someone stop smoking if they dont' want to?

[Melo 1]

I seek to look at pics of Roger Daltrey and films (such as Woodstock) with Roger Daltrey in them... does that mean I am some kind of harlot? Or an adultress???

no one here is saying that about you or anyone else, and if you and paul have agreed what is acceptable in your relationship, then that's your business. but for cangal this is not about what morals she has that we agree or disagree with, it doesn't matter. she wants to know how others would act if their husband did something he said he wouldn't do and that is a touchy subject in their marriage. no matter what it is. but it seems that point keeps getting forgotten!

many of us do not agree on what is right/wrong, but that is not the whole point of this and it shouldn't be turned into that alone.

How many times do people do things they say they won't do? Paul and I had agreed that we would consult each other about the digital magazine we have (which will eventually become a print one). I am so used to taking decisions about the Bazaar and things that relate to the Bazaar that I forget.... almost each and every single time I have forgotten. Did I do that deliberately? No... yet it has happened. I left him out of the decision-making because I am so used to taking those decisions myself. Did I hurt Paul? Yes. I do try to remember to include him. But it may happen again that I don't. This is something he and I have agreed upon... but I am guilty of not including him; I do try but there are times when I forget. There are times when I completely disregard what he suggests and do things my way. I have to learn how to function as a couple and not as the single woman I have been thus far. It could take a while for that to happen. But I assure you that I love my Paul to bits and would not want to hurt him deliberately, but it has happened.

[Cassie 8]

Is there anyone here that would want to constantly check up on their S/O all the time? You can't be happy that way, you might as well put a leash on them and cut their steak at the dinner table. Will someone stop smoking if they dont' want to?

Well, there are certain habits/behaviours that both Jerry and I are working on to change and/or eliminate, and as a result, we are keeping each other accountable. There are times that I get frustrated when I REALLY want to fall back on those behaviours and Jerry lovingly kicks my butt, and vice versa. But I would be more frustrated if he didn't help me out in this area. (And before someone comments, these habits/behaviours are major deals, not something like chewing on my fingernails). but that's just us.

[jordanianprincess 0]

Is there anyone here that would want to constantly check up on their S/O all the time? You can't be happy that way, you might as well put a leash on them and cut their steak at the dinner table. Will someone stop smoking if they dont' want to?

Well, there are certain habits/behaviours that both Jerry and I are working on to change and/or eliminate, and as a result, we are keeping each other accountable. There are times that I get frustrated when I REALLY want to fall back on those behaviours and Jerry lovingly kicks my butt, and vice versa. But I would be more frustrated if he didn't help me out in this area. (And before someone comments, these habits/behaviours are major deals, not something like chewing on my fingernails). but that's just us.

Being held accountable and going through files on a PC, someone's car, their purse, their wallet is completely different.

Let's put some perspective on this from a different angle please. You teenage daugher has a MySpace account. You decide that you don't want her to use MySpace at all. How can you effictlvly make sure she does not use MySpace unless you spy on her?

[rebeccajo 14]

Well, CanGal, I see you on the thread.

How did it go?

[mercuryroad 0]

some men actually listen....

Really???? So there are actually men in this world who do listen, don't match porn and don't read Sport Illustrated?!! Dammit. I would love to meet a man like that!

[[[[TEST]]]]]

Hellooo? Anyone?

[[[[TEST]]]]]

Heelllooooooooo

BAD COMMAND. TEST FAILED.

I don't watch porn and I do not have a subscribtion to Sports Illustrated, although I do love watching Packer games and heading out to the ballpark to catch a baseball game.

Oh yeah - I'm not gay either.

So there you go.

LOL. And I guess you never look at a pretty girl walking down the street and you never masturbate either? Hum hum... If that is true, then something is really wrong with your libido. Having fantasies is perfectly normal and healthy. Procrastination is not.

Aye chica.....I have seen beautiful women.....I have seen a porno. Do I watch porn or seek it out....no.

And my labido is just fine hahahaha........actually it leads to many of my jokes. Brother Dean can back me up on that one.

I make personal choices based on my needs and what I think is right and wrong. Women are actually much sexier with clothes on....leaves more to the imagination and uh....fantasies as you put it.

That being said - I also don't have a problem with anyone watching it because I think for many people it can be pretty harmless and I've known many couples who actually use it as foreplay, etc. I say be happy!

For me.....ehhh.....don't need it.

[Cassie 8]

Is there anyone here that would want to constantly check up on their S/O all the time? You can't be happy that way, you might as well put a leash on them and cut their steak at the dinner table. Will someone stop smoking if they dont' want to?

Well, there are certain habits/behaviours that both Jerry and I are working on to change and/or eliminate, and as a result, we are keeping each other accountable. There are times that I get frustrated when I REALLY want to fall back on those behaviours and Jerry lovingly kicks my butt, and vice versa. But I would be more frustrated if he didn't help me out in this area. (And before someone comments, these habits/behaviours are major deals, not something like chewing on my fingernails). but that's just us.

Being held accountable and going through files on a PC, someone's car, their purse, their wallet is completely different.

Not really, when we have given each other permission to do so as part of the accountability process.

Edited April 19, 2006 by Cassie