How long the adjusting period was?

[StillThePrettiest 3]

I feel the same way about some of those, specially 'good girl'

I REALLY try hard not to compare too much, because it drives me nuts when other people do it, but I know I sometimes still do... even if it's only in my head

and for AGES after I moved to London I mentally converted every price into Aus dollars, just to get an idea - and of course when I went back to Australia in May I started converting everything to British pounds

I think it's natural to compare; gives us all a context... it's whether we do so critically (and constantly ) that can be the annoying thing

[Ovaltine Jenkins 5]

Good luck at your interview. Let us know how it went.

The interview went well If you wanna read more details I put it here http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=100308

[Brian & Kathy 0]

Great thread so far everyone! I really enjoy reading all these little differnces.

It really is all the little things that are a shock when you are in a foreign country. I've visited my fiancee in china several times now, so I've experienced it a little. We have a lot of fun pointing out and learning the differences together though. She often says I'm backwards for certain things, and I can say the same about her for other things (but all in good fun).

On my first visit, during the ride home from the airport, we were on the freeway and I saw a sign with a fork and spoon crossed, obviously a place to stop for eating. I asked, shouldn't it be pair of chopstick crossed instead of a fork and spoon? I had completely forgotten it until about 10 months later when she reminded me.

I have no doubt it would be difficult to adjust to life here. At times, it will be overwhelming and I know because I've felt similar things just from living in china for 2 weeks at a time. It isn't what I missed, but what I don't understand and what I don't have control over.

[mox 298]

This has been a fantastic thread to just sit back and lurk in. My SO will hopefully be here in the spring, and I know it's going to be a huge adjustment for her, just based on what I already know about her everyday culture. For instance I've completely resigned myself to the idea that there will be no wearing of shoes in the house. And for Russians, there's not a big difference between the types of meals they eat for breakfast or supper, plus there has to be black bread at every meal, so that should be interesting just for starters. I can't even imagine all the surprises waiting both her and I. So keep the stories coming, it's great to hear about some of the situations we Americans take for granted that throw the rest of you for a loop.

[alejandra2 0]

Yes!! Is a great tread is nice to see other people experiences about our new lifes in a foreign country. Well in my case I am still adjusting I love to be with my husband and spend time together. Something that I really like here are the malls and all the stores even grocery stores they are so big and too many choices for eveything I can spend hours just in the stores I love it!!! On the other hand ...the weather ......well is too cold here I don't know if I will ever adjust to this kind of weather 20F is tooooooooooooo much for me. And the tips oh my God!! I feel is too much 10 or 15 % for a tip but I am sure I will like it if I were waitress hahahah.

[msu17 0]

Speaking as the USC here... My husband seems to be doing pretty well, though he's starting to miss home a bit after 6 months (though thankfully we're leaving Mon for a visit). Mainly he needs to get a job and feel like he's contributing. Its also hard since I dont know anyone who's into the same things he likes (soccer for the most part ) We are adjusting to living with each other really well, its just the move to the US. Regarding others comments on the "good girl" or "honey" comments, I personally HATE them! I've heard them my whole life and think they are 100% rude and condescending. I want to yell at them every time, but instead I just tip them really badly

[mox 298]

Its also hard since I dont know anyone who's into the same things he likes (soccer for the most part )

Not to derail the thread, but head on over to your nearest British pub. There's a 99% chance they sponsor a local team who are always looking for players.

[40bear 0]

Hi guys, just wondering. Those of you who already are living together. Did you have major or minor problems adjusting to each others household, way of doing things, habbits or whatever and if so how long did it take for you to get used to all those changes. Same question for moving and living in a new country (for lotsa people so far away from home). Was your adjustment period short or long or did you not even notice? Maybe also depends what country the person comes from I guess?

Take care all of you

Adjusting because you guys are living in together?hmm..here is my opinion through my own experience..me and my husband lived-in for about 5years..and here it goes..we have issues..alot of differences and we are always fighting..but you know..in a relationship there is what i call RRUCT...Respect,Responsibility,Understanding,Caring and Trust..marriage or live in have to have that..if only one is lost,then a relationship is not gonna work..now we are married like 4 moths ago..and we are still having an issue..so you have to give and take..and there is no time limit to a relationship you know what i mean?dont think about when is going to stop the fight...what you have to do is think about it and even if it is not your fault you still have to say sorry so in that way both of you talk about that problem you guys are dealing with..me and my Husband is still fighting but you know we ended up saying sorry with each other because of respect...and it is not about what the culture,race or what country you came from..thats what i know for now..

[Ovaltine Jenkins 5]

Great thread so far everyone! I really enjoy reading all these little differnces.

It really is all the little things that are a shock when you are in a foreign country. I've visited my fiancee in china several times now, so I've experienced it a little. We have a lot of fun pointing out and learning the differences together though. She often says I'm backwards for certain things, and I can say the same about her for other things (but all in good fun).

On my first visit, during the ride home from the airport, we were on the freeway and I saw a sign with a fork and spoon crossed, obviously a place to stop for eating. I asked, shouldn't it be pair of chopstick crossed instead of a fork and spoon? I had completely forgotten it until about 10 months later when she reminded me.

I have no doubt it would be difficult to adjust to life here. At times, it will be overwhelming and I know because I've felt similar things just from living in china for 2 weeks at a time. It isn't what I missed, but what I don't understand and what I don't have control over.

Haha the backward thing reminded me of something Scott would say: "My dentist appointement was for 3pm but I had to move it back an hour" Which to me sounds like he moved it back to 2pm but he actually moved it "back" to 4pm. Which makes no sense to me cuz when you move something from 3pm to 4pm to me it´s moving forward not back LOL. Took some time getting used to this

[Ovaltine Jenkins 5]

This has been a fantastic thread to just sit back and lurk in. My SO will hopefully be here in the spring, and I know it's going to be a huge adjustment for her, just based on what I already know about her everyday culture. For instance I've completely resigned myself to the idea that there will be no wearing of shoes in the house. And for Russians, there's not a big difference between the types of meals they eat for breakfast or supper, plus there has to be black bread at every meal, so that should be interesting just for starters. I can't even imagine all the surprises waiting both her and I. So keep the stories coming, it's great to hear about some of the situations we Americans take for granted that throw the rest of you for a loop.

Well I know for her it´s impossible to imagine wearing shoes in the house. I grew up that way too. Though I already got used to it some and don´t have a problem with it unless the shoes are muddy or something. Though don´t know what my approach will be if we get a new carpet. I guess I don´t mind it on the old one now lol. But yeah I protested against shoes and now I even catch myself vacuuming while wearing shoes lol. But at home it´s much comfy for me wearing slippers anyway. But I don´t take the shoes off at the door like I am used to at home. But it might be cuz we haven´t had any shoe rack by the door lol. Which we already bought but we still need to put it together So we will see how it goes. But yeah...it´s something she might get used to anyways cuz it´s not really comfortable when you get visitors to start telling everyone to take there shoes off or something...guess sometimes it´s better to melt in with the new culture

Yeah I don´t like all the sweet types of breads and buns there are either. I like them occasionally but not on a regular basis like real (normal, dark or lighter) bread with seeds.

Scott and I we like all different kinds of food and have enjoyed him showing me all the stuff I´ve never eaten and vice versa...he loves Czech food and I love California food so everything is cool

[Ovaltine Jenkins 5]

Yes!! Is a great tread is nice to see other people experiences about our new lifes in a foreign country. Well in my case I am still adjusting I love to be with my husband and spend time together. Something that I really like here are the malls and all the stores even grocery stores they are so big and too many choices for eveything I can spend hours just in the stores I love it!!! On the other hand ...the weather ......well is too cold here I don't know if I will ever adjust to this kind of weather 20F is tooooooooooooo much for me. And the tips oh my God!! I feel is too much 10 or 15 % for a tip but I am sure I will like it if I were waitress hahahah.

hehe where do you live at? here in my country it gets cold in winter so in California it seems warmer though this winter here is pretty mild I think...lotsa rain though...I think...even if it´s cold in California, it´s mostly still sunny...here it can get very cloudy which isn´t that nice...was landing here last month and the sky above the clouds was so sunny and bright and under the clouds after we landed it was so dark and grey and snowey and rainy lol

[Ovaltine Jenkins 5]

Adjusting because you guys are living in together?hmm..here is my opinion through my own experience..me and my husband lived-in for about 5years..and here it goes..we have issues..alot of differences and we are always fighting..but you know..in a relationship there is what i call RRUCT...Respect,Responsibility,Understanding,Caring and Trust..marriage or live in have to have that..if only one is lost,then a relationship is not gonna work..now we are married like 4 moths ago..and we are still having an issue..so you have to give and take..and there is no time limit to a relationship you know what i mean?dont think about when is going to stop the fight...what you have to do is think about it and even if it is not your fault you still have to say sorry so in that way both of you talk about that problem you guys are dealing with..me and my Husband is still fighting but you know we ended up saying sorry with each other because of respect...and it is not about what the culture,race or what country you came from..thats what i know for now..

Well I think the country the beneficiary comes from might also play a role in adjusting cuz I met a guy on a plane who was originally from west Africa and he said coming to USA for the first time was a major shock for him. Everything was scary...the food (it made him sick), the roads (were too huge) etc. So I think a person from a European country for example would suffer from a smaller shock than that. Cuz we are kind of used to all the similar types of food and have lotsa traffic here too. (That are just 2 examples I could think of right now)

Scott says the traffic in Europe requires much more experienced driver cuz we don´t have so many "one way traffic roads" as seen in USA (lotsa traffic there flows one way so seems much safer and you can almost go to sleep - joking - while driving in USA lol) NOT And even though I am an experienced European driver that drives the stick and is always on guard cuz on our roads we can´t "go to sleep" when I come to USA and if I wanna get a car my car insurance will be 4x more expensive than Scott´s one cuz I have an international driver´s licence and not a California one and even then after I get a California one it will still be as expensive for me. I will have to have the CA license for 3 years to be considered experienced over there and get my cheap rate too

As for fights...we used to have some disagreements but lotsa times we found out it was caused by some language/cultural difference where for example I´d say something I thought was nice and he took it as something bad against him and vice versa. So we talked through those things a lot and improved our communication skills and since we know noone is here to hurt the other one we are able to discuss everything without fighting over something and it feels great Ofcourse sorry is an important word too

[little white guy 0]

OK

Before she left China wife made me take pictures of the house including furniture.

How it was placed in each room realy. Then closet space had to be examined.

I think she was able from the pictures to use some math formula to calculate

space for clothes, shoes etc. The 40 minute drive from the airport to home I

got told where my clothes and stuff would be put. 12am and the whole house

has to be re-arranged. Starting the next day wifey and me hit the town, I mean

the malls ..Still don't understand how she knew so much about rules

of the road. Was at a stop light and I guess I was taking to long to turn right.

She said man theres no don't turn on red sign so go ok .Long story short

sometimes I wonder if it was me that came from China. What a woman.

[BelwinMills 0]

Everyone adjust differently. I would say the first 2 months were the hardest. When he didn't have a drivers "L". Teaching him to drive on the right side of the road. When he earned his "DL" it got better and had his own car. Then it took two months to get a job and college to start. Now that he has his own life with his college career and job it helps. I am so grateful we had the CR1 visa everything came so quickly. We have lived together for 6 months and now things are running smoothly . All the best on your journey when your SO gets here.

[sj5 4]

my hubby is easy going person..no problem, but i'm his problem... e.i when I whining about food..

Edited December 14, 2007 by SJ