How many of you really know and understand

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

WOM-- I mastered the slow-two-handed eating. You make sure to always have somehting in your mouth and your right hand... and you just slowly eat.. like one grape at a time. That was how I got out of the not eating enough versus too much for what i felt like (which was nothing).

That is awesome.... and something I need to start doing.

Yeah hugging to me as an American is like the two kisses on the cheeks when meeting or saying Goodbye to Europeans.

When I hugged my Husband's bestfriend to show my gratefulness for his hospitality I didn't know I did anything wrong. His bestfriend apologize for five minutes to my Husband while I got on the bus back to Cairo. It wasn't until I got back to the US that I knew I did anything wrong and what they were talking about outside the bus.

Yea, the hugging thing was also an issue with me. My husband's Algerian friends/family in France never had a problem with it. So when I was saying goodbye to one of my husband's friends in Algeria, I gave him a big hug. We'd gotten to know each other, we were buddies. He turned bright red and had a shocked look on his face. My husband couldn't stop laughing. It also took the same friend awhile to be comfortable sitting alone with me in a car or at a cafe if my husband had to get up for some reason. He would stare straight ahead and give one word answers if I tried to talk to him until my husband told him it was ok.

On the whole though, I got the feeling that Algeria was more relaxed than some of the other MENA countries.. maybe just because we were in a city? Or the people I was around? I constantly saw guys and girls out together in groups and a few of my husband's female friends went out on dates, drove alone with men in cars, etc. Not the norm, I'm sure, but I noticed it happening more than in other MENA countries.

Oran is probably one of the most open cities in Algeria. Algiers is a completely other story. If you walk around with normal clothes in Algiers in some parts, cars will ride by and flash their headlights off and on and drive slowly by you because they think you are hooking. Oran is just more French and of course they have all the RAI and the cabaret scene and sexuality is more open. For example, none of the hotels in Oran will ask you for a marriage certificate. But in Algeirs you cannot book a room without it. Oran and Algiers are completely different. But the fact still remains, "good girls" wont get in a car with a man ,period. The men may "date" her but they will not marry her if she is seen getting in and out of cars with men. This is where the term MERIOULA comes from in Oran.. It means loose or independent woman and you will hear this word in alot of rai songs.. as opposed to MAHBOULA which is crazy girl

CHEERS

[Imua 0]

Wow - MENA is definitely more strict. In Nepal I don't think you would have the po-po breathing down your neck but you would definitely have tongues wagging and everyone staring at you - in central KTM it would definitely not be a good idea. Some of the sweetest memories I have though are of being with Govi in more remote, natural areas, ducking behind a tree and sneaking a quick kiss when nobody was looking.

[deadbird 2]

Ohhhh memories... I loved any "stolen" kiss we could get. I made sure not to make much eye contact or even speak to any man besides Ramy or his father unless they spoke to me first, and most of the time if they spoke to me first it was in Arabic so I wouldn't bother speaking at all because I didn't want to speak English. We surprisingly avoided lectures and misunderstandings, but then again I think I did a pretty good job of educating myself before going there.

There was only one point where some patrients stared daggers at me in a dr's office, but I thought to myself that I'll never see any of these people again so let them think what they want.

Ramy definitely was shy about kissing during the wedding here...of course it didn't help that people were constantly ringing bells (like banging glasses but all our glasses were plastic lol so we had the bells instead).

[sereia 0]

ahhhh all this reminds me of a trip abdou and i made on a train from casablanca to marrakech. we were sitting in a car with another moroccan couple. i think i layed down and had my head in abdou's lap and the other couple were doing the same. a little while later a policeman came in and demanded abdou get up and follow him. i could hear them arguing outside the door and then he came back in to demand to see my passport. eventually he let us go but abdou came back and said we almost got arrested!

[~~235~~ 0]

It depends where....In Tunisia it seems pretty normal . In Algeria hand holding to cross the street.. Kissing ABSOLUTELY NOT... If you kiss in the airport in Algiers the policemen are breathing down your back.....Public displays of affection? Um no.

Samir kissed me goodbye at the Algiers airport and it was weeks later (because he was so embarassed) that he told me that the police confronted him afterwards and told him that he had shown great disrespect. Can't wait to see him at JFK in one week...oh and can't wait to kiss him!

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

It depends where....In Tunisia it seems pretty normal . In Algeria hand holding to cross the street.. Kissing ABSOLUTELY NOT... If you kiss in the airport in Algiers the policemen are breathing down your back.....Public displays of affection? Um no.

Samir kissed me goodbye at the Algiers airport and it was weeks later (because he was so embarassed) that he told me that the police confronted him afterwards and told him that he had shown great disrespect. Can't wait to see him at JFK in one week...oh and can't wait to kiss him!

Mine kissed me on my face repeatedly in tunisia but not in Algiers.. I just kept sobbing so badly that the police let him walk behind the check point and stay with me. Yes I am a puss... sorry all you tough girls

[Imua 0]

It depends where....In Tunisia it seems pretty normal . In Algeria hand holding to cross the street.. Kissing ABSOLUTELY NOT... If you kiss in the airport in Algiers the policemen are breathing down your back.....Public displays of affection? Um no.

Samir kissed me goodbye at the Algiers airport and it was weeks later (because he was so embarassed) that he told me that the police confronted him afterwards and told him that he had shown great disrespect. Can't wait to see him at JFK in one week...oh and can't wait to kiss him!

Awww, this makes me sad - don't they realize that for most of us we may not get the opportunity to kiss and hug our love for months, even years in some cases? The proprieties must be preserved at all costs...

[Imua 0]

ahhhh all this reminds me of a trip abdou and i made on a train from casablanca to marrakech. we were sitting in a car with another moroccan couple. i think i layed down and had my head in abdou's lap and the other couple were doing the same. a little while later a policeman came in and demanded abdou get up and follow him. i could hear them arguing outside the door and then he came back in to demand to see my passport. eventually he let us go but abdou came back and said we almost got arrested!

WOW - in Nepal like I said hugging in public is not OK but on bus trips I used to sleep with my head on Govi's shoulder and his arm around me- the buses were often so crowded I might as well been sitting in his lap, so I guess it didn't matter...

[chri'stina 190]

Wow - MENA is definitely more strict. In Nepal I don't think you would have the po-po breathing down your neck but you would definitely have tongues wagging and everyone staring at you - in central KTM it would definitely not be a good idea. Some of the sweetest memories I have though are of being with Govi in more remote, natural areas, ducking behind a tree and sneaking a quick kiss when nobody was looking.

From my experience in India, you don't want to go around acting affectionate in public either. Like you said, the police won't do anything but you will have a lot of people staring at you. Some shocked, some curious, some disgusted, and some being pervs. So we didn't hold hands in public or anything. We could have, but I didn't feel like getting even more stares than we already got. My dad was also with me so you he also brought stares, being a big husky white guy. We hugged and stuff at the airport, but not while walking around New Delhi or Agra. Out of respect I wouldn't kiss him or act like that in public in India anyway unless it was saying goodbye at the airport, and even then I'd be careful.

I think the next time we are in India together, we will have our baby and will be married, and holding hands in that case won't be considered so "risque" in public there. Still I'd be careful.

[Nutty 2]

I lived in India and know what you're talking about....

[Imua 0]

I just always took Govi's lead in these things, not like I forced myself on him or anything.. He does know the culture better than me, having grown up in it and all, LOL... and he is so shy in general and from a village background so that I think if he thought holding hands in public was cool then it was definitely acceptable - I didn't notice anyone staring at us, and I am normally super-paranoid about that. Now, when my ex would speak super loudly to me in English("see how smart I am!!"), that's when the eyeballs would turn my way...

Edited December 1, 2007 by Pattu Rani

[sarah and hicham 3]

As someone who is more Moroccan than American, I just love going to Morocco and spending time helping Hicham reach good prices on everything we buy. I practically grew up there and feel more comfortable among my Moroccan peeps than Americans anyday. I understand the culture there as if I grew up in Morocco. Sometimes I have an identity crisis and can't remember if I'm Moroccan, Palestinian (what?) or American. It's so hard to be so capable of any culture on this planet.

K bye.

[Ban Hammer 13,490]

As someone who is more Moroccan than American, I just love going to Morocco and spending time helping Hicham reach good prices on everything we buy. I practically grew up there and feel more comfortable among my Moroccan peeps than Americans anyday. I understand the culture there as if I grew up in Morocco. Sometimes I have an identity crisis and can't remember if I'm Moroccan, Palestinian (what?) or American. It's so hard to be so capable of any culture on this planet.

K bye.

strange, you don't look moroccan.

[sarah and hicham 3]

WOM- You're right. I still have my loyal puppy dog at my heels.

Edited December 1, 2007 by sarah and hicham

[dreamscometrue 0]

So what do you suggest to "prepare" the foreign fiancee for life in America? What exactly are the specific issues that will shock them?