Lengthy visits while waiting

[RumRunner 0]

I am making another trip tomorrow! This time Thailand. We've visited a lot of countries together, places I would have never gone but Russians can only go to certain countries without a visa. I'm flat broke because of this but nothing matters more to me. I don't know how people do it if they don't have the time & money, but in my opinion Canadian/US couples have nothing to complain about.

Believe me, I'm not complaining. I know I have it a lot easier than a lot of couples on here. I feel very fortunate we do get to see each other as often as we do. I was just curious how some other couples manage to take so much time together while the paperwork is processing.

I love hearing everyone's stories! Thank you again!

Edited November 2, 2007 by RumRunner

[Kathryn41 3,205]

We had basically the same arrangements you do. Both of us worked and we would arrange for long weekends together using holiday and vacation days so we would have a 4 day visit alternating locations each month. This worked for the first few months (it took 9 months for us to go from application to approval for the K-1, then another 5 weeks before I could move south). We actually only got one visit in during the summer because of work schedules, and two in the fall due to work schedules, so he took a full 10 days of holidays and vacation days at Christmas to spend it with me. It was the longest time we had been together. Our I-129f was actually approved December 30th while he was here visiting (we applied June 19th). Because I needed to save money for the medical and the flight to Montreal we didn't actually visit in person again from January 2 until he flew up to drive me 'home' in early May.

You live with the hope of seeing each other soon counting down the days, and then with the knowledge that just a few more weeks and you will have the visa, and then the flurry of final arrangements when you finally do have the visa and know you are leaving. Spend this time with your friends and family at home, knowing that when you are finally together you will have each other, but you will be leaving them behind. When it is all said and done, the time apart really does 'disappear' into your memory. Good luck on your journey.

Edited November 2, 2007 by Kathryn41

[DKM 0]

Well I do feel bad for Canadians in how long it takes to get the interview. You'd think the consulate would have forseen this happening and staffed up a while ago. The internet has increased long distance romance between states as much as between countries and it seems everybody knows that now. Many people I know are marrying someone from across the country so it does not surprise me to see the surge of American/Canadian romances. I wonder how many American fiances/spouses make the move north? I'd guess just as many.

[msu17 0]

The first time we spent a lot of time together, he was in the US on a student visa (where we met). Then 2nd time, I was still in college and got a student work permit to the UK and worked over there for the summer. I think most people can't really take that much time together though. Ah the joys of international relationships...

[bozzo 0]

Our personal story is along the same lines as the others. Although I am the USC of the two, I was naturalized from France a year ago (got my green card then citizenship via my first marriage --long story short: married 6 years, didn't work, met my now-fiancee, divorced, got my citizenship, applied for a K-1--).

Plus I work for a French industrial group as an executive and I am sent to France 2/3 times a year for business, so we spent romantic weekends in Paris, plus my 3 weeks of vacation throughout the year. On her side, she had 5 weeks of vacation which she spent in LA or in France with me. All in all, we managed to see each other every 4 to 7 weeks for about a week at the time.

Since the NOA2 (10/05) she is here on a VWP for 3 months and she will just have to return to Switzerland for the interview (everything else is done, medical, I-134...) and we will get married as soon as she returns.

Good luck

Stephan

[RumRunner 0]

We had basically the same arrangements you do. Both of us worked and we would arrange for long weekends together using holiday and vacation days so we would have a 4 day visit alternating locations each month. This worked for the first few months (it took 9 months for us to go from application to approval for the K-1, then another 5 weeks before I could move south). We actually only got one visit in during the summer because of work schedules, and two in the fall due to work schedules, so he took a full 10 days of holidays and vacation days at Christmas to spend it with me. It was the longest time we had been together. Our I-129f was actually approved December 30th while he was here visiting (we applied June 19th). Because I needed to save money for the medical and the flight to Montreal we didn't actually visit in person again from January 2 until he flew up to drive me 'home' in early May.

You live with the hope of seeing each other soon counting down the days, and then with the knowledge that just a few more weeks and you will have the visa, and then the flurry of final arrangements when you finally do have the visa and know you are leaving. Spend this time with your friends and family at home, knowing that when you are finally together you will have each other, but you will be leaving them behind. When it is all said and done, the time apart really does 'disappear' into your memory. Good luck on your journey.

9 months?!? Ugh! You'd think that with Canada being pretty benign and adjacent and NAFTA and all that great stuff that it wouldn't be so darn long. I was anticipating 6-9 months, with the hopes of being more like 6 but now I guess I ought to assume much much longer. At least there is good info on here of what is really going on. I wish my boyfriend could use his vacation days to come here for Christmas but winter is his busy time at work (propane business) so it's hard for him to get away until spring. Thank you for the luck!

[Meridien 0]

Hello, I'm sort of in the same boat as you. We filed our I-129f about 4 weeks ago, so have many months to go before I can move down to the US. We have visited back and forth several times before getting engaged, usually for 5-6 day visits every 2 months or so. Since filing, I went for one short visit, and just got back to Canada 2 days ago. Because we both work full time and each have 3 weeks holiday a year, this is the best we can do. And it's starting to get expensive because I live in Western Canada, and he's in Eastern US, so it's a long flight!

I am planning to work until Christmas, then leave my job and go for a lengthy visit stateside until the I-129f is approved, at which time I will return for the medical and interview. This means that I will be unemployed for a long stretch of time, but luckily my fiance makes a decent wage, plus I will be selling my condo and will have the proceeds from that. Still, I do worry about being out of work for such a long stretch of time. At least the Vancouver consulate is faster than Montreal at scheduling interviews, I'm optimistically hoping to have my interview in March or April. We'll see how it goes! If I get too broke, I figure I can always come back to Canada, stay at my parents and do a little temp work or something...

We Canadians are lucky that visiting the US is easy, even during the K1 process. Still, even with our open border and friendly relationship with the US, our immigration visas take just as long as everyone elses. But, that's only fair, we are a completely separate country, as we constantly like to remind people!

[c2pirpal 0]

Well, we met in Washington D.C. while she was on a study tour last year. I have been to Brazil twice, she came here to the US to visit, once. We also took a vacation in Europe this year. Thinking that the K-1 process would be fast, I applied in July, but now wish I had applied earlier. I don't think my petition would be reviewed unitl December, if the dates posted reflect, actuals. She is reluctant to quit her job unitl notification of interview. I do enjoy my trip to Brazil, but I am burning up lots of leave.

[aj1 1]

Once a month? WOW i wish so bad i could see my man that much i would loose my mind. I have not seen my fiance in almost 2 years and he can't come hear its almost impossible, and i can't afford to see him right now. This process is definelty lenghthy but you are truly blessed if you get to see your love that often. I wish you both all the best on your journey and i pray that your wait is not long.

AJ1

[Mi & Mo 1]

My husband and I took turns to see each other at least every 2 weeks during the weekends. There is no direct flight from California to Brazil, so we flew 15 - 18 hours each way just to spend 2 or 3 days together and then go back home. From Sep 2006 to Jun 2007 he went down to Brazil 10 times and so did I to the US. Last year I came for the holidays and spent almost 2 months with him. That was great! Long visits are definitely the best deal. I wish we could have done that more but it just didn't work because both of us had to work! At least to pay for the tickets!

We were very lucky for being able to do all these trips during our K1 process.

Everybody here knows how hard it is to be in a long distance relationship. Some couples are able to visit each other, some are not. But the most important thing is that in the end we all are gonna be with the ones we love.

Edited November 3, 2007 by Mi & Mo

[~Laura and Nick~ 5]

Nick and I have been very lucky. This past year we've had 8 visits. for about 5 months we saw each other once a month. The longest we have gone in between is 3 months. The longest visit we had was about 3 weeks when I went down in August/September.

We are 8 hours apart and only an hour by plane but still, he works full time. Up until now I had a part time job that allowed me to take off pretty much whenever I wanted. I had 3 weeks of vacation (which I used to see him) and then I would take 4 to 5 day weekends quite a bit to fly down. Nick would do the same...ask for a Friday or Monday off and come for 4 days or so.

I just started a new job and so I won't really have any more holidays until November 2008, but I don't even plan on being in Canada then

Also, we are filing in a month so he's probably just going to come up here from now on.

He is coming up for Christmas for 2 weeks, the longest he has stayed in Canada yet.

We don't mind that it takes 6 - 9 months for this process...I mean, it sucks but at the same time, both of us really want to save more money, he wants to get a house and we don't want to get married till next September or so anyhow. We love each other completely and we both believe that nothing good comes easily and we always think of how rewarding it will be when we are finally together.

So special!

Things will happen when they happen. Seeing him is amazing and I cherish every time.

Edited November 3, 2007 by ~Laura and Nick~

[rebeccajo 14]

Well, the first time Wes came to see me for three weeks, he had enough paid holiday time (UK'ers get way more holiday/vacation time than USC's so you will typically see UK'ers with more visits than other couples - plus the VWP advantage).

The second time he came over (8 weeks) he took an unpaid sabbatical from his job. His rent was cheap and he wasn't burning any utilities while he was gone, but he had to play rent catch-up when he got back.

We got married shortly after that. We would both tell you one reason we pushed the marriage was to save travel cost. We really couldn't afford to keep doing that, and we couldn't stand to be apart. So, you aren't the only one who takes a risk and marries without spending lots of time physically together.

[RumRunner 0]

Hello, I'm sort of in the same boat as you. We filed our I-129f about 4 weeks ago, so have many months to go before I can move down to the US. We have visited back and forth several times before getting engaged, usually for 5-6 day visits every 2 months or so. Since filing, I went for one short visit, and just got back to Canada 2 days ago. Because we both work full time and each have 3 weeks holiday a year, this is the best we can do. And it's starting to get expensive because I live in Western Canada, and he's in Eastern US, so it's a long flight!

I am planning to work until Christmas, then leave my job and go for a lengthy visit stateside until the I-129f is approved, at which time I will return for the medical and interview. This means that I will be unemployed for a long stretch of time, but luckily my fiance makes a decent wage, plus I will be selling my condo and will have the proceeds from that. Still, I do worry about being out of work for such a long stretch of time. At least the Vancouver consulate is faster than Montreal at scheduling interviews, I'm optimistically hoping to have my interview in March or April. We'll see how it goes! If I get too broke, I figure I can always come back to Canada, stay at my parents and do a little temp work or something...

We Canadians are lucky that visiting the US is easy, even during the K1 process. Still, even with our open border and friendly relationship with the US, our immigration visas take just as long as everyone elses. But, that's only fair, we are a completely separate country, as we constantly like to remind people!

Hi Merdien! My boyfriend is in Alberta and I know that is considered western Canada. So that means his processing is through Vancouver too? That's good news! Although I'm in CA and he's in Alberta the flights are not so long but so darn expensive. I can fly to the UK fo cheaper than I can into Edmonton. Geesh! LOL He is trying to work out something with work and his sister near Calgary (to rent from her if his home sells early) and his house to have an extended stay here in late winter/early spring. He's in the same boat as you with the house to sell and then using proceeds while waiting and spending more time here. I was LOL at your comment about being a whole different country, my boyfriend and I alway make jokes about "you Canadians" and "you Americans" and I get a kick out of saying I have an international boyfriend. LOL But we are not so different at all!

[NYPeach 13]

Count us in the crew who could not afford frequent or lengthy visits - we would go 6 months between visits and the visits were about a week long.

IMing and daily phone calls helped a lot.

I feel for you, I remember very well how hard it was to be apart. It makes us grateful for every day we spend together.

[Jesse and Hema 2]

I guess it's just different with everyone's financial and employment situation!!

In my case, my fiancée visited me for a couple months this summer. She was unemployed and still lived with her parents, so was able to leave without worry. Financially, I paid for most of her plane ticket, but with the money I saved from two months of having home-cooked food instead of SubWay or Chipotlé, I probably broke even!

Also, my employer is AWESOME, and taking lots of vacation and flexible hours during the time she was here helped make it all very worthwhile.

Anyway, I've added my two cents... Best of luck to you and your awaiting future together!!

--Jesse G.