Aaaaand it's Friday

[sarah and hicham 3]

No, Sarah, you do NOT understand. You do NOT understand that YOU are equally ABUSIVE. You just use your words instead of your hands. Its all the same.

WOW Jean..you judge the words of someone who finds it sooo unbelievable that you would stay with an abuser (Sarah) to the actions of the actual abuser (your husband who went to JAIL due to his abuse) ans being the SAME????. Unfortunately this alone helpts to make sense why you find it so easy to excuse his behavior. May God keep you safe for you are on a dangerous road.

You have got to be kidding me. You think that my words which are meant only for you to open your eyes are as abusive as your husband's hands hitting you? Holy ######.

Another thing I find so interesting time after time is that once again, I am not the only person who commented on Jean, however her whole post is aimed towards me.

Definitely a very, very dangerous road. Jean, we are trying to help you, but once again you are too blind to see it. How can you possibly think that we would support your abusive relationship.

You are absolutely 100% delusional and oh so blind.

Edited November 3, 2007 by sarah and hicham

[doodlebug 3]

Jean remember when he almost cracked your skull? Did you ever take pictures of all the bruises? I remember how embarassed you were about having to go to work like that. It's a shame that you don't feel that you're worth more than this. It's more of a shame that our tax dollars went to pay for his stay in jail and now he's granted a greencard when other husbands, who don't beat their wives and haven't wasted taxpayer dollars are still waiting for theirs.

Exactly what did you expect to gain from having nagishaw post this information?

[LaL 418]

Jean - if you are requesting to have this ID disabled, you will have to PM Captain Ewok (again, if necessary).

[Fandango 1,439]

Sarah, you are so predictable its laughable. I see the cud chewers around here decided to lift their tails again. Whatever. Make up your soap operas about my intentions and sense of self. You do not know me or anything about my life. Its so easy to sit and respin the same old tired "I'm supposed to think like Oprah" mentality. If you haven't experienced something you really have no sense of the reality of it. No, Sarah, you do NOT understand. You do NOT understand that YOU are equally ABUSIVE. You just use your words instead of your hands. Its all the same. This was discussed in a group session I attended while working through all this. People like you are just as destructive as physical abusers. I've read some pretty foul and blatant violations of the TOS on this site in this thread alone, yet those who habitually violate it are left to flame and giggle. This site was I thought meant to share information. I asked someone to share mine so those who are in similar situations have something to reference. And there are some of us out here. Life isn't black and white, even for Dr. Phil. So what if I posted my experience. It gave another side of reality off the yellow brick road, yet very possible for anyone reading this, and some just can't handle the possibility that a couple CAN work through something like this. For those remarks about my husband being after a green card... think twice before you stick your foot in your mouth. It can happen to any of us. None are immune. THERE IS NO HAPPILY EVER AFTER UNLESS YOU MAKE IT HAPPEN. So cud munchers, scurry around bleating and flaming some more while the board moderators turn their biased eyes away. Bask in your own ugliness of your non-abusive natures.

For the people here with real minds and hearts, ignore this. It wasn't meant for you. Now if for the millionth time if someone would close my ID I would appreciate it.

I have been wondering about you and how you've been...someone called this thread to my attn, so I wanted to say hi and hope things are ok.

It appears to me that you're just lashing out at Sarah and making her the whipping post to vent your frustrations at the turmoil in your life...while Sarah is no shrinking violet, I really don't think that's fair of you. Sarah's words, however harsh you may find them, do not put your children at risk. For you to equate her with the abuse that you are allowing your husband to reign upon you, and for you to subject your children to witness...is life endangering.

I understand these are not the words you want to read...and you might not even do so, but I felt compelled to let you know that the very people you are lashing out at are the same ones who rallied around you when you needed someone to lean on. When you needed someone, they were all here for you. Your anger is misguided.

May God keep you and your children safe. As I told you in another thread...please think of your children. You are choosing this life for yourself AND them. They have no choice to what they are subjected to, and I pray that God keep them safe and emotionally healthy.

Edited November 3, 2007 by LisaD

[Fandango 1,439]

Sarah, you are so predictable its laughable. I see the cud chewers around here decided to lift their tails again. Whatever. Make up your soap operas about my intentions and sense of self. You do not know me or anything about my life. Its so easy to sit and respin the same old tired "I'm supposed to think like Oprah" mentality. If you haven't experienced something you really have no sense of the reality of it. No, Sarah, you do NOT understand. You do NOT understand that YOU are equally ABUSIVE. You just use your words instead of your hands. Its all the same. This was discussed in a group session I attended while working through all this. People like you are just as destructive as physical abusers. I've read some pretty foul and blatant violations of the TOS on this site in this thread alone, yet those who habitually violate it are left to flame and giggle. This site was I thought meant to share information. I asked someone to share mine so those who are in similar situations have something to reference. And there are some of us out here. Life isn't black and white, even for Dr. Phil. So what if I posted my experience. It gave another side of reality off the yellow brick road, yet very possible for anyone reading this, and some just can't handle the possibility that a couple CAN work through something like this. For those remarks about my husband being after a green card... think twice before you stick your foot in your mouth. It can happen to any of us. None are immune. THERE IS NO HAPPILY EVER AFTER UNLESS YOU MAKE IT HAPPEN. So cud munchers, scurry around bleating and flaming some more while the board moderators turn their biased eyes away. Bask in your own ugliness of your non-abusive natures.

For the people here with real minds and hearts, ignore this. It wasn't meant for you. Now if for the millionth time if someone would close my ID I would appreciate it.

I have been wondering about you and how you've been...someone called this thread to my attn, so I wanted to say hi and hope things are ok.

It appears to me that you're just lashing out at Sarah and making her the whipping post to vent your frustrations at the turmoil in your life...while Sarah is no shrinking violet, I really don't think that's fair of you. Sarah's words, however harsh you may find them, do not put your children at risk. For you to equate her with the abuse that you are allowing your husband to reign upon you, and for you to subject your children to witness...is life endangering.

I understand these are not the words you want to read...and you might not even do so, but I felt compelled to let you know that the very people you are lashing out at are the same ones who rallied around you when you needed someone to lean on. When you needed someone, they were all here for you. Your anger is misguided.

May God keep you and your children safe. As I told you in another thread...please think of your children. You are choosing this life for yourself AND them. They have no choice to what they are subjected to, and I pray that God keep them safe and emotionally healthy.

Can't edit, but apologies because it was someone else here that I was thinking about! So here's the edited version:

It appears to me that you're just lashing out at Sarah and making her the whipping post to vent your frustrations at the turmoil in your life...while Sarah is no shrinking violet, I really don't think that's fair of you. Sarah's words, however harsh you may find them, do not put your children at risk. For you to equate her with the abuse that you are allowing your husband to reign upon you is life endangering.

I understand these are not the words you want to read...and you might not even do so, but I felt compelled to let you know that the very people you are lashing out at are the same ones who rallied around you when you needed someone to lean on. When you needed someone, they were all here for you. Your anger is misguided.

May God keep you safe!

[doodlebug 3]

Sarah, you are so predictable its laughable. I see the cud chewers around here decided to lift their tails again. Whatever. Make up your soap operas about my intentions and sense of self. You do not know me or anything about my life. Its so easy to sit and respin the same old tired "I'm supposed to think like Oprah" mentality. If you haven't experienced something you really have no sense of the reality of it. No, Sarah, you do NOT understand. You do NOT understand that YOU are equally ABUSIVE. You just use your words instead of your hands. Its all the same. This was discussed in a group session I attended while working through all this. People like you are just as destructive as physical abusers. I've read some pretty foul and blatant violations of the TOS on this site in this thread alone, yet those who habitually violate it are left to flame and giggle. This site was I thought meant to share information. I asked someone to share mine so those who are in similar situations have something to reference. And there are some of us out here. Life isn't black and white, even for Dr. Phil. So what if I posted my experience. It gave another side of reality off the yellow brick road, yet very possible for anyone reading this, and some just can't handle the possibility that a couple CAN work through something like this. For those remarks about my husband being after a green card... think twice before you stick your foot in your mouth. It can happen to any of us. None are immune. THERE IS NO HAPPILY EVER AFTER UNLESS YOU MAKE IT HAPPEN. So cud munchers, scurry around bleating and flaming some more while the board moderators turn their biased eyes away. Bask in your own ugliness of your non-abusive natures.

For the people here with real minds and hearts, ignore this. It wasn't meant for you. Now if for the millionth time if someone would close my ID I would appreciate it.

I have been wondering about you and how you've been...someone called this thread to my attn, so I wanted to say hi and hope things are ok.

It appears to me that you're just lashing out at Sarah and making her the whipping post to vent your frustrations at the turmoil in your life...while Sarah is no shrinking violet, I really don't think that's fair of you. Sarah's words, however harsh you may find them, do not put your children at risk. For you to equate her with the abuse that you are allowing your husband to reign upon you, and for you to subject your children to witness...is life endangering.

I understand these are not the words you want to read...and you might not even do so, but I felt compelled to let you know that the very people you are lashing out at are the same ones who rallied around you when you needed someone to lean on. When you needed someone, they were all here for you. Your anger is misguided.

May God keep you and your children safe. As I told you in another thread...please think of your children. You are choosing this life for yourself AND them. They have no choice to what they are subjected to, and I pray that God keep them safe and emotionally healthy.

Can't edit, but apologies because it was someone else here that I was thinking about! So here's the edited version:

It appears to me that you're just lashing out at Sarah and making her the whipping post to vent your frustrations at the turmoil in your life...while Sarah is no shrinking violet, I really don't think that's fair of you. Sarah's words, however harsh you may find them, do not put your children at risk. For you to equate her with the abuse that you are allowing your husband to reign upon you is life endangering.

I understand these are not the words you want to read...and you might not even do so, but I felt compelled to let you know that the very people you are lashing out at are the same ones who rallied around you when you needed someone to lean on. When you needed someone, they were all here for you. Your anger is misguided.

May God keep you safe!

Actually the one you were originally talking about is Deemabrouk who not only kicked him out and changed the locks but is getting a lot of help and healing along with her children. It's still a hard road but one that is sooo much healthier for her and her kids in the end, thank God. I believe Jean has a son though and it must be hard for him to see his mom not feel she's worth enough to stand up for herself.

[Ban Hammer 13,110]

sigh........jean, for you

[Fandango 1,439]

Actually the one you were originally talking about is Deemabrouk who not only kicked him out and changed the locks but is getting a lot of help and healing along with her children. It's still a hard road but one that is sooo much healthier for her and her kids in the end, thank God. I believe Jean has a son though and it must be hard for him to see his mom not feel she's worth enough to stand up for herself.

Yeah, I realized that not too long after I posted....glad to hear about Dee that she's getting on better.

Jean, if you have children, my original post stands cept for the 'I told you in another thread...'

Be well and stay safe!

[peezey 0]

If "couples can work through this" means women taking their abusers back, well of course we know that happens. Jean, you are one sick puppy if you are equating Sarah to M. As usual, you are only looking for attention, and you don't care what kind. You would have posted your story yourself if you really meant to "help" anyone. It's your fault he's getting his green card. This just proves you didn't think you were worth as much as him, because clearly you didn't call off the process. Doodle is right, this is outrageous that a wife beater is getting his GC without an interview, but others wait and wait and have home inspections and denials and are strung along for years.

Sick sick sick sick.

[Ban Hammer 13,110]

If "couples can work through this" means women taking their abusers back, well of course we know that happens. Jean, you are one sick puppy if you are equating Sarah to M. As usual, you are only looking for attention, and you don't care what kind. You would have posted your story yourself if you really meant to "help" anyone. It's your fault he's getting his green card. This just proves you didn't think you were worth as much as him, because clearly you didn't call off the process. Doodle is right, this is outrageous that a wife beater is getting his GC without an interview, but others wait and wait and have home inspections and denials and are strung along for years.

Sick sick sick sick.

i think she has enough on her plate without blaming the victim too.

[peezey 0]

If "couples can work through this" means women taking their abusers back, well of course we know that happens. Jean, you are one sick puppy if you are equating Sarah to M. As usual, you are only looking for attention, and you don't care what kind. You would have posted your story yourself if you really meant to "help" anyone. It's your fault he's getting his green card. This just proves you didn't think you were worth as much as him, because clearly you didn't call off the process. Doodle is right, this is outrageous that a wife beater is getting his GC without an interview, but others wait and wait and have home inspections and denials and are strung along for years.

Sick sick sick sick.

i think she has enough on her plate without blaming the victim too.

It's her fault, plain and simple. She had ALL THE POWER and she just let it slip away. She should be ashamed of herself considering people with husbands that keep their hands to themselves are waiting waiting waiting on their GCs.

[Fandango 1,439]

If "couples can work through this" means women taking their abusers back, well of course we know that happens. Jean, you are one sick puppy if you are equating Sarah to M. As usual, you are only looking for attention, and you don't care what kind. You would have posted your story yourself if you really meant to "help" anyone. It's your fault he's getting his green card. This just proves you didn't think you were worth as much as him, because clearly you didn't call off the process. Doodle is right, this is outrageous that a wife beater is getting his GC without an interview, but others wait and wait and have home inspections and denials and are strung along for years.

Sick sick sick sick.

i think she has enough on her plate without blaming the victim too.

It was a pretty outlandish thing she accussed Sarah of, and tbh...if Jean's husband's violence is such a nonissue for her (apparantly so since she's taken him back), maybe others feel like there's no reason to coddle her?

I mean, I am certain Peezey would be very supportive if Jean reached out for help. Jean disclosed things that have made people mad that she is continuing to subject herself to this. They're mad because they care! No one should be treated like that, or have to live in fear of physical abuse. As if that's not bad enough, now Jean's not only making excuses for the atrocious things her husband has done for her, she's making ridiculous claims against others. Peezey's right...we all do know what happens to women who take their abusers back. And she's right, he got his greencard directly through her. And it does take up processing time while others get thrown thru the ringer.

My heart goes out to Jean and I do hope she does some soul searching and finds the wherewithall to realize that she's worth more than this. But at the same time...what exactly was the reason to ask another poster here to reveal her 'good news' about the GC approval? Don't dump serious issues here and have people worry about you and then expect them to...what? dance in the street because a wife beater got a greencard?

Sorry for my bluntness, but that's how I see it.

[Ban Hammer 13,110]

If "couples can work through this" means women taking their abusers back, well of course we know that happens. Jean, you are one sick puppy if you are equating Sarah to M. As usual, you are only looking for attention, and you don't care what kind. You would have posted your story yourself if you really meant to "help" anyone. It's your fault he's getting his green card. This just proves you didn't think you were worth as much as him, because clearly you didn't call off the process. Doodle is right, this is outrageous that a wife beater is getting his GC without an interview, but others wait and wait and have home inspections and denials and are strung along for years.

Sick sick sick sick.

i think she has enough on her plate without blaming the victim too.

It's her fault, plain and simple. She had ALL THE POWER and she just let it slip away. She should be ashamed of herself considering people with husbands that keep their hands to themselves are waiting waiting waiting on their GCs.

i'm sure she feels so much better now that you've laid that at her feet. keep kicking her, i'm sure that is a tremendous boost to her self esteem.

[Ban Hammer 13,110]

If "couples can work through this" means women taking their abusers back, well of course we know that happens. Jean, you are one sick puppy if you are equating Sarah to M. As usual, you are only looking for attention, and you don't care what kind. You would have posted your story yourself if you really meant to "help" anyone. It's your fault he's getting his green card. This just proves you didn't think you were worth as much as him, because clearly you didn't call off the process. Doodle is right, this is outrageous that a wife beater is getting his GC without an interview, but others wait and wait and have home inspections and denials and are strung along for years.

Sick sick sick sick.

i think she has enough on her plate without blaming the victim too.

It was a pretty outlandish thing she accussed Sarah of, and tbh...if Jean's husband's violence is such a nonissue for her (apparantly so since she's taken him back), maybe others feel like there's no reason to coddle her?

I mean, I am certain Peezey would be very supportive if Jean reached out for help. Jean disclosed things that have made people mad that she is continuing to subject herself to this. They're mad because they care! No one should be treated like that, or have to live in fear of physical abuse. As if that's not bad enough, now Jean's not only making excuses for the atrocious things her husband has done for her, she's making ridiculous claims against others. Peezey's right...we all do know what happens to women who take their abusers back. And she's right, he got his greencard directly through her. And it does take up processing time while others get thrown thru the ringer.

My heart goes out to Jean and I do hope she does some soul searching and finds the wherewithall to realize that she's worth more than this. But at the same time...what exactly was the reason to ask another poster here to reveal her 'good news' about the GC approval? Don't dump serious issues here and have people worry about you and then expect them to...what? dance in the street because a wife beater got a greencard?

Sorry for my bluntness, but that's how I see it.

understood, but i don't see how that's making jean feel any better.

[Fandango 1,439]

understood, but i don't see how that's making jean feel any better.

Maybe...JUST MAYBE...the words will be food for thought and might be on the side of 'tough love' if ya know what I mean.

A true friend will tell you the truth, not what you want to hear....

ETA: It might hurt her feelings, but it could very well save her life....

Edited November 4, 2007 by LisaD