THE Marine Corps Version of Genesis 1

[Jasman0717 9]

THE Marine Corps Version of Genesis 1

In the beginning was the word, and the word was God.

In the beginning was God, and all else was darkness and void, and without form. So God created the heavens and the Earth. He created the sun, and the moon, and the stars, so that light might pierce the darkness. The Earth, God divided between the land and the sea, and these he filled with many assorted creatures.

And the dark, salty, slimy creatures that inhabited the murky depths of the oceans, God called sailors. And He dressed them accordingly. They had little trousers that looked like bells at the bottom. And their shirts had cute little flaps on them to hide the hickeys on their necks. He also gave them long sideburns and shabby looking beards. God nicknamed them "squids" and banished them to a lifetime at sea, so that normal folks would not have to associate with them. To further identify these unloved creatures, He called them "petty" and "commodore" instead of titles worthy of red-blooded men.

And the flaky creatures of the land, God called soldiers. And with a twinkle in His eye, and a sense of humor that only He could have, God made their trousers too short and their covers too large. He also made their pockets oversized, so that they may warm their hands. And to adorn their uniforms, God gave them badges in quantities that only a dime store owner could appreciate. And He gave them emblems and crests... and all sorts of shiny things that glittered...and devices that dangled. (When you are God you tend to get carried away.)

On the 6th day, He thought about creating some air creatures for which he designed a Greyhound bus driver's uniform, especially for Air Force flyboys. But He discarded the idea during the first week, and it was not until years later that some apostles resurrected this theme and established what we now know as the "Wild-Blue-Yonder Wonders."

And on the 7th day, as you know, God rested.

But on the 8th day, at 0730, God looked down upon the earth and was not happy. No, God was not happy! So He thought about His labors, and in His divine wisdom God created a divine creature. And this He called Marine. And these Marines, who God had created in His own image, were to be of the air, and of the land, and of the sea. And these He gave many wonderful uniforms. Some were green; some were blue with red trim. And in the early days, some were even a beautiful tan. He gave them practical fighting uniforms, so that they could wage war against the forces of Satan and evil. He gave them service uniforms for their daily work and training. And He gave them evening and dress uniforms... sharp and stylish, handsome things... so that they might promenade with their ladies on Saturday night and impress the hell out of everybody! He even gave them swords, so that people who were not impressed could be dealt with accordingly. And at the end of the 8th day, God looked down upon the earth and saw that it was good. But was God happy? No! God was still not happy! Because in the course of His labors, He had forgotten one thing: He did not have a Marine uniform for himself. He thought about it, and thought about it, and finally God satisfied Himself in knowing that, well... not everybody can be a Marine!

[Hilarious Clinton 452]

The Marines make the bestest gate guards the Navy could ask for.

[Ban Hammer 13,352]

don't make me dig out my collection of marine jokes

[Otto 83]

[GaryC 7]

The marines are great! I am proud that they are part of the Navy!!

[Scott & Lai 12]

The Marines make the bestest gate guards the Navy could ask for.

And yet, the public entrance to Pearl Harbor is now guarded not by a Marine, as should be, but by a rent-a-cop

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

My former and late Step-Grandpa Guess was in the Navy and served in WWII.

My late Step-Grandpa Keith was in the Navy and served in WWII.

My late Grandpa Petersen was in the military but I don't know what branch.

My Dad was a Sgt. in the Army's Motor pool in the Vietnam War.

My brother Oz is a Sgt. in the Marine's and going on a tour to Iraq in November.

My brother Dal is in the Navy being stationed in Norfolk,Virginia on the USS Carl Vinson.

Not to mention the countless friends from high school and college that are serving or have served in one of the military branches for the US government.

[Ban Hammer 13,352]

The marines are great! I am proud that they are part of the Navy!!

i've heard the term "navy mattress" used for marines.........

[Scott & Lai 12]

My former and late Step-Grandpa Guess was in the Navy and served in WWII.

My late Step-Grandpa Keith was in the Navy and served in WWII.

My late Grandpa Petersen was in the military but I don't know what branch.

My Dad was a Sgt. in the Army's Motor pool in the Vietnam War.

My brother Oz is a Sgt. in the Marine's and going on a tour to Iraq in November.

My brother Dal is in the Navy being stationed in Norfolk,Virginia on the USS Carl Vinson.

Not to mention the countless friends from high school and college that are serving or have served in one of the military branches for the US government.

My dad was an ensign in the Navy during the Korean War. Can't say what he did...let's just say he's due a Bronze Star, but won't actually receive it.

My brother-in-law was a drill seargant in the Marines. His dad was on the California when it was sunk at Pearl Harbor.

[~Chad~ 0]

The marines are great! I am proud that they are part of the Navy!!

i've heard the term "navy mattress" used for marines.........

The Marines.... Department of the navy..... Men's department!

[Jasman0717 9]

The marines are great! I am proud that they are part of the Navy!!

i've heard the term "navy mattress" used for marines.........

Those that started that story are just jealous because they couldn't qualify for the Corps so went to the Navy. The British Navy would have been a mess without the British Royal Marines

[Ban Hammer 13,352]

The marines are great! I am proud that they are part of the Navy!!

i've heard the term "navy mattress" used for marines.........

Those that started that story are just jealous because they couldn't qualify for the Corps so went to the Navy. The British Navy would have been a mess without the British Royal Marines

ah nothing like some interservice rivalry to lighten up vj

[Jasman0717 9]

The marines are great! I am proud that they are part of the Navy!!

i've heard the term "navy mattress" used for marines.........

Those that started that story are just jealous because they couldn't qualify for the Corps so went to the Navy. The British Navy would have been a mess without the British Royal Marines

ah nothing like some interservice rivalry to lighten up vj

Its always been going on....sea going bell hops virsa taxi drivers

Edited November 3, 2007 by jasman0717

[~PalmTreeGurl~ 154]

on my biological side... grandfather served in WWII Marine Corps, Cousin served in Marines for 8yrs, baby bro served in Marines... on adopted side Aunt served in Marines, cousin and his wife in Airforce, childhood friend in Airforce and in Korea

on extended family side 3 uncles served in Navy and one in Airforce and one friend in Army served in Iraq...

Im thankful for all that served... but I always liked the Marines best

[Jasman0717 9]

on my biological side... grandfather served in WWII Marine Corps, Cousin served in Marines for 8yrs, baby bro served in Marines... on adopted side Aunt served in Marines, cousin and his wife in Airforce, childhood friend in Airforce and in Korea

on extended family side 3 uncles served in Navy and one in Airforce and one friend in Army served in Iraq...

Im thankful for all that served... but I always liked the Marines best

Semper Fi - Band of Brothers