New to the site - Just a newbie

[phatmadame81 0]

welcome to VJ Teena, and goood luck on yours and Kevin's journey.

ask away.

[Teena 0]

Hi! Welcome to VJ! I agree...ask any questions you have. There is the Yardie thread with tons of people at all stages of the process...feel free to join us there

So if you don't mind my asking...how long have you been together? How many times have you been to JA? Have a great trip next week...I am so jealous Eat all the food you can

I don't mind telling you that we have been together a month and this is my second trip to JA next week. We talk about all of the obstacles that will come our way, but we both know that if we can get through this process and stay committed that we will be fine. I have been married previously and divorced for over three years. Kevin has never been married. He has two kids. It is strange because when I met him all of my check lists (the superficial ones) went out the window. He just has a really good heart and is a nice guy. I can not explain it, but I left my heart in Jamaica when I left. It is still there and will be there until I get back. Chat soon.

Girl, no worries. Don't mind what anybody says about your relationship and how long you have been together. I fell in love with Mike before I even met him in person. We started our friendship over the phone, then I met him and it was alright. Just follow your heart. If anything is off the chart, you will know. Best of luck and safe journey.

Thanks for the encouragement. Kevin has such a good heart and was eager to meet his ENTIRE family before I went home the first time. He is not perfect, but sincere. Negativity is not in our spheres. We are working on keeping us together.

[Yaads 0]

Hi! Welcome to VJ! I agree...ask any questions you have. There is the Yardie thread with tons of people at all stages of the process...feel free to join us there

So if you don't mind my asking...how long have you been together? How many times have you been to JA? Have a great trip next week...I am so jealous Eat all the food you can

I don't mind telling you that we have been together a month and this is my second trip to JA next week. We talk about all of the obstacles that will come our way, but we both know that if we can get through this process and stay committed that we will be fine. I have been married previously and divorced for over three years. Kevin has never been married. He has two kids. It is strange because when I met him all of my check lists (the superficial ones) went out the window. He just has a really good heart and is a nice guy. I can not explain it, but I left my heart in Jamaica when I left. It is still there and will be there until I get back. Chat soon.

Girl, no worries. Don't mind what anybody says about your relationship and how long you have been together. I fell in love with Mike before I even met him in person. We started our friendship over the phone, then I met him and it was alright. Just follow your heart. If anything is off the chart, you will know. Best of luck and safe journey.

Thanks for the encouragement. Kevin has such a good heart and was eager to meet his ENTIRE family before I went home the first time. He is not perfect, but sincere. Negativity is not in our spheres. We are working on keeping us together.

That's a great attitude to have I agree...follow your heart and your head and be smart about everything...and don't let others get you down.

I hope you have a great trip next week! Are you guys going to get married in JA and then file or are you going to file a fiance visa and get married here? If you need any help with all the paperwork I know there are a ton of us who don't mind helping out. VJ is a great resource

Edited November 1, 2007 by Yardiewife

[Teena 0]

Hi! Welcome to VJ! I agree...ask any questions you have. There is the Yardie thread with tons of people at all stages of the process...feel free to join us there

So if you don't mind my asking...how long have you been together? How many times have you been to JA? Have a great trip next week...I am so jealous Eat all the food you can

I don't mind telling you that we have been together a month and this is my second trip to JA next week. We talk about all of the obstacles that will come our way, but we both know that if we can get through this process and stay committed that we will be fine. I have been married previously and divorced for over three years. Kevin has never been married. He has two kids. It is strange because when I met him all of my check lists (the superficial ones) went out the window. He just has a really good heart and is a nice guy. I can not explain it, but I left my heart in Jamaica when I left. It is still there and will be there until I get back. Chat soon.

Girl, no worries. Don't mind what anybody says about your relationship and how long you have been together. I fell in love with Mike before I even met him in person. We started our friendship over the phone, then I met him and it was alright. Just follow your heart. If anything is off the chart, you will know. Best of luck and safe journey.

Thanks for the encouragement. Kevin has such a good heart and was eager to meet his ENTIRE family before I went home the first time. He is not perfect, but sincere. Negativity is not in our spheres. We are working on keeping us together.

That's a great attitude to have I agree...follow your heart and your head and be smart about everything...and don't let others get you down.

I hope you have a great trip next week! Are you guys going to get married in JA and then file or are you going to file a fiance visa and get married here? If you need any help with all the paperwork I know there are a ton of us who don't mind helping out. VJ is a great resource

I want to get married here in the States, but the whole wedding thing is not my cup of tea. I did the big wedding thing for my first husband so I am not impressed about the entire ordeal. I am praying that God gives me a sensible solution...if there is any such thing in dealing with weddings Kevin of course wants a wedding (he has never been married before), but is more concerned about his family in the states and his mother in JA. He is an only child by his mother so they are very close. We will try to work something out. You know I was telling Kevin about this site and then I started tripping on him because of the negative vibes and comments from people. He said that the site is making me doubt him. He wanted to know who started this site and wanted to know if it was created to be a source of discouragement. I am not saying that I am not going to visit the site for information, but I can not let other people's experiences dictate how I treat my man and make me paranoid and crazy. Let me know your thoughts on this.

Teena

[nyseness 0]

This site is used for many different reasons esp in the Yardie thread. We are not here to discourage anyone so please don't take it that way. Basically the Yardie thread was created an outlet for JA/US couples to vent, share experiences, and obtain countless info regarding the immigration process.

[JA Tam 7]

This site is used for many different reasons esp in the Yardie thread. We are not here to discourage anyone so please don't take it that way. Basically the Yardie thread was created an outlet for JA/US couples to vent, share experiences, and obtain countless info regarding the immigration process.

Ditto. I certainly empathised with a lot of the experiences that were shared by fellow VJ members, but I have never taken any of this out on Aaron. A lot of the "negative" experiences that are shared on VJ should serve as a word of caution for those who are going through the process. I have received more encouragement on here than any negative vibes. I am sorry that you may have experienced that, but it is certainly not what we are about

[Marlita 0]

Hello Everyone,

I am so new at this that my "husband" and I will be on-line tonight filling out the 129F. I will be traveling to JA next week - to stay in Negril for a week. I want to play, but I know we must take care of our business too. Kevin has so many plans and his mother wants to cook everyday. I will let them lead since I am trying to chill and go along with their flow. Just wanted to get acquainted with some good people so I do not feel like I am in this journey in the states alone. No one seems to understand...but then again....I have not told a lot of people about our relationship just yet. Advice anyone:)

Teena

Hello and welcome.

My word of advice is to follow your head more than your heart. The heart can be very deceiving and many people do unsettling things in the fit of passion (good and bad). So even though love is what keeps you together let your head lead your heart in the right direction. I would also say, if you are a Christian, to look to God for advice not people so much cause He will not lead you wrong. The feeling of sureness from Him will ease your mind if you start to feel confused. God is not the author of confusion so if you are confused that is a sure sign that He is not in the relationship.

As far as this site....VJ has a great wealth of information and supplies a meeting place for all of us going through the immigration process whether for a spouse, child, mother, brother, etc. so I think its great. The only thing to remember is it is an open forum for people to express their experiences, views, opinions and many times those may not agree with yourself. Just know that, and do not take them as personal.

One thing that I do notice is how VJ may only show one side to all the many options you have when meeting someone from overseas. I am sure many people looked at your story and thought...wow, 1 month thats really quick.....1 trip....thats not enough time. On VJ we see the option is that you meet someone wonderful and you want to spend the rest of your lives together after only knowing each other for such a short while....so what do you do...file a K1 visa and get your SO over to be with you as soon as you can. That could work for you and it could be very detrimental also. Introducing the idea of permanent immigration into the mix of a fresh relationship can seemingly cause things to be a bit unbalanced. Of course you want a "normal" relationship and courtship like if you were living in the same town...but you can't. Just don't let immigration be your FIRST way of combatting this obstacle. I'm not saying that you are doing any of these things but letting you know that you have many other options. I would also think its a good idea to be JUST like Kevin and his family. You should introduce Kevin to your family outright from the beginning....no secrets, no hiding. They may not understand (which you have to know is understandable),but don't hide him from them. If he really loves you, he will want to know them just as much as you want to know his family (as he should). You'll have to deal with the drama of family not understanding the relationship eventually anyway, thats why I say just do it early on so that they can then begin to process it more and more as they see your realtionship grows before Kevin gets here. No need to have him move to an entire new country and then have to deal with shady in-laws.....I wouldn't want to have to deal with that if I moved for someone.

My last word of advice (I know, I know....I'm getting preachy) is to live the way Kevin lives as much as possible when you visit him. Its the best way to get a real feel of his lifestyle and day to day. You'll get an idea of the culture which will help you tremendously in the long run.

Ok I said my two-cents.....now I go in peace

[*JG* 2]

Good luck. It's a long, tough, frustrating, expensive road. In the end, it can be wonderful.