Need advice with Mexican fiancée

[Math Man 6]

Hi all,

I recently got engaged to a wonderful woman who lives in Chetumal, Mexico. At the time I proposed I knew nothing about the immigration issues involved, but I've been reading quite a bit about them over the past week or so. Based on my readings, here are some options I've considered. (The boldface text is for questions that I hope you can answer.)

Option 1: I'll start with the option that is probably best from an immigration standpoint, but which we can't do because of religious reasons. This option is to obtain a K-1 visa, bring my fiancée to the U.S. and have a civil wedding, and then return to Mexico to have a Catholic wedding so that her family and relatives can attend. The problem is that my fiancée and her family are opposed to her and me living together in the U.S. before the Catholic wedding is held, since this would violate the laws of the Church. There's no point in trying to change their minds--it won't work--but I wanted you all to know that I've at least considered this option.

Option 2: With this option, I would file for a K-1 visa and, in the meantime, have the Catholic wedding (but not the civil wedding) in Mexico. However, I have two questions:

Question: Some random website I read (I don't remember which) claimed that it wasn't possible in Mexico to have a Catholic wedding without first having a civil wedding. Is this true? If so, then Option 2 is out.

Question: Even if it IS possible to have the Catholic wedding in Mexico before my fiancée comes to the United States for the civil wedding, is it advisable from an immigration standpoint? Everything I've read indicates that a Catholic wedding in Mexico is not a legal wedding, and we wouldn't be married in the eyes of the Mexican government (and therefore in the eyes of the U.S. government, either). So it doesn't appear that having a Catholic wedding prior to my fiancée coming to the U.S. would mess up the K-1 visa. Is this correct?

Option 3: The last option is for us to have a civil wedding in Mexico and then for me to return to the U.S. and file for a K-3 spousal visa (rather than the K-1). Several months after the civil wedding we'd have the Catholic wedding, and then I'd have to wait for my spouse in the U.S. until she was granted the K-3. But this leads to the following question:

Question: How difficult is it for an American man to get married (civilly) to a Mexican woman in Mexico? I've found several websites that describe the various items I'd need to provide, but I haven't gotten a sense of how long it would take. Is it something I could accomplish in, say, one 10-day trip? I know I have to get permission to marry from the Mexican government, but I don't know how long that takes.

Thanks in advance for your help,

Matt

[PMRS 0]

Congratulations!

You have many of the same questions and wonderings I had a year and half ago.

You could have a Catholic wedding in Mexico, which is not legally recognized in Mexico, then pursue a K-1 fiancee visa. Only civil weddings are legally recognized in Mexico. However, you will have to be careful with USCIS. You don't want to be applying for a K-1 visa if you're already married. So, if you pursue this route, don't show any photos or evidence from your Catholic wedding.

The K-3 is also an option, which is what we pursued because it seemed easier to me (at the time) then pursuing a K-1 visa. It took us 8 months to get it, whereas K-1's take about 6 months. It would have been quicker for us had we turned in the I-129F sooner. The CR-1/IR-1 immigrant visas take over a year to get.

You will need to get permission to marry from the Mexican government. You'll apply for permission at the immigration office closest to where you'll get married. It typically takes a month to get permission. We were lucky because my suegro went to law school with the director of the immigration office located in my husband's hometown, so we were able to pick up our permission letter the next day. It costs about a $100 dollars to get permission. I tried to contact the Mexican consulate in San Francisco to see if they could help me start this process from here in the U.S., but I didn't have any luck doing so.

Another question... have you had your baptism, first communion, and confirmation with the Catholic church? The priest at my husband's church said I needed to have all of these sacraments before getting married in the Catholic church. So, I'm taking class for my confirmation before we have our big wedding.

Good luck!

[Gaby&Talbert 1]

Fortunately I didn't have that problem but I see your difficulties. We had a civil wedding and then filed for the K3 visa. It only took 6 months. We married in El Paso, TX so the permission in Mexico wasn't needed. My wife and I are going to have a Catolic wedding next summer but in the US because it is much easier in the US than in Mexico. Fortunately my wife's family wasn't too strict about it.

[Math Man 6]

Thanks to everyone for their helpful replies. After some thought, my fiancée and I have decided to pursue Option 3 described in my original post (i.e., have the civil wedding in Mexico, apply for a K-3 visa, and then have the Catholic wedding in Mexico at a later date--probably in July 2008). I've already highlighted the problem with Option 1 (her parents would kill me if we lived together before the Catholic wedding), and it turns out that Option 2 won't work because you really do need to be married civilly before a priest in Mexico will marry you in the Church (it's the law!).

Talbert--I did have another question for you. You said that it's easier to have a Catholic wedding in the U.S. than in Mexico. How so? I was engaged (but didn't get married) to a different Catholic woman in the past, so I know how much of a hassle it is to get married in the Church in the U.S. Is the process even worse in Mexico?

Thanks,

Matt

[PpZap 0]

About having the church wedding without the civil wedding in Mexico, the answers is yes, it is possible. I am Mexican too and am in the same boat. We talked to the priest and he requested permission to the local bishop to marry us without the civil wedding due to immigration proceedings. Permission was granted without a problem.

Hope this helps.

[Gaby&Talbert 1]

Thanks to everyone for their helpful replies. After some thought, my fiancée and I have decided to pursue Option 3 described in my original post (i.e., have the civil wedding in Mexico, apply for a K-3 visa, and then have the Catholic wedding in Mexico at a later date--probably in July 2008). I've already highlighted the problem with Option 1 (her parents would kill me if we lived together before the Catholic wedding), and it turns out that Option 2 won't work because you really do need to be married civilly before a priest in Mexico will marry you in the Church (it's the law!).

Talbert--I did have another question for you. You said that it's easier to have a Catholic wedding in the U.S. than in Mexico. How so? I was engaged (but didn't get married) to a different Catholic woman in the past, so I know how much of a hassle it is to get married in the Church in the U.S. Is the process even worse in Mexico?

Thanks,

Matt

Yes everything is more difficult in Mexico with theCatholic Church. My wife has been checking into it also for our baby's baptism. The chuch is the US doesn't have near the requirements as they do in Mexico. I would suggest talking with the church here and there to see how the requirements are different.

[zeroland 0]

Thanks to everyone for their helpful replies. After some thought, my fiancée and I have decided to pursue Option 3 described in my original post (i.e., have the civil wedding in Mexico, apply for a K-3 visa, and then have the Catholic wedding in Mexico at a later date--probably in July 2008). I've already highlighted the problem with Option 1 (her parents would kill me if we lived together before the Catholic wedding), and it turns out that Option 2 won't work because you really do need to be married civilly before a priest in Mexico will marry you in the Church (it's the law!).

Talbert--I did have another question for you. You said that it's easier to have a Catholic wedding in the U.S. than in Mexico. How so? I was engaged (but didn't get married) to a different Catholic woman in the past, so I know how much of a hassle it is to get married in the Church in the U.S. Is the process even worse in Mexico?

Thanks,

Matt

Yes everything is more difficult in Mexico with theCatholic Church. My wife has been checking into it also for our baby's baptism. The chuch is the US doesn't have near the requirements as they do in Mexico. I would suggest talking with the church here and there to see how the requirements are different.

Wow, I'm feeling lucky. My fiancee was raised Cathoic but longer goes to church. We are just going to do a civil service here in the states. Her parents aren't crazy about it, but aren't going to try to stop it either. Then again, my fiancee is divorced, and her Mom told her to never get married again....Jajaja so much for her and giving advice...

Edited November 5, 2007 by zeroland

[tabta 0]

I know I may be a little late with this but I feel that I can add something. Me and my husband had a civil wedding in Mexico and it was one of the most stressful situations. You have to go to the Oficina de Migracion and ask for permission to marry a mexican. You have to take a birth certificate that has an apostille. You also have to pay like 300. In the end we were denied and we had to reschedule. They said the letter we wrote asking for permission wasnt correct because we put we plan on getting married on a certain date instead of we are going to get married on that date. The whole process took about 3 weeks. I would reccommend getting a Lawyer if possible. The paper work is fairly simple (I did it myself) but I also visited the immigration office 6 times during those 3 weeks.

[Math Man 6]

Hi tabta,

I just checked this thread for the first time in a while and noticed your reply. Thanks for sharing your experience. I have to admit that the Mexican civil wedding is stressing me out simply because it's the one step in the process where I have to deal with a foreign government, and from a great distance away! Getting the K-3 after that seems pretty easy by comparison.

I do have a question. What exactly is an apostille? Is that just the raised insignia stamped on the birth certificate that indicates its authenticity, or is it a whole separate document?

Thanks,

Matt