shipping them back and you are pregnant

[doodlebug 3]

I believe she did tell his family.

I do see what you're saying. I sacrafice a LOT to keep my children's dad in their lives. The sacrafice here would be the anger inside from knowing this scumbag will get to stay in the US, but the payoff is that even though he shouldn't have that luxury of living here his son won't suffer not having a dad because of his dad's mistakes. If that makes sense.

Every week I suck in the hatred I feel for my ex so that my kids can have a semi-normal life. I don't want them to suffer just because of him. And even though he's a royal d-head he still is their dad.

[Dakine 26]

fathers are important to the emotional life of a child and are not interchangable.

If you mean biological fathers I'm calling bullsh!t on that.

I adopted my stepdaughter and we are a "father daughter team".

Just because a guy squirted doen't have anything to do with how good a parent and father he is.

Yeah! She calls me "daddy". BIGTIME!

[PetraPerson101 0]

but deporting someone cause they cheat on you is also taking this baby away from their dad quite possibly forever....something to ponder.. Is your love for the baby more than your rage at betrayal?

Huh?

Do you think it's appropriate to put a child through having a father who is abusive & disrespectful to the child's mother? Seeing someone wronging their mother, abusing her, and not having anything that they can do about it? To look at this so-called "father" - and learn "is a normal thing" to act like this "man"? You'd be psychologically torturing the child on a daily basis. That's just wrong.

What's more traumatizing: Losing a sorry excuse for a father - or seeing a good mother lose her self-respect and dignity -and- the child potentially becoming the abuser/abused of the future?

If you're with someone bad - trash em. Don't give them the time of day - let them take all their junk and leave. There's someone much better out there for you, don't degrade yourself or encourage someone else to by sticking with trash.

And besides - we have enough trash people in the US as is. We don't need to import more from other countries. If you find someone is a nasty person, let them get out of the country - they don't deserve the honor of being a US resident.

[chaishai 1]

Only thing I will say is..... to stay in a bad relationship because of a child or children is a very bad thing to do... it will have a very negative effect on the child and that is worse than them not know their father... sorry but all this stay together for the child because you are being a bad person to deprive the child of its father is just #######...

If the man only samples the goods at home then there is no problems, if the man like to sample everyone else's goods then the man is a problem...

Kez

but deporting someone cause they cheat on you is also taking this baby away from their dad quite possibly forever....something to ponder.. Is your love for the baby more than your rage at betrayal?

WAHRANIA. He said he wanted her to get an ABORTION. Clearly this is more than just "taking a baby away from its dad" give me a break and let it rest.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

Only thing I will say is..... to stay in a bad relationship because of a child or children is a very bad thing to do... it will have a very negative effect on the child and that is worse than them not know their father... sorry but all this stay together for the child because you are being a bad person to deprive the child of its father is just #######...

If the man only samples the goods at home then there is no problems, if the man like to sample everyone else's goods then the man is a problem...

Kez

but deporting someone cause they cheat on you is also taking this baby away from their dad quite possibly forever....something to ponder.. Is your love for the baby more than your rage at betrayal?

WAHRANIA. He said he wanted her to get an ABORTION. Clearly this is more than just "taking a baby away from its dad" give me a break and let it rest.

that was the other case.......there are several cases on here

[chasnik 0]

Obviously there is more going on here than just the passive reader will ever know....that said yes if it can be done its a great thing to have mom and dad both still in the picture...my kids and my ex husband and I do outings...thankgsgiving and xmas with us and whoever he is dating now...this is what I do to give my kids stability...he did not ever ask me to abort my children...he did cheat on me..this is something I can handle. Not everyone can. And families can be interchangable. I am adopted....not my biological family and most of the people my kids call aunt uncle etc are just friends...chosen family...family does not always equal stability as I think we all have seen in our lifetimes...in the end everyone must do what is best for them. No one else knows that but the people involved. If he does go back to Morocco that doesnt end the fact that this child is his and can still have contact with the family...they wont all cease to exist if he goes back..maybe harder to have contact but the same can be said for parents who live in the same city!!! Just mho

[ya falaha! 0]

Amen and thank you.

but deporting someone cause they cheat on you is also taking this baby away from their dad quite possibly forever....something to ponder.. Is your love for the baby more than your rage at betrayal?

Huh?

Do you think it's appropriate to put a child through having a father who is abusive & disrespectful to the child's mother? Seeing someone wronging their mother, abusing her, and not having anything that they can do about it? To look at this so-called "father" - and learn "is a normal thing" to act like this "man"? You'd be psychologically torturing the child on a daily basis. That's just wrong.

What's more traumatizing: Losing a sorry excuse for a father - or seeing a good mother lose her self-respect and dignity -and- the child potentially becoming the abuser/abused of the future?

If you're with someone bad - trash em. Don't give them the time of day - let them take all their junk and leave. There's someone much better out there for you, don't degrade yourself or encourage someone else to by sticking with trash.

And besides - we have enough trash people in the US as is. We don't need to import more from other countries. If you find someone is a nasty person, let them get out of the country - they don't deserve the honor of being a US resident.

[Alhamdulillah 0]

Nevermind

Edited October 25, 2007 by Alhamdulillah

[JODO 2]

Wahrania was it you who posted that you have an ex-husband in the US who you and or our government have no idea where he is now?

[allousa 1]

About this whole airing of laundry.... Has this been a common occurance on mena through the years? One spouse posting and then saying their whole lives and then the other party coming on and answering? I dont know because I have only been here 6 months and never saw it before and all of the sudden people are sending smoke signals to wayward husbands....through posts and people fighting online... and then between the girl with the dead womans fiancee and everthing else I have seen, it seems like MENA has become its own soap opera with plot twists...and cheaters.. and pregnancies.... and dead people... and I just dont know

I'm REALLY not trying to be ugly, but are you not perpetuating the whole "soap opera" thing by devoting a whole topic about it?

[JODO 2]

About this whole airing of laundry.... Has this been a common occurance on mena through the years? One spouse posting and then saying their whole lives and then the other party coming on and answering? I dont know because I have only been here 6 months and never saw it before and all of the sudden people are sending smoke signals to wayward husbands....through posts and people fighting online... and then between the girl with the dead womans fiancee and everthing else I have seen, it seems like MENA has become its own soap opera with plot twists...and cheaters.. and pregnancies.... and dead people... and I just dont know

I'm REALLY not trying to be ugly, but are you not perpetuating the whole "soap opera" thing by devoting a whole topic about it?

Exactly.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

Wahrania was it you who posted that you have an ex-husband in the US who you and or our government have no idea where he is now?

I dont know where he is because he has a permanent injunction for domestic violence and has multiple financial judgements against him from other people but I am pretty sure the USA knows where he is. You would be very surprised as to what homeland security knows....What does that have to do with this post?

About this whole airing of laundry.... Has this been a common occurance on mena through the years? One spouse posting and then saying their whole lives and then the other party coming on and answering? I dont know because I have only been here 6 months and never saw it before and all of the sudden people are sending smoke signals to wayward husbands....through posts and people fighting online... and then between the girl with the dead womans fiancee and everthing else I have seen, it seems like MENA has become its own soap opera with plot twists...and cheaters.. and pregnancies.... and dead people... and I just dont know

I'm REALLY not trying to be ugly, but are you not perpetuating the whole "soap opera" thing by devoting a whole topic about it?

I am commenting on it certainly not perpetuating it. I also could never imagine trying to talk to someone I loved through posts...

[Ban Hammer 13,489]

I am commenting on it certainly not perpetuating it. I also could never imagine trying to talk to someone I loved through posts...

same difference isn't it?

[JODO 2]

Wahrania was it you who posted that you have an ex-husband in the US who you and or our government have no idea where he is now?

I dont know where he is because he has a permanent injunction for domestic violence and has multiple financial judgements against him from other people but I am pretty sure the USA knows where he is. You would be very surprised as to what homeland security knows....What does that have to do with this post?

About this whole airing of laundry.... Has this been a common occurance on mena through the years? One spouse posting and then saying their whole lives and then the other party coming on and answering? I dont know because I have only been here 6 months and never saw it before and all of the sudden people are sending smoke signals to wayward husbands....through posts and people fighting online... and then between the girl with the dead womans fiancee and everthing else I have seen, it seems like MENA has become its own soap opera with plot twists...and cheaters.. and pregnancies.... and dead people... and I just dont know

I'm REALLY not trying to be ugly, but are you not perpetuating the whole "soap opera" thing by devoting a whole topic about it?

I am commenting on it certainly not perpetuating it. I also could never imagine trying to talk to someone I loved through posts...

Wahrania, you are advocating some pretty irresponsible behavior here. You have an ex-husband whom you have no idea where he is and DHS may or may not know where he is at this time. Now, you want other women here in this dire situations to keep their philanderers/abusers here just because they are being "selfish"for feeling betrayed? And what if the whereabouts of their husband/ex-husband become unknown like yours did? How about their husbands betrayed and broke their trust and have already shown that they do not hold the family in high esteem. Some of these women could possibly be financially responsible for a man who may or may not turn out to be a deadbeat at that! I just believe you are advocating some pretty irresponsible behavior on this board. Lastly I think it is unfortunate that you chose to create this thread. We have members here who created alternate Id's because they did not feel comfortable posting under their account and Mags asked the other couple to take it privately.Now I know your husband is not here yet,but if you are going to post here you should at least try to make it constructive. Oh and if someone is going to claim victim hood,it would be a good idea if he or she had clean hands.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

Obviously there is more going on here than just the passive reader will ever know....that said yes if it can be done its a great thing to have mom and dad both still in the picture...my kids and my ex husband and I do outings...thankgsgiving and xmas with us and whoever he is dating now...this is what I do to give my kids stability...he did not ever ask me to abort my children...he did cheat on me..this is something I can handle. Not everyone can. And families can be interchangable. I am adopted....not my biological family and most of the people my kids call aunt uncle etc are just friends...chosen family...family does not always equal stability as I think we all have seen in our lifetimes...in the end everyone must do what is best for them. No one else knows that but the people involved. If he does go back to Morocco that doesnt end the fact that this child is his and can still have contact with the family...they wont all cease to exist if he goes back..maybe harder to have contact but the same can be said for parents who live in the same city!!! Just mho

I have not heard one person on this board other than doodle talk about the benefits of sometimes swallowing things to do right by the child.

Not one person has mentioned the man's family or the grandmother or their role in any of this/..

Its like no one cares about the baby's grandmother and the aunts.. this is sad