Things your husband/fiance does that drives you crazy.

[Nutty 2]

YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT, AMIRA

My husband is perfect and for that reason I do not have anything to complain about. Really I don't belong on this thread. But then it's a club I prefer to be in.

I did agree with you initially. In response to your post that he was extremely lazy and I said that your lucky to have a mother in law who is on your side. It was supportive of you really. Because I have seen many women abused and mistreated by husbands and not cared for by husbands families in anyway.

Yes, you being an Arab, I'm sure you can teach me a thing or two about Jordanian culture (only guessing).

But please don't come down on me, when you are the one that called him lazy. Not me. I only tried to find some other reason for the behavior.

You didn't agree with me first of all. You were trying to school me on MENA culture because your husband is Iranian and because you lived in India. Well live where ever you want and marry whoever you want but I guarantee you I will still be the one teaching you about MENA culture. The mena culture you are describing is not as common as you think anymore. Also, if you had simply agreed that was lazy, I would be fine with that. However to say that he might not upholding his husbandly duties and is demanding. You are not qualified to say that.

By the way, since your husband is so perfect as you stated earlier I guess you really have no reason to be in this thread.

I wanted to say....if you put on the web comments about your husband that he's extremely lazy that who am I to disagree. But then don't go getting uppity because I agreed with you.

That middle eastern and south asian cultures are more traditional in their expectations of mens and womens roles in marriage...??

[AngelK96 0]

Gosh my husband is perfect too, and so am I. So therefore I will not post what drives me crazy cuz you know we both are sooo perfect. That dang perfect pampered ME arab male

[Nutty 2]

My response to you was from this comment:

It's good your Mother in law is there to see how you two live together. She'll be happy to see you caring and pampering her son. But on the other hand she should also be in your corner when he becomes lazy, petulent or demanding. Especially if he is not handling his "Husband" responsibilities or providing HOUSE AND SUPPORT which is the traditional duties of a husband.

--------------------------------------------------

I guess this is where writing "on the fly" comes in....

Please look at what you bolded...I said if becomes lazy, petulent or demanding..." But this was in response to you calling him extremely lazy and being annoyed by this habit.

Please also look at the key word...."IF"

I did not say your husband was not handling his "husbandly duties.." I said IF. IF he was not taking care of you that your mother in law should be supportive of you.

I never said he WAS NOT TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS.

Edited October 27, 2007 by Nutty

[Jenn! 918]

Argh, get the quotes right!!!!

[♥JP♥ 5]

It must be nice for you to be wearing rose colored glasses. News flash, no one is perfect.

Again, my comments were not bcz you agreed that he was lazy (in the end) but because of this comment:

Especially if he is not handling his "Husband" responsibilities or providing HOUSE AND SUPPORT which is the traditional duties of a husband.

YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT, AMIRA

My husband is perfect and for that reason I do not have anything to complain about. Really I don't belong on this thread. But then it's a club I prefer to be in.

I did agree with you initially. In response to your post that he was extremely lazy and I said that your lucky to have a mother in law who is on your side. It was supportive of you really. Because I have seen many women abused and mistreated by husbands and not cared for by husbands families in anyway.

Yes, you being an Arab, I'm sure you can teach me a thing or two about Jordanian culture (only guessing).

But please don't come down on me, when you are the one that called him lazy. Not me. I only tried to find some other reason for the behavior.

You didn't agree with me first of all. You were trying to school me on MENA culture because your husband is Iranian and because you lived in India. Well live where ever you want and marry whoever you want but I guarantee you I will still be the one teaching you about MENA culture. The mena culture you are describing is not as common as you think anymore. Also, if you had simply agreed that was lazy, I would be fine with that. However to say that he might not upholding his husbandly duties and is demanding. You are not qualified to say that.

By the way, since your husband is so perfect as you stated earlier I guess you really have no reason to be in this thread.

[♥JP♥ 5]

[i guess this is where writing "on the fly" comes in....

Please look at what you bolded...I said if becomes lazy, petulent or demanding..." But this was in response to you calling him extremely lazy and being annoyed by this habit.

Please also look at the key word...."IF"

I did not say your husband was not handling his "husbandly duties.." I said IF. IF he was not taking care of you that your mother in law should be supportive of you.

I never said he WAS NOT TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS.

Can you please figure out how to quote?

Thanks for the lecture mom, but I think I can handle my marriage on my own. You don't need to worry about him handling his husbandly duties and you don't need to worry about me marrying a self professed lazy man.

[doodlebug 3]

nutty...can you learn how to use the quote feature? It's so difficult to know what you're typing and what you're quoting.

This was a lighthearted thread made to offset the warm and fuzzy thread which was made to offset the girl who's moroccan left her even though they're back together.

I don't think this thread was meant to analyze why some mena men do this that or the other thing.

[mybackpages 0]

Gosh my husband is perfect too, and so am I. So therefore I will not post what drives me crazy cuz you know we both are sooo perfect. That dang perfect pampered ME arab male

Never said any husband was perfect. Some husbands may not have any problem with this thread and see it as a lighthearted jab at their quirks. BUT many MENA men would be embarrassed. Let your husbands read this thread and come to their own conclusions. I wont be posting not because my husband is perfect, but because of respect.

[Nutty 2]

[i guess this is where writing "on the fly" comes in....

Please look at what you bolded...I said if becomes lazy, petulent or demanding..." But this was in response to you calling him extremely lazy and being annoyed by this habit.

Please also look at the key word...."IF"

I did not say your husband was not handling his "husbandly duties.." I said IF. IF he was not taking care of you that your mother in law should be supportive of you.

I never said he WAS NOT TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS.

Can you please figure out how to quote?

Thanks for the lecture mom, but I think I can handle my marriage on my own. You don't need to worry about him handling his husbandly duties and you don't need to worry about me marrying a self professed lazy man.

Thank you. Your welcome. I am certainly not worried for you in anyway.

[Nutty 2]

I just wantd to say Nutty is not the only one to read these comments this way.

When I read I thought wow how different from what my husband would do. and I admit I saw the same generalization of the pampered Arab ME man. My husband and i even had a conversation about it.

He saw what I saw and admited of course his mother would bring him things without having to get up, but yet he does the difference between the right and wrong way to treat people.

I guess I just dont find the humor or any sweetness in a wife griping about her husband's behavior even in jest in a public way.

Who asked you to see the sweetness in it? My mom brings me things without having to get up too. By the way so does my husband. We do things for each other without the other asking. We do things for each other when its requested as well. I never said he demanded anything from me.

Thats great that you think your husband is different but I'm sure he has his own set of quirks as well.

Dear Amira,

Please look at your original post...You said your husband REPEATEDLY CALLS FOR YOU when your busy.

There is a difference between asking someone to bring you a glass of water when your free. To that of continually calling for you when you are obviously busy and for such a simple thing as a glass of water.

Please don't be offended, but it does portray a negative impression of your husband.

[AngelK96 0]

Gosh my husband is perfect too, and so am I. So therefore I will not post what drives me crazy cuz you know we both are sooo perfect. That dang perfect pampered ME arab male

Never said any husband was perfect. Some husbands may not have any problem with this thread and see it as a lighthearted jab at their quirks. BUT many MENA men would be embarrassed. Let your husbands read this thread and come to their own conclusions. I wont be posting not because my husband is perfect, but because of respect.

My husband has read this thread. Wasn't embarassed in the least. He thought a lot of the things were funny to be exact, and could see himself in some of the things the ladies posted. Why should the truth be embarassing nothing disrespectful about it. If people want to share their little pet peeves they have about their husband so what? You shouldn't worry about what other wives say about their husbands or fiances because they don't live in your house. I am sure you are speaking for a minority when you say "BUT many MENA men would be embarrassed?

[Nutty 2]

nutty...can you learn how to use the quote feature? It's so difficult to know what you're typing and what you're quoting.

This was a lighthearted thread made to offset the warm and fuzzy thread which was made to offset the girl who's moroccan left her even though they're back together.

I don't think this thread was meant to analyze why some mena men do this that or the other thing.

Sorry about not using the quote feature before. I struggle at times to use this page.

[Angel7422 0]

He spits out of the car window

Arggghhh, mine does that too. But that's okay. One of these days Im going to slam on the breaks and its going to fly back and hit him in the face

HAHAHAHA, that is too funny Can you imagine the look on his face? Something like this or this . Which do you think?

[aisha kandisha 0]

And on the flip side of this, many women are expected to accept and forgive their husbands regardless of what they do. In Jordan especially people make tons of excuses for men. When I was there, my cousin and her fiance broke off their engagment due to the fact that he was a complete bafoon. However everyone was defending his actions saying he did them out of love. Now he did some downright stupid shyt. Men are held up on a much higher pedestal overthere.

You didn't agree with me first of all. You were trying to school me on MENA culture because your husband is Iranian and because you lived in India. Well live where ever you want and marry whoever you want but I guarantee you I will still be the one teaching you about MENA culture. The mena culture you are describing is not as common as you think anymore. Also, if you had simply agreed that was lazy, I would be fine with that. However to say that he might not upholding his husbandly duties and is demanding. You are not qualified to say that.

By the way, since your husband is so perfect as you stated earlier I guess you really have no reason to be in this thread.

I am confuzzled about what stereotypes are acceptable because it seems to change by the hour.

I have figured out one thing though "people make tons of excuses for men" here too. Thankfully we are have an expert to teach us about MENA culture. BTW, how much time have you spent in the NA and countries other than Jordan?

[Bassi and Zainab 1]

Yea I would second that chaishai - My husband had 6 older sisters and a mother who doted on him, but not subservient by any means. And let me tell you I wear the pants in our family. Like she said - there's not a chance i'd be getting an allowance from him. I think that most of his issue comes from entering a country that operates on a credit/electronic money system vs. cash system. Also he's not use to having to pay for utilities, as most of those are combined (like heat, water, etc) in the cost of housing. They have a satellite so don't pay for tv and recharge their cell phones when empty. That's not how things operate here.

Bassi has a really really hard time with that and I know it will get worse once he's here permanently. He just doesn't understand the "fake" money system. Don't spend any money that you don't have. Since I kind of like that system and prefer to get out of debt as much as I can, I'm working towards it then we'll both be happier. But it's hard for him to understand the mortgage on the house and why didn't I just save up and buy the land then build the house. I'm trying to get him to understand that I wanted to get into the house before I was old and gray and paying interest is actually a tax deduction and helps us as well. But he starts to get this glazed look in his eyes and I know that next he's going to say, "Let's talk about this later." So, we wait and have the same convo another day. And we will have the same convo another day.