Wedding Ceremonies

[jundp 191]

So this may not go in Off Topic, but I can't decide where it should go.

Here's my question: Has anyone here written their own wedding ceremony? A friend of mine is going to be the officiant at our wedding in Seattle and since our church wedding will take place in Germany, we are writing the ceremony ourselves. (And when I say "we" I really mean "me"). I've looked at various ceremonies and am starting to form ours but it's nowhere near ready.

We are including a section for a family blessing because I have 2 children, but other than vows and the rings/question I'm curious about other parts of the ceremony that people may suggest. Obviously our final product will be our own, but I'd love to hear some ideas. And I'm just nosy, tbh.

Edited October 23, 2007 by jundp

[raymaga 25]

We were married by a judge in Seattle, and we gave her a copy of what we wanted her to say at our wedding. She gladly complied and we had exactly what we wanted.

[Marilyn. 340]

same here.... we just gave the lady a copy of what we wanted her to say and she was totally fine with it....

[jundp 191]

Awesome, thanks. I know my friend will read what we want, but I'm also curious as to what else people had in their ceremonies besides the questions/ring exchange, vows and family blessing (for me).

Any ideas?

[Marilyn. 340]

we had these thing called the hands ceremony.. it was really nice but my family freaked because part of it mentioned our unborn children which of course referred to our future children but my family thought for a second that I was pregnant

i am trying to find the one we used but this is a version of it....

The Hand Ceremony

(a more extensive selection is available to those who book KCW for their officiant services)

-Bride-, please face -Groom- and hold his hands, palms up, so that you may see the gift that they are to you. These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, for a lifetime of happiness. These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes; tears of sorrow and tears of joy. These are the hands that will comfort you in illness and hold you when fear or grief fills you. These are the hands that will give you support and celebrate with you in your accomplishments.

-Groom-, please hold -Bride- hands, palms up, so that you may see the gift that they are to you.

These are the hands that will hold you tight as you struggle through difficult times. They are the hands that will comfort you when you are sick or console you when you are grieving. These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the year, for a lifetime of happiness. These are the hands that will give you support as she encourages you to fulfill your dreams. Together, as a team, everything you wish for can be realized.

http://www.kettlecreekweddings.com/hand_ceremony.htm

[Marilyn. 340]

I think it was something like this....

______'s (bride's Name), please face _______'s (Groom's Name), and hold his hands, palms up, so you may see the gift that they are to you.

These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and vibrant with love, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as he promises to love you all the days of his life.

These are the hands that will work along side yours, as together you build your future, as you laugh and cry, as you share your innermost secrets and dreams.

These are the hands that look so large and strong, yet will be so gentle as he holds your child for the first time.

These are the hands that will work long hours for you and your new family.

These are that hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, for a lifetime of happiness.

These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes: tears of sorrow and tears of joy.

These are the hands that will comfort you in illness, and hold you when fear or grief overwhelm you.

These are the hands that will tenderly lift your chin and brush your cheek as they raise your face to look into his eyes: eyes that are filled completely with his overwhelming love and desire for you.

______'s (Groom's Name), please hold ______'s (bride's Name)hands, palms up, where you may see the gift that they are to you.

These are the hands of your best friend, smooth, young and carefree, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as she promises to love you all the days of her life.

These are the hands that will hold each child in tender love, soothing them through illness and hurt, supporting and encouraging them along the way, and knowing when it is time to let go.

These are the hands that will hold you tight as you struggle through difficult times

These are the hands that will comfort you when you are sick, or console you when you are grieving.

They are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, for a lifetime of happiness.

These are the hands that will give you support as she encourages you to chase down your dreams. Together as a team, everything you wish for can be realized.

[sunandmoon 450]

my wife organized our wedding ceromony. she included some things that are part of Philippine wedding traditions. cord ceromony, lighting of unity candle and coin exchange. perhaps you could include some things that are part of German wedding traditions

[Cassie 8]

Our minister talked a smidge,

then we exchanged vows (we wrote them ourselves),

we exchanged rings (wrote that part ourselves -- well, I think I cribbed it from the internet somewhere),

a friend read a reading that was a mix of a couple of different pieces that I had found,

we had a version of a unity candle (we used three colours of candle wax granules, representing Jerry, me, and God, and poured them in the jar alternately)

he pronounced us man and wife and we were good to go!

It was pretty much exactly what we wanted.

[Jasman0717 9]

I know a lot of people who have written their own vows including my two daughters and my ex

[jundp 191]

THANK YOU!!!

Marilyn, I laugh about the unborn children thing I guess we'd be okay since I have kids, but that's funny.

Maybe some Germans out there can suggest something to add. We do have a German Wedding cup to use at the reception, but P hasn't really said anything about specific traditions that he wants. He's saying his vows to me in English and I'm saying mine to him in German. That's about it.

It's so much more fun to make wedding plans than stress over the Visa, imo. Luckily our date isn't until August and I have a slew of friends planning with/for me. This may possibly be the wedding put on by the entire community!

[Marilyn. 340]

here are a couple of German wedding traditions that I found on the net....

Kidnapping of the bride - in some areas (mostly in small villages) friends kidnap the bride and the groom has to find her. Normally, he has to search in a lot of pubs and invite all people in there (or pay the whole bill). Sometimes this ritual ends badly.

Polterabend - this is an informal (informal dress and food) party at the evening before the wedding where plates and dishes are smashed (the broken pieces are thought to bring good luck to the bride). The bride and groom have to clean up everything.

White Ribbon - the bride carries lengths of white ribbon with her bouquet, and after the church ceremony is over and the guests are leaving the church, she hands each driver a ribbon that they tie to the radio antenna.

Wedding Cake - the wedding cake, mostly a large cake with lots of ornaments, has to be cut by the bride and the groom together.

http://www.germanculture.com.ua/library/weekly/aa030601a.htm

Baumstamm Sägen (Log sawing)

Another old Bavarian tradition occurs right after the church ceremony. When the couple exits the Church there is a log on a sawhorse and the couple has to cut the log in half! This is to symbolize the first tough tasks of their future they can accomplish together.

Fichtenzweige (Fir boughs)

As the couple walks to the wedding car, fir boughs are laid along the path to pave their first newlywed steps with fresh greenery to symbolize hope, luck and fertility.

Reis Werfen (Rich throwing)

In this tradition it is said that the amount of rice that stays in the bride's hair is the number of children the couple will have.

Hochzeitssuppe (Wedding soup)

The Hochzeitssuppe is made from beef, dumplings and vegetables and the guests eat if from a large bowl.

http://www.german-toasting-glasses.com/inf...traditions.html

Religious Marriage Ceremonies in Germany

On the third day, the German religious wedding ceremony takes place. German brides do not have traditional wedding attendants except for flower girls.

Sometime during the vows, when the couple are on their knees, the groom might kneel on his brides wedding dress to show who will be 'wearing the pants' in the relationship. When they stand, the bride might step on her groom's foot to show otherwise.

As the newlyweds leave the wedding chappel, they throw coins to the children watching.

A wedding reception follows the religious service.. It is customary for the 'best man' to steal the bride from the reception and take her to a local pub, where they drink champagne until the groom finds them. Then the groom has to pay for all that they drank. Later, friends of the couple block all the reception site exits with ribbons and garlands. When the couple is ready to leave for their honeymoon, the groom must pay a toll to exit, usually the promise of another party.

http://www.worldweddingtraditions.com/loca...traditions.html

I thought the bolded part was cute

[eau_xplain 2]

Awesome, thanks. I know my friend will read what we want, but I'm also curious as to what else people had in their ceremonies besides the questions/ring exchange, vows and family blessing (for me).

Any ideas?

Going into our marriage, my husband and I had one son each. So, we included in our church ceremony the "Vow To Children". I said the vow to my husband's son and my husband said his vow to my son. I'll try to find a copy of it but we think it was perfect from the look on our children's faces when we said the vows to them. They didn't know it was going to happen.

[jundp 191]

@ Marilyn, P would love that part about kneeling on the dress! For the wedding cup, the one who finishes her/his cup first gets to "rule the house" and the woman's cup is about a fourth the size. Hee hee. I know that some of the German traditions, like polterabrand, we'll do there for the ceremony. Some of the other stuff he's never even heard of, so it could be regional maybe. I guess we'll stick with the Wedding Cup for here.

@ eau_xplain, I like that a lot. I think we'll tell my kids they'll be a part of the ceremony so they aren't shy, but not exactly what we'll be saying. They're both more anxious than I for this visa stuff to be over.

[kisschick1976 0]

We had a pirate wedding so these were our vows (stolen from the internet, but we changed them up for our own use) We were married at the courthouse a few days earlier so at the pirate wedding we didn't have an officiant, we just read the vows, exchanged rings and he pronounced us pirate and wench

Pirate Wedding Vows

Groom: I, Mad Dog _______________ take ye, Saucy ______________________ as me Heart, me Soul, me Good Wench with a stout right hook, the bright dawn of each new day and the soft bed of each day's night. I promise to love ye and honor ye; to make ye laugh when yer feelin' out of sorts and pretend to listen to ye when ye babble on and on about nothin' in particular. I will protect you from the elements and the elephants should we ever encounter them as it is my understanding that they can be very large and unpredictable. I will love thee through scurvy and through fire, in wealth or poverty whether ye be near or far. And when I speak of treasure, as I am wont to do, everyone within the sound of me voice will know that what I am really speaking about is you. All of this will I undertake until there are no horizons left to chase and the rum is gone.

Bride: I, Saucy _________________ take ye, Mad Dog __________________ as me Heart, me Soul, me Salty Jack with a crooked smile, the foggy haze of each new day and the lumpy (but familiar) mattress of each day's night. I promise to love ye and honor ye; to make ye laugh so hard the rum comes out yer nose and pretend to listen to ye when ye babble on about nothin' in particular. I will protect you from my wrath and from giraffes which I understand are very tall and will sometimes step on people because they are not looking where they are stepping. I will love thee through scurvy and through fire, in wealth or poverty whether ye be near or far. And when I speak of treasure, as I am wont to do, everyone within the sound of me voice will know that I am day dreaming again. All of this will I undertake until there are no horizons left to chase and the rum is gone.

[pedroh 21]

my mother in law (da preacher) read the standard marriage vows.. the trick was.. that she also said them in spanish! for my folks... one paragraph in english, uno en español.. that was so sweet