My name ain't Stella....

[Yaads 0]

Good Afternoon!!!

Wooiiee! What a day I have had so far Power and Internet down at work...trees falling all over the place...roads flooded and blocked with debris...what a wicked storm. I am here finally and just caught up with the story. I won't rehash it all for again but Jawi...this story is so good Ian is such a fool...

Well my weekend was off the hook My poor hubby didn't know what hit him. Over and over he kept asking where I learned this or that from Mi nah tell him mi secret Thanks for all the vocab...hehehe

[Jonesie 1]

One of the men offers to stand with him on the roadside to flag down a taxi. When the taxi finally stops, he tells Ian that he would appreciate a small token of his gratitude. Ian reaches into his pocket and tips his new friend handsomely. They say their goodbyes, and Ian is back on the road to Ocho Rios.

Ian’s eyes bug out of his head when he notices the cab driver stop for more people on the road.*[/i]

Damn he got played! He paid extra and still has to share the ride

[Jonesie 1]

Good Afternoon!!!

Wooiiee! What a day I have had so far Power and Internet down at work...trees falling all over the place...roads flooded and blocked with debris...what a wicked storm. I am here finally and just caught up with the story. I won't rehash it all for again but Jawi...this story is so good Ian is such a fool...

Well my weekend was off the hook My poor hubby didn't know what hit him. Over and over he kept asking where I learned this or that from Mi nah tell him mi secret Thanks for all the vocab...hehehe

Eeeehhheeennnnn

[jawi876 2]

Good Afternoon!!!

Wooiiee! What a day I have had so far Power and Internet down at work...trees falling all over the place...roads flooded and blocked with debris...what a wicked storm. I am here finally and just caught up with the story. I won't rehash it all for again but Jawi...this story is so good Ian is such a fool...

Well my weekend was off the hook My poor hubby didn't know what hit him. Over and over he kept asking where I learned this or that from Mi nah tell him mi secret Thanks for all the vocab...hehehe

Eeehhhnnn?? Yuh quint hup yuh pums pon im? Ie sell hoff? woooieeeeee! Eh..Eh! Walk hout mi gyal...walk hout!

[Jonesie 1]

Good Afternoon!!!

Wooiiee! What a day I have had so far Power and Internet down at work...trees falling all over the place...roads flooded and blocked with debris...what a wicked storm. I am here finally and just caught up with the story. I won't rehash it all for again but Jawi...this story is so good Ian is such a fool...

Well my weekend was off the hook My poor hubby didn't know what hit him. Over and over he kept asking where I learned this or that from Mi nah tell him mi secret Thanks for all the vocab...hehehe

Eeehhhnnn?? Yuh quint hup yuh pums pon im? Ie sell hoff? woooieeeeee! Eh..Eh! Walk hout mi gyal...walk hout!

If yuh knoa seh yuh naah borrow noboddy cloze den step inna di video light!

[jawi876 2]

Ian: Excuse me? I’m really in a hurry. What are you doing?

Driva: Mi collect mi fare dem. Nuh worries man. Mi soon get yuh where yuh ago. Yeah man. Calm dung…everyting criss. Irie!

Ian: Wait. Hold on. Don’t pick up anymore passengers. I will pay for your service. How much would you normally collect?

Driver: *Glances over at his passenger, mentally gauging his pockets and level of desperation.* Well…mi normally get $600 JA per passenger. Mi car can old about 10-15 people dem.

Ian: 10-15…are you serious?? In a hatchback? How in the world…look never mind…just drive past those people. I will pay you all of your fares. Let’s see ummm…that would be $9,000 JA right?

Driver: Yeah man! *The driver can’t believe his luck. He looks at Ian’s dusty appearance and guesses that the man is running for his life. He stops briefly to find out where the other people are headed, then he lies and tells them that he is not going that way.* So, sir. Can I stop and get you something cold and refreshing to drink? Maybe, some hot and spicy jerk chicken? Do you smoke the herb rude bwoy?

Ian: I wouldn’t mind a cold beer and another blunt. This day has been pure hell from start to finish. I’m going to kill the trick that has me chasing her a** down here!

Driver: Women and money his the root of all hevil. Jah knows! *chuckles*

The driver pulls off to a small open bar facing the ocean. Ian asks him to order him a Heineken, and he walks to the restroom to try and clean himself up a little. When he gets in the restroom, he notices that there are no paper towels, and very little toilet paper. So, Ian takes his jacket and tie off. He uses the inside of his jacket to beat the dust off his pants. Then, he puts water on his head to clear the dust from his hair and face.

Ian walks back to the bar, and takes a seat on a carved bar stool. The driver hands him a Heineken, and a HUGE spliff that is already lit. Ian takes a long pull on the weed, and lets the smoke fill every space inside his lungs. He tips his head back, and the smoke billows out of his mouth slowly like the smoking radiator. Ian picks up his beer and drinks it down in one big gulp. He is not sure why he was rushing to no where anyway, and decides that he will enjoy the small break by the ocean.*

[Jonesie 1]

Eediat bway a pay 9000 fi wan single ride? Cha!

[Yaads 0]

Eediat bway a pay 9000 fi wan single ride? Cha!

Obviously him nuh noh how fi convert the funds yet Poor thing

10-15 people inna hatchback?!? Ian is one eediat bwoy for real

[Mephys 2]

Eediat Me likey that word

Is that a bad thing if I start learning some words ? I'm a bad girl

[jawi876 2]

Ian: I need a phone that works. I have to make a couple of phone calls.

Driver: Mi can tek yuh tuh Digicel inna Ochi. But, you can borrow mine.

Ian: Thanks man. What’s your name by the way?

Driver: Dem call me Frowzy. What’s yours big man?

Ian: Yo. Frowzy. I’m Ian, man. I appreciate your help today.

Frowzy: So Ian. What happened to you man? You look like you rolled off a cliff. Ha-ha.

Ian: You mean what didn’t happen to me. I flew down here because this broad is trying to spend all my money on a wedding for her friend. I can’t stand her trick a** friend, and I told her that I didn’t want her come here. She whined and complained until I gave in…little trick!

So, I book my first class ticket to find out what both of them are up to, you feel me? When I get here, I realize that I dropped my money clip with a few Ks in it. I try to backtrack for it and I run smack dab into this fine shorty honey dip. Yo man, shorty was a dime and a couple of nickels too! Y’all have some fine little phillies down here in Jamaica. Yeah MON! IRIE! *Takes another pull on the spliff*

Anyway, I’m driving along when I hit this phocking moon crater in the road. Tore up the phocking car from the frame, for real. I flag down this damn big rig hauling some funky looking grayish white dirt. They give me a ride to a gas station on the back of the phocking rig. I have to sit on the back because they are about 5 deep in the cab of the truck. That damn dirt clings to everything. I ruined my suit; I’m talking 5k down the phocking toilet. Look at my shoes man! Sh**! Anyway, one of the guys flags you down, and here we are.

Frowzy: Damn man! Ooman wuk obeah pon yuh tuh rass!

Ian: Yo, I don’t know what you just said…but that’s some funny sh** for real! HA-HA! *cough* HA-HA! Let me call that dime piece I met at the airport, and tell her the plans changed just a little. *Ian pats his pockets, his chest and looks around in confusion*

Ah damn! I’on even know her name! I gave her my number thinking the damn cell phone would work down here. Sh**! Damn man. I asked honey dip out for drinks and sh**. Now I’m without a ride. *Takes another turn at the spliff; almost falling off his stool. Ian hands the spliff to Frowzy.*

Frowzy: *Frowzy takes the spliff and inhales*Try your phone again man. Turn it off, and back on. It should pick up a signal den. If yuh still wan fe tek yuh gyal hout, link mi lata zeen. Mek mi come check oonu.

Ian: Takes his phone off the holster, and does what Frowzy instructed him.* Yo man! It worked! Thanks. Here let me get another round of beers for us! Bartender!

Eediat Me likey that word

Is that a bad thing if I start learning some words ? I'm a bad girl

LMAO...we have a Jamaicaholic in the making. :lol:

[Yaads 0]

Eediat Me likey that word

Is that a bad thing if I start learning some words ? I'm a bad girl

That is not bad at all There are some really *nice* words you can pick up

Eediat Me likey that word

Is that a bad thing if I start learning some words ? I'm a bad girl

LMAO...we have a Jamaicaholic in the making. :lol:

You go girl!

[Jonesie 1]

Eediat Me likey that word

Is that a bad thing if I start learning some words ? I'm a bad girl

Not at all

[Jonesie 1]

Ian: Thanks man. What’s your name by the way?

Driver: Dem call me Frowzy. What’s yours big man?

Ian: Anyway, I’m driving along when I hit this phocking moon crater in the road. Tore up the phocking car from the frame, for real. I flag down this damn big rig hauling some funky looking grayish white dirt. They give me a ride to a gas station on the back of the phocking rig. I have to sit on the back because they are about 5 deep in the cab of the truck. That damn dirt clings to everything. I ruined my suit; I’m talking 5k down the phocking toilet. Look at my shoes man! Sh**! Anyway, one of the guys flags you down, and here we are.

Frowzy: Damn man! Ooman wuk obeah pon yuh tuh rass!

I AM ROLLIN! FROWZY! A GREEN HIM SMELL GREEN

MOON CRATER

GREYISH WHITE DIRT

LAWD!

I was gonna go home early cause I am hurtin so bad but this story helped me pull thru today...I haven't laughed so hard in a good while

[Yaads 0]

Not to mash up Jawi's story but I need some more JA help.

Ok so I have an old man for a hubby sometimes...all we ever listen to is Beres Hammond, Al Green, Dennis Brown, Bob...old stuff. I am so sick of old stuff...it is good but I want to be up with the time ya know?? So any good suggestions to get more JA music in my life but the hubby isn't gonna handle no Bounty or Sizzla I am a big Richie Spice fan...anythings similar?

Lawd you all would have died this weekend...we pulled out the Culture Club mix Good music but

[Mephys 2]

Eediat Me likey that word

Is that a bad thing if I start learning some words ? I'm a bad girl

That is not bad at all There are some really *nice* words you can pick up

Eediat Me likey that word

Is that a bad thing if I start learning some words ? I'm a bad girl

LMAO...we have a Jamaicaholic in the making. :lol:

You go girl!