My name ain't Stella....

[jawi876 2]

Mya: Girl! Why are you buying those outfits that Mother Teresa wouldn’t even wear? We are going to JAMAICA girl!!! It’s time for you to let loose and let it all hang out Miss Thang!

Toya: Mya girl stop playing. My mama raised me to understand that less is definitely not more. Have you seen the size of my thighs? I need major coverage for these things. Hell, I would probably swim in jeans if I wasn’t afraid of drowning. I believe in leaving a LOT to the imagination.

Mya: T, I hope to God you don’t go to Jamaica trippin’. If you don’t think you the sh**, no one else will. I’m blessed, and I know that I’m a 10! Shorty you a ten…a ten…shorty you a ten!!! *giggling*

Baby girl, I am going to break you out of that self-imposed shell if it kills me. You know men like a big a** and thick thighs. I heard the men in Jamaica like them big girl…way bigger than you. You saw that movie Ms. Monique made, ‘Phat Girlz’ something or the other. All those foreign men like ‘em pretty in the face and thick in the waist!

Toya: You are really trippin My. I am nowhere near thick enough to be compared to the girls in ‘Phat Girlz’. I mean Monique is doing the damn thing…but she is a BIGGG girl. My, I don’t know why I let you talk me into this trip…Ian is trippin already…talking about I’m trying to get back out there and sh*…ummm stuff. See, three hours around you and forgot that I was trying to stop swearing. Damn…I mean dang. Sh*!! See! *Stomping foot in mock anger*

Mya: Ian is a damn trip! You know how I feel about his sorry a** anyway. He is just afraid that some other man will be on you if you get back out there. Then, you will finally open your eyes and realize that the Earth, moon and stars don’t revolve around his Black broke triflin’ a**.

Toya: Watch your mouth! Dang girl, kids are in here!

The women laugh and continue shopping

To be continued….

Edited October 22, 2007 by jawi876

[Jonesie 1]

Mek mi get di papcawn an ting...hurry up noh man!

[Marlita 0]

[Jasman0717 9]

[Ta Ta 1]

small small .....wer di res ?

[Jonesie 1]

small small .....wer di res ?

You see how she tease us?

[jawi876 2]

Airline stewardess: We are now boarding Zone 5…for Air Jamaica flight 059 arriving in Montego Bay, Jamaica…Air Jamaica flight 059 boarding all passengers in Zone 5 going to Montego Bay Jamaica. Thank you.

Toya: I can’t believe Ian threw my bags out on the curb because he didn’t approve of my outfit. I don’t know why he acts like that! I mean I’m not showing all my goodies and stuff. I should call him and try to calm him down, huh? My, don’t you think these shorts are a little…ummmm…tiny? *pulling self-consciously on the bottom of the shorts*

Mya: Girl please! Forget that fool! If anything, you should be calling to go off and tell his a** to be out by the time you get back. No man would ever disrespect me like that, and live to tell about it. Stop pulling on the shorts before you pull the cuff out of them. They are supposed to be short…dang…they are called “shorts”.

Toya: I don’t know. *still fidgeting with cuffs on her shorts*

I don’t let Ian disrespect me Mya. He has just been a little testy because he didn’t want me to leave him. He told me that he is going to miss me, that’s all. Maybe I should have worn the velour jogging suit, at least until I was out of his sight. Mya, I know that you are all independent and “don’t need a man for sh**”, but not all of us are happy being alone. I wish you would stop being so hard on him.

Mya: Whatever, T. You let that man treat you like #######, and you think I’m supposed to support him in that? He**s naw! I call them like I see them. You are too pretty and bright to let any man bring down your self worth. Stop worrying about him and his attitude. Now let’s go and enjoy this trip.

*The girls hand over their passports and boarding passes, then enter the plane*

[jawi876 2]

*Shortly after, the plane lands and the passengers begin to disembark*

Mya: Wow! Look how small this airport is! Where are the escalators and moving sidewalks? Why are we walking a country mile? What the he**? I didn’t sign on for no hiking expeditions and sh**! If I had known all of this, I would have hired a porter to carry this heavy a** carry-on. Damn!

Toya: *Peeping over her stunners at Mya* My, you know I love you, but do you have to be so crass all the time? Need I remind you that you are a lady, and a should carry yourself as such.

*whispering loudly* You are embarrassing me, all these people don’t need to know we have never been to a third world country before! Come on now. Don’t make me regret coming with you. *chuckling*

Mya: B**** please! I don’t care what these people think of me! I’ma stay real until the day I die. Yehn know?! *laughing loudly* We need to make a stop in the ladies’ restroom before we see any cuties. I have to make sure I’m still the number 1 stunna! Jamaica, are you ready for me???

The women breeze through Immigrations, Baggage claim and Customs with ease

Mya: Did you see that cute guy in Customs smiling at you? He was all up in yours girl.

Toya: No he wasn’t he was just being pleasant. It is his job after all. Where are we supposed to get our ride to Ocho Rios? Oh. There is the counter we were instructed to look for…let’s go! Mya? My…

[*JG* 2]

I believed it all the way till the nice guy in customs part.

[jawi876 2]

*Mya is about 30 feet away smiling and flirting with a guy that is obviously very intrigued as well. Toya backtracks to Mya to get her attention. Mya coyly hands the man her business card before waving and smiling demurely back at him*

Toya: Mya! I don’t want us to get separated down here. Neither of us has been to Jamaica, and we do not know our way around. Please try and stick together until we can get our bearings okay?

Mya: *rolling eyes* I didn’t come down here to be lectured by my mother, which is why I didn’t go with her. I’m beginning to wonder why I came with you too. Chill out, we are on vacation. What are you in a hurry for? The limo has to wait on us. Do you have the information on how we meet up with the driver? I think we are supposed to look for our names or something.

Toya: We have to go to the information counter over there...come on.

Mya: Wait a minute, I see the restroom. You can go on and tell them that we are here. I have to freshen up, okay. I’ll be right back.

*Mya sashays off towards the restroom without waiting for an answer because she has spotted her admirer from earlier. The two of them duck quickly into the restroom hoping that no one saw them. Mya was surprised and smiles slowly when her admirer quickly locked the door behind him*

Edited October 22, 2007 by jawi876

[jawi876 2]

I believed it all the way till the nice guy in customs part.

LMAO...never said he was nice...just said that he was cute and smiling at a pretty woman. LOL

[Marlita 0]

Lawd! Mya yuh nasty!!! yuh ain't even been on di island 5 minutes!! **kissteet**

[jawi876 2]

Lawd! Mya yuh nasty!!! yuh ain't even been on di island 5 minutes!! **kissteet**

[jawi876 2]

*Mya’s admirer has the finely tuned body of an Olympic swimmer…not too bulky and not too slender. His airport uniform hugs and caresses his bulging biceps and rock hard thighs. His skin is the color of the famed Jamaican Appleton rum and just as smooth. His dreads are immaculate and freshly twisted at the roots. His dreads are in a tight ponytail that reaches just past his waistline. He has full plump lips and eyelashes that would make any woman jealous. His Jamaican-Irish bloodline has given him a very exotic look.*

Mya: So, what’s up with the locked door? Dude you are so not ready for all of Mya! What’s your name again?

Delmar: Mi juss wan yuh tuh mi self fe a likkle while. My gyal yuh sweet tuh rass! Mi name is Travis…but dem call mi Tran.

Mya: Huh? What did you say? Can you slow down a little? I didn’t understand what you just said.

Delmar: I’m sorry beautiful Mya. I said that you stole my heart with the first glimmer of your pretty smile. You can call me Tran. Is this your first trip to Jamaica?

Mya: Oh. Thanks. *blushing and smiling wider* I…I have to get back to my friend now we are headed to Ocho Rios and we have a limo driver waiting on us this is our first trip to Jamaica and we are so excited when I saw you I thought you were so handsome and ff- fine I hope you use the numbers on the card I…I…I would love to get to know you better but I’m not looking for a long distance relationship or anything how often do you get to the USA? My name is Mya by the way, and this is my first trip to Jamaica. Mya be cool girl. He will not be the last attractive man you meet in Jamaica. Don’t let him see how much he is turning you on. Why is this man affecting me like this so quickly?

*Delmar knows all to well that Mya is feeling him and will be easy prey. He saunters slowly over to her, glances over his shoulder to double check the lock on the door and stands as close as he can to her without physically touching. He tentatively allows the back of his palm to softly touch the side of her face and lowers his voice seductively*

[Marlita 0]

Mi wan more!!!