The Vent

[L_n_O 3]

What i do some times when my wife has a problem, i ask "Do you want me to fix it? or listen? And most of the times it is listen!

I really like that

[MissStacey 1]

that's what's making me crazy!

not knowing what is causing this!

Sorry to hear this.

I keep getting bitten by something in Louisiana. The bites get so itchy and then develop a red streak- a bad sign. I go to the doctor and they usually give me a shot and then I have pills to take for 10 days. Last time they just did a steroid shot and no pills.

I have spent the last nine days in Edmonton- the best part of the trip- not a single bug bite!!

[SpiritAlight 1]

My good friend in Montreal just took a 6 week leave.

She is covered with hives.

Stress...anxiety.

Her job is high stress and she is an HSP (a highly sensitive person!).

As such, the skin can only be so thick...and that is all a facade anyways.

My other (best) friend in Vancouver is also sinking. She is an over-achieving individual.

Highly functioning...and so...

It seems like many women are being affected at the moment.

Many people I know at being hit harder than usual by depression or other such debilitating afflictions.

My deduction - if it isn't the alignments of the planets - is the mess the world is in.

How could a sensitive soul ignore all the violent/aggressive (passive or otherwise) and disrespectful/dishonouring energies?

Yup.

More love.

Less hate.

Edited May 30, 2008 by SpiritAlight

[L_n_O 3]

Arlington Free Clinic provides medical services to uninsured, low-income residents of Arlington County, Virginia who have resided in the United States for at least one year.

To be eligible individuals must provide:

* Proof of residency in US of at least one year:

* Proof of residency in Arlington County, Virginia

* Proof of income

* Verification of no medical insurance

How do you prove this out of curiosity?? I can't go to a free clinic anyway though cuz I haven't lived here for a year yet

[SpiritAlight 1]

Arlington Free Clinic provides medical services to uninsured, low-income residents of Arlington County, Virginia who have resided in the United States for at least one year.

To be eligible individuals must provide:

* Proof of residency in US of at least one year:

* Proof of residency in Arlington County, Virginia

* Proof of income

* Verification of no medical insurance

How do you prove this out of curiosity?? I can't go to a free clinic anyway though cuz I haven't lived here for a year yet

I used a free clinic when I was sailing in Maine almost 2 years go now.

I only showed them ID I had from Vancouver and explained that my fever needed to be looked at (I almost never go to see anyone as I do not like Western medicine practices)...they saw me, gave me a prescription for expensive anti-biotics, and then mailed me a bill (to the dock where I was staying, ha). I called the hospital, explained that I was a visitor with no insurance, and that I had been told it would be free. They sent me a form to fill out and to write a letter about why I could not pay. that was easy. Done and no problems.

(As a person with no fixed address, I was honest enough to tell them where they could find me.)

Good luck with all of this Liz. Call and talk to a human being.

You never know.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

In the meantime, try using icepacks on your hand to reduce the swelling and the itching. It does sound like an allergic reaction to something. I know that I get huge welts here - the size of a quarter - from a mosquito bite and I never did that in Canada. There is a small no-seeum type of insect around that also bites and really stings - and then there are fire ants that are really painful and blister. Spider bites also often blister so it is probably not that. Chiggers are smaller but intensely itchy and nothing works on them as well.

The thing I found that helped the most was the ice. An old wive's tale that you can also try is using meat tenderizer on a new bite - it is supposed to counteract what ever the insect has injected. Don't know if it works or not, but it is worth a try. A swollen hand though is incredibly painful. Try cold water and ice packs and see if that helps.

Good luck and hope you are able to get to a clinic or a doctor. You may wish to ask a pharmacist at a pharmacy if they have anything OTC they can recommend as well.

Edited May 30, 2008 by Kathryn41

[Delicia 1]

I have had my last squabble with my husband regarding immigration. I think 3 years in any immigration system is more than cruel and unusual punishment. While I have always questioned his motivation and he has always responded that he is naturally a procrastinator, we have fought about immigration since the beginning of our marriage.

The last few weeks have been us making plans to move the kid, dog and him here this summer. I have been pushing him to get all his paperwork in order (get a new criminal records thing done since the first one might very well expire before he ever makes it to the interview, get his shots updated, etc) and he has been dragging his feet. He claims that there is no point in doing it early because it might expire. The original plan was for me to fly to Toronto, rent a car, pick everyone and their stuff up, drive to Detroit, switch cars (yes, you can do this btw) and finish the drive to Phoenix where hubby would stay as a visitor as long as allowed or until he had to return to Canada for medicals, interviews, or his citizenship processing. I did the math, that roadtrip would run ~$3100. Its definitely cheaper to fly but the dog was the problem. I was leaning towards finding the dog a new home in Toronto, but he wasn't having it, so I dropped that from the list of viable options. The dog can fly via Air Canada except between June - September for $150 with his paid ticket. Regardless, since all 3 of us would be living on my income alone, its not like there will be tons of extra cash to afford multiple trips back and forth for him to Canada to get stuff done. So, we were down to him waiting until he could bring the dog via air or making the trip via road. But, and a big but, I wasn't going to arrange any of this until his paperwork was all in (do I need to mention that I have been waiting for him to get a translation of his birth certificate since February?) My paperwork is done. I have an employment letter, my tax transcripts, and can print off pay stubs the day I need them. My I-864EZ is completed, it just needs a signature.

His perspective: it will get one when it needs to get done. He, and I quote, "Doesn't do what I don't want to do and I hate when you tell me what to do!"

So, after he slams me with some horrible emails, name calling, etc, I booked a flight for my son for right after school gets out and sent my husband (soon to be my next ex) the confirmation. All he has to do is get the kid to the airport in time. My husband can do whatever. I am tired of living in limbo and if he wants to come down here, he can make his own way, with or without the dog or he can stay whereever he likes for as long as he likes. Bottom line: I don't even care anymore. But hell if I am going to spend 3-4 days stuck in a car for this jerk off not to mention, I feel no obligation to bend over backwards for him anymore.

Perhaps I am just not the marrying kind. Perhaps I am just tired of living this way. Perhaps Immigration got the best of me (can't use the word 'us' here because he has been rather disinterested from both processes we went through). I feel like if I don't do everything, nothing gets done and he is a dependent of mine rather than a partner. Perhaps me and him are just too different and we were both too stupid to figure it out earlier. Peraps I equate his 'procrastination' with a lack of caring or concern.

I am just done. I am not going to withdraw my petition, but I am not going to do anything about it either. No phone calls, no tracking, no checking the USCIS site, nothing. He wants to come, he can do everything or anything or nothing. I just don't care what he does or doesn't do. I am going to Western Union him some funds that he had transferred down here earlier and call it even or at least try to cut my losses. End of story.

Thanks for letting vent and unless there is some dramatic turn of events, I don't see any need to come here anymore.

[Flames9_RN 358]

Arlington Free Clinic provides medical services to uninsured, low-income residents of Arlington County, Virginia who have resided in the United States for at least one year.

To be eligible individuals must provide:

* Proof of residency in US of at least one year:

* Proof of residency in Arlington County, Virginia

* Proof of income

* Verification of no medical insurance

How do you prove this out of curiosity?? I can't go to a free clinic anyway though cuz I haven't lived here for a year yet

No clue about the Arlington 1, but the culmore clinic doesn't check, they just go by ur word

[Cassie 8]

Delicia, there are no words other than I am truly sorry.

[Leafgal 3]

Delicia I am very sorry to hear how things are going. I know we were all pulling for you. I hope that things turn out the way you want them to. I know that this process is very difficult, but know that we are here for you if you want to vent please feel free, and maybe someone else can give some words of wisdom.

[SpiritAlight 1]

Oh Delicia,

Wow! Well what more can be said.

You both have been bled and there is seemingly nothing left.

I am so sorry to hear how you are doing and about the constant battle.

At least if the two of you were on the same side...fighting together...alas.

Hmmm...all I can relate to is my tiny one year of "waiting" and worrying and fighting and debating and all that...and it created a rift we have yet to heal.

For me, I want to feel that I am understood and I want to have contact with what is being said from the other.

When words are flying around and I don't feel them, I do not even remember what was said, let alone feeling like I am in a relationship.

Bleh!

I often wonder if we can recover from the disagreements, and really it is up to me to let it go...the past I mean.

Perhaps if the now was without troubles...

As for cutting your losses, well, some people recover completely. Others partially, and others not at all.

I guess that choice is up to us.

Cutting one's losses is sometime the way, and other times the person finds themselves still unhappy; not where they want to be.

Life can be a circle of events that repeat themselves...it is for us to learn that particular lesson.

Your husband and you are exhausted and have no one to take things out on except each other.

That is all.

If you each can find forgiveness (for-giving...for-give, see how cool the word is broken up? it's true meaning)...

For giving.

For getting.

Please do think I am lecturing you or anyone.

I care and so I respond in the best way possible at that moment.

Yes, I everything I say to you I say to myself.

[CBR 0]

Delicia, I can only respond to what I've read as I don't know you or your husband. I can relate to your frustration & anger though. My fiance and I went through a period of time like that too. He didn't want to get anything done ahead of time for fear of it expiring and wanted the dates to coincide with when we were approved etc... He seemed to be procrastinating and I got irritated because I had all my ducks in a row, why couldn't he? He expressed his frustration with my impatience as well. I backed off and lo-and-behold he got everything done. On time too. You'll be going through Montreal just like us. He will have time to get that stuff done when your approval happens (not sure about the birth cert. translation though, have no clue about that). I can sense impatience and tension in alot of your posts. You're adding up all the time since you've been married into one bundle of immigration headache when in reality you've had to restart the process for lack of movement from Canada. I know it's frustrating, but I think you're letting the lump of time fuel your fire. I don't say this to be mean, I say it in the hopes that you can see it for what it is and it helps you relax. There are many of us who's cases take ridiculously longer than everyone else's (we were DEAD last in the July filer's group!!), but everyone gets through eventually.

You and your husband are just very different in that aspect. I hope that you can patch things up and remember why you married him. After all this ####### is overwith the difference in your personalities may very well compliment each other. You can learn & take the best each has to offer.

[SpiritAlight 1]

Oh fergawdsakes...I meant to say that I hope you don't think I was lecturing, not that I was lecturing.

Sorry.

My bad.

[Cassie 8]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ahh, now I feel better

[trailmix 77]

Delicia,

I read your post and thought about it for a while and I don't have any words of wisdom.

It is a tough tough time for you both and I hope that this 'stand-off' passes.