The Vent

[Necrotica 0]

My short-term disability claim was denied.

I'm calling the EEOC tomorrow and filing a complaint.

Sweet friend --- I know only too well how effed up it is to deal with morons who don't understand disabilities. I almost choked when I read they did not accommodate you, since IT'S THE EFFING LAW . Go ahead with the LTD claim and don't desist.

Also, check out companies who actively hire folks with special talents like yourself --- you'll be surprised to find there are good peepz out there. I am sending you all the best vibes I can muster today. Love to Rejean as well.

Financial insecurities and difficulties are a strain in any relationship, and I try to remember to put first things first: bye bye prime rib, hello tofu; ciao 300 channels I never watch, aloha basic cable. It can happen to any of us. Words of "Lenwisdom": Life throws ####### at us all the time: but HEY!!! We kicked MTL's azz when it seemed impossible, didn't we?????

Thank you... to you and to everyone here that has commented on this.

This is not the first time I've filed a complaint with the EEOC. I had to do it at a past job, too. They changed the policies around so much and took away so many privileges needlessly that it caused me to break down. Then they changed the shifts to 9.5-hour Mondays, 8.5-hour Tuesdays, 7.5-hour Wednesdays and Thursdays, and 7-hour Fridays, which there was NO WAY IN HELL I could do. But the people who were going to school could keep their regular 8-hour shifts. And you know what the EEOC said? They said it was a "borderline case", but they didn't have enough to prove a definite violation. Funny, since I had the actual e-mails as proof of what they did WAS a violation of the ADA.

I have NO faith in the ADA anymore. It's only for people with physical disabilities that can actually be seen.

[SpiritAlight 1]

Oh Necrotica,

How horrible to be fighting with every breath for your rights.

It totally sucks!

I can see you have fight left in you so

GO GET 'EM GIRRRRRL!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A vent about flying ORD to YUL and back.

Check out the exorbitant fees:

Passenger Type: Adult (hey that is supposedly me!)

Flight 1 - Departing airfare (Tango Plus) 194.00

Flight 2 - Returning airfare (Tango Plus) 196.00

Surcharges NAV 115.00

U.S.A Transportation Tax US 37.87

Sub Total 542.87

Taxes, Fees and Charges

Canada Airport Improvement Fee SQ 20.16 (still???? forever paying improvement fees!)

U.S Agriculture Fee XA 5.00

Air Travellers Security Charge (ATSC) CA 8.41

U.S Passenger Facility Charge XF 4.50

U.S. Flight Segment Tax ZP 7.00

Canada Quebec Sales Tax (QST #1000-043-172) XQ 1.59

Canada Goods and Services Tax (GST/HST #10009-2287) XG 1.01

September 11 Security Fee AY 2.50

U.S.A Immigration User Fee XY 7.00 (grrrrrr)

Total airfare and taxes before options (per passenger) 600.04

Number Of Passengers 1

Grand Total - US Dollars $600.04

I think I'm just going to go with plan A and drive....although with the price of fuel these days...

[Flames9_RN 358]

fuel costs only get worse in Canada and even worse over in Europe

[MrsCat 6]

Where the F is my DS-230 FORM?!

[Necrotica 0]

I'm having a major mental crisis, and I have no idea what to do. I just called my parents, who are the ONLY ones I can talk to about stuff like this, and the call ended horribly. Having to deal with me when I am like this is not one of Réjean's strong points, so that's out.

I have all these incurable disabilities, I'm about to lose yet another job because of them, and I am feeling like an absolute failure as a human being and am completely hopeless at this point.

Don't even mention calling 1-800-SUICIDE; it's a joke and they make you feel even sh*ttier than before you called. I know because I've tried calling them in the past.

Edited May 30, 2008 by Necrotica

[MrsCat 6]

I'm having a major mental crisis, and I have no idea what to do. I just called my parents, who are the ONLY ones I can talk to about stuff like this, and the call ended horribly. Having to deal with me when I am like this is not one of Réjean's strong points, so that's out.

I have all these incurable disabilities, I'm about to lose yet another job because of them, and I am feeling like an absolute failure as a human being and am completely hopeless at this point.

Don't even mention calling 1-800-SUICIDE; it's a joke and they make you feel even sh*ttier than before you called. I know because I've tried calling them in the past.

I am sorry to hear of the despair that you're feeling right now. I'm afraid that I am not really good at saying anything inspirational, so I'll just leave it as - I hope these difficulties pass quickly. It so hard to feel so helpless, when all you want is to be well.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

I'm having a major mental crisis, and I have no idea what to do. I just called my parents, who are the ONLY ones I can talk to about stuff like this, and the call ended horribly. Having to deal with me when I am like this is not one of Réjean's strong points, so that's out.

I have all these incurable disabilities, I'm about to lose yet another job because of them, and I am feeling like an absolute failure as a human being and am completely hopeless at this point.

Don't even mention calling 1-800-SUICIDE; it's a joke and they make you feel even sh*ttier than before you called. I know because I've tried calling them in the past.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Necrotia,)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I am so very sorry you are having such a difficult time. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all better for you.

You are absolutely not a failure as a human being - you are a woman faced with a lot of difficult challenges and feeling overwhelmed because you just don't know where to go, or what else may be coming. That is totally natural! Anyone with any modicum of common sense would feel the same way. You are doing the best that you can in a difficult situation. It is very challenging when you, as a unique individual, has to try and fit into a one-size fits all world. Unfortunately, we are not all one-size and some of us find trying to meet society's demands on us, that we just cannot fit no matter how hard we try. This is not a failure, nor is it a flaw or a fault or anything to blame. Nor is it fair. It is indeed one of those situations that can make us or break us.

Something I have found that helped at times when I felt hopeless and overwhelmed was to think forward in time, that in one year from now whatever I am dealing with has been faced and done with; it will be behind me and I have dealt with it. It feels reassuring, that I will 'make' it, no matter what. In the meantime, just take it one day at a time. Just keep reminding yourself that 'I can do today' and don't let the immediate future overwhelm you. If sometime happens or goes wrong, don't blame yourself, just keep reminding yourself that you are doing the best that you can, one day at a time. One day, it WILL all be behind you and you will be on the other side and you will be just fine!

I hope this journey becomes easier for you, and you will find a smoother path ahead. There is no other 'you' in the whole, wide world - and no one can do 'you' better than 'you'. That is how important you are!

Edited May 30, 2008 by Kathryn41

[L_n_O 3]

Guys, I think I have a form of hives..

A little history first: Whenever I get a bug bite of any sort, the spot that I get bit becomes a huge hard itchy welt... toonie size and up..

Last week, I got 3 bites on my right arm. Since they were near eachother, they swelled to about a dollar bill size. The swelling lasted for about a week. The darkness in the skin is finally starting to fade..

So, we went to PA for Memorial day weekend and I got a bite on my right hand ring finger.. By the next day, my whole finger looked like a sausage.. I had it on ice packs, took benadryl, allegra d and advil and nothing really worked. I couldn't bend my finger or write! It lasted for about 24 hrs. You can still see the bite site now on it but it's not ittchy anymore and it's only red and about 1 cm x 1 cm

Yesterday afternoon: my left hand was itchy (area between my fingers and wrist...) so I scratched it for about 5 seconds.. didn't look like a bite or anything.. just really itchy burning..

It was quite itchy all night after that and I put tons of cortisone cream on it (that stuff doesn't seem to make any difference for me!) and extra strength benadryl cream (with results like the cortisone cream)

I even woke up about 3-4 times in the middle of the night to re-apply the cream that I store under my pillow while I sleep!!@#$

and now, I wake up at 8:15 in the morning ... why you ask? you all know I'm not a morning person unless I have to wake up for work or something..... why would I wake up so early on my own?

CUZ MY FREAKING LEFT HAND IS NOW COMPLETELY SWOLLEN... YOU KNOW THE AREA BETWEEN YOUR FINGERS AND YOUR WRIST.. THAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE BONEY BECAUSE THERE'S NO REAL FLESH THERE.. WELL, MINE'S FAT AND ITCHY AND SWOLLEN AND IT FEELS LIKE AN ETERNAL BURNING SENSATION AND i JUST DOUSED IT IN CALAMINE LOTION WHICH IS DOING NOTHING BUT MAKING MY HAND LOOK WHITE-PINK. IT'S PAINFUL TO TYPE!

YOUR HAND DOESN'T HAVE FLESH THERE BECAUSE IT ALLOWS FOR MOVEMENT OF YOUR FINGERS!!

So I just googled "itch swollen" and i found some reports of people who weirdly enough have had the same recurring itchy spots on their arm, finger, hand etc and it's all been within a few weeks and they lasted for 24-48 hrs also and it felt like hell and they got all swollen and itchy too..

and they said it's a kind of hive...

and all you can do is take benadryl or zyrtec and that's it...

I want to cut my hand off!!

I even slept last night without my ring on because of this!

and I don't have medical insurance...........

but I doubt a doctor would really be able to help me fix this.....

[Flames9_RN 358]

Your in luck!! if you have NO insurance I know of a free clinic!!

Culmore Clinic (it is in a brick apartment complex in the basement--its a community resource center)

3304 Culmore Court, Unit B

Falls Church, VA 22041

703.379.5217 not sure if the # is current

The medical clinic itself is only open a few days each week, usually Tues/Wed, but if ya phoned they could tell you

The bad news, it is staffed by us student nurses, lol, BUT they just take down your information, take ur vitals, THEN you get to see a qualified Nurse Practitioner. If ya go, say hi from Scott (the canadain),lol Depending on the day, it could take a few hours. Clinic hours are normally 0830 - 1300. Either go early or go towards noon. I was there last semester, you will get excellent attention, just with only 1 NP, it can be a bit slow, and its totally FREE, and if all possible the NP will prescribe a drug from the target/walmart $4 prescription list. You wil get MUCH better medical advice there than the internet!!

Edited May 30, 2008 by flames9

[L_n_O 3]

holy #######!

that's 1.9 miles from my apartment!

just called

they're only open Tues/wed and some thurs

[Flames9_RN 358]

its located in a small Spanish community. Like I said it is totally free--dont even get asked to make a donation--none is required as it is paid for by a VA grant to the school. And the students will love a english speaking person,lol as most of the clients are Spanish, which makes things very interesting,lol I can barely speak English!! So phone and see wht days the NVCC students are there. I think there may be anpther organization that puts on a clinic there as well, but not sure if it is free, but it would be at a very reduced rate

http://www.anhsi.org/map.html is another one, that offers a reduced rate, but ya need an appt. 2 East Glebe Road

Alexandria, VA 22305

(703) 535-5568

Culmore clinic is first come first served, and they see about 10 or 11 a day

[L_n_O 3]

Just took 2 benadryls.

keep you posted..

[Leafgal 3]

Flames that is great, I do have insurance and it is like 200 miles away but I am sure it can help out a lot of people. Liz I sure hope you get it fixed, I know what it is like I had an allergic reaction many years ago on a holiday weekend and had to go to the hospital my hands and feet were on fire and I had to itch and that only made it more itchy and burn more, they gave me a shot of Benedryl and some pills to get me through the weekend and that worked, sorry that it isn't working for you. I don't even know of any allergy medicines that work other than the 2 you mentioned would be the best I have taken. And I never did know what caused the reaction.

Edited May 30, 2008 by Leafgal

[L_n_O 3]

that's what's making me crazy!

not knowing what is causing this!

[Flames9_RN 358]

I'm having a major mental crisis, and I have no idea what to do. I just called my parents, who are the ONLY ones I can talk to about stuff like this, and the call ended horribly. Having to deal with me when I am like this is not one of Réjean's strong points, so that's out.

I have all these incurable disabilities, I'm about to lose yet another job because of them, and I am feeling like an absolute failure as a human being and am completely hopeless at this point.

Don't even mention calling 1-800-SUICIDE; it's a joke and they make you feel even sh*ttier than before you called. I know because I've tried calling them in the past.

This isn't my area of expertise but it sounds like you are looking for some one to talk with? I'm not a religious person, but sometime church's have a great wealth of knowledge when it comes to social support. they know of free of low cost clinics that has some one you could talk to and get some guidance. As well if there are any universities in your area that have a medical program, lot of them offer free services. yes you will speak to students, BUT we students are highly motivated and are supervised by a trained professional. Our school offers 3 free clinical sites, of course it is only manned a few days each week.

One problem we guys have when it comes to communication is that we are FIXERS!!!!! When in most instances the spouse just wants the fellow to LISTEN!! So that can take a bit for the guy to get used to. What i do some times when my wife has a problem, i ask "Do you want me to fix it? or listen? And most of the times it is listen! And of course listening doesn't involve the TV being on with a can of beer,lol. The guy should ask questions every now and then, but not in a "fixer" way,lol Even if us guys just sat there and said nothing (and thought about hockey) but appeared to be paying attention, in most cases the spouse would be happy,lol Listening is such a powerful tool and many don't know how to do it.