Ex-Pats and Other New Friends

[jazzette 0]

My husband is from Ireland and here in Queens NY (also in above the bronx in Yonkers) there is a large Irish community.

My husband has many friends and about 35% are Americans (Yanks as they call them) but I must admit the best time he has is when he is having the Craig (pronounced crack) with the Irish boys.

But as he says, you better not tell a cop your are "just having the Craig" or you might get arrested.

[britty 1]

I belonged to a trio of best friends in London. We did everything together and saw eachother at least twice a week. I thought I would die when I moved to the US. I missed them so much and would rack up huge phone bills, spending hours on the phone. I also missed my work colleagues, and going to the pub or lunch on a daily basis.

I met my closest friend here in the US quite by accident (she is a USC), and I couldn't ask for a better friend. We see eachother once a week for lunch or shopping or dinner. We have great fun together and she is an absolute love. I have other friends here too, including a couple of Brits that again I met quite by accident. I still see my girlfriends in the UK about three times a year and we have a great time when we are together. I think if you are used to having a great social circle and great friendships, then its only healthy to continue that here in the US.

I am sure you will meet new friends, and remember you always have your pals back home. If you are anywhere near Washington DC then send me an email and we'll go out on the lash !!!!!

[Cdnwmn 0]

Haven't gone and sought out other Canadians. The friends we have are all Americans.

[MissStacey 1]

I don't look for or seek out others from Canada. Just because we're from the same country doesn't mean I will like them or have anything other than that in common. I prefer to make friends with people I actually have more things in common with. Talking about Canada and junk like Tim Hortons or the Tragically Hip, doesn't mean anything to me. I didn't do that back home and I sure don't want to do that now.

Hmmm, I'm surprised you have any friends at all.

[StillThePrettiest 3]

britty, just out of interest, what sort of 'accidents' led to you meeting those friends you mentioned?

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

I'm from Canada, and after seeing how many people move or immigrate from Canada to the US, I thought it would be cool to seek out other Canadians in St. Louis. I've looked through various websites, and meet up places, but I'm not finding anyone.

Tim Horton's is working their way down. They're in PA, OH and even KY by now. Won't be long and you'll have one in St. Louis. Then you will have no problem finding Canadians in your area.

[MHandMB 0]

Well, I'm the American part of our couple, and evam *I* have a hard time meeting new people. It's just not as easy as being in college or high school when you could meet people in class or study groups. My closest friends have all moved to different parts of the country within the past few years, so it's been kind of difficult. I started a new job at a large company, so I am definitely meeting new people at work, but it's sometimes difficult to take the next step and get together after work.

My husband has met several good friends at the mosque, and they are all Algerian. 1 of them has had to go back to Algeria, but the other 2 are just great and he has felt like he has a piece of home here in the U.S. He doesn't really have a lot of American friends yet, although he does really get along with some of my guy friends, and my best friend's husband. He clicks the best with his Algerian buddies, though. I honestly think it;'s helped him to adjust more smoothly.

[britbird 4]

I purposefully avoid most things british, with the exception sometimes of going to the World Market to get some british chocolate bars. If i wanted to hang out with british people I would stay in the UK. I don't mind where my friends are from as long as they are cool people.

I much prefer life in the US - people are more friendly, much more easy to get to know, and the opportunities to do stuff (whether it it be work or play) are so much better.

Just try to put yourself in the position of hanging out with people when you get here - volunteering, taking classes, etc are all v. good.

[FutureAmerican 2]

Although I haven't been here that long (just over a month), I haven't really bothered to look for fellow ex-pats. I guess it's partly because, like others have stated, my life is in the US now and so I prefer to look for those who I can talk about US life with - on the other hand it is an advantage being from outside the country in a way, as it's an easy way to break the ice with new acquaintances (such as those I've just started work with) - telling the whole tale of my move here, differences in life between the US and the UK. There's a staff barbecue coming up, and so that'll be a great way to socialise with more people.

Generally speaking, I prefer to find friends through my common interests, such as the local shooting range, Krav Maga club, gym etc. Haven't yet found a good church yet, but am working on that. I've met a couple of people off other forums I belong to - such as Law Enforcement related ones.

Each to their own though - just personally I prefer to meet people with common interests rather than my former country.

[StillThePrettiest 3]

it's so interesting hearing everyone's attitudes to the issue; thank you to all who have replied

I'd heartily agree with your final phrase, FutureAmerican - I, too, much prefer to find friends through areas of common interest, and anyway what will guarantee that you (one) will get on with people just because they were born the same place as you? so full agreement there, and certainly I never deliberately looked up ex-pats after moving to London; just made friends with whoever came along (and of course there were some Aussies amongst them; you can't avoid them over here )

still, I suspect I'm going to feel even more foreign in the US than I did here, and my cousin, who recently spent six months in Portland, Oregon, for work, said she never stopped being treated as someone rather exotic; everyone was interested in her accent, everyone wanted to know where she was from and what she was doing in the States... of course that's another way to meet people, and she quite enjoyed it, but I don't know that I'm going to feel quite the same way about it

anyway, as I said above: it's been a very interesting conversation so far; still interested in hearing other opinions if they're out there

[bakofoil 27]

I purposefully avoid most things british, with the exception sometimes of going to the World Market to get some british chocolate bars. If i wanted to hang out with british people I would stay in the UK. I don't mind where my friends are from as long as they are cool people.

I much prefer life in the US - people are more friendly, much more easy to get to know, and the opportunities to do stuff (whether it it be work or play) are so much better.

Just try to put yourself in the position of hanging out with people when you get here - volunteering, taking classes, etc are all v. good.

I'm looking forward to my life out in the US. For me, my life in the UK very much revolves around work. A lot of my 'free time' is spent doing prep for work and so I often don't have the energy to socialise as much as I feel I should and end up relaxing in front of the TV or the computer. My good friends have all dispersed around the country and so the people I do socialise with regularly have usually been work-mates. Conversations tend to revolve around work and I would rather chat about anything but work. Steering the conversation off-topic can be difficult sometimes

I have found that people in the US make more of an effort to enjoy their free time. My fiance's family and friends spend a lot of time together and it is a real pleasure for me to experience that. Plus, going to restaurants, the cinema, daytrips are much more affordable over in the US compared with here. When I move out there I'm going to make the effort to meet people outside of his circle as I hate the feeling of dependency. I certainly don't think that should be confined to ex-pats for anyone going through this process.

When I was last over there I found a British store in Morro Bay. It was full of the usual stereotypical patriotic stuff but I was very excited to find a can of dandelion and burdock just so I could share a taste experience of my own with my fiance's family.

[Welshcookie 17]

Exactly what I have done. Talking about back home gets boring and it's nice to just have friends that you have other than that in common with.

I understood what you were saying

[Ta Ta 1]

I am a naturalized German and don't seek out people from Germany. Whoever I click with is more important than Nationality to me.

I do have a lot African friends that I have a lot in common with though.

The " German " festivals around here just lack authenticity and I don't go to them often.

[bostonparis 0]

My husband doesn't want to seek out other French people. He says he wants to assimilate here, and if he's with other French people, they'll speak French, talk about French things, etc.

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

I am a naturalized German and don't seek out people from Germany. Whoever I click with is more important than Nationality to me.

I do have a lot African friends that I have a lot in common with though.

The " German " festivals around here just lack authenticity and I don't go to them often.

Same here. Those "German" festivals... LOL.