Help needed please.

[samiam 0]

My wife received a call from a friend last night that could really use some advice right now.

My wife met this lady when she went for her K-1 interview at the embassy in her home country and they have stayed in touch and have become friends. She lived in Florida and we are in Colorado. Last night she called from the airport crying her eyes out because her husband had bought her a one way ticket back to her country. He took her permanent resident card and social security card away from her along with all her other papers and told her he was going to file for divorce and that she had to go back to her country because her permanent resident card would not be valid any longer and several other lies as well and then droped her of in front of the airport and drove away. We told her she could stay for a short time with us to give her time to decide what she wants to do and what her options are and she is here with us now.

I have eplained to her that after she is devorced she can file to lift conditions on her own and that she is here legaly for now at least until her card expires in june of 2009 I see there is lots of good information on lifting conditions after devorce here on this forum. But I am not sure how to advise her what her options are regarding looking for financial assistance. He gave her very little money when he took her to the airport and the aplication I-90 to replace her permanent residence card together with the $80.00 biometrics fee is $370.00 without her greencard she will have a hard time finding a job and I don't have the recources to help her much myself.

Can anyone tell me about how long it takes to recieve a replacement permanent resident card?

Also can she aply here and then have her biometrics in another city?

What kind of assistance is available to someone in her situation if any?

If she returns to her country how long can she stay without losing her legal status here in the USA?

Thank you in advance for any advice you may be able to offer.

[Jaseball 0]

I would suggest she hire a divorce attorney and contact local police where she lives and go back to her home. I'm sure her husband would love for her to take off without a peep, but it sounds like they have been married for enough time that she has a claim and not only that, the guy signed to support her.

It is illegal for that jerk off to strip her of her ID papers and abuse her like that. She actually has far more rights now and can't be forced from the house.

The police report is very important. Start documenting the abuse and have the cops go with her to the house and reclaim her papers. If that jack hole has destroyed them it is even more evidence of abuse.

This guy probably has no clue what a world of hurt she can bring down on his ###.

Have her take the offensive if all that you wrote is true. It is disgusting to uproot someone, have them give up their life to come here, and take advantage like that.

She can file on her own. She is entitled to support from the husband. The police and her own lawyer is what counts and once the guy realizes she isn't some clueless immigrant and has people who help and give advice he is screwed.

Edited October 14, 2007 by Jaseball

[caybee 21]

I would suggest she hire a divorce attorney and contact local police where she lives and go back to her home. I'm sure her husband would love for her to take off without a peep, but it sounds like they have been married for enough time that she has a claim and not only that, the guy signed to support her.

It is illegal for that jerk off to strip her of her ID papers and abuse her like that. She actually has far more rights now and can't be forced from the house.

The police report is very important. Start documenting the abuse and have the cops go with her to the house and reclaim her papers. If that jack hole has destroyed them it is even more evidence of abuse.

This guy probably has no clue what a world of hurt she can bring down on his ###.

Have her take the offensive if all that you wrote is true. It is disgusting to uproot someone, have them give up their life to come here, and take advantage like that.

She can file on her own. She is entitled to support from the husband. The police and her own lawyer is what counts and once the guy realizes she isn't some clueless immigrant and has people who help and give advice he is screwed.

Ditto to everything you said. Her green card and Social Security card are not his to "take away," and he just dumped her at the airport like that, wow. Wonder why he didn't just escort her inside and put her on the plane himself? Maybe because he knew what he was doing was illegal? Grrrrr... I hope she stays strong and takes him on.

[kim&james 0]

I would take your friend to your local police station to start all this process and help her find a lawyer in your area. Obviously the husband cant just do as he feels like when she has lots of rights here in this country.

Personally, that husband is just low. No one deserves to be treated like that and Im thinking along the same lines as the others above, he was hoping that she would just get on the plane and everything would be nice and easy for him. She has rights and she should take full advantage of all of them.

[Drew and Tik 0]

Coming from a police officer in New York, that constitutes a very serious felony here. At least Grand Larceny, along with many other charges that could be brought up in addition to that. If you do this right, he's going to jail (and not a short amount of time) and she'll get her papers back. As far as her being able to stay here, I know very little about immigration law, only about the penal and criminal procedure laws.

[samiam 0]

Thank you all for your responses.

At this time she is still in shock and heart broken and the anger stage has not yet set in.

She does not have the money for a lawyer and has expressed to my wife that she still cares very much for her husband and does not want to make any trouble for him. She does not want his money or anything else from him only her cards and the truth.

We have explained her rights to her as best we understand them and what the consequences might be for him depending on what she does at this point and she is addament that she does not want to create any problems for him. He logged on to her I.M. today and found out through her family that she did not return to her country and then called my house and told her that she is here illegaly and that he can not believe that she did not go back.

She has sent him an email letting him know that she now knows her rights.

Personally I find it hard to believe that he is creating these kind of problems for her knowing what the results might be for him.

Hopefuly he will come to his senses and send her cards to her.

Thanks again and I will keep you posted as to what happens.

[moon1968 0]

I dont know much about her situation other then at this point he is responsible for her.....Please keep us up to date on the situation and I hope things do get better for her soon.....

[Jaseball 0]

There is this good saying I keep close to heart.

"Never want someone who doesn't want you."

If what you posted is true, then this guy had a person who is his wife leave her country, uproot all her contacts, wait through this BS visa process, cross the ocean to be with him, and after a brief period he is tossing her out like last week's garbage.

She may care for him, may still love him, but ask her to put her feelings aside and just look at his actions recently and ask her if he feels the same way about her?

She needs the police report, needs her ID cards and papers, and it doesn't matter if she is broke. The attorney will take the case because the husband is on the hook for the divorce process. She is owed this much from all this and regardless of how things end up she is entitled to someone watching out for her, alimony, and a PLR status from her time here.

I can't make her do anything, but she should know she is in the driver's seat here and the husband is doing all he can to get rid of her without fulfilling his obligations. It is up to her to take a stand, get a lawyer, file a police report, and document her status, as well as get her papers back.

Don't let someone make you into a victim. Take this ####### to task for his obligations and empower this woman to her rights and a better life.

[caybee 21]

Thank you all for your responses.

At this time she is still in shock and heart broken and the anger stage has not yet set in.

She does not have the money for a lawyer and has expressed to my wife that she still cares very much for her husband and does not want to make any trouble for him. She does not want his money or anything else from him only her cards and the truth.

We have explained her rights to her as best we understand them and what the consequences might be for him depending on what she does at this point and she is addament that she does not want to create any problems for him. He logged on to her I.M. today and found out through her family that she did not return to her country and then called my house and told her that she is here illegaly and that he can not believe that she did not go back.

She has sent him an email letting him know that she now knows her rights.

Personally I find it hard to believe that he is creating these kind of problems for her knowing what the results might be for him.

Hopefuly he will come to his senses and send her cards to her.

Thanks again and I will keep you posted as to what happens.

So he took away her papers, gave her very little money and dumped her at the airport like a discarded kitten, and this is her take on it all, a classic response to abuse. She has realized her rights, but it doesn't sound like she has let herself realize that this man she loves is abusing her even now and deserves no respect, using her account to talk with her family and trying to intimidate her. He made his own bed when he stole her papers and mistreated her like this. By reporting him to the police, she will not be creating any problems for him. His problems will be the result of the choices he already made himself. He is lower than low. He expects her to be helpless, to just *poof* disappear when it's convenient for him. Too bad she has friends, huh? He doesn't need or deserve her protection.

I understand that she's still in shock. I hope when she feels more settled and has had some good sleep, she can see the situation with fresh eyes.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

She needs the police report, needs her ID cards and papers, and it doesn't matter if she is broke. The attorney will take the case because the husband is on the hook for the divorce process. She is owed this much from all this and regardless of how things end up she is entitled to someone watching out for her, alimony, and a PLR status from her time here.

I can't make her do anything, but she should know she is in the driver's seat here and the husband is doing all he can to get rid of her without fulfilling his obligations. It is up to her to take a stand, get a lawyer, file a police report, and document her status, as well as get her papers back.

Don't let someone make you into a victim. Take this ####### to task for his obligations and empower this woman to her rights and a better life.

I am not going to refute some of the advice given, but please look at this practically. The issue is not a police issue. And I suspect that if police were summoned, they'd be limited in what they could do for her. My suspicion is that they would look at this as a civil matter, which can only be resolved through civil legal channels. He's not a criminal for not taking care of his wife...he is in breach of a contract, but that is not the same as being in breach of a law. Taking her sopcial security and PR card, I suspect, would also be categorised as a dispute, even though they are not his to keep, in the marriage context, the police have little latitude to consider the possession of other's personal possessions as theft. I'd also be surprised that this could be construed as abuse. It is, nonetheless, a dispute. Please advise this friend to consult with a lawyer, rather than to fill her with hopes that might lead her nowhere.

[maya62 7]

She could try to bluff him by telling him that he has, say, 48 hours to Fedex her documents (and copies of all their immigration paperwork and bona fides of their marriage and anything else she'll need to Remove Conditions) or she will go to the police to try to get her documents back. I don't see how at least having a police report documenting events thus far could hurt her case, even if the police can't really help her.

Also consider contacting a pro bono immigration lawyer... here's a link to Immigrations Services offered by Catholic Charities of the Denver Archdiocese for starters:

http://ccdenver.org/Services/Immigration-Services.aspx

Or she could talk to the lawyer first if she really wants to play it safe...

Best wishes,

Maya

PS. What's to keep this guy from doing this to someone else??

[Jaseball 0]

I am not going to refute some of the advice given, but please look at this practically. The issue is not a police issue. And I suspect that if police were summoned, they'd be limited in what they could do for her. My suspicion is that they would look at this as a civil matter, which can only be resolved through civil legal channels. He's not a criminal for not taking care of his wife...he is in breach of a contract, but that is not the same as being in breach of a law. Taking her sopcial security and PR card, I suspect, would also be categorised as a dispute, even though they are not his to keep, in the marriage context, the police have little latitude to consider the possession of other's personal possessions as theft. I'd also be surprised that this could be construed as abuse. It is, nonetheless, a dispute. Please advise this friend to consult with a lawyer, rather than to fill her with hopes that might lead her nowhere.

Actually you're wrong. Police are called all the time for domestic disturbances. Having someone strip your ID and papers and kicking them out of the house qualifies. There is also the matter of this guy threatening her and saying she needs to leave the country. The police should be involved because she needs a police report and documentation of the abuse.

Getting a lawyer first is fine and a good idea. Go by what the lawyer suggests, but Id be surprised if s/he doesn't suggest starting to document events through official channels.

[Aussielad 37]

She needs the police report, needs her ID cards and papers, and it doesn't matter if she is broke. The attorney will take the case because the husband is on the hook for the divorce process. She is owed this much from all this and regardless of how things end up she is entitled to someone watching out for her, alimony, and a PLR status from her time here.

I can't make her do anything, but she should know she is in the driver's seat here and the husband is doing all he can to get rid of her without fulfilling his obligations. It is up to her to take a stand, get a lawyer, file a police report, and document her status, as well as get her papers back.

Don't let someone make you into a victim. Take this ####### to task for his obligations and empower this woman to her rights and a better life.

I am not going to refute some of the advice given, but please look at this practically. The issue is not a police issue. And I suspect that if police were summoned, they'd be limited in what they could do for her. My suspicion is that they would look at this as a civil matter, which can only be resolved through civil legal channels. He's not a criminal for not taking care of his wife...he is in breach of a contract, but that is not the same as being in breach of a law. Taking her sopcial security and PR card, I suspect, would also be categorised as a dispute, even though they are not his to keep, in the marriage context, the police have little latitude to consider the possession of other's personal possessions as theft. I'd also be surprised that this could be construed as abuse. It is, nonetheless, a dispute. Please advise this friend to consult with a lawyer, rather than to fill her with hopes that might lead her nowhere.

yes, but both are federal government cards, im sure if the police know this, they can push for that to be handed over, it is a dispute yes, understand that, but also, by him doing this, ALTHOUGH SHE CAN file for a replacement of her residency card,.....is he not holding her hostage to the immigration process to some extent, and, i do agree with one of the above posters, its grand larency, because by the sounds of it, he has no intention of giving it back, i mean, easily resolved for her in filing for a new S.S. card and residency card, but he still falls under one of those offenses doesnt he?

[Aussielad 37]

She needs the police report, needs her ID cards and papers, and it doesn't matter if she is broke. The attorney will take the case because the husband is on the hook for the divorce process. She is owed this much from all this and regardless of how things end up she is entitled to someone watching out for her, alimony, and a PLR status from her time here.

I can't make her do anything, but she should know she is in the driver's seat here and the husband is doing all he can to get rid of her without fulfilling his obligations. It is up to her to take a stand, get a lawyer, file a police report, and document her status, as well as get her papers back.

Don't let someone make you into a victim. Take this ####### to task for his obligations and empower this woman to her rights and a better life.

I am not going to refute some of the advice given, but please look at this practically. The issue is not a police issue. And I suspect that if police were summoned, they'd be limited in what they could do for her. My suspicion is that they would look at this as a civil matter, which can only be resolved through civil legal channels. He's not a criminal for not taking care of his wife...he is in breach of a contract, but that is not the same as being in breach of a law. Taking her sopcial security and PR card, I suspect, would also be categorised as a dispute, even though they are not his to keep, in the marriage context, the police have little latitude to consider the possession of other's personal possessions as theft. I'd also be surprised that this could be construed as abuse. It is, nonetheless, a dispute. Please advise this friend to consult with a lawyer, rather than to fill her with hopes that might lead her nowhere.

thats why the police are called to "PROTECT and to SERVE" right??

[diadromous mermaid 36]

She needs the police report, needs her ID cards and papers, and it doesn't matter if she is broke. The attorney will take the case because the husband is on the hook for the divorce process. She is owed this much from all this and regardless of how things end up she is entitled to someone watching out for her, alimony, and a PLR status from her time here.

I can't make her do anything, but she should know she is in the driver's seat here and the husband is doing all he can to get rid of her without fulfilling his obligations. It is up to her to take a stand, get a lawyer, file a police report, and document her status, as well as get her papers back.

Don't let someone make you into a victim. Take this ####### to task for his obligations and empower this woman to her rights and a better life.

I am not going to refute some of the advice given, but please look at this practically. The issue is not a police issue. And I suspect that if police were summoned, they'd be limited in what they could do for her. My suspicion is that they would look at this as a civil matter, which can only be resolved through civil legal channels. He's not a criminal for not taking care of his wife...he is in breach of a contract, but that is not the same as being in breach of a law. Taking her sopcial security and PR card, I suspect, would also be categorised as a dispute, even though they are not his to keep, in the marriage context, the police have little latitude to consider the possession of other's personal possessions as theft. I'd also be surprised that this could be construed as abuse. It is, nonetheless, a dispute. Please advise this friend to consult with a lawyer, rather than to fill her with hopes that might lead her nowhere.

thats why the police are called to "PROTECT and to SERVE" right??

Sorry, but none of you is understanding that this is after the fact and a case of whether or not the police will be ready to take a position on "who did what to whom". In marital relations, the police can't always be the arbitor.....and most specifically after-the fact. Were these two people totally unrelated, then yes, a person having a social security card belonging to another would be clearly a case of stolen identity, but in the case of a man and his wife, tell me, are there not people right here on this forum that have at one point in time or another, say, had the other's identification in one's possession? For those inclined to say no, I think you are kidding yourselves!

I agree that if he had been threatening her and holding her cards in his hands when the police arrived, then I would admit the police could intervene, but at this point who is to say what precipitated the dispute. The police are not in place to settle arguments. They are in place to prevent crimes, or to investigate crimes....but until a crime has been committed, they are pretty much impotent. I am not taking sides, but who is to say that she could not have had an argument and asked to be taken to the airport, and forgotten her cards?