Second time around

[MelindaandTarek 0]

no frikkin way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IF I EVER saw myself in a situation where I was dating again, (and if I ever even DATED again btw I would hope that someone I know would commit me for good to a mental institutaion)............there are requirements that I would need:

1) US CITIZENSHIP

2) GOOD INCOME (mom was right...you can LEARN to love them )

there are others but this is a family board.

doodle - this cracked me up and i do have the in re:what u need to be committed to a mental institution...of course I came across this info professionally..lol.....oh us social workers, the things we know.....anywho..

[deemabrouk 0]

I know there have been several but not necessarily from MENA

Which was why I wanted to make a general poll.. but at this point I am WAyyy to lazy

[Kimberlyanne 0]

if it means to reapply for the 1st man ,, yes definitely i would do it all over again ,, hes worth it . yes i sometimes get aggravatted with the lonely depressing wait , but i love my fiance with all my heart. i would definitely apply for him a second or third time ,,,,

melinda you come up with some of the funniest replies ive seen ,, keep your head up ....and have fun on your visit ,,,

[chaishai 1]

I would.

First let me say that my husband and I have no issues and have had two wonderful kids together.... So hopefully we will never break up.

If I were in that situation I could see it happening though. I am jewish and would only marry another jew. I am attracted to dark middle eastern looking men. Most dark middle eastern looking men are israelis. If he was not a US citizen I would probably go thru the process again.

Then again the process wasnt difficult for me. He was here on an overextended work visa and never had to leave the country. We just couldnt go to israel to visit (and have our religious wedding) until we had his visa.

[chaishai 1]

I would.

First let me say that my husband and I have no issues and have had two wonderful kids together.... So hopefully we will never break up.

If I were in that situation I could see it happening though. I am jewish and would only marry another jew. I am attracted to dark middle eastern looking men. Most dark middle eastern looking men are israelis. If he was not a US citizen I would probably go thru the process again.

Then again the process wasnt difficult for me. He was here on an overextended work visa and never had to leave the country. We just couldnt go to israel to visit (and have our religious wedding) until we had his visa.

EDITED: "Most dark middle eastern looking men are israelis" That was a stupid statement. Most JEWISH dark middle eastern looking men are israelis.

[Jenn! 918]

I would.

First let me say that my husband and I have no issues and have had two wonderful kids together.... So hopefully we will never break up.

If I were in that situation I could see it happening though. I am jewish and would only marry another jew. I am attracted to dark middle eastern looking men. Most dark middle eastern looking men are israelis. If he was not a US citizen I would probably go thru the process again.

Then again the process wasnt difficult for me. He was here on an overextended work visa and never had to leave the country. We just couldnt go to israel to visit (and have our religious wedding) until we had his visa.

EDITED: "Most dark middle eastern looking men are israelis" That was a stupid statement. Most JEWISH dark middle eastern looking men are israelis.

I was definitely scratching my head over that one.

[sarah and hicham 3]

I would.

First let me say that my husband and I have no issues and have had two wonderful kids together.... So hopefully we will never break up.

If I were in that situation I could see it happening though. I am jewish and would only marry another jew. I am attracted to dark middle eastern looking men. Most dark middle eastern looking men are israelis. If he was not a US citizen I would probably go thru the process again.

Then again the process wasnt difficult for me. He was here on an overextended work visa and never had to leave the country. We just couldnt go to israel to visit (and have our religious wedding) until we had his visa.

EDITED: "Most dark middle eastern looking men are israelis" That was a stupid statement. Most JEWISH dark middle eastern looking men are israelis.

I was definitely scratching my head over that one.

Me too! I read it about 5 times then just exited the thread all together.

[dawnnhatem 0]

I would.

First let me say that my husband and I have no issues and have had two wonderful kids together.... So hopefully we will never break up.

If I were in that situation I could see it happening though. I am jewish and would only marry another jew. I am attracted to dark middle eastern looking men. Most dark middle eastern looking men are israelis. If he was not a US citizen I would probably go thru the process again.

Then again the process wasnt difficult for me. He was here on an overextended work visa and never had to leave the country. We just couldnt go to israel to visit (and have our religious wedding) until we had his visa.

EDITED: "Most dark middle eastern looking men are israelis" That was a stupid statement. Most JEWISH dark middle eastern looking men are israelis.

I was definitely scratching my head over that one.

Me too...

[LRA 0]

I will never say never, but I've doing my best to never let it happen! My Jordanian Aunt "so and so" wants to introduce me to her neighbors <daughter, sister, and other female relative>, I stop calling/talking to her, if my mom starts a sentence with "I met a nice girl...", I give her the silent treatment, or if my co-workers mention they have a cousin that lives in <fill in any foreign country>, I lie and tell them I am dating someone. It was hell before and she wasn't worth the time, effort and especially my hard earned money for a chance to live in greatest country on Earth with (allow me to be self-centered) one helluva "DUDE", not the worm. ;-) I don't think I could invest another 2 years and come out with nothing.

[MelindaandTarek 0]

if it means to reapply for the 1st man ,, yes definitely i would do it all over again ,, hes worth it . yes i sometimes get aggravatted with the lonely depressing wait , but i love my fiance with all my heart. i would definitely apply for him a second or third time ,,,,

melinda you come up with some of the funniest replies ive seen ,, keep your head up ....and have fun on your visit ,,,

ty Kimberlyanne - i tend to use humor - and ty i will enjoy my visit - u too - - and on a side note - i hope and feel i got it right this time...and if not - i would like to think i wouldn't do this again....but i hate to say never to anything.....

[JohnWendy 0]

I would run...... and run fast!

[Ahmed & Sue 0]

Hello All,

My 22 year old son always tells me I am living a "fairytale". What else can you call it? Well, fairytales have happy endings, don't they? As long as it is my fairytale, I might as well ask that this marriage lasts my lifetime so I don't have to even think about going through hell and back again.

But I have some questions for all of you. When you started your relationships, did you have any idea what the cultural differences would be like? Do you think after a lifetime of upbringing, it would be easy to discard learned ways (this goes for both of you)? Are you both willing to compromise? Did you ask alot of questions to understand what is expected of an Egyptian spouse? After asking, did you discuss the issues you had that were brought up? Did you explain what your expectations of him/her are? Did you ask what differences your loved one expected to see when he/she came here and then discuss them? Have the two of you discussed religion, sex and politics? ( This is a big one.) I know you are probably thinking I am looney tunes right now, and I am. AP does that to you. However, it has also given Ahmed amd I alot of time to talk about life and figure out what our strengths and weaknesses are.

Would I do it again? Well, I never thought I would do it this time. Go figure........

Sue

[sarah and hicham 3]

Hello All,

My 22 year old son always tells me I am living a "fairytale". What else can you call it? Well, fairytales have happy endings, don't they? As long as it is my fairytale, I might as well ask that this marriage lasts my lifetime so I don't have to even think about going through hell and back again.

But I have some questions for all of you. When you started your relationships, did you have any idea what the cultural differences would be like? Do you think after a lifetime of upbringing, it would be easy to discard learned ways (this goes for both of you)? Are you both willing to compromise? Did you ask alot of questions to understand what is expected of an Egyptian spouse? After asking, did you discuss the issues you had that were brought up? Did you explain what your expectations of him/her are? Did you ask what differences your loved one expected to see when he/she came here and then discuss them? Have the two of you discussed religion, sex and politics? ( This is a big one.) I know you are probably thinking I am looney tunes right now, and I am. AP does that to you. However, it has also given Ahmed amd I alot of time to talk about life and figure out what our strengths and weaknesses are.

Would I do it again? Well, I never thought I would do it this time. Go figure........

Sue

Why does he think you're living in a fairytale?

[amal 4]

But I have some questions for all of you. When you started your relationships, did you have any idea what the cultural differences would be like?

When our relationship started, I honestly thought that all ME'ers were terrorists and all ME countries were bad. I had no "real" idea what their culture was until I started talking to the hubster every day.

Do you think after a lifetime of upbringing, it would be easy to discard learned ways (this goes for both of you)?

Absolutely not. Hubster has been here allllllmost 2 years now and we're still working on our upbringing vs. each others ways.

Are you both willing to compromise?

I would have to say yes on some things and no on some things. This is a very hard milestone for us. We both thought it would be easier to accept our differences than it has been, although I can't really complain all that much about anything outside of the normal husband/wife complaints.

Did you ask alot of questions to understand what is expected of an Egyptian spouse?

no, can't say that I've ever asked what is to be expected of an Egyptian spouse but yeah, we did discuss culturally what was expected of spouses in each of our countries...and for both husbands and wives in both countries.

After asking, did you discuss the issues you had that were brought up?

You bet we did. We had countless hours of discussions on these things.

Did you explain what your expectations of him/her are?

We discussed everything from who should do the dishes / and why, to who should take out the trash/and why. We both fully understood what was expected of us before we got married.

Did you ask what differences your loved one expected to see when he/she came here and then discuss them?

We tried but neither of us were sure #1 how he was gonna feel once he got here and #2 he had no idea what it was really like to live here. I tried many times to explain things to him but nothing hit home faster or better than actually being here. Nothing can really prepare them for it imho.

Have the two of you discussed religion, sex and politics? ( This is a big one.)

Ohhh yeah....alllll the time. Religion was one of our daily discussions coz I wanted to know more about what my SO believed. The other stuff, mhmm we had many a talk about what our preferences were.

Good post. These are some of the most vital things to go over again and again until u know each other frontwords, backwards, sidewards...every which way, shape, and form.

As I stated before, nothing can prepare them for life in america as much as just being here. they think they have this idea of what it is like here (much like we had ideas of their countries before going there) and it is definitely a shock when they get here and see the reality of our day to day lives.

amal

Edited September 28, 2007 by amal

[PetraPerson101 0]

Did you ask alot of questions to understand what is expected of an Egyptian spouse?

While family was vacationing in Jordan - they rented an apartment. My *much* younger brother (I'm an Arab, remember? ) decided he was going to open and close the cast iron gate to the apartment at ... 12:00am.

Needless to say, after about the 20th time of doing that - the neighbor ... a very, very angry Egyptian woman ... came out on the balcony next door:

(translation)

"YOU LITTLE ANIMAL! WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM! I'M GOING TO COME DOWN THERE AND CHOP YOU INTO A MILLION PIECES!"

She then proceeded to storm down and start pounding on the door. My brother hid under a bed - while my aunt wondered what was going on (lol) and calmed the lady down. LOL. So, does that fit the Egyptian spouse?