If you need a Translator to talk to your SO...

[LaL 418]

Let me point out that the original question was not about ppl with a moderate language barrier, but one which would require some sort of translator....which TO ME when I wrote it meant a complete lack of a common language.

Which I think is worlds away from either person learning a second lang and not being totally fluent.

a translator... like a dictionary?

[Jenn! 918]

I guess that different things work for different people. Some may have thought that I was crazy starting a relationship with someone in a language that was a second language for both of us. Surely there were bound to be misunderstandings and challenges. Some people probably wouldn't be able to handle a relationship where they weren't assured of perfect clarity in communication all of the time, just as I wouldn't be able to handle a relationship with someone with whom I shared no common language.

[Fandango 1,439]

Let me point out that the original question was not about ppl with a moderate language barrier, but one which would require some sort of translator....which TO ME when I wrote it meant a complete lack of a common language.

Which I think is worlds away from either person learning a second lang and not being totally fluent.

a translator... like a dictionary?

a babel fish or a Tardis

[LaL 418]

Let me point out that the original question was not about ppl with a moderate language barrier, but one which would require some sort of translator....which TO ME when I wrote it meant a complete lack of a common language.

Which I think is worlds away from either person learning a second lang and not being totally fluent.

a translator... like a dictionary?

a babel fish or a Tardis

cool so my dictionary-laden relationship was more than 'lust'. lol

[JVKn'CVO 11]

This makes me think of those people that start sh!t with you about being in a LDR. "how can you be in love when you've spent most of your time apart?"

Only the 2 involved know what goes on in their relationship.

You can certainly learn about the other person by sharing long deep conversations (I love those!), but there can be many combinations that would lead to getting to know each other...out of the top of my head, a translator + actions.

Besides, having to learn the other one's language sounds like fun to me

Saludos,

Caro

[Fandango 1,439]

Let me point out that the original question was not about ppl with a moderate language barrier, but one which would require some sort of translator....which TO ME when I wrote it meant a complete lack of a common language.

Which I think is worlds away from either person learning a second lang and not being totally fluent.

a translator... like a dictionary?

a babel fish or a Tardis

cool so my dictionary-laden relationship was more than 'lust'. lol

Aww cmon LaL, I was just being honest and saying what it would mean TO ME...and if I couldn't learn anything about the man my partner is, then yeah I would see it as lust only since the physical would be the only thing we had.

Again, that's just TO ME Not meant to offend anyone here whatsoever.

[Fandango 1,439]

This makes me think of those people that start sh!t with you about being in a LDR. "how can you be in love when you've spent most of your time apart?"

Only the 2 involved know what goes on in their relationship.

You can certainly learn about the other person by sharing long deep conversations (I love those!), but there can be many combinations that would lead to getting to know each other...out of the top of my head, a translator + actions.

Besides, having to learn the other one's language sounds like fun to me

Saludos,

Caro

It's a valid question though, whether you like it or not.

Not having the physical (LDR), plus no means of communication other than let's say smileys and the like.....erm....how can you learn about the person you love?

It's not meant as a finger pointing question at all!

[LaL 418]

I'm not offended Just giving my take. It just seems pretty familiar - as in another one of those -

*how could you know if you were in love if you didn't meet in person?

*how can you spend so much time apart and still be in love?

*how can you love someone who's culture is so radically different from your own?

To start a thread with this curiosity, then to end up saying "i could *never* do that for me" just reeks *oh your in one of those relationships*, and that's just what I see for me. .

For clarity, cuz I love to clarify, its not just this thread, its multiple "curiosity" threads.

[JVKn'CVO 11]

I know it's a valid question Lisa

I just mean that every couple is different and a whole world on its own. There can be so many possibilities as to how and why they fell in love while not sharing a common language! maybe they chat and that's when they use the translator, and in the meantime they have fun learning a new language together. That is probably a nice thing to share.

Saludos,

Caro

[Fandango 1,439]

I'm not offended Just giving my take. It just seems pretty familiar - as in another one of those -

*how could you know if you were in love if you didn't meet in person?

*how can you spend so much time apart and still be in love?

*how can you love someone who's culture is so radically different from your own?

To start a thread with this curiosity, then to end up saying "i could *never* do that for me" just reeks *oh your in one of those relationships*, and that's just what I see for me. .

For clarity, cuz I love to clarify, its not just this thread, its multiple "curiosity" threads.

I say 'for me' because that's what it is....it's my opinion. Sometimes ppl can be totally oversensitive to things here and you see a lot of qualifiers such as 'IMO' 'for me' etc because one is trying to state one's opinion while trying not to offend anyone because someone will take it as a personal attack or that one is casting aspersions....It's a difficult thing to do sometimes, lol

Curiosity sometimes is just curiosity...

Edited October 9, 2007 by LisaD

[Caladan 19]

Where does one draw the line that determines what is an acceptable level of communication to be able to fall in love? I mean, the majority of couples here have some sort of language barrier, whether that means using an online translator to communicate, or one partner communicating in pretty basic level English (at least initially), or the USC speaking the foreign language. In all cases there will inevitably be those certain words or concepts that come up that make communication more challenging.

Online translators are pretty unreliable for anything beyond basic communication (as kids trying to translate their French homework quickly find out.) I'd wonder how you seriously discuss a major cultural difference or a life plan when the translator leaves half the words in pidgin and have untranslated. And I'd wonder the correlation between not speaking the language, marriage failure, or the perceived interchangeability of foreign spouses.

And I think there's a difference between someone struggling to learn the language and supplementing with a dictionary and someone who has been assured by the translator that she really loves him. It could work out. Marriages are weird. But I wouldn't have dated C. if we had to talk via a translating program or a friend. Too Cyrano for my tastes.

[Emancipation 2]

I know it worked for my brother and his wife (she's from China). She had limited use of spoken english when she arrived in Canada 2 years ago. Now she is fluent and my brother is working on mastering Mandarin. They did mis-communicate many many times mind you and one visit was cut very short because she was very tired of all the work it was taking as well as the fact that people stared at their skin color difference. She didn't like being in a glass bowl. Of course in Canada it's not such a "big deal" to be racially mixed, and they are a solid loving communicating couple!

[Alex+R 0]

Of course in Canada it's not such a "big deal" to be racially mixed

Huh? How is it such a big deal to be a racially mixed couple here? I mean in the sense that people stare at you in public. Does that still happen?

[KarenCee 3]

Of course in Canada it's not such a "big deal" to be racially mixed

Huh? How is it such a big deal to be a racially mixed couple here? I mean in the sense that people stare at you in public. Does that still happen?

You have obviously not heard of the Deep South. There are lots of mixed race couples but I can pretty much tell you that those couples are looked at...and not always in a good way. Yeah Alex, it still happens here in the good ol' US of A.

[almaty 19]

Of course in Canada it's not such a "big deal" to be racially mixed

Huh? How is it such a big deal to be a racially mixed couple here? I mean in the sense that people stare at you in public. Does that still happen?

You have obviously not heard of the Deep South. There are lots of mixed race couples but I can pretty much tell you that those couples are looked at...and not always in a good way. Yeah Alex, it still happens here in the good ol' US of A.

hell yes, and there are still comments made...

like a female white client was heckled by some local punks...cause her boyfriend is black..cal coalhauler..and old racial slur for this