is all the hassle worth it??

[skimutt 0]

I am wondering my options. After reading the numerous postings on this site, I'm wondering if I can negotiate the many obstacles set by the beauracracy of the U.S. immigration system. So many people have had problems. So many have been denied. No name on back of one photo; DENIED. One consulate differs from another at the whim of the idividual consulate officer. DENIED. The money checks are not labelled; DENIED. Is all this worth it?? It seems like it is a bigger gamble than trying to win the world series of poker.

My true love is in China. I have been there twice. We are madly in love. I would love to bring her to the United States. But, the nighmare of the immigration policies, seems overwhelming. I do not want to raise her hopes, only to be denied.I'm beginning to think it might be MUCH easier, to move to China and marry her there. Live there for a few years and file as husband and wife. Do a direct consular filing. Anyone have any thoughts on this? Is it hard to go this route also?? Can an American live in China with his wife?

Why is it so very easy to come in illegally, (Mexico) and yet so very difficult and risky to do things legally??

Please don't misunderstand me here, I want to do everything legally, and I am angry about our border situation. But, my GOD!! What a huge disconnect.

[True Love at Last 15]

YES ITS WORTH IT !

[arwensun1965 1]

Hi and Welcome to VJ, well only you can decide what is best for your situation, yes China is one of those countries that gets a lot of red flags (pardon the pun) but people have done it and done it well. All I can say is do your paper work correctly, triple check everything, do not rush. In which ever way you decide to do this I wish you the best of luck.

Janice

[JElsafty 0]

If you don't have a lot of patience and are not a strong person, then this whole process will seriously wear on you probably moreso than on others. This process is a battle and if you really love her, you will fight for you regardless of the time wait.

[meddykomp 0]

You have many options. K-1 is just one of them. I would suggest that you read as much information as you can about all of them and make the decision that is right for you. Most people will advise based on what they did or what they wish they did, which is not necessarily what is right for you. Some people choose to get married in the US, others choose to get married in the foreign country (that is what I personally did) and some people get married in a 3rd country that neither are from. People who get married in the US most often get the fiance visa, though some get married and then return to the non USC home country. Those that get married first, some file at the foreign embassy. This is not available everywhere however so you need to check on the options for the embassy you will go through. Others file here in the United States. I would really recommend looking through the guides and reading some of the posts for the first 5 forums in the forum list and deciding what is best for you. Good luck!

[000OOO000 0]

Everything in life requires work. Its aggravating to do the paper work and expensive but if you want her here it really isn't so bad. You are just overwhelmed with all the info. you've read on here. Setting up a new life in China would be heck of a lot harder than doing the K1. Just submit what they require and you should be fine.

[Miranda&James 8]

People don't get denied just because they forgot to write names on pictures, etc, they simply receive RFE's (or request for evidence) to fix these problems. If they are fixed then that person will get an approval from the USCIS and will be able to proceed onto the NVC and Embassy stage where hopefully a visa will get issued. It is absolutely worth it and if you follow the guides on this site you have greatly helped your chances at a less stressful and hopefully easier approval. I used the guides on this site to avoid making common mistakes and we got our visa without any issue. Our case was uncomplicated though and some people do have cases that are more difficult and may require an attorney but for most the process is far from impossible and while sometimes very stressful is absolutely worth it in the end!

[senyorita80 1]

One question. Do you love her really? If you answer yes, then it is indeed worth it. You should be willing to face this long and seem-like-no-ending process and accept it whole heartedly. This forum is very hepful. Just get as much information as you can, file honestly - do not tell lies in your application forms and wait patiently and it will be a success.

[Satellite 1]

Is all the hassle worth it?

No it's not, just break up and find lover in your home town. Much easier in my opinion. What kind of response are you looking for? In my situation it was worth it. In yours? How should I know? It can be either the first or the second response. Your call.

[Cristy 4]

for me it is

[meauxna 15]

I am wondering my options. After reading the numerous postings on this site, I'm wondering if I can negotiate the many obstacles set by the beauracracy of the U.S. immigration system. So many people have had problems. So many have been denied. No name on back of one photo; DENIED. One consulate differs from another at the whim of the idividual consulate officer. DENIED. The money checks are not labelled; DENIED. Is all this worth it?? It seems like it is a bigger gamble than trying to win the world series of poker.

My true love is in China. I have been there twice. We are madly in love. I would love to bring her to the United States. But, the nighmare of the immigration policies, seems overwhelming. I do not want to raise her hopes, only to be denied.I'm beginning to think it might be MUCH easier, to move to China and marry her there. Live there for a few years and file as husband and wife. Do a direct consular filing. Anyone have any thoughts on this? Is it hard to go this route also?? Can an American live in China with his wife?

Why is it so very easy to come in illegally, (Mexico) and yet so very difficult and risky to do things legally??

Please don't misunderstand me here, I want to do everything legally, and I am angry about our border situation. But, my GOD!! What a huge disconnect.

After reading your postings, including the now deleted one, my conclusion is that you are an ideal candidate for working with an immigration attorney.

Doing it yourself, especially with a difficult country like China, can be very overwhelming and time consuming--like learning a whole new job. It seems to me that you have the resources to hire someone to take the weight of this work off of you and handle the annoying little concerns like name on the back of photo, crossed 'T's and dotted 'I's etc. There is no shame in using an attorney for your case; for some people, it's the only way that makes sense.

I did DCF, but I was already living overseas and was not dealing with an especially difficult situation.

I usually tell someone: marry when and where you wish based on YOUR family's needs/wants, not based on immigration decisions. I'd say the same for you. If it's possible for you to go there, live and marry, that sounds grand to me! You don't even have to qualify to file via DCF; you have the option of filing in the US and living overseas during the wait. Having an attorney/agent in the US watching things for you makes it that much more appealing. I'm already of the opinion that you should at minimum meet with an attorney to discuss your financials.

It's nothing but futile to use the ole Mexican border comparison; sneaking in over the border and entering as a legal immigrant are as different as an apple from a boulder. You just can't compare it.

But Mexico brings up an interesting idea that others have used before. If your GF is willing to live there (and able to get in), that at least puts her closer to the US for visits if you can not leave the US for long periods of time (but you've already been out for a long while, right?). In pursuing that option, bear in mind that the wait for a spousal visa is nearly one year in Mexcio, while fiancees are much quicker.

For China specific info, I recommend the Candle for Love forums. You'll be able to find info on Americans living in China there.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Why is it so very easy to come in illegally, (Mexico)

It's not easy.

As for your question, I'm with Satellite. Dump her and find yourself a local broad.

[Jasman0717 9]

YES ITS WORTH IT !

ditto - Don't do anything illegal

[doodlebugfor_u 0]

Some days are harder than most. It has been almost 7 months since I have seen my fiance. I see others on these forums that have been waiting much longer. This is love. We have to fight for what we want so YES, in the long run this will all be worth it.

[*Robert* 2]

You have gotten some very good replies, and some "tongue-in-cheek" replies, because for all of us here, it is obviously worth it, or we wouldn't be putting ourselves and our loved ones through this whole agonizing process. So the bottom line is... how much do you love her?

As for some of the cases you cited, those are extreme at best, and don't call for an actual denial. There are many more approvals than denials, and if you do it right, then you won't get a denial either.

You might want to go with Meauxna's advice and get someone else to do it for you if your are that worried.

Good Luck.

Edited April 9, 2006 by roi_aggie