Prenups

[Kotenochek 0]

I read some threads here and found out I am not the only one interested in prenups.

So here is my question:anyone of You has done it?and What terms were added by You and Your spause.I am also interested how foreign women are protected here by law.Especially when it comes to the kids?

some will say why prenup when you love and blah blah blah..But hey thats why i am interested in it right now,so we never use it at the end:)

[Satellite 1]

how foreign women are protected here by law.

As you may not know, family law falls completely within the jurisdiction of the states. So to answer you question I need to know what state you are from.

Next, 9 states in the US have community property systems and the rest are common law. Community property states at divorce help those spouses who have acquired property together and divide it equally regardless of who contributed the funds for it and common law states focus on equal distribution with all property before and after marriage being at stake. With a prenup you can choose any system you want and any method of distribution upon divorce.

You mention "foreign woman" as if you already have sights on pleading unconscionability and unenforceability of your prenup if necessary.

Each state has it's procedure on what is needed to make a prenup valid with any woman period. Separate counsel, full understanding, time before marriage, etc.

Likewise, any prenup that encourages divorce, for example you get his house if you divorce, will be void, for violation of public policy.

In terms of federal law you have the violence against women act, where you can maintain your immigration status if your man abuses you but does nothing in terms of property rights except make the man look bad in court when it comes to property distribution.

[Kotenochek 0]

Ok:)First of All we live in California:)I hope our marriage lasts forever and the last thing i want is devorce.Its just I guess something that protects both of us not just me or him:)

I am curious more into kids.Like lets say people have kids and something happens and they devorce how kids are saparated here or how it works?

[Turboguy 6]

Ok:)First of All we live in California:)I hope our marriage lasts forever and the last thing i want is devorce.Its just I guess something that protects both of us not just me or him:)

I am curious more into kids.Like lets say people have kids and something happens and they devorce how kids are saparated here or how it works?

Most courts favor the woman when it comes to children and most make sure the father provides for the children until they are grown. Sometimes they will award joint custody but the women always has rights. A prenup can not affect that in any way.

We are planning to do a prenup but until I have some visits with the lawyer I can't say for sure what the details will be. I do intend for it to be a fair prenup that protects us both. We both want it. She wants to feel secure that she will not end up in the streets pennyless and jobless and I have a business that both my kids work in and want to make sure it is protected.

For someone wanting to learn about a prenup there is a very excellent book called "write your own prenup" that is available on Amazon. I am not suggesting writing your own but reading it will give you a much better idea of the ins and outs and where the pitfals are. Reading it will likely have you better informed than the attorney that writes it for you.

[Satellite 1]

I am curious more into kids. Like lets say people have kids and something happens and they divorce how kids are separated here or how it works?

First of all your prenup means almost nothing when it comes to kids. Judges always use the best interest of a child standard. Turboguy is right, that custody usually get awarded to the mom, unless she can be shown to be unfit. But your prenup can only serve as a guide to a judge who may or may not adopt it in his final decree.

For the best advice, take an hour consultation with an attorney here in California.

[Kotenochek 0]

Thanks for info.In russia you can not mention anything rather than material in prenups.I heard here you can so that what i was interested in.But did I get it right turboguy?If we have no prenup we share all at half?

[Turboguy 6]

Thanks for info.In russia you can not mention anything rather than material in prenups.I heard here you can so that what i was interested in.But did I get it right turboguy?If we have no prenup we share all at half?

I am not sure the courts would look hard at a prenup signed in Russia. One other thing that did pop into my mind as advice for the guys is that you should discuss it before she comes here. If she wanted to try to break the prenup and the discussions started here with no confirmation of anything she could claim that it was signed under duress. For example that she was told sign it or go back to Russia.

I know more about the laws of Pennsylvania than I do other states. California as I understand it is a common law state and the minute you are married she owns half of what you have. In Pennsylvania they go by the gain in value during the marriage. If you owned a house worth 200,000 when you got married and had $ 50,000 in the bank and you got divorced and the house was now worth 300,000 and you had $ 100,000 in the bank she would be entitled to half the 100,000 gain in the house and half the $ 50,000 increase in the bank account. You can do things to make it more difficult. For example right now I own three houses worth maybe 250,000 between them. My plan is to sell all three over the next year or two and buy one new house worth maybe $ 300,000 - $ 350,000. I also plan to put that house in both names so I could well give up my equity in the three houses I have now by doing that.

Most people get married with the idea of being best friends and lovers. Sometimes they split up with the hopes of staying friends. Divorce will often turn them into bitter enemies. To me that is another advantage of a pre-nup. It could cut that last phase out. It is the arguing over who gets what that makes them enemies.

[Nancy2015 2]

Prenups are for the rich people, not for us, paupers

[Satellite 1]

If we have no prenup we share all at half?

In California you will share half of what is earned during the marriage. That means any salary you guys get and anything you do with it will be split in half. However, if he already had property before the marriage or received a gift, inheritance, or devise, you would get none of it!

I know more about the laws of Pennsylvania than I do other states. California as I understand it is a common law state and the minute you are married she owns half of what you have. In Pennsylvania they go by the gain in value during the marriage. If you owned a house worth 200,000 when you got married and had $ 50,000 in the bank and you got divorced and the house was now worth 300,000 and you had $ 100,000 in the bank she would be entitled to half the 100,000 gain in the house and half the $ 50,000 increase in the bank account.

AHH! You are confusing folks on here.

California is a COMMUNITY PROPERTY STATE. And Pennsylvania is common law. I don't think in either state the minute you get married the lady gets half. Certainly not in California. In a common law state, they do equitable distribution of all the property at the end of the marriage. They look at bunch of factors including length of marriage, kids, who needs it more, abuse, lifestyle, etc.

In California if nothing was earned during the marriage nothing will be divided.

In California based on the situation you described, if your separate property house was already paid for and it increased in market value the spouse gets nothing if that house was acquired prior to marriage. However, if you made principal payments during marriage, then that part is community property. And any market value increase during marriage for the amount not paid off yet will also go into community property.

As for the bank account, if it is just a savings account and you added money, anything you added from salary during the marriage will be community property and subject to even distribution. If the account consisted entirely of the funds you prior to marriage increased in value due to interest or other market mechanism, the spouse will again get nothing in California, unlike Pennsylvania.

Therefore, if the marriage ends quickly you are going to get almost nothing in California, so the prenup will be needed to make sure the lady at least gets a plane ticket back to Russia.

[Turboguy 6]

Thanks for clarifying that Satelite. I never paid much attention to how the community property states worked it since it was not applicable to me. Actually it almost sounds like a better deal than what we have.

[slim 1,525]

Prenups are for the rich people, not for us, paupers

On board as well!

[Kazan' Tiger 1]

Prenuptial agreements go against everything marriage stands for. If you worry so much about what might happen, stay single and unattached. Then what's yours will always be yours. Marriage is about two lives joining in EVERY way without exclusion.

[Turboguy 6]

Prenuptial agreements go against everything marriage stands for. If you worry so much about what might happen, stay single and unattached. Then what's yours will always be yours. Marriage is about two lives joining in EVERY way without exclusion.

Jeffrey, You post makes me wonder if you have ever gone through a divorce? Marriages that don't have the idea of joining two lives forever are not common yet half the marriages end up in divorce. People who get divorced and have nothing usually can stay best of friends but where there is a lot to loose and situations like a family business a man would be a fool to get married without one. From the woman's standpoint she is giving up more than we do to get married. It is only wise of her to want the protection of knowing she will not find herself on the street with no family, no friends and no job and no money. A good prenup is good for both. A bad prenup is not worth the paper it is written on. Did you ever know any divorce lawyers who were poor, drove an old car and live in a shanty. They are the ones with most to gain if there is no prenup. I will agree if someone is starting out in life and has few assets then a prenup is not needed.

[Satellite 1]

Prenuptial agreements go against everything marriage stands for.

Usually people say that about same sex marriage, but hey, if you think prenups are at the same level, it's full employment for family lawyers

If you worry so much about what might happen, stay single and unattached. Then what's yours will always be yours.

I disagree. In several states there are common law marriages. If you held yourself out as a couple, guess what, even if you were never married, one of the "spouses" can sue for divorce. Next, in California where common law marriages are not recognized, in a case of Marvin v. Marvin, a court has held that a cohabitating partner can sue in contract for services rendered and restitution.

So this plan won't work out in every case either.

Marriage is about two lives joining in EVERY way without exclusion.

We tried this once. Here is a quick summary. Women were men's property. They had no separate identity. They could not sue or be sued. All of the woman's property automatically became the man's upon marriage, etc.

[bruc 0]

Interesting Poll on Prenups..

What people think of prenups

A 2006 Poll demonstrates the polarized opinions on drafting a prenuptial agreement:

• More than one-fourth of respondents (28%) think that a prenup makes smart financial sense for anyone getting married.

• One-fourth think they are for the rich and famous, not regular people.

• One in five (19%) believe a prenup is never needed if two people really love each other.

• Fifteen percent think a prenup dooms a marriage to failure.

• Twelve percent think prenuptial agreements are a good idea but would feel too uncomfortable to bring the issue up in their own relationship.

• One-half (49%) of divorced Americans believe that prenuptial agreements make financial sense, while just one in five (21%) married Americans feel the same.

bruc