Friends and Family Who Drop By Unannounced

[one...two...tree 2,762]

DEAR ABBY: I am 28, single, and have no kids. I don't want any. I love the freedom of picking up and doing what I want when I want, and I wouldn't trade that for anything. I come from a large family and have many nieces and nephews. I love them all, and some of my friends have children that I adore, too.

The problem is, I don't want them coming to my house unannounced. Many of these kids are small, and I have many breakables around my home. When I'm planning on having "little visitors," I take special care to put away anything I don't want broken.

I have tried explaining to friends and family that as much as I'd love for them to visit with the kids, please give me 30 minutes' notice at least, so I can child-proof my home. Many of them have taken this badly, assuming that I don't want their kids and, by extension, them in my home. How do I make it clearer? -- MYRA IN MISSOULA

[L_n_O 3]

fill in your peep-hole in the door so you can't see who is at it and then they have to call to let you know ahead of time who's at the door.

[Jasman0717 9]

We don't answer the door so let them drop by all they want

[Sister Fracas 5]

fill in your peep-hole in the door so you can't see who is at it and then they have to call to let you know ahead of time who's at the door.

definitely covering a peep-hole is a great idea, except if the stereo is blasting.. LOL

In my opinion people shouldn't just stop by, regardless if kiddies are in tow or not. It's just polite to give the person you are visiting notice that you'd like to stop by. You never know when it might be a bad time, and you can avoid an awkwardness. Besides, the fact that you might go all the way to someone's house and then they aren't home.....or they are covering the peep-hole, and you've made a trip for nothing.

We don't answer the door so let them drop by all they want

I dont' either, especially when I'm home alone.

Edited August 28, 2007 by Frances

[*JG* 2]

My family and friends KNOW BETTER then to drop by unannounced. Just like if someone calls after 9 p.m. or before 9 a.m., it better be cause someone is dying!!!!

[SteveLaura 0]

Dear Myra,

Considering that you are 28, single and do not want kids, I can see that what you are actually saying that you are a lesbian. Your 'breakables', of course, refer to the Sapphic paraphenalia you use during your erotic encounters with anonymous female partners. Obviously you need time in advance to dispose of such items from small, prying eyes, especially the love-swing I assume you have in your living room and the strap-ons on the washing machine. I think you should be honest to yourself and your family and disclose to them that you like to munch the carpet occasionally. You'll be surprised how well they take this, and will give you all the time in the world to clear your house of the filth you have purchased online and in dark stores just off the freeway. You will also, as a bonus, not be expected to go on a date with that nice cousin Dirk who owns his own trailer and has a collection of NASCAR bobbleheads.

Regards, Abby.

[almaty 19]

if someone comes by unannounced, then i have no problem ignoring them

[JODO 2]

My family and friends KNOW BETTER then to drop by unannounced. Just like if someone calls after 1 a.m., it better be cause someone is dying!!!!

[AnaAndDaniel 0]

answer the door a la fresco. that will be the last time the swing by unanounced.

Daniel

:energetic:

[Nessa 23]

Dear Myra,

Considering that you are 28, single and do not want kids, I can see that what you are actually saying that you are a lesbian. Your 'breakables', of course, refer to the Sapphic paraphenalia you use during your erotic encounters with anonymous female partners. Obviously you need time in advance to dispose of such items from small, prying eyes, especially the love-swing I assume you have in your living room and the strap-ons on the washing machine. I think you should be honest to yourself and your family and disclose to them that you like to munch the carpet occasionally. You'll be surprised how well they take this, and will give you all the time in the world to clear your house of the filth you have purchased online and in dark stores just off the freeway. You will also, as a bonus, not be expected to go on a date with that nice cousin Dirk who owns his own trailer and has a collection of NASCAR bobbleheads.

Regards, Abby.

[almaty 19]

answer the door a la fresco. that will be the last time the swing by unanounced.

Daniel

:energetic:

good point...better, if you are carrying the dog

[Ban Hammer 13,345]

find wire to doorbell. cut it.

[almaty 19]

the hoosiers will just knock

[Imua 0]

We don't answer the door so let them drop by all they want

Ditto... I'm in NYC and there've been too many stories about fake 'service workers' who get into a woman's apartment and commit horrible crimes - remember that Bronstein guy a couple of years ago, set a fire in the hallway and posed as a fireman just so he could get into a particular former co-worker's apt where he sedated and raped her for hours....

All my family and friends know to email/IM/ call first, unless I'm expecting a delivery I don't answer the door...and I keep a nicely sharpened Kukri in my foyer just in case...

New Yorkers? Paranoid? Naaahhhh....

[Jasman0717 9]

if someone comes by unannounced, then i have no problem ignoring them

Me too brother Dean