Fiance Disapeared !!

[Logres 0]

Is everything answered for you now?

[Caladan 19]

Is your fiancee's son in the U.S.? Or was it the son of the elderly friend? What was confusing is that you said your fiancee was from Brazil, that you called a mutual elderly friend in Brazil, and her son said she was on a bus to Texas and then the elderly friend flew to Arizona?

And somewhere in here you think there is a boyfriend... that she met in Brazil and is with in Arizona? (How did he get here?) That she met in the 10 days she was in here?

See, this is why I just gave immigration-related advice, because trying to find 'red flags' to help other people is hard when the story is sort of tangled.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

I tried to keep my OP relatively short. I did not want to post a novel about my last year and a half.

So what have you learned from the experience?

[jonkam 0]

I had legit questions. And people have been very helpful. I do not want to scare anyone with a horror story and the like. We all know that i am not the first to experience a situation like this. i wish now that I had been a little more wary. I think many of us, before we started the journey, looked for stories like this. I certainly did. I think experiences like mine and others can only serve to educate future applicants. I hope no one starts to treat their SO's with a "guilty until proven innocent" attitude.

In what way?

I think that it shows that not all people are sincere and that there are people who would do this to gain entry into the U.S. I think now, that it is a little naive to go into a relationship and not think about the possibility of something like this happening. i went in thinking that there was a possibility that this could happen. But, I soon said, "Not me" and No "not her". Just maybe, if i took off the blinders, I could have avoided the situation. I am not here to preach to anyone and hope everyone has a successful relationship.

[jonkam 0]

I tried to keep my OP relatively short. I did not want to post a novel about my last year and a half.

So what have you learned from the experience?

Don't be such a trusting person. Easier said than done. Its hard to teach old dogs new tricks. (well I'm not that old)

[one...two...tree 2,762]

I had legit questions. And people have been very helpful. I do not want to scare anyone with a horror story and the like. We all know that i am not the first to experience a situation like this. i wish now that I had been a little more wary. I think many of us, before we started the journey, looked for stories like this. I certainly did. I think experiences like mine and others can only serve to educate future applicants. I hope no one starts to treat their SO's with a "guilty until proven innocent" attitude.

In what way?

I think that it shows that not all people are sincere and that there are people who would do this to gain entry into the U.S. I think now, that it is a little naive to go into a relationship and not think about the possibility of something like this happening. i went in thinking that there was a possibility that this could happen. But, I soon said, "Not me" and No "not her". Just maybe, if i took off the blinders, I could have avoided the situation. I am not here to preach to anyone and hope everyone has a successful relationship.

You didn't know that before?

I tried to keep my OP relatively short. I did not want to post a novel about my last year and a half.

So what have you learned from the experience?

Don't be such a trusting person. Easier said than done. Its hard to teach old dogs new tricks. (well I'm not that old)

How would you have handled the relationship differently?

[archie07 0]

In the 7 months you were apart was there any lapse in communication for say a week or two? She did change her bedside manner. Then living out of the suitcase till you went back to work. She or whoever is in this with her can afford the traveling expenses. IMO it sounds as if this was planned. Maybe after the smoke clears she will contact you and explain. In the meantime, I know your nerves and emotions are upside down so try to eat and take care of your health. Archie

[jonkam 0]

Is your fiancee's son in the U.S.? Or was it the son of the elderly friend? What was confusing is that you said your fiancee was from Brazil, that you called a mutual elderly friend in Brazil, and her son said she was on a bus to Texas and then the elderly friend flew to Arizona?

And somewhere in here you think there is a boyfriend... that she met in Brazil and is with in Arizona? (How did he get here?) That she met in the 10 days she was in here?

See, this is why I just gave immigration-related advice, because trying to find 'red flags' to help other people is hard when the story is sort of tangled.

Did anyone else come to the same conclusions from my posts.

The "son" was the son of an elderly couple she knows.

She met them many years ago IN Brasil. The lady who I talked to, her husband had cancer. ( In fact he just died the day prior to me calling, so I felt a little bad giving the lady the third degree)

The couple were in Brasil because he had cancer. And near her city, there is a supposed spiritual healer, Jao or John of God. I forget the exact details of how they originally met. Several times a year, the elderly couple would come to Brasil for "healing sessions" for the husband. When they did, they(my SO and the elderly couple) would get together. In the past, this elderly couple offered for her to come visit. They even offered her to go to school in the U.S. and they would pay for everything. They met years before I met her. So when i filed the paperwork, for the VISA. I think it was the 156. They ask about prior VISA applications/denials. She had 2. A tourist and a student. Both denied. These were from the time the couple had offered for her to stay with them.

I don't think I said the elderly lady was a "mutual" friend. I never met her, and only talked to her that one time on the phone.

Next Part:

I talked to the son the first time I called and asked to speak to the elderly lady(Sarah) She was unavailable at the time. So I asked him a few questions. That is when I found out that she went there for a day. He said that he had driven her to a bus station. He said, that my SO said, she was headed for Texas.

I don't recall saying that the elderly lady flew to Arizona. My SO flew to Arizona.

I called back a couple of hours later and talked with Sarah( the old lady). sarah said that she(my SO) was worried about her mother because she was ill and was headed back to Brasil. I confronted her about what Thomas (the son) had told me about Texas. She said Thomas was mistaken.

Then I called Brasil, her brother said she was still with Sarah. in Arizona.

There could be a different man in her life. i don't want to restate how I came to this conclusion.

As far as where she met a different guy, maybe on the internet. If there was a guy, I doubt that it was someone (Brasilian) from back home.

MAYBE she met some guy, a U.S. citizen, on the internet. This guy flew up and she liked him more than me. And MAYBE, they decided that they would string me along to get the VISA, so they would not have to wait as long to be together again. And MAYBE they did not realize that down the road they would be screwed because I was the one who got the VISA. ( this is all purely speculation)

Not sure where you came up with, she met a guy in the 10 days she was here.

The elderly lady lives in Arizona. Where she(my SO) is now, I have no idea.

hope this is more clear.

[pushbrk 12,883]

i think her living out of her suitcase for 10 days and not unpacking was a sure red flag. what fiance doesn't unpack and start staking her claim on closet and dresser space.

It sounds like she planned this the whole time. i would contact USCIS and cancel the K1 for sure. at least you found out before you married her. i know it still hurts. dont let any shame on this get you with yoru friends or family. You didnt do anything wrong. She will face her consequences. too bad you cant sue her to recoup your costs in the visa etc.

Chris

The OP has been given the options currently available. "Cancelling the K1 visa." is not one of them. Her visa has been used, so is of no use now. Her I-94 is good for 90 days. If she doesn't marry him during those 90 days, her I-94 expires and she begins an overstay status. He has no control over any of this. His last control point would have been before the visa was in her passport and hand. Once in her hand, she could have flown here and never seen him, had she chosen to do so. (Perhaps because he bought the ticket and knew her itinerary.)

For another 80 days, he has no recourse with any immigration authority. Then he can notify USCIS that the marriage did not occur and any other information he has.

It's a regrettable circumstance made even worse because there IS no recourse at this time and little if any later.

[jonkam 0]

i think her living out of her suitcase for 10 days and not unpacking was a sure red flag. what fiance doesn't unpack and start staking her claim on closet and dresser space.

It sounds like she planned this the whole time. i would contact USCIS and cancel the K1 for sure. at least you found out before you married her. i know it still hurts. dont let any shame on this get you with yoru friends or family. You didnt do anything wrong. She will face her consequences. too bad you cant sue her to recoup your costs in the visa etc.

Chris

She did put a few things away, and they are actually still here. It did strike me as rather odd. It did cross my mind at the time, but I thought maybe she still feels a little strange taking over in someone elses house. Also, we were out a lot and when we were home we were always in each others arms. I am thinking that she did have this whole thing planned prior to coming here. if it was, why would she even bother to come here then leave. She has done things in the past that seemed illogical. i think we all do at times. I have no idea what was in her head. that is the most difficult part.

[archie07 0]

i think her living out of her suitcase for 10 days and not unpacking was a sure red flag. what fiance doesn't unpack and start staking her claim on closet and dresser space.

It sounds like she planned this the whole time. i would contact USCIS and cancel the K1 for sure. at least you found out before you married her. i know it still hurts. dont let any shame on this get you with yoru friends or family. You didnt do anything wrong. She will face her consequences. too bad you cant sue her to recoup your costs in the visa etc.

Chris

She did put a few things away, and they are actually still here. It did strike me as rather odd. It did cross my mind at the time, but I thought maybe she still feels a little strange taking over in someone elses house. Also, we were out a lot and when we were home we were always in each others arms. I am thinking that she did have this whole thing planned prior to coming here. if it was, why would she even bother to come here then leave. She has done things in the past that seemed illogical. i think we all do at times. I have no idea what was in her head. that is the most difficult part.

As someone else stated, you had her itinery and paid her ticket. Where else could she have gone. Now that you mentioned 2 visa denials, there may not be any other man involved. She may have wanted to stay with her friends and go to school. None of us really know till she makes contact with you.

[jonkam 0]

In the 7 months you were apart was there any lapse in communication for say a week or two? She did change her bedside manner. Then living out of the suitcase till you went back to work. She or whoever is in this with her can afford the traveling expenses. IMO it sounds as if this was planned. Maybe after the smoke clears she will contact you and explain. In the meantime, I know your nerves and emotions are upside down so try to eat and take care of your health. Archie

Communication was the normal. e-mail several times a week. I would call once a week, and we would talk for a couple of hours. Her sister lives in a different city, about an hour away. and once in awhile she said she would visit for a day or two.

One thing that was odd and really pissed me off was. She flew to RIO with her mom, on my dime, and went to the interview. I took off from work that day and was expecting an e-mail. Nothing for two days. I was at first worried. She did not come home the day after the interview as planned, she said the flight was cancelled and the next one was a couple of days later. She also said she had something wrong with her eyes and had to go to the hospital and that is why she did not e-mail. I was so pissed. And red-flags started to fly. She acted like everything was normal and reasured me that everything was okay. As is my nature, i calmed down and looked for the positive. A couple of weeks later she was here.

[jonkam 0]

i think her living out of her suitcase for 10 days and not unpacking was a sure red flag. what fiance doesn't unpack and start staking her claim on closet and dresser space.

It sounds like she planned this the whole time. i would contact USCIS and cancel the K1 for sure. at least you found out before you married her. i know it still hurts. dont let any shame on this get you with yoru friends or family. You didnt do anything wrong. She will face her consequences. too bad you cant sue her to recoup your costs in the visa etc.

Chris

She did put a few things away, and they are actually still here. It did strike me as rather odd. It did cross my mind at the time, but I thought maybe she still feels a little strange taking over in someone elses house. Also, we were out a lot and when we were home we were always in each others arms. I am thinking that she did have this whole thing planned prior to coming here. if it was, why would she even bother to come here then leave. She has done things in the past that seemed illogical. i think we all do at times. I have no idea what was in her head. that is the most difficult part.

As someone else stated, you had her itinery and paid her ticket. Where else could she have gone. Now that you mentioned 2 visa denials, there may not be any other man involved. She may have wanted to stay with her friends and go to school. None of us really know till she makes contact with you.

I have thought about this, her wanting to go to school. I even offered this option to her before. she told me that she just wanted to be a housewife and have a couple of kids. I am not sure if she could attend school now that she would be illegally here. Anyone know?

[MKCT 0]

i think her living out of her suitcase for 10 days and not unpacking was a sure red flag. what fiance doesn't unpack and start staking her claim on closet and dresser space.

It sounds like she planned this the whole time. i would contact USCIS and cancel the K1 for sure. at least you found out before you married her. i know it still hurts. dont let any shame on this get you with yoru friends or family. You didnt do anything wrong. She will face her consequences. too bad you cant sue her to recoup your costs in the visa etc.

Chris

She did put a few things away, and they are actually still here. It did strike me as rather odd. It did cross my mind at the time, but I thought maybe she still feels a little strange taking over in someone elses house. Also, we were out a lot and when we were home we were always in each others arms. I am thinking that she did have this whole thing planned prior to coming here. if it was, why would she even bother to come here then leave. She has done things in the past that seemed illogical. i think we all do at times. I have no idea what was in her head. that is the most difficult part.

This is a tought situation, like somebody else said, 10 days in a life time is nothing. First of all, what if she comes back? But what kind of excuse will she have to run away? Second of all, how will she met someone on line or even during the 10 days you were there and change her life out of the sudden, you gotta be pretty immature to do that and finally, what if she knows someone from Brazil, like some illegal man, who is living in the US? I think somebody mention that but still doesn't make sense at all. I'm sorry but you gotta be a piece of.......to do that or an ignorant. I am really mad to read this because I just don't understand how come people like this can exist.

In reply to another comments, I don't see the reason why you will be wasting your time making this up.

And last but not least, I'm not going to say that all brazilian girls are like this but my fiance used to dated a brazilian illegal girl for a couple years who had a son, they broke up many months before we started dating but this girl got him in a LOT of trouble, I was even scared of this girl because I was told by him she was a violent ignorant psycho person and the first month we started dating (I realized he was right), the ####### (because that's what she is, a cheater) made our lives like hell because he was the one who dumped her because she found out the kind of person she really was, she didn't even want to pay back the money he took from my fiance. Anyways, that was on 2005. On 2006 I was living with my fiance and we found out she married somebody my fiance knows not only that, she only married this guy for legal status but this guy doesn't even know. Like I said once, some people can be very fake just to get what they want.

What I don't understand is how the hell she went to the airport from where you guys were living? How did she manage to get her tickets? Does she speaks perfect english? And if she just got cold feet, haven't you guys been dating enough to trust on each other to speak your mind and how you feel?

There is something that doesn't make sense here but before taking any decisions I would speak to her and like somebody said, ask her, what are her plans are or what was she trying to do but if you do get in touch with her and want to take her back, she will have to explain with details this situation and then you must think hard and see if it is worth it.

I don't know if somehow I helped you but I just can't understand these people's behaviour.

--MIRLA.

[MKCT 0]

i think her living out of her suitcase for 10 days and not unpacking was a sure red flag. what fiance doesn't unpack and start staking her claim on closet and dresser space.

It sounds like she planned this the whole time. i would contact USCIS and cancel the K1 for sure. at least you found out before you married her. i know it still hurts. dont let any shame on this get you with yoru friends or family. You didnt do anything wrong. She will face her consequences. too bad you cant sue her to recoup your costs in the visa etc.

Chris

She did put a few things away, and they are actually still here. It did strike me as rather odd. It did cross my mind at the time, but I thought maybe she still feels a little strange taking over in someone elses house. Also, we were out a lot and when we were home we were always in each others arms. I am thinking that she did have this whole thing planned prior to coming here. if it was, why would she even bother to come here then leave. She has done things in the past that seemed illogical. i think we all do at times. I have no idea what was in her head. that is the most difficult part.

As someone else stated, you had her itinery and paid her ticket. Where else could she have gone. Now that you mentioned 2 visa denials, there may not be any other man involved. She may have wanted to stay with her friends and go to school. None of us really know till she makes contact with you.

I have thought about this, her wanting to go to school. I even offered this option to her before. she told me that she just wanted to be a housewife and have a couple of kids. I am not sure if she could attend school now that she would be illegally here. Anyone know?

There's no way she can attend to school without a student visa or a resident status. With a student visa, they request to take an English exam TOEFL before enrolling school. This exam is not given every month and you have to pay months before the exam and study, it is kinda hard. Second, even if she will have a student visa, prices for foreign students are double and even a little bit more, even in a public college and like you mentioned before she doesn't have the money not even the visa.

--MIRLA.