Too Old For Me To Worry?

[almaty 19]

it is a cultural thing sister luz, do what you and your son think is right...if your son starts getting joked on by the other kids, he ask you to wait inside...

[PaulineA 1]

Ive been taking care of Robin (ever since,IMO mother should) but Gary said he is old enough to do things for himself.I wake up at 5:00 to take care what he needs(breakfast and all).Since I take my walk or jogging in the morning I go and wait for the schoolbus with him.and Gary said that no mommy do that to their teenage kids.He said that kids here work and drive and know how to take care themselves.Also I notice that people here ( those I see and know) don't use umbrella even its raining,my friend fiance told her not to worry to get wet because rain here is no big deal for them and I hear that from Gary also.He told me that I'm not gonna melt and boys and men here don't carry umbrella. Ive been bugging Gary to buy me one and I get succeed (at last!! ) yesterday yay! ,its been raining this fast few days and Im worry about Rob.(here I go again), school bus stop is 2 blocks away from where we liveso if its rain he get wet before he get to bus and school.

Am I exaggerated mom or a worry old fart here?

I would rather wear a hood than carry an ubrella. I think you should ask your son how he feels about the situation since he's of an age where he can tell you. Good luck.

[Sinergy 3]

Luz you are a good mom. And if you want to make Robin breakfast in the morning and stand with him at the bus stop then by all means dont let anyone tell you otherwise, do what you want. hes your son, and if you feel you want to do those things and robin isnt complaining about it, then keep doing it. 16 or not, hes still your son and your just taking care of him. Its normal to take care of our kids, no matter how old they are.

[almaty 19]

real men carry umbrellas...

[Sinergy 3]

real men carry umbrellas...

and stand at bus stops with their mommys

GO ROBIN GO....keep your mom happy and worry free!!!

[raymaga 25]

If Robin is anything like my 3 kids, then an umbrella would have a life-expectancy of about....... 1 day!!!!! They either had jackets with hoods, or they just got a little wet walking to and from school. We lived on the west coast of British Columbia (Canada) and got lots of rainy days, so we didn't think anything of getting a little wet from time to time.

I think 16 is a little old to get walked to the bus stop, but I think that is Robin's decision to make. I know my kids would not have liked me to wait with them at the bus stop (they didn't take a bus to school, they walked), but that is just the way teenagers are in Canada. They want their independence way sooner than most parents are ready to give it to them.

Robin will probably take some time to get used to the culture in the U.S., and I would just keep in constant communication with him in regards to how he feels about issues such as this one.

As far as getting up at 5:00 a.m. with him to make sure he gets a good breakfast, etc., I think that's a normal thing for a mother to do (especially when she's not working and having to get herself ready for work).

[GaryC 7]

I just want to clarify some things here. Luz is the best mom (and wife for that matter) that I have ever had the wonderful luck to have ever encountered. The conversation started because Luz insists upon waiting with Robin at the bus stop. The stop is about 100 yards from our front door. I understand her need to make sure Robin is OK but I also know how kids are. I just want to spare Robin the "moma's boy" comments while he is trying to establish himself in a new school in a new country. We live in a completely safe neighborhood. There is nothing to be afraid of here.

As far as the umbrella goes, well, it's a man thing.

[no name 1]

I just want to clarify some things here. Luz is the best mom (and wife for that matter) that I have ever had the wonderful luck to have ever encountered. The conversation started because Luz insists upon waiting with Robin at the bus stop. The stop is about 100 yards from our front door. I understand her need to make sure Robin is OK but I also know how kids are. I just want to spare Robin the "moma's boy" comments while he is trying to establish himself in a new school in a new country. We live in a completely safe neighborhood. There is nothing to be afraid of here.

As far as the umbrella goes, well, it's a man thing.

'Real men' carry umbrellas in NYC, London & Cincinnati. I don't know what you are on about.

[boo boo 1]

Luz

You just have those maternal instincts and you have a very loving bond for your son....he will always be your baby. I think waiting for the bus w/ Robin is fine...for the first week or 2...just to make sure he is comfortable w/ his surroundings...hopefully he can make some friends and you can be more at peace. As a mother...when it is raining outside...noone wants to send their children out in the rain....I can understand that one ) You are a mother and will always want the best for your son...child's happiness=mother's happiness.

[garya505 2]

And, as far as the no umbrella thing......I think only idiots get all wet rather then carry an umbrella.

So I've seen many idiots then.. is that right?

We have a lot of idiots here in the US, didn't Gary tell you that?

[churipu 4]

Do what you feel is right as a mom...teenagers can be very blunt and if Robin was bothered by you waiting outside with him he'd straight up tell you I'm sure! As someone else pointed out, talk to him about it and see what he has to say.

About the umbrella thing...carrying one or not in no way defines whether you're a real person or not IMO...but I honestly think it's really dumb to get wet when there is something that can actually keep you dry...

[Aymerlu 3]

It's natural to worry about your kids no matter their age, but 16 is time to start cutting the cord. If you continue to do things for him, Robin will never know how to do things on his own. My 13 year old doesn't even want me to go to the school with him! And the mall.....well that's just a whole other topic! Kids need to learn how to be independant. As much as you don't want to think about it, we will not always be around to take care of them.

[garya505 2]

Ive been taking care of Robin (ever since,IMO mother should) but Gary said he is old enough to do things for himself.I wake up at 5:00 to take care what he needs(breakfast and all).Since I take my walk or jogging in the morning I go and wait for the schoolbus with him.and Gary said that no mommy do that to their teenage kids.He said that kids here work and drive and know how to take care themselves.Also I notice that people here ( those I see and know) don't use umbrella even its raining,my friend fiance told her not to worry to get wet because rain here is no big deal for them and I hear that from Gary also.He told me that I'm not gonna melt and boys and men here don't carry umbrella. Ive been bugging Gary to buy me one and I get succeed (at last!! ) yesterday yay! ,its been raining this fast few days and Im worry about Rob.(here I go again), school bus stop is 2 blocks away from where we liveso if its rain he get wet before he get to bus and school.

Am I exaggerated mom or a worry old fart here?

Wow, you're such a good mom!

Anyway here's my opinion. I think it's wonderful you take such good care of your son. At age 16, he is old enough to walk to the bus and wait alone, and I'm sorry to say that the other kids will probably tease him if you do it. Also, he is going to be dating soon, and the girls will think he's weird if you wait for the bus with him. (and I remember what Gary told him about girls )

I suggest for a hooded jacket and an umbrella in his bag. Usually teenage guys here don't carry umbrellas, but probably some do, especially in places where you have to walk a lot. We're going to Wisconsin this weekend and we'll take one!

As far as kissing him good bye, well I think it's nice but he could have the same problem with teasing. Maybe you could kiss him goodbye when he goes out the door.

You know, one of the things I liked about the Phils was how the parents took such good care of their children (well most of them, anyway). We could use more of that here. I remember seeing mothers walking their kids to the jeepney, the kids all so clean and looking so nice in their school uniforms.

Anyway, you're a great mom so keep up the good work!

[eau_xplain 2]

Luz, I can understand very well what you are going through as I too was a single mom for a long time. My husband is the first dad my son has known. It is hard for us moms to let go of our babies, especially since we've been so used to taking care of them on our own. But I have realized that I also need to give my husband a chance to be my son's father.

To do that, my husband and I talked about and agreed on several things like ... chores, school, play/game time, family time, etc. These discussions continue as each new situation arises (e.g. new girlfriend, driving, etc). What is important is that my son sees that my husband and I are in agreement when it comes to the rules and expectations that we set. If my husband and I are not in agreement, we don't argue about it in front of my son.

It's not easy. Every now and then I still catch myself making decisions on my own whenever my son asks permission from me. But I am getting better about telling my son that I need to talk to his dad first (especially if it's something that we haven't agreed on yet).

As to Robin, he will probably let you know when he is ready and confident enough to start doing things on his own. My son doesn't mind that my husband stands with him at the bus stop on the rare mornings that he has to take the bus (I usually drive him to school on my way to work). But, he does not want mom to stand outside and wait for the bus with him..

Good luck to you, Gary and Robin as you evolve into a loving and cohesive family.

[Kazan' Tiger 1]

You do FAR more than I would ever! A 16 y/o is 100% capable of getting off to school themselves. From start to finish! He should be preparing YOU breakfast on occasion! REALLY!

As for the umbrella, that is some sort of foolish American thing that young people do. They don't consider warm coats are needed in the winter and umbrellas needed in the rain. Want to get your child to carry one? Lobby for their favourite celebrity to use one, than stand back. All teenagers will have one even if it isn't raining!