How to get married... quickly!

[Nywoek 19]

For those of you who came to the country on a K1 visa, how did you get a wedding together in less than 3 months? We are considering doing a quick and easy one without guests and do a bigger celebration later on, maybe in a country where our friends and family can meet in the "middle", but I would still like to do /something/ once I move over there. From what I have seen, most people plan their wedding for months and months or even years, and while you can think about attire and plan some of the things, anything that involves booking something is out of the question until you have that visa in hand. And by then you dont have that much time anymore. 😕

 

Any experiences are welcomed. 😃

[nastra30 2,449]

1 hour ago, Nywoek said:

For those of you who came to the country on a K1 visa, how did you get a wedding together in less than 3 months? We are considering doing a quick and easy one without guests and do a bigger celebration later on, maybe in a country where our friends and family can meet in the "middle", but I would still like to do /something/ once I move over there. From what I have seen, most people plan their wedding for months and months or even years, and while you can think about attire and plan some of the things, anything that involves booking something is out of the question until you have that visa in hand. And by then you dont have that much time anymore. 😕

 

Any experiences are welcomed. 😃

A few options I can think of, if you want a quick marriage ceremony.

1. Court marriage. May require a couple of witnesses

2. Vegas.....baaaby

3. Utah virtual

 

 

[MalloryCat 398]

court marriage would be the cheapest, easiest, and quickest. would need at least 2 witnesses.

 

we ended up doing a very small ceremony. just hired an officiant to meet us somewhere (can literally be anywhere, we used an empty meeting room at the place i work LOL) was just my family who came, took about 20 minutes. and then we went to dinner afterward.

 

I ordered a dress off Amazon, my husband already had a suit.

 

I used a website called theknot to find an officiant. has everything that one would need for a wedding

if you didn't want to try and plan a ceremony some officiants will literally just meet you somewhere and sign the license for you (and do all the legal stuff as well of course) but still need the 2 witnesses as well.

[yuna628 9,758]

2 hours ago, Nywoek said:

For those of you who came to the country on a K1 visa, how did you get a wedding together in less than 3 months? We are considering doing a quick and easy one without guests and do a bigger celebration later on, maybe in a country where our friends and family can meet in the "middle", but I would still like to do /something/ once I move over there. From what I have seen, most people plan their wedding for months and months or even years, and while you can think about attire and plan some of the things, anything that involves booking something is out of the question until you have that visa in hand. And by then you dont have that much time anymore. 😕

 

Any experiences are welcomed. 😃

 

For us we planned everything in the year or so before he arrived, something I don't recommend doing for most people. Vendors I chose knew our situation and were willing to be okay with that - we put in nothing concrete until visa was in hand. Most states do have venues which can provide elopement ceremonies or small style weddings that can give you an experience without the hassle. I wanted a great deal of control over factors of our wedding instead of handing it off to family members that would likely run things into the ground, but usually it's important to delegate if you can. Don't be afraid to discuss options with venues and vendors, many are understanding. They want the money afterall. I used many websites like theknot and weddingwire to search for vendors that I needed.

 

Still there were problems:

 

1) I had my wedding dress long ago and the hardworking ladies in the back got it looking great in time. The problem was everyone else's outfits had to be ordered. The company claimed they had ordered months ago, but when time came to collect the orders went missing. My MoH's gown ended up having to be the last one on the rack that had damage, but the ladies got it fixed in time.

 

2) Our venue of choice had acknowledged the difficulty in knowing an actual date but worked out a generalized plan that we finalized. I didn't have as much cash for a lavish wedding, but I felt annoyed at times when I was treated as if our wedding was not as important as the rest. The owner was very difficult dealing with at times, and at some point when it came time to sign the contract with a concrete date they went awol. For a good week I was frantic in trying to find potential new venues at short notice. Thankfully they did eventually get in touch and the venue looked just the way we wanted, but by the end of it we were all pretty upset. I'm aware of other couples that had the same experience.

 

3) We had the majority of his family flying in from overseas so that took planning between 15 people or so. The hardest part was booking a hotel which was apparently problematic because of the Pope (no idea but that was the excuse for the severely full hotels and high prices).

 

4) The day of we had one party member that really caused some problems. I ended up being shoved in a big closet at the last minute and my photographer and bridesmaid got me dressed to get me away from the situation. I hadn't a clue what I even looked like!

 

5) The stress was often severe. My husband took care of a lot of things on his side of the pond but there was only so much he could do. By the time he got here and was able to help more he really saw how much of a toll it had taken. There were a few times we wanted to just go elope because of the stress! And I should say there is no shame in that either. People often want the big celebration, but when you think of the money and time, I don't know if we would have done it again. We did get the special day we wanted, even if it wasn't 100% exactly as we had originally wanted.

 

My last piece of advice is everyone always makes a big deal about the dress, but pay attention to what is going on your feet. I had originally wanted combats a friend had painted which my family threw a fit about, and pushed me to get heels which then the bridal company lost. They offered backups. Well they were the absolute worst things - bloody blisters, dye that ran straight off... get what is comfortable for your feet the rest of the noise can shut up about it!

 

My point is a small or medium sized wedding is doable depending on several factors and how much help you have, even at short notice. But I certainly wouldn't recommend it. Most people do a courthouse ceremony.. I've been to one of those and it wasn't for us, but it absolutely works in a pinch.

[SL2024 149]

Courthouse wedding

[Edward and Jaycel 882]

We did ours in our county court officiated by one of the magistrates. The license cost us $35 and the court fee was $100. We had 8 guests and it was a really nice ceremony. The magistrate was thoughtful in his words and made us feel really special. All-in-all the mechanics of getting the appointment for the license and the time scheduled for the ceremony took just a couple of hours of calling and emails. 

[Daphne . 1,964]

54 minutes ago, yuna628 said:

 

For us we planned everything in the year or so before he arrived, something I don't recommend doing for most people. Vendors I chose knew our situation and were willing to be okay with that - we put in nothing concrete until visa was in hand. Most states do have venues which can provide elopement ceremonies or small style weddings that can give you an experience without the hassle. I wanted a great deal of control over factors of our wedding instead of handing it off to family members that would likely run things into the ground, but usually it's important to delegate if you can. Don't be afraid to discuss options with venues and vendors, many are understanding. They want the money afterall. I used many websites like theknot and weddingwire to search for vendors that I needed.

 

Still there were problems:

 

1) I had my wedding dress long ago and the hardworking ladies in the back got it looking great in time. The problem was everyone else's outfits had to be ordered. The company claimed they had ordered months ago, but when time came to collect the orders went missing. My MoH's gown ended up having to be the last one on the rack that had damage, but the ladies got it fixed in time.

 

2) Our venue of choice had acknowledged the difficulty in knowing an actual date but worked out a generalized plan that we finalized. I didn't have as much cash for a lavish wedding, but I felt annoyed at times when I was treated as if our wedding was not as important as the rest. The owner was very difficult dealing with at times, and at some point when it came time to sign the contract with a concrete date they went awol. For a good week I was frantic in trying to find potential new venues at short notice. Thankfully they did eventually get in touch and the venue looked just the way we wanted, but by the end of it we were all pretty upset. I'm aware of other couples that had the same experience.

 

3) We had the majority of his family flying in from overseas so that took planning between 15 people or so. The hardest part was booking a hotel which was apparently problematic because of the Pope (no idea but that was the excuse for the severely full hotels and high prices).

 

4) The day of we had one party member that really caused some problems. I ended up being shoved in a big closet at the last minute and my photographer and bridesmaid got me dressed to get me away from the situation. I hadn't a clue what I even looked like!

 

5) The stress was often severe. My husband took care of a lot of things on his side of the pond but there was only so much he could do. By the time he got here and was able to help more he really saw how much of a toll it had taken. There were a few times we wanted to just go elope because of the stress! And I should say there is no shame in that either. People often want the big celebration, but when you think of the money and time, I don't know if we would have done it again. We did get the special day we wanted, even if it wasn't 100% exactly as we had originally wanted.

 

My last piece of advice is everyone always makes a big deal about the dress, but pay attention to what is going on your feet. I had originally wanted combats a friend had painted which my family threw a fit about, and pushed me to get heels which then the bridal company lost. They offered backups. Well they were the absolute worst things - bloody blisters, dye that ran straight off... get what is comfortable for your feet the rest of the noise can shut up about it!

 

My point is a small or medium sized wedding is doable depending on several factors and how much help you have, even at short notice. But I certainly wouldn't recommend it. Most people do a courthouse ceremony.. I've been to one of those and it wasn't for us, but it absolutely works in a pinch.

Reading this already gave me anxiety! 🤣

 

I got married at our house, a friend married us and we only had my husband’s family as guests. It was -40 F outside, so that was easy in terms of keeping the food frozen until it was time to serve it 👍🏻

 

in hindsight I do regret that we didn’t have a second celebration with my family and friends in my home country, but maybe we can do that when we have our 10 year anniversary. 

[NorthByNorthwest 386]

3 hours ago, Nywoek said:

For those of you who came to the country on a K1 visa, how did you get a wedding together in less than 3 months? We are considering doing a quick and easy one without guests and do a bigger celebration later on, maybe in a country where our friends and family can meet in the "middle", but I would still like to do /something/ once I move over there. From what I have seen, most people plan their wedding for months and months or even years, and while you can think about attire and plan some of the things, anything that involves booking something is out of the question until you have that visa in hand. And by then you dont have that much time anymore. 😕

 

Courthouse wedding with superior court commissioner officiating and two clerks as witnesses. The court staff was only too happy to accommodate since they typically didn't see many nice outcomes in that room.

[Edward and Jaycel 882]

5 minutes ago, NorthByNorthwest said:

The court staff was only too happy to accommodate since they typically didn't see many nice outcomes in that room.

 

Yes we found it the same for ours!  The magistrate's clerk was ear-to-ear grinning the whole time and even said that our ceremony was the highlight of their month (We got married on Oct. 25th) LOL

Edited 8 hours ago by Edward and Jaycel

[KMG 156]

7 hours ago, Nywoek said:

For those of you who came to the country on a K1 visa, how did you get a wedding together in less than 3 months? We are considering doing a quick and easy one without guests and do a bigger celebration later on, maybe in a country where our friends and family can meet in the "middle", but I would still like to do /something/ once I move over there. From what I have seen, most people plan their wedding for months and months or even years, and while you can think about attire and plan some of the things, anything that involves booking something is out of the question until you have that visa in hand. And by then you dont have that much time anymore. 😕

 

Any experiences are welcomed. 😃

Courthouse and then a ceremony.  I got married in Honduras where you are required to do the Courthouse wedding first.  A week later we had a religious ceremony with his family and friends.  The following summer both of us traveled to the US to have a ceremony for my family and friends. and yes I have 3 wedding dresses 😆, You to have to keep it small.  We also did Zoom links for both religious ceremonies.

Edited 5 hours ago by KMG

[Bunninuts 46]

Consider how many people you want to attend first. This will decide your next options. If you want to just have you and your partner or you two and a couple friends/family, your options are limitless. You don't have to have a big space and catering and all that extra planning isn't necessary. In my state you can have an ordained minister marry you. Many can get this and if one of your friends has this, may marry you for free. That means only having to buy the marriage license. For me and my partner, we will likely be married by a friend who is ordained in a forest away from trails and with a beautiful view. I live in the PNW so I am hoping he arrives when we have some good weather. 

I have been told there are eloping businesses that can have a place ready for you and your partner and a few guests to have a ceremony and take pictures. 

Depending on how many people you want to invite, you might be able to reserve a suitable spot with a few months notice. You have 6 months from the time of the medical exam to travel to the United States. That means you could technically try to time things just right to make a reservation after the interview and after a time when it is assured everyone will be in the US. 

Consider what you can plan and take care of now. Decide how many guests and what you can and are willing to pay for like food, venue, photography, etc. Get the attire picked out as that can be done now
Wishing you all the best in your planning and next steps 💜

[Neonred 3,695]

Got married at the beach in our town.  Just my family and our minister.  Following the wedding had a meal at our house for everyone.

[discoverusa 292]

We got married in Hawaii, just the two of us. It was perfect! 

[TBoneTX 46,415]

Mrs. T-B. & I had a courthouse marriage (Justice of the Peace) on Halloween afternoon.

We even had time to get multiple marriage certificates* printed, that day, while we waited on them.

     *you'll need several

We had the big party on Pearl Harbor Day.