Is he ready for marriage?

[Mrs.J06 4]

I have open communication... but i think i am the only one doing the communicating so that does not work.

Regarding Nanusia's comments... I am not thinking about myself.. if i was I would not have asked for help on VJ.. and considering letting him go.. read original post.

and I have tried with his mom... In July I went to visit Germany with my sister and Niece and his mother said she did not want to see my face because it was too soon since what had happened in the US on her visit... Silly me, I understood she didnt want to see my face as saying she did not want me staying in her home... So I suggested we meet with her for coffee and she could meet my family but she said NO to his too.

THerefore, it might be too soon to spend Christmas with her.. know what i mean?

Wow, sounds like she's a piece of work!

It seems as if to him, making a decision about moving to the US means making a decision between you and his mom. Must be hard on him, but he will have to get this straigtened out before he's ready to start life with you. Maybe he needs to spend Christmas with his parents alone and have a serious talk with them about growing up and having his own life.

In my personal experience, all the "family troubles" came up during the Christmas week. Too many family members on too little space for too much time!

[Cassandra+Yuibi 0]

I'm having a similair issue with my fiance. Although he isn't having doubts about coming here- he's very set on it and he's never wavered in his opinion on the issue. Our problem is with his family. They actually do like me- but they are having a very hard time accepting that he will move and some of them are constantly following him around saying things like "You are selfish" and things like that. It's really a kind of psychological warfare. I'm glad that my fiance hasn't given into them- but I can also understand how having those kind of people surrounding you (especially without your partner there to support you) can cause a great deal of grief and confusion.

Like everyone has said- you need to sit down with him and have a talk. If nothing else- point him in the direction of VJ so if he would like to speak with other people who are going through the same thing (because I guarantee you there is no shortage of hopeful immigrants that are going through hell because of their families protesting their decision).