ROC with narcisstic US citizen husband

[Argenta2623 1]

Hello guys, I came to US on marriage based visa on 2022, while living with my husband he has been a drunk abuser. He becoming mean,agressive while he is drunk and very next day when he got sober he blame me for overreacting.I left twice to my original country. He promised me that he would stop drinking when I return he started again. four months ago we jointly filled I751 petition, after that we got into big argument  and brake up we still married but live separately for the last three months. I made a condition, I will only be with him if he will get treatment. On couple therapy he said nothing wrong with him ,the problem on me because I have to learn how to communicate with him properly. He wants to come back as nothing was happening or I have to go back to my country. He threatens me to file a report against me that  I came to US only for benefits and used him for money.He knows i have no family or friends here and my English is not fluent.

I have evidence for financial, emotional  abuse he does not let me use my cards, he withdraw money. The lease office sent me eviction notice, he knows I recently arrived and Im unemployed, he suspended my phone line.

 

I can not decide what would be the best for me, file for divorce and convert to waiver My marriage was entered in good faith, but the marriage was terminated though divorce or annulment,

Or I entered the marriage in good faith,  and during the marriage, I was battered or was the subject of extreme cruelty, by my US citizen spouse?

do I have to file for divorce first then get divorce certificate then  convert the petition ?  

Thank you for any advice

 

[Boiler 45,797]

Refile with a divorce Waiver.

[OldUser 7,037]

2 hours ago, Argenta2623 said:

He promised me that he would stop drinking when I return he started again. four months ago we jointly filled I751 petition

Sorry to hear what you're going through. It wasn't worth filing jointly. You can either convert existing petition to divorce waiver or file a new I-751 with divorce waiver and withdraw old joint petition.

 

It's important to remember these things:

1) Keep yourself safe

2) Make copies of all docs and keep originals and copies safe

3) Make sure abuser doesn't know your passwords for digital accounts and banking

4) Every time you move you're required to file AR-11 within 10 days of moving

5) Divorce ASAP

 

 

Divorce waiver petition is typically an easier route. Battery / abuse requires solid evidence and more proof. You can still describe bad treatment from ex in cover letter for I-751 with divorce waiver.

 

Edited Wednesday at 02:14 AM by OldUser

[Argenta2623 1]

Thank you very much @OldUser I want clerefy for myself. Do I have to submit an explanation to USCIS that we have been separated for 3 months and I’m preparing for divorce.
Or do I have to file for divorce get final marriage divorce decree only then submit all paperwork with explanation? And what if during the divorce proceedings they will approve my joint petition because divorce can take a long time?

[Boiler 45,797]

The last thing you want is for it to be approved based on the current filing.

[OldUser 7,037]

44 minutes ago, Argenta2623 said:

 And what if during the divorce proceedings they will approve my joint petition because divorce can take a long time?

If joint petition approved while you're separated or divorced - you're in trouble... USCIS may accuse you of misrepresentation next time you need an immigration benefit such as citizenship, renewal or petitioning somebody else. And that can lead to losing GC altogether.

 

How long would a divorce take in your state? Did you speak to a divorce attorney about this?

[Ontarkie 14,325]

~~Moved to Effects of Major Family Changes, from ROC - as similar threads are discussed here.~~

[Argenta2623 1]

12 minutes ago, OldUser said:

 

How long would a divorce take in your state? Did you speak to a divorce attorney about this?

From few weeks to several years.

 

Immigration attorney said I don’t know why you worried about it so much, don’t do anything just wait your ten years GC in mailbox.

 

Another immigration attorney told me I have to  send to USCIS explanation letter ASAP that we fall apart and I concern husband will send false statement and discredit my case.Ask USCIS to keep private my case information from him.

 

Family attorney said he doesn’t know anything about immigration law, and he advised file for restraining order against him then file for divorce.

[OldUser 7,037]

1 hour ago, Argenta2623 said:

Family attorney said he doesn’t know anything about immigration law, and he advised file for restraining order against him then file for divorce.

Divorce attorney would know about divorce timeline. I think that's one of the things to ask him about. And not generic from few weeks to few years, but specific to your case and situation. That's where the value is. Generic stuff we can google ourselves. Obviously, he wouldn't know much about immigration.

 

1 hour ago, Argenta2623 said:

Immigration attorney said I don’t know why you worried about it so much, don’t do anything just wait your ten years GC in mailbox.

 

Are you sure it's real attorney? Is he searchable on https://www.ailalawyer.com/? 

 

First time I'm hearing attorney recommending misrepresentation by omission and being chill about it. The worst case the client can get deported...

Edited Wednesday at 06:16 AM by OldUser

[katya2024 0]

Hello . I am unsure of what state you are in . Why are you not filing for VAWA please ? Speak to an information attorney . The divorce can take years it’s ok. As far as you have the proof of the assault and battery . You are good . Unless things have changed . I live in a state  where they do not tolerate that none sense especially with immigrants so we have loads of resources . It will get better don’t worry he is just scaring you . He cannot do anything . Know your resources and your rights . And go for a non profit immigration attorney as they are more beneficial to what you are seeking . Good luck . If you need to know what is VAWA . Let me know 

[Daphne . 1,912]

30 minutes ago, katya2024 said:

Hello . I am unsure of what state you are in . Why are you not filing for VAWA please ? Speak to an information attorney . The divorce can take years it’s ok. As far as you have the proof of the assault and battery . You are good . Unless things have changed . I live in a state  where they do not tolerate that none sense especially with immigrants so we have loads of resources . It will get better don’t worry he is just scaring you . He cannot do anything . Know your resources and your rights . And go for a non profit immigration attorney as they are more beneficial to what you are seeking . Good luck . If you need to know what is VAWA . Let me know 

OP already has a green card and needs to remove the conditions, which they can do on their own with a divorce waiver. 

Edited Wednesday at 07:52 AM by Daphne .

[Argenta2623 1]

10 hours ago, OldUser said:

First time I'm hearing attorney recommending misrepresentation by omission and being chill about it. The worst case the client can get deported...

I found her in non profit organisation for low income people. I agree, USCIS says the removal of conditions must be jointly or self petition in the case of divorce, there is no separate live option. 

[Argenta2623 1]

9 hours ago, katya2024 said:

. If you need to know what is VAWA . Let me know 

 Are you must be talking about I 360 VAWA petition? I have already gone through the process of changing my status and received green card. In this case I’m not eligible for VAWA
 

[Bunninuts 31]

Argenta2623, we may be able to help you further if we know which State you are in. I'm sorry you are experiencing this. Different States have different laws for divorce and what help you can obtain.

[Argenta2623 1]

4 minutes ago, Bunninuts said:

 

Argenta2623, we may be able to help you further if we know which State you are in. I'm sorry you are experiencing this. Different States have different laws for divorce and what help you can obtain.

 

Oregon