Fiance purposely missed K1 Visa interview

[Pumpkinandchai 1]

 

Yes. He will have to have a good answer to the officers since he missed. I suggested he says “missed flight”

His claim is cold feet. I spoke to him afterwards. He has apologized so many times.

He recently started a new eatery business so it could be thats why he skipped out.

But the fact that he didnt tell me beforehand to try and reschedule is really bothering me. 

I thought of that maybe it could be money but over the course of our relationship we have always shared finances. I spend the most of course on flights visiting him but thats about it. 
I just dont understand. 
 

[Bunninuts 19]

2 minutes ago, Pumpkinandchai said:

 

Yes. He will have to have a good answer to the officers since he missed. I suggested he says “missed flight”

His claim is cold feet. I spoke to him afterwards. He has apologized so many times.

He recently started a new eatery business so it could be thats why he skipped out.

But the fact that he didnt tell me beforehand to try and reschedule is really bothering me. 

I thought of that maybe it could be money but over the course of our relationship we have always shared finances. I spend the most of course on flights visiting him but thats about it. 
I just dont understand. 
 

Honesty is the best policy as they can check flights and all of that. They also can tell people who lie as they see it on an every day basis. It is better he is honest when he tries to reschedule, if he reschedules. It wouldn't be unusual for anyone to have cold feet considering marriage, but especially one where they would leave their country, culture, and family behind. I will also throw it out there to be cautious of any money you may be giving him. It isn't my business what you do however if it wasn't something that happened on a regular basis, we wouldn't have to be cautious of this aspect. Knowing how long and expensive this process is, I would be questioning my fiance for the lack of communication and missing the appointment. I would be very suspicious. There are so many people waiting for interviews that him not rescheduling meant a missed spot for some happy couple to have that interview.

 

Sometimes we experience things and want answers and sometimes there just isn't any. Sometimes the most obvious is presented but we don't want to accept it. I wish you all the best and what will make you happiest is the path that will unfold for you.

[yuna628 9,665]

17 minutes ago, Pumpkinandchai said:

 

Yes. He will have to have a good answer to the officers since he missed. I suggested he says “missed flight”

His claim is cold feet. I spoke to him afterwards. He has apologized so many times.

He recently started a new eatery business so it could be thats why he skipped out.

But the fact that he didnt tell me beforehand to try and reschedule is really bothering me. 

I thought of that maybe it could be money but over the course of our relationship we have always shared finances. I spend the most of course on flights visiting him but thats about it. 
I just dont understand. 
 

So you are suggesting he lie to an immigration officer?

 

If you make excuses for him to cover a lie, he will continue his behavior. I do not see this getting any better.

[W199 328]

8 hours ago, Pumpkinandchai said:

Crazycat I agree….I just dont want all my efforts on USA side to go to waste. I am hoping it can be rescheduled.

Huh?  What do you mean? Consider yourself very fortunate, you have saved a huge amount of money, stress, and time compared to getting divorced soon after he arrives, and when he leaves you and requests you support him since you signed the I-134 support agreement.

 

Don't be a gullible American victim.  No one, repeat no one, is going to do what he did to you if they are serious. He would have discussed it with you, request you move the interview date later ..

 

More than likely he is just trying to scam you for more money

Edited September 23 by W199

[Pinkrlion 2,711]

You need to focus on your relationship than trying to reschedule an interview. 

[Boiler 45,322]

This is Lagos.

[Cathi 5,742]

1 hour ago, Pumpkinandchai said:

 

Yes. He will have to have a good answer to the officers since he missed. I suggested he says “missed flight”

His claim is cold feet. I spoke to him afterwards. He has apologized so many times.

He recently started a new eatery business so it could be thats why he skipped out.

But the fact that he didnt tell me beforehand to try and reschedule is really bothering me. 

I thought of that maybe it could be money but over the course of our relationship we have always shared finances. I spend the most of course on flights visiting him but thats about it. 
I just dont understand. 
 

Why are you focusing on everything and everything other than the relationship itself? It's not the money, his business or a million other possible things. IF he wanted to marry you, he would have moved heaven and earth to be there. Period. His excuses are a clear sign that he does not want to marry you. He even told you he had cold feet. What is there not to understand?

BTW, lying to the consulate to say he missed his flight, is misrepresentation. Based on that alone, you can be denied. WHY would you ever lie to a CO???? 

[retheem 564]

11 hours ago, Pumpkinandchai said:

Hello, 

Can I reschedule my K1 visa interview for my fiance or is my case closed?

My fiance purposely ditched out on his K1 Visa interview claiming “cold feet”

He did not notify me or the embassy until after the interview date that he had done so. 
I am so hurt to say the least. But I still want to be with him.

Lol did you say cold feet? A naija man having cold feet? 

[apnzz 217]

7 hours ago, Pumpkinandchai said:

 

Yes. He will have to have a good answer to the officers since he missed. I suggested he says “missed flight”
 

So you've suggested that he lie to officers at the Embassy?

Don't see how that would be a good idea nor good advice given the situation you're already in.

 

Once you lie to them once, if they know you are lying, that will give them all the reason they need to thus question every other answer and piece of information he provides them. 

 

7 hours ago, Pumpkinandchai said:

His claim is cold feet. I spoke to him afterwards. He has apologized so many times.

Why does this even matter? Immigration is no easy, fast or smooth sailing journey, any beneficiary that would INTENTIONALLY do something like this, is questioning the entire process to begin with. You don't just get cold feet and not attend an interview for IMMIGRATION if you aren't questioning the entire relationship to begin with. A person can be nervous and get cold feet - that isn't the same thing as CHOOSING to miss an immigration interview.

 

7 hours ago, Pumpkinandchai said:

I just dont understand. 

Deep down I think you do and you are trying to make excuses for him; it isn't finances, his business, flights, it isn't cold feet - this is at the core, a man who clearly has second thoughts and reservations about the process and about marrying you. 

 

Like others have said, you are focusing on the wrong thing entirely. He can apologise all he wants but his true intentions and feelings toward the relationship are very clear, whether you choose to continue to blindly forgive those things and try to fix his mistakes will only cover things up that will later reveal themselves, and by that point you will be in a more difficult position.

 

Even if you potentially did lie, got away with it, got a new interview, got approved - it isn't magically going to fix the fundamental issues that are very apparent here - it's just sweeping the issues under the rug - metaphorically speaking, and those things ALWAYS resurface. Issues do not go away magically, they have to be addressed and worked through. Better to protect yourself now than be stuck with a foreign dependent in the U.S where you realise the true nature of the relationship but there's nothing you can do because you've signed a document that makes you financially responsible for him and make you stuck in that situation.

 

From your responses it really seems like you are acting like this is a small thing he has done and it is easily forgiven / excused - it isn't. Unfortunately there is nothing anyone can do to help you until you admit that.

 

Wish you nothing but the best, truly. But this man seems like he does not have true intentions of having loving and long marriage/relationship with you.

 

[smilingstone 158]

Are you 100% sure he even had an interview booked in the first place? Did you receive any official notice from the embassy that the interview was missed? Anything other than him just telling you?

 

You mention giving money for flights, have you also given money for other things like fees, or even for this "new eatery business"?

 

I'm asking because it's not unheard of that the non-USC will ask for help with paying for costs associated with the visa process, but they just pocket it and things were never actually booked and/or paid for...

 

To me, it doesn't make much sense why someone would chicken out at literally the final hurdle, unless in reality there actually never was an interview to attend.

[nastra30 2,281]

15 hours ago, nastra30 said:

What does status say here:

https://ceac.state.gov/CEACStatTracker/Status.aspx

 

 

 

👆🏻

[Wagoneer 4]

Hey well,  keep us updated sis.  Good luck to y’all 

[Pumpkinandchai 1]

Hi, I am taking all of this into consideration. Yes he said “cold feet”.

He has never said this to me ever before. Thats why I believe him.

What should we say to the officers then?

You are right. I dont want him to lie. But I still want him to come to USA.
I think am gonna go forward with rescheduling. 

[appleblossom 2,330]

11 minutes ago, Pumpkinandchai said:

Hi, I am taking all of this into consideration. Yes he said “cold feet”.

He has never said this to me ever before. Thats why I believe him.

What should we say to the officers then?

You are right. I dont want him to lie. But I still want him to come to USA.
I think am gonna go forward with rescheduling. 

 

If asked (he may not be) then he tells them the truth. 

 

You've not answered the questions above, did you ever see proof that he had the interview scheduled? What does his online status say?

[SL2024 60]

Usually when there is an overwhelming consensus of opinion on something it is a pretty good idea to listen to what is being said. I don’t think you are considering everything that has been said at all.
 

I think you are hurt by what has happened and I completely understand that but I would strongly encourage you to think about this again.