DIvorce in NYC

[vamphog 24]

Hello,

does anyone know how I can divorce in NYC if I do not know where my soon to be Ex husband is at this time? We do not contact each other since before COvid pandemic. The break up was not good at all, so I really do not want to contact him or reveal my address to him. Or does anyone know any lawyers with reasonable pricing? The case should be easy, since we don’t have any kids or property together. The lawyer I went for consultation to is asking 5K TO START and then possibly more later. I heard that I need to go to CIty clerk and ask for info, but I don’t know where that is, does any of you guys know? I am completely lost right now, but I don’t have that much money to pay for lawyer

[J.M. 230]

I can't give any advice for NY, but for any divorce the petitioner (you or an attorney representing you) must make reasonable efforts to notify the soon to be ex.  "Reasonable efforts" are legally defined... there are steps to go through to attempt to locate.  I see no reason why he would need to know your address.  The simplest and cheapest divorce is when both parties attend and agree on a settlement.

[JeanneAdil 6,494]

to achieve a NY divorce (entire state) u must be legally separated for a year so 1st file for legal separation to get the year's wait started

$5000 is on the high end especially if no property and children 

[vamphog 24]

1 minute ago, JeanneAdil said:

to achieve a NY divorce (entire state) u must be legally separated for a year so 1st file for legal separation to get the year's wait started

$5000 is on the high end especially if no property and children 

I don’t think this is a requirement. We do not live together since  AUgust 2018, the ground for divorce will be “Irretrievable breakdown in relationship for a period of at least 6 months”, and we don’t necessarily need to have a legal separation for that

[Boiler 45,468]

https://ww2.nycourts.gov/divorce/info_faqs.shtml#:~:text=The husband and wife must,use it for a divorce.

[J.M. 230]

2 hours ago, vamphog said:

I don’t think this is a requirement. We do not live together since  AUgust 2018, the ground for divorce will be “Irretrievable breakdown in relationship for a period of at least 6 months”, and we don’t necessarily need to have a legal separation for that

 

You are correct with this.  The 1 year legal separation requirement is only if you are using legal separation as the grounds for the divorce.  About the only way I see for you to economically get divorced is to reach agreement with your spouse to file an uncontested divorce and do it yourself, using guidance and forms from NYCourts.gov.

 

I'm not recommending you do it that way, just pointing out it is possible.  If contacting your spouse is out of the question, you will have no choice but to retain a lawyer.  I agree that a $5,000 retainer seems high, but if they are going to have to locate your spouse and possibly deal with a contested divorce, it is probably not out of line.  Lawhelpny.org is a government sponsored website that might help you find a reduced cost lawyer.

[JeanneAdil 6,494]

15 hours ago, vamphog said:

I don’t think this is a requirement. We do not live together since  AUgust 2018, the ground for divorce will be “Irretrievable breakdown in relationship for a period of at least 6 months”, and we don’t necessarily need to have a legal separation for that

It is a requirement

you are not legally separated and the following is from NY Bar for "No fault " divorce 

If the lawyer wanted $5000 he might have been going for "grounds" for divorce for inhuman treatment and that's more intense

 

https://nysba.org/legalease-divorce-and-separation/#header1

 

The other (“no fault”) grounds are:

• one year of living apart under a separation agreement;
• one year of living apart under a separation decree granted by a court;
• an irretrievable breakdown of the marriage for a period of at least six months, provided that one spouse has so stated under

These “no fault” grounds afford New Yorkers a basis to get a “no-fault” divorce, in which neither spouse is judged to be at fault. Unquestionably, the “no fault” laws will provide a disincentive for people who wish to challenge the basis for the divorce.

 

[vamphog 24]

50 minutes ago, JeanneAdil said:

It is a requirement

you are not legally separated and the following is from NY Bar for "No fault " divorce 

If the lawyer wanted $5000 he might have been going for "grounds" for divorce for inhuman treatment and that's more intense

 

https://nysba.org/legalease-divorce-and-separation/#header1

 

The other (“no fault”) grounds are:

• one year of living apart under a separation agreement;
• one year of living apart under a separation decree granted by a court;
• an irretrievable breakdown of the marriage for a period of at least six months, provided that one spouse has so stated under

These “no fault” grounds afford New Yorkers a basis to get a “no-fault” divorce, in which neither spouse is judged to be at fault. Unquestionably, the “no fault” laws will provide a disincentive for people who wish to challenge the basis for the divorce.

 

 

So how come you are saying that it is a requirement, but then you post the acceptable grounds for No fault divorce and there it is: Irretrievable breakdown of the marriage for period of 6 months. I am confused.

 

and Yes, this is what I wanted, an No fault grounds, and, as for the attorney, No, she asked for 5K knowing that I am asking for uncontested/No fault divorce. I did not even mention to her that I had a Vawa case, she does not need to know that. All I asked her for is Uncontested divorce at No fault/Irretrievable breakdown of the relationship for 6 months and possibly help locating my spouse at current time, which I even offered to give her 3 addresses where he could potentially be living (last known address and his relatives addresses). 

 

 

[Boiler 45,468]

Because she needs to deal with all these issues to the satisfaction of the Court:

 

To prove the ground of irretrievable breakdown of the marriage the party seeking the divorce must demonstrate that: (1) the relationship between husband and wife has broken down irretrievably; (2) for a period of at least six months; (3) provided that one spouse states this under oath; and (4) proves that the “economic issues of equitable distribution of marital property, the payment or waiver of spousal support, the payment of child support, the payment of counsel and experts’ fees and expenses as well as the custody and visitation with the minor children of the marriage have been resolved by the parties, or determined by the court and incorporated into the judgment of divorce.”

 

Have you sought other quotes?