K1 or CR1

[Suncheer 4]

On 1/22/2024 at 5:34 PM, MissLadyRea said:

In the end, it's up to you if just a few months potentially faster is worth so many sacrifices. You may say you're cool with them now, but keep in mind it's significantly easier to say "I'm cool with this!" when it's not actually about to happen yet. I thought the same, that the stress others had wouldn't be my experience. I'm a homebody, I never go out so surely it would be fine.. right?

In reality, it was one of the hardest times I ended up facing. For many, it causes significant damage to their marriage to begin it with such a scary power-dynamic. For me, I was living in consistent fear and stress to the extent where I was barely able to think or do fun stuff for myself, it was just all focused on the situation. I was very fortunate my husband took no issue in the fact that for the first 6 months he had a wife that was just so out of it. A common thought I had was "If one of my family or friends got hospitalized and are in critical condition tomorrow, what would I do? (or even my family pet)" Do you stay and risk never seeing them again, or do you go back and restart EVERYTHING. Sure, you can try to expedite I-131 under the right conditions, but you cannot guarantee that the expedite will be processed in time.

The limbo stage doesn't just mean being stuck around bored, it's a dynamic where you CANT do the things you want to do. Can't travel out of country, cant work, in some cases drive. Very different than simply choosing to do that. 

But the thing is, just assuming how you'll feel about it now is not possible. It is such a major deal that those emotions are something that becomes real, when the moment comes. Even with a remote job in Canada, you cannot continue to do that work in the USA. 

You don't know how you'll feel, the logistics of it being possible does not mean it is something that wont cause you significant distress. And I cant stress enough; its one of those things you cant predict how you'll handle it.
 

Honestly, thank you so much for taking your time and explaining the reality of actually being under this process. You put so many things in perspective that I never really thought of and it has helped both my partner and I in making the right decision for us. Your words went a long way.

[Suncheer 4]

On 1/23/2024 at 10:39 AM, mam521 said:

THIS, THIS, THIS! 

 

Being an independent person who works, pays their own bills and is accustomed to a certain amount of freedom and then to surrender all that and become 100% dependent puts a LOT of stress on a relationship.  You're supposed to be creating the foundation for the rest of your lives as a married couple, not starting out under duress. You might think you can give it all up, but living the reality is very different.  Your partner has chosen you for you and you them for who they are.  You might end up giving up far too much of yourself if you approach in this way.  

 

CR1 means you can essentially continue life as is, as annoying as it might be, but you both retain your identities, you both continue to work, you both retain your freedoms.  When you cross the border with your CR1, you can work straight away, you can travel straight away, you can really just jump into the day to day with few worries and really build your marriage.  

Thank you for sharing. Both your perspectives has really helped in making a decision. As you said, while it is annoying the CR1 does seem like a far better option.

[powerpuff 6,680]

1 hour ago, rks_emelander said:

If the EAD is applied for on its own in addition to AOS, is it more likely to be granted sooner?

No.