Please help - I-601 waiver

[Mr RD 0]

Hi All. 
 

I am very new here and just joined today. Looking forward to getting advice and help from all you experienced ones. 
 

Here’s the story: 

~ I am the petitioner.

~ My wife is the beneficiary. (Has 1 conviction in her home country (theft from a friends house), which was classified as CIMT as per the CO during the interview)

My wife went for the CR1 interview few days ago and was given a refusal worksheet, her visa was refused and she was asked to apply for I-601 waiver as I am her qualifying relative, she was denied section 212 (a)(2)(a)(i)(I) the crime was committed in 2017. We have been working with an attorney from the very beginning of I -130 till now. The offense which she committed is regarded as petty offense in Texas. However, now that we have ended up with a waiver it’s very difficult and emotionally draining. 
 

I do not wish to go back to USA without her, it’s very challenging to live a phone based relationship and I know most of you have gone through this. I understand the waiver will be a painful journey. 
 

Here’s a little about me, please don’t judge me as I am getting a little vulnerable here:

- I have ADHD & OCD

- Potential Schizophrenia 

- Anxiety

- Panic disorder 

- Depression

- I am a Uber Driver  

- I am the only child 

- My parents are in their 70s

- Dad is handicapped (78 years)

- Mom retired in 2019 but had to go back to work since I flew to my wife and I couldn’t work so she’s providing financially. (She’s 70 years) 

 

Because i suffer mentally I am unable to cope up with separation from my wife and also I’m unable to deal with uncertainty. My wife’s country is not well advanced and they don’t have much knowledge on these things and unfortunately they don’t have therapists for this. They only have one psychiatric hospital which is for hospitalization only. Most of the medication are not available here either. Cost of living is very high and pay is extremely low (minimum wage is $2usd / per hour). Last year when the psychiatrist had mentioned that I may be a potential schizophrenic and that I may need to be hospitalized for diagnosis I was very scared and had panicked, I didn’t want to be hospitalized and not have my wife’s physical and emotional support. Therefore, we thought that she will be able to fly this year and so I could do my diagnosis once she’s with me, sadly it’s gotten worse with this waiver. I am still with her and I am willing to be here with her until the waiver gets approved, I don’t know hay lies ahead of us.

 

About my wife:

 

- She’s the only child 

- She was raised by her grandparents 

- Her mom died when my wife was 4years

- Her dad is not in the picture since he married another woman and moved on. 
- She lost her grandfather early this year and so now after losing him she has no one. Her aunt is in NZ, so my wife only has me and my parents. 
- Due to I-130 and Covid my wife could never meet my parents in person. 
- My wife has severe depression 

- she has one criminal conviction when she was 21. 

We got married in year 2021 during Covid-19 and none of my family could travel except me. My wife’s country's borders were still shut down but I had travelled on humanitarian grounds since she was able to obtain a favorable approval for me from the government at that time. Her grandfather was her everything and after losing him this year, it’s been very difficult for her. 

 

We do understand that me staying here may contradict my hardship, I know I can fly back and get my therapy session going and seek medical help but mentally and emotionally I will still be unstable without my wife. Please I will appreciate any and all the advice and help you all will give. I truly don’t desire to travel back to USA without my wife and my parents can’t travel to my wife’s country either since my dad is handicapped. Is my mental illness and being the only child to my aging parents a good factor to prove my extreme hardship for my wife’s I-601 waiver. 
 

Thank you in advance and I’m sorry for the long detail above. 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Boiler 45,482]

I assume your Lawyer is preparing the waiver.

 

You have excellent hardships but as you mentioned they are somewhat contradicted by you living and working in her Country.

 

What does your Lawyer advise?

[Mr RD 0]

7 minutes ago, Boiler said:

I assume your Lawyer is preparing the waiver.

 

You have excellent hardships but as you mentioned they are somewhat contradicted by you living and working in her Country.

 

What does your Lawyer advise?

Thank you so much for responding. 
 

we have a meeting with the lawyer next week whereby we’ll talk about what documents are needed and how this waiver works and other details. The waiver preparation has not started yet. 
 

I am actually not working in my wife’s country as  I am a Uber driver and they don’t have Uber here and also their driving rules are opposite to ours in USA. For instance we drive on the right lane with steering wheels on the left, however here it’s the opposite to that. My mom who is also the co sponsor to my wife’s CR1 is providing financially. 
 

Will I have to fly back before the waiver submission? Or could I fly back home for few weeks and come back to my wife? My wife’s country is almost 7000miles and costs a lot for airline tickets. 

[SalishSea 17,824]

1 hour ago, Mr RD said:

Thank you so much for responding. 
 

we have a meeting with the lawyer next week whereby we’ll talk about what documents are needed and how this waiver works and other details. The waiver preparation has not started yet. 
 

I am actually not working in my wife’s country as  I am a Uber driver and they don’t have Uber here and also their driving rules are opposite to ours in USA. For instance we drive on the right lane with steering wheels on the left, however here it’s the opposite to that. My mom who is also the co sponsor to my wife’s CR1 is providing financially. 
 

Will I have to fly back before the waiver submission? Or could I fly back home for few weeks and come back to my wife? My wife’s country is almost 7000miles and costs a lot for airline tickets. 

Only you can determine your own priorities.  Waivers are currently taking >one year.  

 

One concerning thing - are you really okay with allowing your elderly, retired mother to support you and your wife indefinitely?

 

What is your plan for providing for your own health insurance, and insurance for your wife when/if you are able to bring her here?  It doesn't sound to me like you're prepared to support an immigrant in the United States.  

[SalishSea 17,824]

1 hour ago, Mr RD said:

For instance we drive on the right lane with steering wheels on the left, however here it’s the opposite to that.

Many, many people are able to learn to adapt to driving on the other side of the road.  I drove the length of NZ's north island without a problem.   That will not be considered in the totality of your financial situation and the choice you're making to not work.

 

 

[Timona 4,207]

So your wife was in USA in 2017? I'm trying to figure out how Texas law is coming into this 

Edited October 25, 2023 by Timona

[Mr RD 0]

25 minutes ago, SalishSea said:

Only you can determine your own priorities.  Waivers are currently taking >one year.  

 

One concerning thing - are you really okay with allowing your elderly, retired mother to support you and your wife indefinitely?

 

What is your plan for providing for your own health insurance, and insurance for your wife when/if you are able to bring her here?  It doesn't sound to me like you're prepared to support an immigrant in the United States.  

My priority is to provide for my wife. I know I have to make some difficult decisions where I’ll have to fly back so that I can work and provide. 
 

No, I wouldn’t want my aged retired mom to keep providing for us. 
 

The separation is hard and it’ll be difficult to deal with. But I do agree with you. Thank you. 

[Mr RD 0]

24 minutes ago, SalishSea said:

Many, many people are able to learn to adapt to driving on the other side of the road.  I drove the length of NZ's north island without a problem.   That will not be considered in the totality of your financial situation and the choice you're making to not work.

 

 

Yes that’s right. No I’m not making a choice to no work but I am not allowed to work in my wife’s country. 

[Mr RD 0]

25 minutes ago, Timona said:

So your wife was in USA in 2017? I'm trying to figure out how Texas law is coming into this 

No, the crime happened in her home country. The lawyer had created a report about the conviction for NVC stage and for interview and that’s where the Texas Law came into. The crime that was committed by my wife in her country is regarded a petty offense as per the Texas Law. 

[SalishSea 17,824]

19 minutes ago, Mr RD said:

Yes that’s right. No I’m not making a choice to no work but I am not allowed to work in my wife’s country. 

Well, but it is a choice to live where you can’t work…

[SalishSea 17,824]

23 minutes ago, Mr RD said:

My priority is to provide for my wife. I know I have to make some difficult decisions where I’ll have to fly back so that I can work and provide. 
 

No, I wouldn’t want my aged retired mom to keep providing for us. 
 

The separation is hard and it’ll be difficult to deal with. But I do agree with you. Thank you. 

Most of us here have endured even years apart from our partners.   It’s kind of just par for the course when you choose someone from overseas.

[Boiler 45,482]

2 minutes ago, Mr RD said:

No, the crime happened in her home country. The lawyer had created a report about the conviction for NVC stage and for interview and that’s where the Texas Law came into. The crime that was committed by my wife in her country is regarded a petty offense as per the Texas Law. 

So nothing to do with Texas.

[beloved_dingo 1,976]

13 hours ago, Boiler said:

So nothing to do with Texas.

Perhaps OP is from Texas so they were using that as a comparison? That if the wife had committed the same crime in the U.S. it would have been considered a petty offense? 

 

To OP - I understand you want to be in your wife's country with her and that her support helps you. But it sounds like it also causes it's own host of issues (the lack of work and mental health services). I think you need to accept that being separated from your wife for a period of time is going to be necessary for this process.

 

Also...just food for thought. Making your wife basically 100% responsible for your mental health is not good for the relationship. I know you both want to be together. But you need to look at the big picture regarding her immigration journey AND your relationship. Perhaps being back in the U.S., getting treatment for your mental health issues, and working again would actually benefit your relationship greatly in the long run? 

[Boiler 45,482]

Local law matters

 

US Federal Law matters

 

Texas law generally does not, Cousin Marriage comes to mind hence generally.

[Mr RD 0]

8 hours ago, beloved_dingo said:

Perhaps OP is from Texas so they were using that as a comparison? That if the wife had committed the same crime in the U.S. it would have been considered a petty offense? - yes correct! Our lawyer had prepared documents for my wife’s conviction and had mentioned about the Texas law. Which is why I had mentioned that and I am from Texas. 

 

To OP - I understand you want to be in your wife's country with her and that her support helps you. But it sounds like it also causes it's own host of issues (the lack of work and mental health services). I think you need to accept that being separated from your wife for a period of time is going to be necessary for this process.- I totally agree with you and thank you for relaying it very kindly. Yes, it’ll be hard but we have to do what’s best for the waiver. 

 

Also...just food for thought. Making your wife basically 100% responsible for your mental health is not good for the relationship. I know you both want to be together. But you need to look at the big picture regarding her immigration journey AND your relationship. Perhaps being back in the U.S., getting treatment for your mental health issues, and working again would actually benefit your relationship greatly in the long run?

 

- we are making decisions on that and we’ll do that to keep our marriage intact.