Would You Have Moved There?

[crashandcari 0]

He11 no. I told the USICS at my interview I would not move to

Pakistan!

I cannot believe that some people answered "No" that they wouldn't move there. (Flame ready suit on). I would do ANYTHING it took to make our relationship work. Ali would do ANYTHING it took to make it work. I think it's sad to ask someone to leave their country and come to you when you would never even consider the same. We are two people in love that will sacrafice whatever it takes to be together and start or family. I would totally move to Lebanon in a heartbeat and live there if Ali's visa was not going to work out.

I belive I responded with HE11 NO! the USICS asked me at my interview. would i move to

pakistan with my husbnad I said flat out " NO " that wont happen. she said

waht if I deneid this petition. I said " ok, but i would wait til you changed your minds"

I would not be moving there NOPE! sad as you see it but that is your opinion. I am an american

I am not moving to no pakistan. vist yes certainly. live there no way in he11!

oh walked out of my interview with an approval! - thank you very much!

So really.. what if the visa had been denied? What would you have done since Pakistan is out of the question for you?

I do get that its "easier" to move to certain countries rather than others but is it about the country or your spouse?

[almaty 19]

no doubt..i liked almaty and if i could speak russian ..i would love to live there

Edited April 4, 2006 by almaty2004

[Satellite 1]

If he was from uk, austrailia, europe or even new zealand maybe, but pakistan? I don't think so.

Add Russia to that list! Not in a million years and I was born there. I was mostly displeased with how it is over there even when I was visiting! I like it here too much. Bribery corruption, low pay, authoritative regime, random searches and seizures, cold, etc.. Way too many reasons to stay in the US.

[chri'stina 190]

I cannot believe that some people answered "No" that they wouldn't move there. (Flame ready suit on). I would do ANYTHING it took to make our relationship work. Ali would do ANYTHING it took to make it work. I think it's sad to ask someone to leave their country and come to you when you would never even consider the same. We are two people in love that will sacrafice whatever it takes to be together and start or family. I would totally move to Lebanon in a heartbeat and live there if Ali's visa was not going to work out.

I agree...I've said it before in different topics that our relationship wasn't conditional, meaning "it'll only work out if he could move to the US". We knew when we were falling in love, it meant we had to decide if we were willing to do whatever it took to be together. I think every international couple has to tackle that and to me it's way too complicated if it depends only on the foreigner coming to the US. If Sujeet's visa had been denied,etc, I would have moved to India even though it'd be hard for me to live there. It's too stressful to be in a relationship where your being together depends only on if they can come to the US. I always wonder why people go into relationships like that when they know it could possibly mean they don't get to be together. There should not be those kinds of conditions on a relationship in my opinion. Or if someone can't bare to move to their love's country,they should find a 3rd country to live in together as a secondary plan.

About leaving children etc, I still don't understand someone committing to a relationship that is so conditional, that they cannot leave the US to be together. They should decide at the beginning of the relationship if they are willing to leave the US and are able to bring their children or not, or say this relationship cannot work if that person cannot come to the US.

It's about priorities and what is the most important thing in your life. If career is the most important, then it'd be complicated to get involved in an international relationship with the condition that you aren't moving. Also, if someone's surroundings are the top priority, again I don't understand getting involved in a international relationship when you might potentially have to move away. If someone's kids are top priority(which is excellent!), then they'd either have to see if they and their kids could potentially move, or else realize they might never be able to live with the person they fall in love with if they cannot move. My top priority was God, and then after meeting Sujeet he became 2nd priority, and I would have left the US, and my career(if I had one hehe) and my family(which I am extremely close to) to be with him. It'd be really hard but if I wanted to be with Sujeet, I'd have to do it. If I had kids I don't think I would have gotten involved in an international relationship unless we all could move if need be. Those are just my thoughts on it all. (when a loved one's visa just flat out gets denied and stays that way, is what I am referring to)

Edited April 4, 2006 by stina&suj

[sparkofcreation 0]

I cannot believe that some people answered "No" that they wouldn't move there. (Flame ready suit on). I would do ANYTHING it took to make our relationship work. Ali would do ANYTHING it took to make it work. I think it's sad to ask someone to leave their country and come to you when you would never even consider the same. We are two people in love that will sacrafice whatever it takes to be together and start or family. I would totally move to Lebanon in a heartbeat and live there if Ali's visa was not going to work out.

What if doing so meant abandoning your children, as someone said above? What if you needed medical attention you couldn't get there? What if, like me, you had spent years and gone tens of thousands of dollars in debt to build a profession and a professional reputation that would be absolutely worthless in the other country?

Not tryin to argue but I have one question for you ... What will you do if she gets denied ? And denied ? And denied ? If there was absolutely no way she can come here ? It was your choice to marry someone from overseas ... right ? Yes, I have a professional career here that is taking off pretty well. I will graduate from my university in December (I would never leave before graduation), however my husband is way more important then anything tangible. Give me the entire world on one hand and my husband on the other, and I would choose him ... no matter the circumstances, no strings attached. That's all I am trying to say. Haven't you ever heard of "for better or for worse" ?

He and I got married while he was here on a J-1. It was my choice to marry my husband, not just "someone from overseas." And he always knew I would never move to the UK, and he wouldn't ask me to. It was always understood that we would live in the US, though we've discussed the possibility of moving to Europe (but not the UK).

I would never marry someone who expected me to abandon my career.

[pbgirl 1]

Definitely. We are both open to it. But only time will tell if and when.

Edited April 5, 2006 by pbgirl

[American Lass 0]

I already did move to the UK to be closer to him. I've been here over 2 years. We made the conscious decision that we'd be much happier living in the US. We need sunshine, space and low prices!

[tsunamihart 0]

Si, Check us out in 5 years (the plan anyway) I'll be sitting by the Med, drink in hand, with my baby by my side watching our children play in the sand....

[Bootylicious!! 2]

I certainly would have moved. I don't know what kind of life we would have had in Mexico. I can't speak spanish so I couldn't work down there. We probably wouldn't have been able to live in the town he is from because he couldn't find a job there either. It would have been hard but I would have done anything to be with him. It would have all been worth it had that been what happened.

[MPGGPM 0]

So really.. what if the visa had been denied? What would you have done since Pakistan is out of the question for you?

I do get that its "easier" to move to certain countries rather than others but is it about the country or your spouse?

I also think moving to ANOTHER country should be mentioned and an option. I and my wife have talked about this, and would most likely do so if there was ever the chance that her visa be denied and the job opportunities were not viable for me in HER country , in order to move there. There is always the option of moving to Canada, the UK, etc....or some other country.

My wife is from Turkey, Istanbul, and I have actually applied and searched for a position there while she serves her 2 years J-1 residency requirement. Unfortunately, the difficulty of moving and the slim job possibilities stopped us from making that choice. It was something we both agreed on, to wait out the 2 years and for her to immigrate here, because it was matter of what would be best for us in the long run.

But, having to be separated from her for over a year now (we do visit each other as often as we can), with one more year to go, ...........I have the unfortunate luxary of knowing what my life is like without her. It must be hard for people to quite understand this, until they are in such a position as us.

One way or another though, if it came down to it................we'd find a way, in some country, tough as it may be to start from scratch......to be together again.

It's hard enough to be separated from her for 2 years.........much less forever.

We'd find a way............................

Edited April 9, 2006 by MPGGPM

[j&js 0]

James wanted to move here anyways and I think this is where we will be happiest, but if he hadn't wanted to leave Ireland I would have given life there a go. Even now, if he gets real homesick, although that doesn't appear to be happening yet!, I would be more then willing to try living over there.

[meddykomp 0]

And someday I plan to.

[meddykomp 0]

I cannot believe that some people answered "No" that they wouldn't move there. (Flame ready suit on). I would do ANYTHING it took to make our relationship work. Ali would do ANYTHING it took to make it work. I think it's sad to ask someone to leave their country and come to you when you would never even consider the same. We are two people in love that will sacrafice whatever it takes to be together and start or family. I would totally move to Lebanon in a heartbeat and live there if Ali's visa was not going to work out.

What if doing so meant abandoning your children, as someone said above? What if you needed medical attention you couldn't get there? What if, like me, you had spent years and gone tens of thousands of dollars in debt to build a profession and a professional reputation that would be absolutely worthless in the other country?

Not tryin to argue but I have one question for you ... What will you do if she gets denied ? And denied ? And denied ? If there was absolutely no way she can come here ? It was your choice to marry someone from overseas ... right ? Yes, I have a professional career here that is taking off pretty well. I will graduate from my university in December (I would never leave before graduation), however my husband is way more important then anything tangible. Give me the entire world on one hand and my husband on the other, and I would choose him ... no matter the circumstances, no strings attached. That's all I am trying to say. Haven't you ever heard of "for better or for worse" ?

See I would give up graduation for my husband ... I would give up almost anything for my husband .. but I would not abandon my children for him. Some people are in the position where they can leave and that is ok, but one thing to remember, just because the courts here give shared custody does NOT mean that both parents are equal. My ex does a lot of fun things with my daughter and she enjoys the time she spends with him, but in many ways he is just a big child himself. If I leave her she would not learn the things she needs to in order to succeed as an adult. How could my husband respect me if I leave her. How could he feel comfortable that I would do what is best for a child we have together if I do that. It isn't about my love for my husband. It's about putting my childs needs before myself.

[Aymerlu 3]

I'd move there now if I could, but my ex would blow a gasket if I took the kiddos.

[babybunny 2]

He11 no. I told the USICS at my interview I would not move to

Pakistan!

I cannot believe that some people answered "No" that they wouldn't move there. (Flame ready suit on). I would do ANYTHING it took to make our relationship work. Ali would do ANYTHING it took to make it work. I think it's sad to ask someone to leave their country and come to you when you would never even consider the same. We are two people in love that will sacrafice whatever it takes to be together and start or family. I would totally move to Lebanon in a heartbeat and live there if Ali's visa was not going to work out.

I belive I responded with HE11 NO! the USICS asked me at my interview. would i move to

pakistan with my husbnad I said flat out " NO " that wont happen. she said

waht if I deneid this petition. I said " ok, but i would wait til you changed your minds"

I would not be moving there NOPE! sad as you see it but that is your opinion. I am an american

I am not moving to no pakistan. vist yes certainly. live there no way in he11!

oh walked out of my interview with an approval! - thank you very much!

So really.. what if the visa had been denied? What would you have done since Pakistan is out of the question for you?

I do get that its "easier" to move to certain countries rather than others but is it about the country or your spouse?

it was not denied. so guess shonnie wont be moving to pakistan. nothign in HELL would make me move to pakistan against my wishes..