Looking for work... Driving me crazy!!!!!!!

[Marry American 0]

i think I am going to loose my mind.. patience.. and everything else

he never shuts up about work.. and making money.. mean while he has NO idea about the American legal system.. he has NO SSN... NO working permit.. No credit history

he wants to rent a space to make it a garage to park cars..

he wants to buy a car and resell it

he want to buy clothes on a discount.. and resell it full price

he wants to open a dollar store

he wants to buy a gas station

he wants to rent a small shop for Koshari

I want to FREAK OUT!!!!!!!!!!.. HE WANTS ALL THIS TO HAPPEN NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this very fcuking SECOND!!!!!!

sounds like my situation...my husband could not understand that he had to wait for his social security number before he could get a job...he was very impatient...he felt as a man he needed to bring money home

[Marry American 0]

all the time he picks fight........ Even NOW... he wants me to rent in MY NAME (my credit is BAD) some space a HOUR away.. he has No idea where it is.. to rent it to park cars... I tell him its a bad Idea.. Now he is freaking out.. tell me I dont wanna help him in anything

I told him .. go walk around and ask about work.. Introduce your self... He says No he cant do that.. there are several gas stations around me with muslims... Go talk to them.. No I hate the smell of Gas

i am serioulsy biting my tongue so I just dont start bawling at my desk.......

i am sooo overwhlemed.. I'd drive home to take a Zanax.. but he is there and I dont wanna deal with him

the idea about renting a space for parking cars may not be such a bad idea...look into it...my daughter's friend at school rented a space for very cheap and made about $2,000 in one weekend....he is a college student studying to become a doctor so that money was very useful for him...this particular weekend was a special event in that town...but it may still be a good ides where you are

[Jenn! 918]

all the time he picks fight........ Even NOW... he wants me to rent in MY NAME (my credit is BAD) some space a HOUR away.. he has No idea where it is.. to rent it to park cars... I tell him its a bad Idea.. Now he is freaking out.. tell me I dont wanna help him in anything

I told him .. go walk around and ask about work.. Introduce your self... He says No he cant do that.. there are several gas stations around me with muslims... Go talk to them.. No I hate the smell of Gas

i am serioulsy biting my tongue so I just dont start bawling at my desk.......

i am sooo overwhlemed.. I'd drive home to take a Zanax.. but he is there and I dont wanna deal with him

the idea about renting a space for parking cars may not be such a bad idea...look into it...my daughter's friend at school rented a space for very cheap and made about $2,000 in one weekend....he is a college student studying to become a doctor so that money was very useful for him...this particular weekend was a special event in that town...but it may still be a good ides where you are

Parking spaces in NYC have been sold for $250K recently for that very purpose!

But anyway, I think you could be on to something, more generally speaking, I mean.

Don't just dismiss his ideas and plans as hare-brained, no matter how much you think they are. He really is just thinking about how he's going to make a good life for you guys. While you need to make sure you are a voice of reason, constantly being the "wet blanket" will be tiring, for both you and him. I think that opening your mind, even just a little, to his persepctive will go a long way in getting him to see your side of things too.

[peezey 0]

I don't see how spending money (that you don't have) to make money (if you are lucky) on your wife's credit (#######!) the minute you get here when there are kids and a wife and debt is anything more than harebrained. And selfish.

Edited July 24, 2007 by peezey

[ya falaha! 0]

It's all in the delivery...on both sides. He's not gonna win you over with demands, guilt trips and shouting. You're not gonna win him over with melt downs and attitude. There's gotta be a compromise. Like Jen said, listen to what he's saying and give it some thought (not wild harebrained schemes, I'm talking the more reasonable ideas). Maybe if you give what he says some thought without being dismissive, he'll lay off a bit.

Edited July 24, 2007 by moody

[Marry American 0]

the parking space this young man rented cost him a couple of hunded dollars...no credit was used...a small price to pay for the possibility of making thousands

Edited July 24, 2007 by i adore you

[Jenn! 918]

It's all in the delivery...on both sides. He's not gonna win you over with demands, guilt trips and shouting. You're not gonna win him over with melt downs and attitude. There's gotta be a compromise. Like Jen said, listen to what he's saying and give it some thought. Maybe if you give what he says some thought without being dismissive, he'll lay off a bit.

Exactly.

It doesn't mean that you're gonna "give in" to his demands. But if you say, "we don't have the money for that now, but I think that might be a good idea for something to work and save for", it's going to go over a whole lot better than telling him what a stupid idea that is and how could he even dare talk about that right now. IMO, the second way is only going to build resentment, both ways.

[peezey 0]

I don't see him saying any of this is for YOUR future together, it's all about him and what you will do for him. Sure, having a fit at him doesn't solve anything, but he needs to change his attitude quick.

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

I don't see how spending money (that you don't have) to make money (if you are lucky) on your wife's credit (#######!) the minute you get here when there are kids and a wife and debt is anything more than harebrained. And selfish.

OMG !!! Dare I believe my eyes ???? Harebrained !!!! Spelled correctly !!!!! On an internet message board !!!!!!!

LOL step up and collect your trophy !

OMG it's more amazing that I thought. I have just been informed that lightning has actually struck twice in the same spot today, and we have TWO champions !

Don't just dismiss his ideas and plans as hare-brained, no matter how much you think they are. He really is just thinking about how he's going to make a good life for you guys.

LOL step up and collect your trophy !

D'oh !!!!!

Like Jen said, listen to what he's saying and give it some thought (not wild harebrained schemes, I'm talking the more reasonable ideas).

LOL step up and collect your trophy !

Edited July 24, 2007 by wife_of_mahmoud

[mybackpages 0]

I don't see how spending money (that you don't have) to make money (if you are lucky) on your wife's credit (#######!) the minute you get here when there are kids and a wife and debt is anything more than harebrained. And selfish.

OMG !!! Dare I believe my eyes ???? Harebrained !!!! Spelled correctly !!!!! On an internet message board !!!!!!!

LOL step up and collect your trophy !

OMG it's more amazing that I thought. I have just been informed that lightning has actually struck twice in the same spot today, and we have TWO champions !

Don't just dismiss his ideas and plans as hare-brained, no matter how much you think they are. He really is just thinking about how he's going to make a good life for you guys.

LOL step up and collect your trophy !

I object to the term harebrained. What did the rabbit ever do to you?

ps just jealous because I want a trophy, but my poor typing, sticky laptop keyboard and overall lack of interest in proofreading means I will never get one.

[Jenn! 918]

I don't know if I deserve mine, I put a hyphen in there.

[mybackpages 0]

I don't know if I deserve mine, I put a hyphen in there.

maybe I would have too if my hyphen key was working on this crazy laptop We will never know

[ya falaha! 0]

I don't think I deserve mine either...I copied off of Jen. However, in my defense I did know how to spell it because since when does hair have a brain?

Edited July 24, 2007 by moody

[mybackpages 0]

I don't see him saying any of this is for YOUR future together, it's all about him and what you will do for him. Sure, having a fit at him doesn't solve anything, but he needs to change his attitude quick.

I'm not sure this is true about her husband, but this is the risk of venting on a public forum. You can make your situation sound like something its not.

[deemabrouk 0]

I don't see how spending money (that you don't have) to make money (if you are lucky) on your wife's credit (#######!) the minute you get here when there are kids and a wife and debt is anything more than harebrained. And selfish.

honestly I agree with you